Epiphany is written by Staind
The Road to Past and Present
by Kuro Angales
Sanoksuke sighed happily as his family came out to greet him, except one member of his family. The most important one of all. He saw Kenshin finishing the laundry out in the back. The small rurouni walked past him with the dry load and didn't say a word or acknowlegde the fighter. Sano had a feeling it would be like this. After all, they had been on the verge of something the few days before he decided to leave.
{Start Flashback}
Your words to me just a whisper
Your faces so unclear
I try to pay attention
Your words just disappear
Kenshin and Sano had been drinking a little that night and were hanging out at his dingy aparment. They talked about old times and then about their second fight. The rurouni had whispered quietly, "I thought I would lose you to him..." Sanosuke had just riased an eyebrow and a long silence streched out between them. "I knew you were leaving that night."
Sanosuke turned to Kenshin. His friend was lying sprawed out on the floor with one arm under his head and the other next to Sanosuke's arm. "How did you know?", he asked quietly.
The red haired samurai turned to him. His hair caught the light and it turned red and gold. Sano's breath caught in his throat as his mouth dropped open slightly, but he slowly closed it. "You threw a party that night. And you invited Megumi......why haven't you dated her yet?" The tall fighter lowered his head and his his eyes with his bangs. This was the one question he hoped Kenshin would never ask. The seconds dragged out painfully slow. "Ne, Sano?" Kenshin asked him again and he had to answer.
"Because I care about someone more than her," his voice was filled with regret and he stood up to put his 'aku' jacket back on. It had gotten warm in the room from the sake and he had taken it off. As he put it back on, he thought he saw a look of loss in Kenshin's eyes. 'It must be the light,' he thought to himself.
"Sou ka..... anata?", Kenshin said and sat up while straightening himself out.
"You'll find out sometime Kenshin...," he muttered under his breath, not sure if Kenshin heard or not. "I think you should be getting home. Jo-chan will be worried." His brown eyes were fixed on the violet of Kenshin's. He almost thought he saw something else in those eyes besides friendship. 'Damn candles!', he thought again and turned away from Kenshin as he headed towards the door.
"Aa. Oyasuminasai, Sano....," his voice was quiet and it sounded as if he was going to cry. Sanosuke turned around, but the rurouni was gone. He slid open the door, but he was already almost out of sight.
{End Flashback}
'Cause its always raining in my head
Forget all the things I should have said
Kenshin walked quicker as he passed by Sanosuke. He quickly placed the laundry in the right places and ran to his room. The presence of Sano was driving him crazy. He was either going to keep running or confess. The Battousai inside of him yelled about how he shouldn't run and how it doesn't matter. His heart was breaking in his chest. If Kaoru ever figured out what was going on, her heart would break too. It was bad enough that had gotten close to so many people, he didn't want to hurt anyone anymore.
So I speak to you in riddles because
My words get in my way. I smoke the
whole thing to my head and feel it
wash away
The samurai started to cry again. 'How stupid must he think I am. Sessha....I am a hypocrite trying to live this pointless life. I want to save people, but I create problems for the people I protect. None of this would have happened if I had left town that night. I speak like a sage with my 'de gozaru's. Dakedo.... I am just a person who lived through a war. The emotional scars I have don't allow me to talk the way I do. If I can't figure out my own problems...who am I.....'
'cause i can't take anymore
of this, I want to come apart.
or dig myself a little hole inside
your precious heart
The ex-fight-for-hire sat in the backyard of the dojo. He knew he would have to tell Kenshin how he felt. This idea had been running through his head a thousand times or more. Sano even thought of how it would go when he returned. Everything did go the way he thought, until Kenshin didn't come to see him. That almost made him cry right there. Kenshin had always infulenced the things he did since he met the man. He admired everything Kenshin ever did and his admiration changed into something else. It changed into love. It was a love stronger than the one he felt for Sagara Souzou or for Takani Megumi. Himura Kenshin was his soulmate and he was sure about it. But why wouldn't he respond the same way. Kenshin always cared about everyone, why couldn't he see that he was breaking Sanosuke's heart.
'Cause its always raining in my head
Forget all the things I should have said
Kaoru entered Kenshin's room and didn't notice he was crying. She talked about how Yahiko was going with her to get tofu and asked if he wanted to come. "Iie," he said simply and she felt his forhead again. She told him to lie back down and get some rest. He did so until she left. It was time for him to face Sanosuke. Kenshin rose up off th bed and straightened his yukata. If he didn't do it now, he would be afraid to see Sano for the rest of his life.
I am nothing more than a little boy inside
That cries out for attention
yet I always try to hide
Sanosuke remembered how alone he felt when Sagara Souzou died. He wandered and frought his whole young life in order to get stronger. Even then, he wasn't strong enough to defeat love. Although he didn't know it was love that he fought when he went up against Kenshin. That man had love and hope. That fueled his every ambition and that's why he is invincible.
It was amazing that Kenshin treated him as an equal, eventhough he was much younger. throughout their whole friendship they ahd been equal towards each other. So why was he so afraid to talk to his equal. Kenshin had been in love before so he must know the heartache Sano was going through.
'Cause I talk to you like children,
Though I don't know how I feel
But I know I'll do the right thing
If the right thing is revealed
As Kenshin walked, he knew with every step, that he was in love with Sagara Sanosuke. There was almost no denying it anymore. He treated Sanosuke like an equal. So, the most Sanosuke could do was hit him. He was fully prepared for the rejection and what it will bring. But, if he didn't try, then there was no point of loving him at all.
Kenshin found Sanosuke still in the backyard. He walked up slowly and put a hand of Sano's shoulder.The boy was so wrapped up in his thoughts, he didn't sense Kenshin coming. "You're home. I'm glad."
Sanosuke turned around quickly and jumped up with a start. "Ne, Kenshin! Don't scare me like that!" The initial reaction caused the smile on Kenshin's face to fall. His eyes remained wide and full of emotion, emotion Sano had never seen before in those eyes: love. "You..you missed me?" Kenshin nodded and leaned forward to hug the tall fighter. Sanosuke held him back and tilted his chin up. A puzzled look washed over Kenshin's face until Sano smiled. He leaned forward and kissed Kenshin soundly on the lips.
Kaoru and Yahiko came home at that moment and the two lovers broke apart quickly. They were still hugging when Yahiko came into the backyard. He took one look at them and smiled. Yahiko just whistled when he walked away. Kenshin didn't care anymore and he started to cry into Sanosuke's chest. "Ai shiteru Sano.....koi...," he whispered and the arms around his waist hugged a little tighter.
'Cause its always raining in my head
Forget all the things I should have said