TITLE: Learning Curve
AUTHOR: Blue Shoe 22
RATING: PG
SPOILERS: General for all of Buffy up to 'The Gift' and maybe some for first and second season Angel.
SUMMARY: After his return form Pylea and the news of Buffy's death Gunn witnesses the reactions of those around him and he has to wonder – who is Buffy?
CHAPTER ONE
The Princess
So you wanna know about Buffy, huh?
Oh yeah, Angel's upset. Buffy was like, the love of his life. They had the whole ' star-crossed lovers' thing going on, you know, the vampire with a soul in love with the Vampire Slayer. When one of them dies, it's like, angst city.
Yep. Ages ago. Got brought back to life with CPR. That's how Faith got here. You know 'one dies and another is called'. She killed him once too, sent him to hell, but he came back. I guess…I guess that she won't though.
No! I'm not upset. It's just…its Buffy! She always wins and then they celebrate and she goes back to being whiney and annoying and everyone's happy.
Oh look, now you've made my make-up run. No, I didn't hate her, well maybe I did for a while – everything bad that's ever happened to me is her fault – but that's over now, been over for a while. I mean dealing with vampires and demons and assasins, that was her job. She had the super-strength and speed and her spidey-sense thingy, I was just plain old Cordy.
The things is though, all she ever wanted was to be a normal girl. She'd go out and party at the Bronze then patrol the cemeteries and kill nastys until three in the morning and then do her homework and get ripped for falling asleep in class the next day. She went clubbing, got expelled, came back, fought with her Mom and little sister and save the world on weekends.
We had a moment once. The Big Bad in town then, in senior year, was some vampire called Trip or Tick or something, and he decided he wanted to get rid of the Slayers. There was this big confusion thing though and somehow they thought that I was Faith. It was right before Homecoming dance and we were hiding in this derelict cabin out in the woods being chased by demons and German's wearing our big froofy dresses and high heels.
But Buffy was all cool, calm and collected. She had a gun or something and I had a wooden spatula and we were just sitting there waiting for someone to come and kill us.
We'd been having this fight. I supposed to tell her about year book photos but I was too self involved to even consider thinking about anyone but me so I didn't bother. She was mad and decided to beat me at my own game (as if she could have) and run for Homecoming Queen. We were stuck together in the first place because the gang had decided we needed to make up.
I think I must have been complaining or something, blaming her for it, and she just looks at me and says 'Do you think I wanted this' and told me how she hadn't chosen to be the Slayer, it had chosen her, and how she had just wanted a little bit of normal and she ended up on the run from demon assassins.
I'd never felt so small and … petty. I was such a bitch to her. I tried to make her 'normal' life hell and hadn't even bothered to think what it must have been like for her. I guess I know now. My visions, helping Angel, nearly dying once a week. I keep thinking that maybe it's karma – the Powers paying me back for being such a bitch. And now…and now I just keep thinking that I shouldn't complain, that she'd been doing this since she was fifteen and now she's dead and it's not fair.
Thanks. I needed to get that out. I think I'll just sit here and have a little cry. You're a good listener Gunn. I hope I've helped.