Part Two
Bosco glanced around the empty room and sighed. When they had made it to the hospital, Doc had wheeled Faith in to the ER quickly. Kim had stayed with him. They were treating him like a child. Everyone looked at him strangely. They were all waiting for him to explode in normal Boscorelli fashion.
The doctor told him that he needed stitches in his head and said to stay until someone could get
to him. He could see Sully standing outside his door; he stood like he was guarding it. Bosco
wasn't sure if he was guarding it against someone coming in or just making sure he didn't get out.
He looked down at his hands; they had begun to shake again. He needed to get out of there.
No one had told him anything about Faith. He clung to Kim's assurances that she was going to
be fine. He knew that she was only trying to calm him down. He was trying to stay calm; he
could feel himself losing the battle.
He played the moment over and over in his head. He remembered the tight grip on his throat;
he hadn't been able to breathe and had swung at the man. When he had been released, he had
been confused and gasping for air. When he saw...no, when he *felt* another figure over him he
had automatically turned and fired the gun that he still held firmly in his hand.
Why did he do that? He knew better. You don't fire your weapon unless you see who your aiming
at. That was first year, basic stuff, he knew that. She had been trying to help. He had shot her
when she was trying to help him. How could this be happening?
The door opened and Bosco jerked his head up. Sergeant Christopher stood in the doorway
scowling at him. Bosco could see Sully standing in the door behind him, but Christopher shut
the door before Sully could follow him in.
"We've never gotten along have we, Boscorelli?"
Bosco ground his teeth together and forced his eyes to look away from him. This was all he
needed; he wasn't going to get into it with Christopher. He had already made the worst mistake
of his life today and getting into it with Christopher wasn't going to make it any better.
Bosco thought the other man was a fool; he never understood why he had been made a Sergeant.
The fact that Christopher had heard Bosco compare him to Mickey Mouse probably hadn't
helped his general attitude toward him though. Christopher took every opportunity to stick it
to Bosco.
"Nothing to say?"
Christopher took a step toward Bosco until he was standing next to the exam table; Bosco looked
up into the other man's eyes. "I knew it was just a matter of time before you screwed up royally.
But, I never dreamed that you would be so stupid. How could you shoot your own partner?"
Bosco felt a rush of anger then a stab of guilt as he looked in the other man's eyes.
A loud tap startled both men and they jumped. Sully was tapping on the window and motioning
at their Lieutenant. He was standing a few feet from him, and had a stern look on his face as he
glanced at his watch.
Christopher huffed and then turned on his heel and went to the door. He paused and then looked
back over his shoulder at Bosco. "Yokas is a good cop, sure hope she makes it," he said, then
pushed the door open and walked out.
He hadn't expected that; the statement felt like a blow to his stomach. Faith was a good cop.
But she was a great friend and partner. The last words she had said to him was telling him to
never speak to her again.
Oh god, what if he never got a chance, what if...
Bosco's head began to spin and his stomach lurched suddenly. His was going to be sick, he
couldn't stop it. He jumped from the bed and stumbled toward the sink against the wall. He
barely made it before the contents of his stomach forced their way out. After everything was up,
he couldn't stop, he stood there and continued to heave for what felt like forever. Thoughts of
Faith were tumbling around his mind and all he wanted was everything to just stop.
He felt a hand on his shoulder and one on his back. He continued to heave and his eyes began
to water. He could hear Sully's voice but he couldn't make out the words. When he finally
stopped, he sunk to the floor next to the sink, pulled up his legs, and buried his head in his knees.
He ignored the pain in his stomach and the pounding in his head as he took huge breaths and
tried to stop the tears that were threatening to start.
Sully squatted down in front of him but didn't say a word. They sat that way for a long time
until Bosco heard Sully clear his throat. "Bosco, get up."
Bosco shook his head and tightened his arms around his knees. He wanted to stay here. He just
wanted everyone to leave him alone. Why couldn't everyone just leave him alone?
"Bosco, listen to me. Are you listening?" Sully paused then continued when Bosco refused to
answer him. "This is not helping anyone. You screwed up."
The words felt like another punch. He jerked his head up and looked at the older man. He had
been prepared to see pity but not the anger that he saw in the older man's eyes.
"You don't have to tell me what happened in there. I know. You went in there determined to
grab everyone all by yourself and be the hero. But you got into trouble and the only thing that
went through your head was getting the other person first. You forgot that Faith was with you
and when she came up behind you, you fired."
Bosco opened his mouth then closed it. How did he know?
Sully sighed and sank to the floor beside Bosco.
"The partner I got assigned after Ty's dad died was an asshole. Tony was loud and obnoxious
and he didn't care about anyone else. He wanted to be the first one in and he needed to be the
hero. Sound like someone you know?"
Sully paused and studied Bosco. Bosco looked away, he couldn't meet his eyes. He focused his
stare on a trashcan near the door of the room.
"Well, one day we got this call that some dirt bag had robbed this store and grabbed this little
old lady as a hostage. We were the first ones there. Tony ignored me when I told him to wait.
He ran into the store and left me outside by myself. I heard gunfire almost immediately and I
ran in after him. He was wrestling around on the floor with this guy. The little old lady was lying
in the corner bleeding and I froze, I didn't know what to do. They were just blindly grabbing at
his gun. It was over before I could move. Tony fired his gun point-blank into the guy's face.
Blood went everywhere, before I knew it I reached for him; I wasn't thinking and apparently
neither was he. He turned the gun on me and fired. Lucky he caught me in the vest but I hated
him for it, I still do."
Sully stopped speaking. Then he struggled to his feet and stepped away from Bosco. Bosco
shuddered and looked back at Sully. He was standing a few feet away, looking down at him.
He was taking deep breaths trying to get control. All these years he had known him Bosco
had never heard him speak of any other partner except for Ty's dad.
"Why are you telling me this?"
He thinks Faith will hate me, too. Bosco closed his eyes trying to force that thought out of his
mind. Of course, Faith would hate him. He had been stupid and reckless and everything else
that she had ever said he was.
"Faith is going to hate me, too," he whispered.
"Bosco, hey look at me."
Sully's words were no longer angry, his voice was soft. Bosco opened his eyes to see him
standing over him with his hand held out.
Bosco took it and let Sully pull him to his feet. When he got to his feet Sully pulled him over
to the bed and pushed him down on it.
"I hated Tony; I couldn't get pass what he did. But, I didn't like him before that, so there was
no way I was going to care what happened to him afterward. For some reason Faith cares about
you. She needs you. You have to talk to her. You have to make this right."
"I can't. Sully what happens if ..."
Bosco couldn't bring himself to finish the thought, much less the sentence. Faith was all he had;
she was his only real friend.
The door swung open and the sound made both of them jump. A young doctor stood in the
doorway. He looked uncomfortable; he knew that he had just walked into something that he
had no business being in the middle of. Sully cleared his throat and stepped back from Bosco.
"Hey, Doc. Bosco got sick I think he opened his head up again."
Bosco hadn't realized it before but he now felt the warm blood slowly creeping down the side
of his face. The doctor nodded and walked over to Bosco. As the doctor gently probed his now
bleeding forehead, Sully took another step backwards toward the door.
"Hey, how about I go find out Faith is?"
Bosco watched him turn and go. Then he stared directly ahead at Doctor Swisher's nametag.
He tried to push the building anxiety away and convince himself that everything was going to
be fine.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Sully returned just as Doctor Swisher was finishing up. The young doctor had been rambling
about something the entire time it took him to put three stitches in his head. Bosco searched
Sully's face for news, but he couldn't read the other man's face at all.
"Okay, Officer, the stitches will need to be removed in two weeks. I don't think there was any
permanent damage done to your neck. I'm sure the marks will heal nicely."
Bosco nodded at him as he turned and left the room. "How is she?"
Sully smiled. "She's going to be fine, Bosco."
Relief flooded through Bosco. He couldn't stop the grin that came to his face. Faith was going to
be okay. He hadn't killed her. Thank you, God.
"The bullet hit her in the shoulder at the edge of her vest; it probably saved her. Doc said that
an artery was probably nicked because there was a lot of blood. They took her to surgery and got
the bullet out. Her doctor said that everything went great and they are moving her from recovery
right now. You can go see her."
The grin disappeared from his face and guilt came flooding back with a rush. She wouldn't have
had to be in surgery if it wasn't for him.
Bosco looked down at his hands.
He heard Sully sigh and take a step toward him. "Christopher is out there waiting to talk to you
again. But I convinced him to lay off until you get to see Faith. The lieutenant agreed with me."
"Why?"
"I told you earlier, you need to make this right. I know you don't want to but you got to face her."
Bosco knew he was right. He had been fighting his feelings. He was afraid and he hated being
afraid. Bosco slid off the bed and followed Sully out into the hall.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Bosco tried to ignore the stares of his fellow officers in the halls as he followed Sully to Faith's
room.
He froze when he saw Emily and Charlie sitting in a couple of chairs in the hallway. They
looked like they had been crying. An older woman was sitting between them, whispering in their
ears and stroking their hair. He had almost killed their mother; he had almost made them orphans.
Sully had stopped and was now standing in-between him and the two children. Sully pulled
Bosco past the two kids. Bosco slowed again when he saw Fred.
Faith's husband was standing in the hallway talking to Christopher and his lieutenant. He looked
up when they approached. Bosco wasn't prepared for the fury he saw in the other man's eyes,
it made him flinch and stop for the second time in a few seconds. They had never liked each
other: Bosco thought he wasn't good enough for Faith; Fred thought he was a jerk.
"Bosco, let's go. " Sully tried to get Bosco moving again.
Fred took a step toward him but Sully blocked his way.
Fred ignored Sully. "You almost killed my wife. How dare you come here?" he shouted at Bosco.
Bosco took a step back from the angry man. His stomach tightened; there was nothing to say.
What could he say? Fred was right. He had almost killed her. He had almost made the most
horrible mistake of his life. He was kidding himself. Faith would never forgive him for this.
He couldn't forgive himself, how could he even hope that she would be able to?
Sully pushed Fred back, "Calm down."
Fred threw up his hands and took a step back. Bosco could hear Emily cry out, the sound cut
into Bosco and he began to shake his head, he couldn't do this. He felt like turning and running
but his legs refused to obey him.
He had to say something, he didn't know what. "Fred..."
Fred shoved Sully aside and lunged at Bosco. He was on him so quickly that Bosco had no time
to react. Fred slammed him into the wall and began to slug him in the face. Bosco made no move
to protect him self.
You deserve it, his mind yelled at him.
Fred hit him two times before Sully and Christopher could pull him off. They wrestled him back
and held onto him.
Bosco's vision was blurred and his knees buckled as he let himself slide to the floor. He could
feel blood running from his nose and pain flooded through his already throbbing head. He heard
Charlie running to them and calling daddy and Sully telling Fred to calm down. He looked up at
Fred.
Fred was still mad, but then the dreaded pity spread across his face as well. Bosco watched him
as he shook out of Sully and Christopher's hold and picked his son up. He buried his face in his
son's hair and then turned and walked back down the hall toward Emily.
Sully bent down in front of Bosco. "Bosco? Hey, talk to me," he said quietly.
Bosco sniffed and closed his eyes. He leaned his head against the wall behind him and tried to
block out everyone around him. He was fighting the urge to get up and sprint out of the hospital.
"Officer Boscorelli, maybe this should wait," Christopher said.
"No," he whispered as he opened his eyes. "If I don't do this now," he whispered to Sully.
He left the words 'I'll never be able to live with myself' unsaid, but from the look in Sully's eyes,
Bosco knew the other man understood. Sully nodded at him then stood and took a step back.
Bosco got to his feet slowly. He clenched his fists at his sides and then stepped towards Faith's
door.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
When he stepped into the room, the first thing he saw was Faith, and she was looking at him
with one eyebrow raised at an odd angle. It caught him off guard; he hadn't expected to confront
her questioning eyes so soon.
Bosco let out a slow breath and stepped across the room until he was standing by her bed.
She was propped up in the narrow bed with two pillows behind her. Her shoulder and neck
were bandaged and she looked sleepy.
The first thing she said to him was, "What the hell happened to you?"
Bosco blinked. He didn't know what he had expected her to say but that definitely wasn't it.
Then he remembered his nose. His hand went to his nose without him thinking about it and he
shrugged. What should he tell her? He definitely wasn't going to tell her that Fred might have
broken his nose in the hallway in front of her kids.
"How do you feel?" he quietly asked.
Faith narrowed her eyes. "I got shot, Boz, how do you think I feel?"
He clamped his mouth shut for fear of saying something else stupid. He let out a breath and
closed his eyes briefly. He tried to slow his racing heartbeat, but what he was really doing was
stalling. Faith knew him better than anyone did and she called him on it.
"Bosco, it's all right," Faith whispered.
Bosco's eyes snapped open and his eyes caught hers. She had a sad smile on her face. He knew
she meant it but he couldn't let himself off the hook. He raised his hands to stop her from saying
anything else. He had a lot to say, and if she stopped him, he knew that he would never get
everything out.
"Faith, I'm sorry. You told me to stay outside and I ignored you. You're always trying to help me
and I never listen to you. I know I hide behind this attitude that I got going. For most people it
works great."
Faith opened her mouth to say something and Bosco shook his head. He took a couple of steps
away toward the window and turned his back on her. He stared at a window in the other wing
of the hospital.
He couldn't look at her. If he looked at her he would never say what he wanted to say. Never say
what he had to say. He had almost lost the chance and he was going to lay it all out on the line
now.
He cleared his throat and continued, "I guess the less people I have, the smaller the chance that
somebody is going to hurt me. But you never fall for it and that scares me. I don't have many
people in this world. Hell after what I did to Mickey and then what Hobart…"
Bosco stopped and took a deep breath; he hadn't wanted Hobart to become an issue in his life
again so soon. He was still hurt and confused by the older man's suicide, especially about the
part that he had played in the whole thing.
"I guess the number has been getting smaller lately. I don't know what I would do if I lost you,
too."
Bosco turned to look at Faith. She was crying.
"I don't think I would be able to take it. God, Faith, I'm so sorry."
Bosco felt tears flowing down his cheeks. He made no attempt to stop them, he just stood there
waiting for Faith to say something.
She didn't say anything for a long moment then she held up her hand to him. Bosco stepped
slowly forward and took it. She pulled him forward, he let her pull him down until he was
leaning over her and their faces were inches apart. She stared at him for a second.
Then she sniffed and squeezed his hand in hers.
"You will never lose me, you got that? Never," She whispered
"But.."
Why didn't she hate him? He had almost killed her today, why did she still care?
Faith shook her head to shut him up then smiled up at him. "I know you didn't mean for this to
happen but it did. Boz, you scare me all the time. I live in fear of the day when your luck runs
out. You always rush into every situation not caring about yourself. You have tostop it. You're
not the only one out there. Next time one of us might not be so lucky."
She tugged at his hand; he let himself be pulled intoher arms.
"I'm your friend, Bosco, I love you. Let me inside sometime, okay," she whispered.
Bosco took a deep breath; he was trying to control the emotions and the tears that were now
flowing freely down his face. He felt Faith shudder under his arms and he held her as tightly
as he could without putting any of his weight on her injured shoulder.
"I love you, too, Faith, and I don't deserve you."
Bosco could hear Faith chuckle.
"No, you don't."
Bosco stayed that way in her arms until she fell asleep. He carefully stood up and looked down
at her. Her eyes were closed and she was peacefully sleeping. He used his sleeve to wipe away
any evidence of stray tears, then smoothed a stray hair out of her eyes.
Faith had forgiven him. But, Bosco couldn't shake the deep fear that this would happen again.
He would rush in to someplace without thinking and next time he might not be so lucky. He had
meant what he had said to her; he wouldn't be able to bear it if something happened to her.
Bosco took a deep breath looked once last time at his friend, then he turned and headed for the
door.
He wasn't going to let Faith pay for his screw-ups if he could help it.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
When Bosco stepped out into the hallway, Fred was the only one waiting for him.
He nodded at Fred, then looked down at his feet and tried to step around him. The last thing
he wanted right now was to make another scene in the middle of the hallway while Faith slept
peacefully inside her room.
When Bosco tried to step around him, Fred stopped him with a hand on his arm. Bosco flinched
slightly and looked down at the hand, then up at Fred. Fred removed his hand and ran it through
his sparse hair.
"I have no clue what she sees in you," Fred said quietly, then looked away from him.
Fred didn't sound angry anymore; Bosco thought he sounded a little sad. Bosco blinked in
confusion, then shrugged his shoulder.
"I'm sorry, Fred, I didn't mean to hurt her," he said softly. His voice broke on the word hurt and
he quickly cleared his throat.
Bosco didn't blame Fred for hating him. Hell if he were in Fred's shoes he would probably hate
him, too. Fred chewed on his lip he rubbed his hands together then turned back to look Bosco in
the eyes.
"If she ever gets hurt again because of you, you'll be sorry."
Bosco lifted his chin slightly to look the other man in the eyes. "I understand," he told Fred.
Then he turned to walk away; he stopped and looked back at Fred who was still looking at him.
"Fred, you don't have to worry about this ever happening again."
Then he turned before Fred could say anything and he headed for the stairs at the end of the hall.
Fred wouldn't have to worry about Faith getting hurt because of him anymore.
Bosco glanced around the empty room and sighed. When they had made it to the hospital, Doc had wheeled Faith in to the ER quickly. Kim had stayed with him. They were treating him like a child. Everyone looked at him strangely. They were all waiting for him to explode in normal Boscorelli fashion.
The doctor told him that he needed stitches in his head and said to stay until someone could get
to him. He could see Sully standing outside his door; he stood like he was guarding it. Bosco
wasn't sure if he was guarding it against someone coming in or just making sure he didn't get out.
He looked down at his hands; they had begun to shake again. He needed to get out of there.
No one had told him anything about Faith. He clung to Kim's assurances that she was going to
be fine. He knew that she was only trying to calm him down. He was trying to stay calm; he
could feel himself losing the battle.
He played the moment over and over in his head. He remembered the tight grip on his throat;
he hadn't been able to breathe and had swung at the man. When he had been released, he had
been confused and gasping for air. When he saw...no, when he *felt* another figure over him he
had automatically turned and fired the gun that he still held firmly in his hand.
Why did he do that? He knew better. You don't fire your weapon unless you see who your aiming
at. That was first year, basic stuff, he knew that. She had been trying to help. He had shot her
when she was trying to help him. How could this be happening?
The door opened and Bosco jerked his head up. Sergeant Christopher stood in the doorway
scowling at him. Bosco could see Sully standing in the door behind him, but Christopher shut
the door before Sully could follow him in.
"We've never gotten along have we, Boscorelli?"
Bosco ground his teeth together and forced his eyes to look away from him. This was all he
needed; he wasn't going to get into it with Christopher. He had already made the worst mistake
of his life today and getting into it with Christopher wasn't going to make it any better.
Bosco thought the other man was a fool; he never understood why he had been made a Sergeant.
The fact that Christopher had heard Bosco compare him to Mickey Mouse probably hadn't
helped his general attitude toward him though. Christopher took every opportunity to stick it
to Bosco.
"Nothing to say?"
Christopher took a step toward Bosco until he was standing next to the exam table; Bosco looked
up into the other man's eyes. "I knew it was just a matter of time before you screwed up royally.
But, I never dreamed that you would be so stupid. How could you shoot your own partner?"
Bosco felt a rush of anger then a stab of guilt as he looked in the other man's eyes.
A loud tap startled both men and they jumped. Sully was tapping on the window and motioning
at their Lieutenant. He was standing a few feet from him, and had a stern look on his face as he
glanced at his watch.
Christopher huffed and then turned on his heel and went to the door. He paused and then looked
back over his shoulder at Bosco. "Yokas is a good cop, sure hope she makes it," he said, then
pushed the door open and walked out.
He hadn't expected that; the statement felt like a blow to his stomach. Faith was a good cop.
But she was a great friend and partner. The last words she had said to him was telling him to
never speak to her again.
Oh god, what if he never got a chance, what if...
Bosco's head began to spin and his stomach lurched suddenly. His was going to be sick, he
couldn't stop it. He jumped from the bed and stumbled toward the sink against the wall. He
barely made it before the contents of his stomach forced their way out. After everything was up,
he couldn't stop, he stood there and continued to heave for what felt like forever. Thoughts of
Faith were tumbling around his mind and all he wanted was everything to just stop.
He felt a hand on his shoulder and one on his back. He continued to heave and his eyes began
to water. He could hear Sully's voice but he couldn't make out the words. When he finally
stopped, he sunk to the floor next to the sink, pulled up his legs, and buried his head in his knees.
He ignored the pain in his stomach and the pounding in his head as he took huge breaths and
tried to stop the tears that were threatening to start.
Sully squatted down in front of him but didn't say a word. They sat that way for a long time
until Bosco heard Sully clear his throat. "Bosco, get up."
Bosco shook his head and tightened his arms around his knees. He wanted to stay here. He just
wanted everyone to leave him alone. Why couldn't everyone just leave him alone?
"Bosco, listen to me. Are you listening?" Sully paused then continued when Bosco refused to
answer him. "This is not helping anyone. You screwed up."
The words felt like another punch. He jerked his head up and looked at the older man. He had
been prepared to see pity but not the anger that he saw in the older man's eyes.
"You don't have to tell me what happened in there. I know. You went in there determined to
grab everyone all by yourself and be the hero. But you got into trouble and the only thing that
went through your head was getting the other person first. You forgot that Faith was with you
and when she came up behind you, you fired."
Bosco opened his mouth then closed it. How did he know?
Sully sighed and sank to the floor beside Bosco.
"The partner I got assigned after Ty's dad died was an asshole. Tony was loud and obnoxious
and he didn't care about anyone else. He wanted to be the first one in and he needed to be the
hero. Sound like someone you know?"
Sully paused and studied Bosco. Bosco looked away, he couldn't meet his eyes. He focused his
stare on a trashcan near the door of the room.
"Well, one day we got this call that some dirt bag had robbed this store and grabbed this little
old lady as a hostage. We were the first ones there. Tony ignored me when I told him to wait.
He ran into the store and left me outside by myself. I heard gunfire almost immediately and I
ran in after him. He was wrestling around on the floor with this guy. The little old lady was lying
in the corner bleeding and I froze, I didn't know what to do. They were just blindly grabbing at
his gun. It was over before I could move. Tony fired his gun point-blank into the guy's face.
Blood went everywhere, before I knew it I reached for him; I wasn't thinking and apparently
neither was he. He turned the gun on me and fired. Lucky he caught me in the vest but I hated
him for it, I still do."
Sully stopped speaking. Then he struggled to his feet and stepped away from Bosco. Bosco
shuddered and looked back at Sully. He was standing a few feet away, looking down at him.
He was taking deep breaths trying to get control. All these years he had known him Bosco
had never heard him speak of any other partner except for Ty's dad.
"Why are you telling me this?"
He thinks Faith will hate me, too. Bosco closed his eyes trying to force that thought out of his
mind. Of course, Faith would hate him. He had been stupid and reckless and everything else
that she had ever said he was.
"Faith is going to hate me, too," he whispered.
"Bosco, hey look at me."
Sully's words were no longer angry, his voice was soft. Bosco opened his eyes to see him
standing over him with his hand held out.
Bosco took it and let Sully pull him to his feet. When he got to his feet Sully pulled him over
to the bed and pushed him down on it.
"I hated Tony; I couldn't get pass what he did. But, I didn't like him before that, so there was
no way I was going to care what happened to him afterward. For some reason Faith cares about
you. She needs you. You have to talk to her. You have to make this right."
"I can't. Sully what happens if ..."
Bosco couldn't bring himself to finish the thought, much less the sentence. Faith was all he had;
she was his only real friend.
The door swung open and the sound made both of them jump. A young doctor stood in the
doorway. He looked uncomfortable; he knew that he had just walked into something that he
had no business being in the middle of. Sully cleared his throat and stepped back from Bosco.
"Hey, Doc. Bosco got sick I think he opened his head up again."
Bosco hadn't realized it before but he now felt the warm blood slowly creeping down the side
of his face. The doctor nodded and walked over to Bosco. As the doctor gently probed his now
bleeding forehead, Sully took another step backwards toward the door.
"Hey, how about I go find out Faith is?"
Bosco watched him turn and go. Then he stared directly ahead at Doctor Swisher's nametag.
He tried to push the building anxiety away and convince himself that everything was going to
be fine.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Sully returned just as Doctor Swisher was finishing up. The young doctor had been rambling
about something the entire time it took him to put three stitches in his head. Bosco searched
Sully's face for news, but he couldn't read the other man's face at all.
"Okay, Officer, the stitches will need to be removed in two weeks. I don't think there was any
permanent damage done to your neck. I'm sure the marks will heal nicely."
Bosco nodded at him as he turned and left the room. "How is she?"
Sully smiled. "She's going to be fine, Bosco."
Relief flooded through Bosco. He couldn't stop the grin that came to his face. Faith was going to
be okay. He hadn't killed her. Thank you, God.
"The bullet hit her in the shoulder at the edge of her vest; it probably saved her. Doc said that
an artery was probably nicked because there was a lot of blood. They took her to surgery and got
the bullet out. Her doctor said that everything went great and they are moving her from recovery
right now. You can go see her."
The grin disappeared from his face and guilt came flooding back with a rush. She wouldn't have
had to be in surgery if it wasn't for him.
Bosco looked down at his hands.
He heard Sully sigh and take a step toward him. "Christopher is out there waiting to talk to you
again. But I convinced him to lay off until you get to see Faith. The lieutenant agreed with me."
"Why?"
"I told you earlier, you need to make this right. I know you don't want to but you got to face her."
Bosco knew he was right. He had been fighting his feelings. He was afraid and he hated being
afraid. Bosco slid off the bed and followed Sully out into the hall.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Bosco tried to ignore the stares of his fellow officers in the halls as he followed Sully to Faith's
room.
He froze when he saw Emily and Charlie sitting in a couple of chairs in the hallway. They
looked like they had been crying. An older woman was sitting between them, whispering in their
ears and stroking their hair. He had almost killed their mother; he had almost made them orphans.
Sully had stopped and was now standing in-between him and the two children. Sully pulled
Bosco past the two kids. Bosco slowed again when he saw Fred.
Faith's husband was standing in the hallway talking to Christopher and his lieutenant. He looked
up when they approached. Bosco wasn't prepared for the fury he saw in the other man's eyes,
it made him flinch and stop for the second time in a few seconds. They had never liked each
other: Bosco thought he wasn't good enough for Faith; Fred thought he was a jerk.
"Bosco, let's go. " Sully tried to get Bosco moving again.
Fred took a step toward him but Sully blocked his way.
Fred ignored Sully. "You almost killed my wife. How dare you come here?" he shouted at Bosco.
Bosco took a step back from the angry man. His stomach tightened; there was nothing to say.
What could he say? Fred was right. He had almost killed her. He had almost made the most
horrible mistake of his life. He was kidding himself. Faith would never forgive him for this.
He couldn't forgive himself, how could he even hope that she would be able to?
Sully pushed Fred back, "Calm down."
Fred threw up his hands and took a step back. Bosco could hear Emily cry out, the sound cut
into Bosco and he began to shake his head, he couldn't do this. He felt like turning and running
but his legs refused to obey him.
He had to say something, he didn't know what. "Fred..."
Fred shoved Sully aside and lunged at Bosco. He was on him so quickly that Bosco had no time
to react. Fred slammed him into the wall and began to slug him in the face. Bosco made no move
to protect him self.
You deserve it, his mind yelled at him.
Fred hit him two times before Sully and Christopher could pull him off. They wrestled him back
and held onto him.
Bosco's vision was blurred and his knees buckled as he let himself slide to the floor. He could
feel blood running from his nose and pain flooded through his already throbbing head. He heard
Charlie running to them and calling daddy and Sully telling Fred to calm down. He looked up at
Fred.
Fred was still mad, but then the dreaded pity spread across his face as well. Bosco watched him
as he shook out of Sully and Christopher's hold and picked his son up. He buried his face in his
son's hair and then turned and walked back down the hall toward Emily.
Sully bent down in front of Bosco. "Bosco? Hey, talk to me," he said quietly.
Bosco sniffed and closed his eyes. He leaned his head against the wall behind him and tried to
block out everyone around him. He was fighting the urge to get up and sprint out of the hospital.
"Officer Boscorelli, maybe this should wait," Christopher said.
"No," he whispered as he opened his eyes. "If I don't do this now," he whispered to Sully.
He left the words 'I'll never be able to live with myself' unsaid, but from the look in Sully's eyes,
Bosco knew the other man understood. Sully nodded at him then stood and took a step back.
Bosco got to his feet slowly. He clenched his fists at his sides and then stepped towards Faith's
door.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
When he stepped into the room, the first thing he saw was Faith, and she was looking at him
with one eyebrow raised at an odd angle. It caught him off guard; he hadn't expected to confront
her questioning eyes so soon.
Bosco let out a slow breath and stepped across the room until he was standing by her bed.
She was propped up in the narrow bed with two pillows behind her. Her shoulder and neck
were bandaged and she looked sleepy.
The first thing she said to him was, "What the hell happened to you?"
Bosco blinked. He didn't know what he had expected her to say but that definitely wasn't it.
Then he remembered his nose. His hand went to his nose without him thinking about it and he
shrugged. What should he tell her? He definitely wasn't going to tell her that Fred might have
broken his nose in the hallway in front of her kids.
"How do you feel?" he quietly asked.
Faith narrowed her eyes. "I got shot, Boz, how do you think I feel?"
He clamped his mouth shut for fear of saying something else stupid. He let out a breath and
closed his eyes briefly. He tried to slow his racing heartbeat, but what he was really doing was
stalling. Faith knew him better than anyone did and she called him on it.
"Bosco, it's all right," Faith whispered.
Bosco's eyes snapped open and his eyes caught hers. She had a sad smile on her face. He knew
she meant it but he couldn't let himself off the hook. He raised his hands to stop her from saying
anything else. He had a lot to say, and if she stopped him, he knew that he would never get
everything out.
"Faith, I'm sorry. You told me to stay outside and I ignored you. You're always trying to help me
and I never listen to you. I know I hide behind this attitude that I got going. For most people it
works great."
Faith opened her mouth to say something and Bosco shook his head. He took a couple of steps
away toward the window and turned his back on her. He stared at a window in the other wing
of the hospital.
He couldn't look at her. If he looked at her he would never say what he wanted to say. Never say
what he had to say. He had almost lost the chance and he was going to lay it all out on the line
now.
He cleared his throat and continued, "I guess the less people I have, the smaller the chance that
somebody is going to hurt me. But you never fall for it and that scares me. I don't have many
people in this world. Hell after what I did to Mickey and then what Hobart…"
Bosco stopped and took a deep breath; he hadn't wanted Hobart to become an issue in his life
again so soon. He was still hurt and confused by the older man's suicide, especially about the
part that he had played in the whole thing.
"I guess the number has been getting smaller lately. I don't know what I would do if I lost you,
too."
Bosco turned to look at Faith. She was crying.
"I don't think I would be able to take it. God, Faith, I'm so sorry."
Bosco felt tears flowing down his cheeks. He made no attempt to stop them, he just stood there
waiting for Faith to say something.
She didn't say anything for a long moment then she held up her hand to him. Bosco stepped
slowly forward and took it. She pulled him forward, he let her pull him down until he was
leaning over her and their faces were inches apart. She stared at him for a second.
Then she sniffed and squeezed his hand in hers.
"You will never lose me, you got that? Never," She whispered
"But.."
Why didn't she hate him? He had almost killed her today, why did she still care?
Faith shook her head to shut him up then smiled up at him. "I know you didn't mean for this to
happen but it did. Boz, you scare me all the time. I live in fear of the day when your luck runs
out. You always rush into every situation not caring about yourself. You have tostop it. You're
not the only one out there. Next time one of us might not be so lucky."
She tugged at his hand; he let himself be pulled intoher arms.
"I'm your friend, Bosco, I love you. Let me inside sometime, okay," she whispered.
Bosco took a deep breath; he was trying to control the emotions and the tears that were now
flowing freely down his face. He felt Faith shudder under his arms and he held her as tightly
as he could without putting any of his weight on her injured shoulder.
"I love you, too, Faith, and I don't deserve you."
Bosco could hear Faith chuckle.
"No, you don't."
Bosco stayed that way in her arms until she fell asleep. He carefully stood up and looked down
at her. Her eyes were closed and she was peacefully sleeping. He used his sleeve to wipe away
any evidence of stray tears, then smoothed a stray hair out of her eyes.
Faith had forgiven him. But, Bosco couldn't shake the deep fear that this would happen again.
He would rush in to someplace without thinking and next time he might not be so lucky. He had
meant what he had said to her; he wouldn't be able to bear it if something happened to her.
Bosco took a deep breath looked once last time at his friend, then he turned and headed for the
door.
He wasn't going to let Faith pay for his screw-ups if he could help it.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
When Bosco stepped out into the hallway, Fred was the only one waiting for him.
He nodded at Fred, then looked down at his feet and tried to step around him. The last thing
he wanted right now was to make another scene in the middle of the hallway while Faith slept
peacefully inside her room.
When Bosco tried to step around him, Fred stopped him with a hand on his arm. Bosco flinched
slightly and looked down at the hand, then up at Fred. Fred removed his hand and ran it through
his sparse hair.
"I have no clue what she sees in you," Fred said quietly, then looked away from him.
Fred didn't sound angry anymore; Bosco thought he sounded a little sad. Bosco blinked in
confusion, then shrugged his shoulder.
"I'm sorry, Fred, I didn't mean to hurt her," he said softly. His voice broke on the word hurt and
he quickly cleared his throat.
Bosco didn't blame Fred for hating him. Hell if he were in Fred's shoes he would probably hate
him, too. Fred chewed on his lip he rubbed his hands together then turned back to look Bosco in
the eyes.
"If she ever gets hurt again because of you, you'll be sorry."
Bosco lifted his chin slightly to look the other man in the eyes. "I understand," he told Fred.
Then he turned to walk away; he stopped and looked back at Fred who was still looking at him.
"Fred, you don't have to worry about this ever happening again."
Then he turned before Fred could say anything and he headed for the stairs at the end of the hall.
Fred wouldn't have to worry about Faith getting hurt because of him anymore.