He paced nervously in the main corridor before allowing himself up the stairs to the Headmaster's office . What he had come to say WAS important, but he had to spill all of it in one go, not forgetting anything ... as that was too painful ... and he would not get a second chance of coming back to tell the story again. Of course Dumbledore would listen to him, he always had, but he for once, would be the one who would not be able to respond the Headmaster's questions.
The potion he had prepared this morning for Voldemort might just do the trick. Of course he would take the "antidote" first. He was not that much a masochist. Especially if he took it to escape the pain of life ... but no, that was not the same kind of pain, the one he could nearly not bear anymore was not physical. He had only realised that morning that Voldemort was wrong, that he was not logic, that he was not right. That took away his only goal. He would make things right, for Lily, then nothing would be requested from him anymore. He would be free to leave.
Well, maybe Dumbledore would do him a favour and turn him to the Ministry, some Aurors would be keen on killing him.
He climbed the stairs, wondering why nobody had noticed him yet. Well, the year had just ended, only the teachers were here anymore. They would not be here too much longer though.
He paused in front of the gargoyle , the gars Goyle . Might be as stupid as well. And wondered if he could find the password.
A waste of time. He decided against it, and knocked on it instead. It was not long before it stepped aside, letting him climb to Dumbledore's office. As he approached the door, he was greated by a warm voice. "Please come in Severus."
Snape pushed the door and entered the Headmaster's office, nothing had changed since his last visit here...
Dumbledore sat at his desk, and upon his entering looked up. As their gaze met, Snape could not find words anymore, he stood right here near the door, all prestence forgotten, his soul pouring through his eyes.
"Headmaster..." he managed to croak.
"Sit down Severus." Snape headed to the chair like an automaton, still struggling for words.
Dumbledore just sat there, looking at him. His eyes were not the least twinkeling, they were as serious as that peculiar night, when he made him solemnely swear not to tell anyone Lupin's true nature, but they had also a hint of sadness, one that had not been there then. He seemed to already know why Snape had come here, but waited, ready to listen to anything the younger man might want to tell him. At that, Snape found his voice again.
"Professor Dumbledore, I have come to tell you..." No, no need of circonvolutions, this was not Voldemort nor one of those fool in the Ministry.
"I have come to warn you. I have joined the ranks of Voldemort's supporters about two years ago." He looked down at this hands, afraid of what he would see in those eyes that did not leave him. " One of us brought news of a prophecy that could have forseen his downfall... I believe you heard of it more than me." He looked up. Dumbledore just nodded, still listening, and therefore Snape was thankful, once he stopped, he might not be able to resume speaking.
"He decided to kill all the children concerned. I have brought you the list." He extended a hand to put the parchement on the table.
"Warn them, protect them. Voldemort is mad...those are Pu...they all are of wizarding parents." He fooled me he thought, why have I been listening to his promisses, I should have seen it coming all along. But you knew it, did you not? You knew Lily would be harmed anyway, remember you came to the Dark Lord searching for a vengence against her, her kind.
"I recieved the list today, but there might not be much time. Voldemort is very likely to beginn straight away. He even casted his other planned attacks aside. I have written them down here as well." He put an other piece of writing next to the list.
"I have made a mistake in joining them." His voice became pleading. " But please, please believe me and warn them..." As he looked up saying this, he stopped . Dumbledore's eyes were somber, that is true, but they were not condemning.
"I believe you."
The relief those words brought was immense. Snape sighted, thankful for Dumbledore trust.
"But why have you come to me?" he asked softly.
Snape's head jerked up again, panic making his way for his heart to his head. And in a hurry:
"I've told you Professor, they will be killed if nothing's done. Lily'll be hurt. She'll be killed. I don't want that. I still lov..." The Headmaster had put a hand in the air, to stop, or at least slow down the speech, to calm the young man. A smile had spread across his face, and the twinckle had returned in his eyes.
"I was merely asking why you did not go to the Ministry, Severus."
To be continued.
The potion he had prepared this morning for Voldemort might just do the trick. Of course he would take the "antidote" first. He was not that much a masochist. Especially if he took it to escape the pain of life ... but no, that was not the same kind of pain, the one he could nearly not bear anymore was not physical. He had only realised that morning that Voldemort was wrong, that he was not logic, that he was not right. That took away his only goal. He would make things right, for Lily, then nothing would be requested from him anymore. He would be free to leave.
Well, maybe Dumbledore would do him a favour and turn him to the Ministry, some Aurors would be keen on killing him.
He climbed the stairs, wondering why nobody had noticed him yet. Well, the year had just ended, only the teachers were here anymore. They would not be here too much longer though.
He paused in front of the gargoyle , the gars Goyle . Might be as stupid as well. And wondered if he could find the password.
A waste of time. He decided against it, and knocked on it instead. It was not long before it stepped aside, letting him climb to Dumbledore's office. As he approached the door, he was greated by a warm voice. "Please come in Severus."
Snape pushed the door and entered the Headmaster's office, nothing had changed since his last visit here...
Dumbledore sat at his desk, and upon his entering looked up. As their gaze met, Snape could not find words anymore, he stood right here near the door, all prestence forgotten, his soul pouring through his eyes.
"Headmaster..." he managed to croak.
"Sit down Severus." Snape headed to the chair like an automaton, still struggling for words.
Dumbledore just sat there, looking at him. His eyes were not the least twinkeling, they were as serious as that peculiar night, when he made him solemnely swear not to tell anyone Lupin's true nature, but they had also a hint of sadness, one that had not been there then. He seemed to already know why Snape had come here, but waited, ready to listen to anything the younger man might want to tell him. At that, Snape found his voice again.
"Professor Dumbledore, I have come to tell you..." No, no need of circonvolutions, this was not Voldemort nor one of those fool in the Ministry.
"I have come to warn you. I have joined the ranks of Voldemort's supporters about two years ago." He looked down at this hands, afraid of what he would see in those eyes that did not leave him. " One of us brought news of a prophecy that could have forseen his downfall... I believe you heard of it more than me." He looked up. Dumbledore just nodded, still listening, and therefore Snape was thankful, once he stopped, he might not be able to resume speaking.
"He decided to kill all the children concerned. I have brought you the list." He extended a hand to put the parchement on the table.
"Warn them, protect them. Voldemort is mad...those are Pu...they all are of wizarding parents." He fooled me he thought, why have I been listening to his promisses, I should have seen it coming all along. But you knew it, did you not? You knew Lily would be harmed anyway, remember you came to the Dark Lord searching for a vengence against her, her kind.
"I recieved the list today, but there might not be much time. Voldemort is very likely to beginn straight away. He even casted his other planned attacks aside. I have written them down here as well." He put an other piece of writing next to the list.
"I have made a mistake in joining them." His voice became pleading. " But please, please believe me and warn them..." As he looked up saying this, he stopped . Dumbledore's eyes were somber, that is true, but they were not condemning.
"I believe you."
The relief those words brought was immense. Snape sighted, thankful for Dumbledore trust.
"But why have you come to me?" he asked softly.
Snape's head jerked up again, panic making his way for his heart to his head. And in a hurry:
"I've told you Professor, they will be killed if nothing's done. Lily'll be hurt. She'll be killed. I don't want that. I still lov..." The Headmaster had put a hand in the air, to stop, or at least slow down the speech, to calm the young man. A smile had spread across his face, and the twinckle had returned in his eyes.
"I was merely asking why you did not go to the Ministry, Severus."
To be continued.