Chapter 3: "School Daze"



Third period. Kitty studied Evan's class schedule, trying to figure out where she was supposed to be. Ah, there! Chemistry.

She groaned. Chemistry? As if things weren't bad enough, now she had to try to control the spikes while in a room full of dangerous and possibly lethal chemicals? Great. Just great. She wondered how upset everyone would be if she were to skip Evan's chem lab. After all, the professor had said not to do anything to put themselves in danger. And this was a potentially dangerous situation. If she accidentally let loose with a spike, it could knock over some sort of deadly chemical, or a Bunsen burner or something . . . . Visions of explosions filled her head. No, she really didn't need all this extra stress.

That was it, then. She would cut class and hope everyone understood.

Kitty had just turned and started walking in the opposite direction of the chem lab when she spotted Evan coming her way. He drew up to her and grabbed her by the arm.

"Hey, you're headed the wrong way! I have chemistry next. I mean, you do." He frowned. "Well, actually, I guess we both do. Come on."

"But, Evan, do you really think that's -"

"Whoa, keep your voice down!" He glanced around furtively and pulled her off to the side of the hall. They continued their walk up the hall out of the stream of students. "I'm Kurt. You're Evan, remember?"

She sighed. "Okay, sorry. But do you really think me and chem lab is a good idea? I mean, like, combustible substances and out of control spikes?"

"Don't worry, I'll be there to watch out for you. Besides, you haven't impaled anyone yet, have you?"

"Not yet."

"Then it's not out of control. Anyway, you're not the only one with problems."

Kitty gasped. "You mean you've -?"

"No, no!" Evan shook his head and lowered his voice even more. "Luckily it takes more concentration to teleport than not to. No, it's nothing like that! Kurt had a history quiz this morning that he didn't tell me about. I think I managed to flunk it for him. Not to mention how hard it is to hold a pencil when you only have three fingers. I'd probably do as good a job writing with my toes."

"Not while you're in Kurt's body."

"No kidding." They stopped outside the classroom and he looked at her pleadingly. "Come on. I've already cut chem lab too many times this semester. Just stay calm and don't worry about the - well, you know."

Kitty peeked around the doorway and into the lab. "Is that a substitute teacher?"

Evan peered over her shoulder. "Oh, yeah, a sub! Hey, that's practically like a free period. Nothing to worry about, right?"

"I guess," Kitty said. She was still doubtful, but she followed him into the classroom and sat beside him at the nearest lab table. As soon as he was seated, Evan began fidgeting and dancing around on the chair. Kitty tried not to laugh. "What are you doing?"

He glanced around to make sure no one was listening to them. "It's the tail," he confided. "I haven't been able to find a comfortable position all day! I don't know how Kurt does it, man. Do you have any idea what sitting on a tail feels like?"

"Uh, no, can't say I do." She was going to say more, but was cut off by the sound of the bell ringing. Falling silent, she began paging through the chemistry textbook while the teacher started roll call. Kitty had just managed to convince herself that the bottles of deadly chemicals sitting on the shelves didn't pose any threat to her, when the substitute called out,

"Evan Daniels?"

Kitty continued flipping pages in the textbook, trying to locate the experiment they were scheduled to do that day.

"Evan Daniels? Is Evan here?"

Still absorbed in the hunt for the right page, Kitty didn't notice the looks Evan was giving her until he hauled off and kicked her ankle.

"Ow! What?!" She looked up and saw the whole class staring at her. A few kids snickered. "Oh! I mean, uh, here! Evan, yup, that's me!"

Several more snickers and giggles went up around the room. Kitty leaned forward and buried her head in her arms until the teacher finished roll call. Then, with her voice muffled by her arms and the table, she asked, "Is everyone still staring at me?"

Evan surveyed the room briefly. "Nope. But you might wanna cut out the valley-girl thing, okay?"

She lifted her head just enough to peek around the room. Satisfied that their classmates' attention was focused on the teacher and not her, she settled back in her chair. "Sorry. I'll try to watch that from now on."

"Good. Hey, at least you haven't spiked anyone yet."

"Yeah." Kitty felt a surge of pride at her control. It was true; she hadn't let loose with a single spike since leaving the mansion.

Just then there was a loud banging noise in the hallway. It didn't seem to faze anyone else, but Kitty jumped. She cringed as a spike shot out of her arm and embedded itself in the middle of the chalkboard at the front of the room.

"Uh-oh," Kitty whispered, sliding down in her seat.

Evan's eyes darted around the room. "It's okay. I don't think anyone saw what really happened."

The teacher whirled around and stared at the spike protruding from the chalkboard. She blinked at it a few times, then reached out and casually pulled it from the board. She then turned to the class and brandished the spike while raising an eyebrow.

"This goes a bit beyond throwing spitballs, don't you think, class?"



X X X X X X X



Lunchtime. So far, so good.

Rogue slammed Scott's locker shut and leaned against it, grateful for the break from class. Until that day, she'd had no idea how much homework Scott's teachers assigned. Her arms ached from carrying the books around all morning.

Before heading off to the cafeteria for lunch, Rogue realized she needed to use the bathroom. She fought her way into the mob of students streaming in that direction and continued on straight when everyone else turned left. The hall outside the restrooms was virtually deserted, due to the stampede toward the lunchroom. Only a few stragglers remained in the hall.

Unfortunately, two of the stragglers happened to be Lance Alvers and Todd Tolensky. Rogue tried to ignore them as she brushed by. Not really giving it any thought, she walked over to the restroom she was used to using. She stopped dead in her tracks when she heard a burst of laughter behind her.

"Hey, Summers," Lance called. "Do you need to have your eye examined, or are you just confirming what we've always known?"

"Yeah, that's the girls' room, yo," Toad added helpfully.

Oh, right. Rogue fought the urge to slap her forehead. Disgusted that she'd forgotten such a basic thing, she turned on her heel and stalked over to the boys' room. The sound of laughter followed her through the door, only silencing when the door wheezed shut.

Once inside, she gazed around the restroom in horror. Either the janitor had taken the month off, or teenage boys were filthy animals with a real talent for destruction. Her educated guess was the latter.

Kicking balled-up paper towels out of her way, she managed to clear a path to the nearest stall. As she reached for the stall door, she discovered several thick streaks of slime dripping from it. She quickly pulled her hand back and wrinkled her nose. Well, if Lance and Toad had just been in the room, that certainly explained why it now resembled a disaster site. Throwing another glance around the room, Rogue shook her head and muttered, "I don't think I really want to know."

Whatever the boys had done to destroy the bathroom, they'd sure been thorough. All the stall doors were slimed so well that Rogue couldn't see any safe spot to touch. Instead, she raised one foot and carefully nudged the door open with her toe. Luckily, it appeared Toad had only slimed the outside of the stalls.

When she was finished at the toilet (and this time it hadn't been so easy not to "peek"), she made her way through the battlefield of paper towels to reach the sink. She washed her hands and turned to the paper towel dispenser, which she quickly discovered was empty. Naturally. By the look of things, Toad and Lance had redistributed the entire contents of the dispenser all around the room. Rogue sighed and leaned over to dry her hands on the legs of Scott's pants.

As she straightened up, she caught sight of Scott's face in an unslimed corner of the mirror. After a quick glance around to make sure she was still alone, Rogue leaned forward until she was almost nose-to-nose with Scott's reflection. She stared into the mirror, transfixed. This was the closest she'd ever seen Scott. She turned her head in all directions, drinking in every detail of Scott's face.

Okay, so maybe this stupid situation did have its perks.

Rogue faced the mirror head-on and licked her lips nervously, fighting an inner battle. Finally she shrugged. Oh, why not? Just to hear what it would sound like coming from him. She stared Scott's reflection straight in the eyes (well, straight in the shades) and whispered, "I love you, Rogue. You're amazing. I can't live without you."

"What are you doing?"

Rogue jumped at the second voice and spun around to see Evan standing in the doorway. No, she corrected herself, not Evan. It was really Kitty. Kitty, standing just inside the bathroom door, staring at Rogue with a half-amused, half-shocked look on her face.

"I'm not doing anything. I was just, uh, checking my hair. Yeah. You know how Scott is about his hair." Rogue tried not to groan. How embarrassing! She couldn't believe she'd been so involved in ogling Scott's reflection that she hadn't heard the door open. At least it had only been Kitty and not . . . well, she shuddered to think who else could have walked in.

"Your hair. Uh-huh. Then, like, why are you blushing?"

"Am I blushing?" Rogue twisted around to the mirror, but through the ruby shades, everything looked like it was blushing.

"You are. Trust me." Trying not to laugh, Kitty looked around the bathroom and immediately scrunched up her face. "So this is the boys' room. Ew. I mean, I knew boys were slobs, but this . . ."

"This," Rogue informed her, "is courtesy of Lance and Toad. They were also kind enough to point out that I almost walked into the girls' room," she added dryly.

"You did? Gee, I figured that one out this morning."

"Good for you." Rogue shook her head and walked to the door. "Did you come in here to do something other than make fun of me?"

Kitty nodded. "Well, yeah, but now that I've seen the place, I think I'll hold it til we get back to the Institute. Ew."

"I know what you mean."

They exited the restroom and almost bumped into Lance and Toad, who were doubled over laughing about something. Rogue shoved past them, but Kitty hung back for a moment and smiled at Lance.

"Hi, Lance!"

He stopped laughing and looked up suspiciously. "Yeah? What do you want, Daniels?"

"Oh." Kitty blushed. "Uh, nevermind. I thought I was someone else. Forget it."

"Huh?"

"Nothing. Forget it."

"Forget what? What're you talking about?"

Even though she didn't really feel like starting anything with any members of the Brotherhood, Rogue figured she'd better rescue Kitty before Lance could ask any more questions. Luckily, he was easily distracted. "Hey, Alvers, some redecorating job you guys did in the bathroom."

The boys started laughing again. "It needed it. You should've seen it before. Boring!"

"Yeah, and you oughtta see what we did to the chem lab, yo!"

Lance scowled. "Shut up, Toad. Remember who we're talking to. The little losers are probably gonna run and tell on us now."

"Like we'd need to. I'm sure the streaks of slime won't give Principal Kelly any idea who did it," Rogue shot back.

Things could have gotten out of control then if Kitty hadn't spotted Kurt walking down the hall at that moment. It was an odd sensation watching her own body walk toward her, but that wasn't what caused her jaw to drop.

He was eating a double cheeseburger.

Kitty elbowed Rogue and pointed. "Look at that," she hissed. "I don't believe it! And after what we talked about this morning, too!"

Realizing exactly whom it was they were talking about, Lance grinned and spun around to wave. "Hi, Kitty!"

Toad snorted. "Hi, Kitty," he mimicked in a ridiculous falsetto. He ducked as Lance's hand flew toward his head. "Hey!"

Ignoring them, the real Kitty ran down the hall toward Kurt. "Oh, Kitty," she called. "Drop that burger! You're a vegetarian, remember?"

Toad and Lance watched in bewilderment as Scott and Evan chased Kitty down the hall, trying to knock the burger out of her hands. Lance drew his eyebrows together in confusion. So Kitty was eating a burger. So what? He was glad. In his opinion, vegetarians were kind of creepy.

Toad narrowed his eyes at the X-Men and shook his head. "Is it just my imagination, yo, or are the X-geeks getting weirder?"



X X X X X X X



The lunchroom was packed. Everywhere Scott looked, students swarmed. Every table was completely full. Someone had started a food-fight a few minutes earlier, so now the room was filled with flying peas, chicken casserole, and tuna surprise. A cup of applesauce was launched in his direction, and he ducked just in time to avoid an applesauce shampoo.

"Forget this," he muttered. It was probably safer outside. Certainly there would be more places to run should anyone else decide to fire their dessert his way. He wasn't entirely sure how Jean would react to a chocolate pudding treatment in her hair, but he was willing to bet she wouldn't be happy about it.

Yes, better to eat lunch outside, out of the line of fire.

He made his way outside and promptly ran head-on into several members of the football team. Expecting trouble, he groaned to himself. Great, he reflected, this day just keeps getting better and better.

Instead of starting trouble, as he might have done had he realized it was really Scott Summers who had just bumped into him, Duncan stopped and smiled. "Hi, Jean. How's it going?"

Oh, wonderful. Even worse than being hit by a jock was being hit on by a jock. Scott quickly revised his previous estimation of how bad the day could get.

Duncan was still waiting for "Jean" to say something. Scott shrugged and began edging away. "Oh, hey Duncan. I was just on my way over there. Lunch, you know. So, uh, bye Duncan."

"Whoa, wait a minute! Why don't we have lunch together? I know this nice little area on the other end of the campus where we can be alone . . ."

Alone? With Duncan? "Uh, I've really got to go meet my friends for lunch. Yeah. Sorry." Scott turned and took off at a power-walk, trying not to run. A few hoots and snickers from the rest of the football team reached his ears and he did his best to ignore them. He had almost reached the safety of the outside lunch tables, just around the corner of the building, when he felt a hand on his arm. His heart sank as he turned and looked up into Duncan's face.

"What's the hurry, Jean?" Duncan's expression was still friendly, but confused.

"Oh, I'm just really hungry, I guess." Scott tried not to roll his eyes. How was he supposed to get through this without ruining Jean's social life? Of course, if it were up to him, he'd erase this idiot show-off from Jean's social calendar altogether . . .

"So, are you coming to the game tonight? I'm starting." Duncan wiggled his eyebrows as if his starting the game was the most exciting thing that could happen in Jean's life.

"Of course you are." Scott smiled sweetly. "Actually, I can't come. I'm busy."

"Oh." Duncan started to frown, then recovered and shrugged. He leaned against the side of the building and subtly flexed his biceps in what he probably thought was a casual show of manliness. "Well, what are you doing tomorrow after school?"

"Uh . . ." With any luck, by tomorrow he'd be back in his own body and wouldn't have to worry about Duncan making a move on him. Still, just in case . . . "Soccer practice. Sorry."

"And after that?"

"Homework. Lots and lots of homework."

"What about Friday?"

"Washing my hair. And more homework. And chores. Lots of chores."

"Okay." Duncan nodded and pushed himself off the wall. "Well, give me a call if something opens up for you. See you later."

"Bye!" Scott called after him. "Have a nice life," he added under his breath.

"What was that all about?" a voice asked from behind him.

Taking a deep breath, Scott forced the guilty look from his face and turned to face Jean. "Hi there, Rogue. How's your day been so far?"

"Not too bad, actually." Jean gave him a tolerant look. "What were you and Duncan talking about?"

Scott felt his face fall. "Oh, you saw that, huh?"

"Yes. I saw, but I didn't hear. What were you talking about?"

"The weather. It's been nice lately, don't you think?"

"Beautiful." Jean tried not to sigh. A couple of kids passed by within earshot, so she smiled sweetly at Scott and said, "Come on, Jean, I'm your friend. You can tell me what Duncan said."

Scott wrestled with himself for a moment, but there was really no question about it. His conscience won after a short fight. "Oh, fine. I think he was asking me out. I put him off for now, but you might want to give him a call when we get this thing straightened out."

Something about Scott's words struck Jean as funny. Fighting to keep a straight face, she asked, "So Duncan asked you out, did he?"

"Yes. It was a dream come true. I could hardly contain myself."

"How often do you do that?"

"Do what?"

"Roll your eyes like that. Under normal conditions we can't tell, but now you're exposed."

"Are you making fun of me?"

"Maybe just a little."

"Great." As much as he tried to fight it, Scott couldn't help but laugh. He motioned around the corner, meaning that they should go find a place to eat. Jean nodded, and they had just taken their first steps when Kurt came flying around the corner and crashed into them.

"Help! Hide me!"

"What's wrong?" Jean asked, alarmed.

"Uh . . . oh, nothing." Kurt quickly hid his hands behind his back. He grinned sheepishly. "Nevermind. Just pretend you never saw me, okay?"

"What - ?" Before Scott could finish his question, Kurt took off running again.

At that moment, Kitty came tearing around the side of the building. She screeched to a halt an inch away from running into Scott and Jean. Bouncing up and down, trying to see past them, she demanded, "All right, where did he go?"

"You mean, uh, Kitty?" Scott asked, directing pointed glances at the students who were passing by. A few of the students were starting to gaze back at the trio with looks usually reserved for those with mental instabilities.

Kitty took the hint. "Yes, I mean Kitty. Kitty," she emphasized her own name with irritation and sarcasm, "is eating a double cheeseburger Gut-Bomb. Kitty seems to have forgotten she is a vegetarian. But even if Kitty weren't a vegetarian, she still would not be wolfing down something which contains three times the recommended daily intake of fat grams! I think Kitty has just made a very big mistake!"

"And you're going to show her the light?" Scott asked.

"Oh yeah, she'll see lights, all right! Lots of them, dancing around her head!" Kitty stamped her foot. "Now which way did she go?"

"That way." Scott pointed in the opposite direction of the way Kurt had gone.

"Thank you." Kitty ran off on the wild goose chase without a second thought.

Jean shook her head. "Well, I suppose we should go find a place to eat. Shall we?"

"You got it."

As Scott and Jean walked away together, a shadow moved under the outside staircase. A second later, Lance and Toad emerged from the hiding place. They'd been crouched under the stairs since fleeing the food-fight they'd started, and from their position, they had heard the entire exchange between the X-Men. Most of it had made no sense to them.

Lance frowned. "What does Daniels care if Kitty eats a burger? And since when does Red turn down a date with a football jock? Something's going on here, Toad."

Toad nodded. "Yup, I told ya. They are definitely getting weirder!"





to be continued . . .