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Summary: Things are going well for a lot of the West Wing staff. Toby gets credited for sexual acts he didn't preform, Donna gets lost, Leo gets a pointless assignment, Bartlet gets a total chew out, and Josh gets caught lip syncing.
Chapter Two: Rough Times
The end of the week apporached sooner than most hoped, and by Thursday night, random instructions were being issued out.
"Yeah, that drawer with the bouncy balls...that's not to be touched," Toby grumbled to Sam, who was getting used to Toby's cluttered office.
"...and THIS button will get the caller directly to Josh...er Toby," Donna instructed, holding one of her office phones in her hand and pointing to various buttons, educating an amazed Bartlet.
"If I come in Monday morning and that fish is bellyside up in that bowl," CJ threatened, putting on her coat and nodding towards Gail," I swear, Joshua, you WILL be right behind it."
"The password to enter this part of the computer is 'OpenSesameX'," Charlie explained, clicking on an icon on is computer. Leo raised an eyebrow. "It was Mrs. Landingham's idea," Charlie muttered, blushing.
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Friday, 5:27A.M.
"Yes, Ms. President?" CJ asked, walking into the Oval Office.
"CJ, you can stop all of that right now," Donna said, standing up quickly from her seat behind the desk.
"Alright, it felt odd calling you that anyway," CJ admitted.
"Yeah, well, you see..I'm...kinda lost," Donna said slowly.
"So you call in me to help you?" CJ asked.
"You're my Chief of Staff," Donna said.
"You said we aren't doing that in here," CJ pointed out.
"I know, I...I was just making an excuse," Donna confessed.
"Of course," CJ said, understanding.
There was an akward pause for a moment, then CJ asked, "Did he give you a schedule?"
"Yeah, THAT'S where I am lost," Donna said, picking up the schedule Bartlet had arranged for her.
"How so?" CJ questioned, taking the sheet of paper and scanning through it.
"Well there haven't been any Chinese satellites hurtling towards Earth, or any missing submaries, or and deady diseases rapidly spreading throughout the country," Donna explained.
"And you WANT all of this to happen?" CJ asked, peering at Donna over the rim of her glasses.
"Well, no, but.."
"Its also 5:30 in the morning," CJ pointed out, checking her watch.
Donna stared at her,"Are you telling me worldwide disasters are on a schedule?"
"No, I'm saying *exactly* twelve hours from now you'll be calling me back into this office as a shoulder to cry on," CJ said plainly.
Donna thanked her glumily and "dismissed" her.
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6:05AM
"Toby Ziegler's office," Bartlet said, answering the phone.
"Oh, I'm sorry I was trying to reach Josh Lyman's office," the female on the other line said.
"That would be this one," Bartlet said cheerily.
"But you just --"
"Please hold!" Bartlet interjected, agian cheerily. He pressed the "hold call" button and looked at the other buttons blankly. After searching for the button to get the caller to Toby in vain, he gave up and stormed away to tell Toby in person.
He passed up one of Josh's assistents who asked," Need another phone lesson, Mr. President?"
Bartlet spun around, "My name is DONNA...er...Jed!" he declared. He then opened the door to the office and before he could get a word out of his mouth, Toby, not looking up from his papers, muttered, "37.5."
Bartlet stared at him. Toby, again not looking up, said again," It took 37.5 seconds from the time that phone rang to you getting to me."
He sounded genuinely dissapointed and disgusted.
"Well, I couldn't find--" Bartlet began to explain.
Toby finally threw the papers down roughly and gave him a 'you must think I am stupid look' and asked him,"Do you know how many assistants I have had that give me that excuse?"
Bartlet guessed there have been a lot, since Toby had so much knowledge in the field of excuses. Toby countered,"No, actually, there haven't been that many at all."
Bartlet stood there for a minute, not knowing what he should do next.
"Line 3," he mumbled, and turned to leave.
"You know, if I were any other Deputy Chief of Staff I'd have your ass on the street," Toby grumbled.
Bartlet continued on out the door, saying nothing.
Toby smiled to himself over his victory and picked up the phone.
"Hey, J," Amy said on the other line.
"Oh, this isn't--" Toby began, but Amy, being Amy, cut in.
"That Tahiti at home idea was great. You were not to bad yourself, come to think of it," Amy said flirtasiously.
Toby blinked several times, not sure on how to break it to her he wasn't Josh without totally embarassing her. Once again, before he had a chance to reply, Amy giggled,"I'm glad you liked my new bikinis. Too bad I didn't keep them on long enough to show off more."
Toby opened and closed his mouth several times, but no sound came out.
"I know its really early, but I wanted to make sure I got through to you, in person. I think I left some of my...stuff...at your apartment. Can I stop by to get it sometime?" Amy asked.
Toby figured he had to answer to this question, so he put on his best Josh voice and said cooly,"Yeah...how about tomorrow?"
"Ok," Amy said casually,"Then I can show you my other pairs."
Toby winced and said,"That'd be-great."
Amy said she had to go and that she'd talk to him later. Toby hung up gratefully, and got up to go tell what to be prepared for the next day.
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6:45AM
Donna's voice came over the intercome to Leo, who was staring at the Password Box on the computer blankly.
"Leo, I know its pretty early, but can you find out what's for lunch in the Mess Hall?" Donna's voice crackled over the speaker.
Leo tore his eyes away from the staring contest he was having with the computer screen after forgetting the password and answered Donna,"Ma'am, usually the president eats lunch somewhere else...like the residence."
Donna made a noise and said,"Leo, in case you haven't noticed, this really isn't usually."
Leo nodded to himself, agreeing,"I know, ma'am."
There was a small pause. "Please, Leo?" Donna begged.
Leo made a small smile and rolled his eyes,"Of course, ma'am."
CJ walked into the room just as Donna's voice on the speaker said,"Ohhhh, thank you Leo! You are SUCH a sweetheart sometimes!"
Leo looked down, blushing as CJ threw him a look of biwilderment.
"Do you know how TOTALLY INAPPROPRIATE that would have been if that would have been President Bartlet saying that?" CJ teased.
Leo's look alone could have reprimended CJ for even thinking such things.
CJ remained unfased,"Watch it, mon amor, I am in charge today."
"Will I load the briefings on you on Monday," Leo grumbled threatingly.
"According to President Bartlet's rules meeting last night, you cannot punish anyone not superior to you for anything they do today," CJ stated happily.
"Yeah well he'll be taking all of that bull back when Toby gets through with him," Leo said.
"Don't you have somewhere to go?" CJ asked, raising an eyebrow.
"Yeah, I have my first assignment as Personal Assistant," he said, rolling his eyes again. "Find the lunch menu."
He stalked out of the room and left CJ to try to remember what she was there for in the first place. CJ gave up guessing and turned away to Toby's (Josh's) office.
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7:00AM
Josh was fondling with CJ's radio when Carol walked in and put a boatload of papers on CJ's desk.
"How the hell do you turn this thing on?" Josh asked, looking over his shoulder.
Carol sighed heavily, walked over, and pointed to a large red knob on the side of the radio.
"Oh...right," Josh mumbled, feeling rather stupid. Carol rolled her eyes and turned to leave, advicing to her *boss*,"You might want to read those papers, they're for your morning briefing."
"I'll get to it," Josh said distractedly, glancing at the papers briefly and tuning the radio to his favorite station. "Eye of The Tiger" was playing so Josh closed the door and started to lip sync to it. His preformance wasn't as great or classic as a CJ preformance, but he, forgetting to close the blinds to the window to the outer office, still drew quite an audience of secrataries and assistants.
As Josh ended his performance, he opened his eyes to see the gawking faces in the window. He gaped in utter horror for a moment and then lunged at the window to draw the blinds. Laughter echoed throughout the outer office as the spectators turned back to answering phones and taking memos.
Josh turned the radio off and brooded in his chair for a moment before picking up the stack of notes.
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
Summary: Things are going well for a lot of the West Wing staff. Toby gets credited for sexual acts he didn't preform, Donna gets lost, Leo gets a pointless assignment, Bartlet gets a total chew out, and Josh gets caught lip syncing.
Chapter Two: Rough Times
The end of the week apporached sooner than most hoped, and by Thursday night, random instructions were being issued out.
"Yeah, that drawer with the bouncy balls...that's not to be touched," Toby grumbled to Sam, who was getting used to Toby's cluttered office.
"...and THIS button will get the caller directly to Josh...er Toby," Donna instructed, holding one of her office phones in her hand and pointing to various buttons, educating an amazed Bartlet.
"If I come in Monday morning and that fish is bellyside up in that bowl," CJ threatened, putting on her coat and nodding towards Gail," I swear, Joshua, you WILL be right behind it."
"The password to enter this part of the computer is 'OpenSesameX'," Charlie explained, clicking on an icon on is computer. Leo raised an eyebrow. "It was Mrs. Landingham's idea," Charlie muttered, blushing.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Friday, 5:27A.M.
"Yes, Ms. President?" CJ asked, walking into the Oval Office.
"CJ, you can stop all of that right now," Donna said, standing up quickly from her seat behind the desk.
"Alright, it felt odd calling you that anyway," CJ admitted.
"Yeah, well, you see..I'm...kinda lost," Donna said slowly.
"So you call in me to help you?" CJ asked.
"You're my Chief of Staff," Donna said.
"You said we aren't doing that in here," CJ pointed out.
"I know, I...I was just making an excuse," Donna confessed.
"Of course," CJ said, understanding.
There was an akward pause for a moment, then CJ asked, "Did he give you a schedule?"
"Yeah, THAT'S where I am lost," Donna said, picking up the schedule Bartlet had arranged for her.
"How so?" CJ questioned, taking the sheet of paper and scanning through it.
"Well there haven't been any Chinese satellites hurtling towards Earth, or any missing submaries, or and deady diseases rapidly spreading throughout the country," Donna explained.
"And you WANT all of this to happen?" CJ asked, peering at Donna over the rim of her glasses.
"Well, no, but.."
"Its also 5:30 in the morning," CJ pointed out, checking her watch.
Donna stared at her,"Are you telling me worldwide disasters are on a schedule?"
"No, I'm saying *exactly* twelve hours from now you'll be calling me back into this office as a shoulder to cry on," CJ said plainly.
Donna thanked her glumily and "dismissed" her.
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
6:05AM
"Toby Ziegler's office," Bartlet said, answering the phone.
"Oh, I'm sorry I was trying to reach Josh Lyman's office," the female on the other line said.
"That would be this one," Bartlet said cheerily.
"But you just --"
"Please hold!" Bartlet interjected, agian cheerily. He pressed the "hold call" button and looked at the other buttons blankly. After searching for the button to get the caller to Toby in vain, he gave up and stormed away to tell Toby in person.
He passed up one of Josh's assistents who asked," Need another phone lesson, Mr. President?"
Bartlet spun around, "My name is DONNA...er...Jed!" he declared. He then opened the door to the office and before he could get a word out of his mouth, Toby, not looking up from his papers, muttered, "37.5."
Bartlet stared at him. Toby, again not looking up, said again," It took 37.5 seconds from the time that phone rang to you getting to me."
He sounded genuinely dissapointed and disgusted.
"Well, I couldn't find--" Bartlet began to explain.
Toby finally threw the papers down roughly and gave him a 'you must think I am stupid look' and asked him,"Do you know how many assistants I have had that give me that excuse?"
Bartlet guessed there have been a lot, since Toby had so much knowledge in the field of excuses. Toby countered,"No, actually, there haven't been that many at all."
Bartlet stood there for a minute, not knowing what he should do next.
"Line 3," he mumbled, and turned to leave.
"You know, if I were any other Deputy Chief of Staff I'd have your ass on the street," Toby grumbled.
Bartlet continued on out the door, saying nothing.
Toby smiled to himself over his victory and picked up the phone.
"Hey, J," Amy said on the other line.
"Oh, this isn't--" Toby began, but Amy, being Amy, cut in.
"That Tahiti at home idea was great. You were not to bad yourself, come to think of it," Amy said flirtasiously.
Toby blinked several times, not sure on how to break it to her he wasn't Josh without totally embarassing her. Once again, before he had a chance to reply, Amy giggled,"I'm glad you liked my new bikinis. Too bad I didn't keep them on long enough to show off more."
Toby opened and closed his mouth several times, but no sound came out.
"I know its really early, but I wanted to make sure I got through to you, in person. I think I left some of my...stuff...at your apartment. Can I stop by to get it sometime?" Amy asked.
Toby figured he had to answer to this question, so he put on his best Josh voice and said cooly,"Yeah...how about tomorrow?"
"Ok," Amy said casually,"Then I can show you my other pairs."
Toby winced and said,"That'd be-great."
Amy said she had to go and that she'd talk to him later. Toby hung up gratefully, and got up to go tell what to be prepared for the next day.
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
6:45AM
Donna's voice came over the intercome to Leo, who was staring at the Password Box on the computer blankly.
"Leo, I know its pretty early, but can you find out what's for lunch in the Mess Hall?" Donna's voice crackled over the speaker.
Leo tore his eyes away from the staring contest he was having with the computer screen after forgetting the password and answered Donna,"Ma'am, usually the president eats lunch somewhere else...like the residence."
Donna made a noise and said,"Leo, in case you haven't noticed, this really isn't usually."
Leo nodded to himself, agreeing,"I know, ma'am."
There was a small pause. "Please, Leo?" Donna begged.
Leo made a small smile and rolled his eyes,"Of course, ma'am."
CJ walked into the room just as Donna's voice on the speaker said,"Ohhhh, thank you Leo! You are SUCH a sweetheart sometimes!"
Leo looked down, blushing as CJ threw him a look of biwilderment.
"Do you know how TOTALLY INAPPROPRIATE that would have been if that would have been President Bartlet saying that?" CJ teased.
Leo's look alone could have reprimended CJ for even thinking such things.
CJ remained unfased,"Watch it, mon amor, I am in charge today."
"Will I load the briefings on you on Monday," Leo grumbled threatingly.
"According to President Bartlet's rules meeting last night, you cannot punish anyone not superior to you for anything they do today," CJ stated happily.
"Yeah well he'll be taking all of that bull back when Toby gets through with him," Leo said.
"Don't you have somewhere to go?" CJ asked, raising an eyebrow.
"Yeah, I have my first assignment as Personal Assistant," he said, rolling his eyes again. "Find the lunch menu."
He stalked out of the room and left CJ to try to remember what she was there for in the first place. CJ gave up guessing and turned away to Toby's (Josh's) office.
*~*~*~*~*~*~~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
7:00AM
Josh was fondling with CJ's radio when Carol walked in and put a boatload of papers on CJ's desk.
"How the hell do you turn this thing on?" Josh asked, looking over his shoulder.
Carol sighed heavily, walked over, and pointed to a large red knob on the side of the radio.
"Oh...right," Josh mumbled, feeling rather stupid. Carol rolled her eyes and turned to leave, advicing to her *boss*,"You might want to read those papers, they're for your morning briefing."
"I'll get to it," Josh said distractedly, glancing at the papers briefly and tuning the radio to his favorite station. "Eye of The Tiger" was playing so Josh closed the door and started to lip sync to it. His preformance wasn't as great or classic as a CJ preformance, but he, forgetting to close the blinds to the window to the outer office, still drew quite an audience of secrataries and assistants.
As Josh ended his performance, he opened his eyes to see the gawking faces in the window. He gaped in utter horror for a moment and then lunged at the window to draw the blinds. Laughter echoed throughout the outer office as the spectators turned back to answering phones and taking memos.
Josh turned the radio off and brooded in his chair for a moment before picking up the stack of notes.
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