Chapter 6: Lost
As Hitomi's words sank in Van's eyes filled with sadness. She doesn't love me anymore. He swallowed hard. A few words were all it took to make Van feel like his world had shattered around him. The person he loved most in the world, his hopes and his dreams were all snatched away from him in a single moment. He stood up, backing away from Hitomi.
At first, the tawny-haired girl didn't even realize the meaning of the cruel words that had just slipped out of her mouth. She hadn't really said them, had she? Van was staring at her, crushed. Hitomi was confused. Where had that destructive little sentence come from? It wasn't her!
"Van, I…" He turned his back to her. She didn't know what to say. How could she tell Van she loved him when she had just contradicted that statement? There was no way of explaining to him what happened because she didn't even know herself.
"I didn't mean that!" Hitomi blurted out in a rush. She saw Van's shoulders stiffen. He turned his head for a second to look at her. His eyes held a swirl of painful emotions. Hitomi looked back at him helplessly. Then he lowered his eyes, took a deep breath and walked away.
Hitomi felt tears welling up in her green eyes, and she let them slide down her cheeks. She sank back down into the tall field grass, curling up and hugging her knees. She was cold; the last rays of the setting sun had since disappeared and there was a frigid breeze in the air that sent a chill down her spine. She feebly wondered if Van would come back for her. A few raindrops beat down upon her aching head as she stared up at the darkening sky. Everything is going wrong. Was it really worth staying on Gaia? She wondered sadly how her friends and family back home were doing.
Van walked on. He didn't care that he was leaving Hitomi all alone in a place strange to her. She had led him on, and he had been so stupid as to believe she actually loved him. What had he been thinking?
As he neared the edge of the field and the first few trees of the thick woods, Van decided he had to go back. He couldn't just leave Hitomi, no matter how much she had hurt him. Reluctantly, he turned around and began to walk briskly back to the spot where he and Hitomi had landed a few hours ago. Upon reaching his destination, he was surprised to find that the girl was not there. Where could she have wandered off to? Van thought. She didn't even know her way back to the castle.
"Hitomi?" he called. No response. Van frantically started cutting his way through the tall blades of grass. Although it had sunk in that she didn't feel the same way, the ebony-haired king realized he would never stop caring for her. He had to find her before she ran away for good, or, he cringed at the thought, returned to her own world.
Hitomi hurried through the woods, trying in vain to retrace her and Merle's steps from their hike earlier that day. The rain created a muddy river out of the forest floor, making it almost impossible to walk. The sludge was up to her ankles and she had to slowly wade through it. Hitomi grimaced. She didn't even know if this was the right way back to the castle! Ugh! She thought. Why did this have to happen?!
After almost an hour of scouring the field and the surrounding forest, Van gave up his search. In an instant, his beautiful wings burst out from his back, causing a flurry of feathers to fall to the wet, sloppy ground. He rose high in the air, flying as fast as he could back to his castle.
When he finally fell through the door, exhausted from his difficult flight through the violent storm, Merle immediately pounced on him.
"Lord Van! Where have you been? I thought you would be back hours ago! And where's Hitomi?"
Van coughed and wiped his forehead with the back of his hand. "I don't know."
"What do you mean, you don't know? Didn't you take her to the field?"
"Yes, but… we got separated. I looked all over for her, but with no luck."
Merle frowned. "Don't worry. I'll get a search party out for her. She couldn't have gone too far!" The catgirl tried to be cheerful for Van, but secretly prayed Hitomi would get back safely- it was a really nasty storm out there. "And as for you," she continued, "go up to your room and get some dry clothes on. You don't want to catch a cold!"
Van smiled at Merle's optimism, but waited until she had left the hall to plunk down on the stairs leading up to his bedroom. He didn't want to just sit around and do nothing. What if Hitomi wasn't found? She was probably wandering through the gloomy forest, freezing to death. Van stood up. There was nothing that could stop him once he'd made a decision, and he knew he had to find Hitomi right away. The painful words she had uttered in the field nagged at the back of his mind, but he shoved them away. He dashed through the door, ready to face the storm.
***
The party in Fanelia's ballroom was winding down, and most of the guests were getting ready to leave. Van had spent almost the whole time with Adara, and he had to admit he had a lot of fun. He hadn't felt this good in a long time. She was the only person who had actually managed to make him forget Hitomi, or at least make the memories less painful for him. He hadn't told Adara about Hitomi, however. Van didn't want to share his experience with someone he had just met.
"Van?" Adara said, bringing him back to reality. "I have to leave soon… my father's right over there, talking to your other advisors."
"You do?" Van said, disappointed. "Well.. come outside with me, we'll wait for him there."
Adara gave Van that mischievous smile of hers, her blue-green eyes twinkling. He grinned and grabbed her hand, dragging her out to a low balcony with steps leading down to the front courtyard of the castle, where other guests were departing.
They sat down on the balcony ledge, looking out at the village, lit up by candles in house windows. Adara turned towards Van. He was still gazing out into the night, with that faraway look his eyes so often held.
Van could feel Adara's eyes on him. He looked at her, and was once again met with her stunning features. She was really beautiful; there was something about her that wouldn't allow his eyes to stray from hers. All other thoughts disappeared from Van's mind. He remained transfixed by this girl, and he could feel warmth coming from her, as if she felt content to be here with him. Adara glanced down, moving slightly closer to Van. He suddenly felt the desperate need for comfort, and longed to be held in her arms. He wanted more than anything to feel what he had felt while holding Hitomi.
Adara lifted her eyes. Van was looking at her with a longing she hadn't noticed before. Slowly, she wrapped her arms around his neck and brought herself even closer to him. He didn't resist. Her lips inched towards his, and she closed her eyes. He stared at this pretty face, this girl who wanted to be with him. He'd have to be crazy to turn her down. He put his arms around her and pulled her closer. Hastily, he rested his head over her shoulder in a tight hug, then released her. Her arms fell from his neck, a startled look on her face that quickly morphed into hurt. Adara swallowed hard, looking at her feet.
"I'm sorry, Adara," said Van with difficulty. "It was nice spending time with you tonight."
The bronze-skinned girl shook her head. "It's okay. I get it… your majesty."
Van flinched. If she thought that was the reason.. let her think that way. He didn't want to pain her with the story of his real love, and he couldn't tell her that Hitomi is the girl he really wanted to kiss. He watched Adara turn and fly down the steps to join her father on his way home.
***
Hitomi had been walking for almost two hours. She was exhausted and soaking through and through. The worst part was she was still in the woods; there seemed to be no end to them. Her shoes and socks were caked with mud, and she was freezing cold. A tear rolled down her cheek as she thought about what happened with Van earlier, and how he probably didn't care if she got lost and never came back. She hated whatever, or whoever it was that caused that lie to spring out of her mouth. If that hadn't happened, she and Van would be together and happy. There's always something that ruins our chance, she thought miserably.
Van ran through the streets of Fanelia to the farther edge of the forest. This time, he wouldn't stop until he found Hitomi. He entered muddy mess the woods had become since the rain had started beating down. "Hitomi?" he called for the millionth time that day. "Hitomi!" All he could do was walk around aimlessly- he had no idea which direction she'd gone.
Twenty minutes later, Hitomi was still walking alone. She was tempted to rest, but she would have to sit in a deep puddle of mud in order to do so. She settled on leaning against a tree. She couldn't make the horrible feeling in her heart go away. If Van would ever look at her again, how could she undo the mess made of their relationship?
Just then, Hitomi noticed a flash of red go by through some distant trees. Could it be…? Would Van actually come looking for her after what she'd said? She sloshed over the mud as fast as she could, and shouting, "Van?!"
Van stopped. He thought he'd heard Hitomi a moment ago, calling his name. He stopped, and hopefully proceeded in the direction of the call.
"Hitomi? Is that you?"
"Van!" She felt flooded with relief, and disbelief that he had come for her.
Van ran up to Hitomi, and stopped right in front of her. Hitomi wanted to laugh at how they were both sopping wet. But despite Van's initial relief, his face darkened at the sight of Hitomi, and the memory of what she'd told him. Hitomi just stared at him. All of a sudden, she just collapsed, falling forward onto him and wrapping him in a tight hug. Over his shoulder, she cried softly. Van's eyes widened. What was going on with her? He closed his eyes, patting her back tenderly. They stood locked in their embrace for a long time, before Van led the way back to his castle.
A/N: Sorry for the really short chap…. But I PROMISE that something good is going to happen in the next one. And hey, at least Adara's set straight- btw, she wasn't supposed to be a rival, or evil, or anything. I'll post chapter 7 sooner than I posted this one, woo-hoo! Newayz pleeze review… that would be very nice! ;)
~Starry Eyes