Road Trip 2
Prologue
Vegeta had been sitting out side all day, board as usual. Bulma wanted him to go out with Trunks, to spend some "quality time" with him. Yeah, right. Playing with the children, was a woman's job, as was cleaning, cooking, and anything else that sounded like work. The only job of the male was to protect, train, teach the children how to fight, and help in making the children. That was all.
Vegeta herd the door open behind him. He turned around just in time to get smacked in the face with a bag full of his belongings. Ok, so maybe he was getting kicked out. That didn't bother him. The truth was he wanted to leave. Yes, he loved his kids, and yes he cared for Bulma, but he just couldn't stand being cooped up in that little house all day. Vegeta needed a vacation. As he lay on his back with the bag of stuff lying on his chest, he thought about taking a long road trip. He had missed out on the one Gohan and Videl went on, and now he wished he had gone. He would have given anything to see the look on that Namek's face when Satan's daughter put the moves on him. That would've been worth a thousand trips to the park with the kids.
'Maybe I'll go on a road trip my self. I can't go alone. That would be pointless…maybe I'll bring Kakarotto with me. That won't be too bad.'
"That's what I'll do! Look out world here I come!"
With that, Vegeta sprung up, ready for action. He grabbed his bag and started out towards Goku's. He stopped in mid-lift off, falling on his face.
"Damn, I forgot. Kakarotto's still on that second honey moon with that woman of his…what now?"
Then Vegeta got a great idea. Maybe it was all the homework he had helped Trunks do, maybe it was the coffee he had with breakfast, or maybe it was just the mud that was seeping into his mouth, but something told Vegeta, he had to get Goku back.
1 Chapter 1
Vegeta picked himself up, wiping mud from his face and ringing it out of his hair. He turned to leave, when a small voice called out to him.
" Where ya goin' dad?"
It was Trunks.
"Just thought I'd take a vacation, what's it to ya?"
Trunks shrugged.
"Nothin'. What kinda vacation are you taking?"
Vegeta rolled his eyes and sighed. Kids had so many questions, why did they have to be so damn nosy? Couldn't he just mind his own business?
"Road trip."
Trunks smiled wide. Past memories filled his head. He wanted to go with, but he knew he couldn't just ask Vegeta flat out right this minute. No, this would take a higher power. Trunks breathed in until his lungs looked like they were about to pop. Vegeta's eyes widened, he knew what was coming. Vegeta shook his head, pleading with his son, but it was too late.
"MOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOM!"
Trunks yelled so loud the birds in the trees were scared, and scattered in all directions. Bulma came to the door, she looked a little angry, (witch was a huge under statement.)
"What is it Trunks?"
Trunks smiled, he had his father right where he wanted him.
"Dad said that he was going…"
Vegeta quickly covered Trunks' mouth.
"..to take Trunks on a trip, with me to, to, to see Kakarotto."
Bulma raised an eyebrow, she wasn't stupid. She knew something was up, but this time she let it slide. Vegeta was going to take Trunks with him some where, witch would give her a break from the little monster for a while. That, she was glad for. Sure, she loved her son, but he was just like his father. He was sneaky, troublesome, loud, to strong for her to handle, and above all, he was stubborn.
"Fine, go."
Bulma walked back inside, and slammed the door. Trunks jumped up in the air claiming victory.
"Yeah, so where are we going?"
Vegeta stood up straight, brushing some dry mud from his shirt.
"To ruin Kakarotto's honeymoon."
Trunks looked confused.
"Why? Did he do something to you?"
Vegeta shook his head, disappointed. He bent down, and put a hand on his son's shoulder.
"Son, let me tell you something. I am a prince; witch makes you a prince. When you are a prince, you can do whatever you want. Therefore, you don't need a reason for ruining someone's good time."
Trunks stood there a moment, pondering what his father had just said.
"Sooo, if mom asks…"
"Chichi got sick, and Kakarotto asked us to take her home."
"Got it."
Yet again Vegeta tries to take off, but is stopped by Trunks.
"Uh, dad. How are we going to pay for anything…I thought mom cut your allowance?"
Vegeta stands tall, laughing under his breath.
"I am a grown man, and a Siayan prince! I take what I want, when I want, any time I want. GOT IT!"
"Uhh…yeah dad…I got it."
Vegeta shakes his head, removing invisible hair from his face.
"Let's go then. We have to pick up a car. Mom took the key away again."
Vegeta takes off. Trunks watches his father for a few moments, shakes his head, then follows close behind.
After a short trip Vegeta and Trunks land across the street from a car dealer.
"Wow! We're buying a new car! Awesome!"
Vegeta rubs the back of his neck.
"Ok, wait here, and when I drive by, jump in, and quick. Don't stop to ask questions, you just get in the car. Got it?"
"Yeah, I think so…but why…"
Trunks didn't finish, Vegeta had already left for the dealership. Trunks sat down by the side of the road waiting for his dad to return. He didn't have to wait long, within a few moments Vegeta came speeding towards him in a brand new red Mustang Convertible. The car skidded to a stop, Trunks walked up to the passenger side door and hesitated.
"What's the matter, Trunks? Get in!"
"But dad…"
"No buts, now get it the damn CAR!"
Trunks threw open the car door, and Vegeta took off before Trunks had the chance to shut it.
"Dad did you steal…"
Vegeta turned to Trunks, giving him a look so evil that it made him sink in his seat.
"It's not really stealing. These pathetic earthlings owe it to me for saving their little planet, and as a thank you for not sending them into the next dimension when I knew I should've."
Trunks nodded his head, his father was a psycho. A complete psycho. Goku sure didn't act like that, and Trunks was sure no normal living thing did either. This was going to be the longest trip of his life.
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5 Chapter 2
The two had been on the road for only an hour when Trunks' stomach began to growl. Every time a noise escaped Trunks' belly, Vegeta snarled. The noise made it hard to concentrate. Couldn't that boy keep his bodily functions to himself?
Trunks started to fidget, he shifted in his seat, he sighed, he even moaned a few times. Anything to make his father realize he was hungry. Of course, all Trunks got in response was an annoyed look, and a few disapproving grunts. Finally, Trunks decided to speak up.
"…dad…"
"What now Trunks?"
"I'm kinda, um, hungry. Could I have something to eat?"
Vegeta looked around. For miles, there was nothing but desert road. Why, oh, why couldn't the boy get hungry when they were in town? No, that wouldn't happen. That wouldn't happen because everything hated him. Trunks' digestive system worst of all. Vegeta looked at Trunks, no, more like glared at him.
"Why didn't you ask for something when we were in town?"
"I wasn't hungry then."
"Well what the hell do you want me to do, Trunks? Oh, wait, I know! Just let reach back and pull a Big Mac out of my ASS! Would you like some fries too? I can yank 'em out of my nose for ya son, would that be alright? Or is that not good enough? Maybe I should pull over and DIE! Then you could eat the dying flesh from my bones! How about that? Huh? That good enough for ya, Trunks? That good enough for ya?"
Trunks sinks back in his seat, terrified. He looks at his feet, and picks nervously at his pants. Vegeta becomes more enraged. He just couldn't understand what that boy's problem was.
"Not gunna answer me?"
Trunks looks up at his father, tears running down his cheek.
"I'm sorry dad…I'm not hungry. I'll be fine. I'm sorry."
Great! Just Great! Now Vegeta felt like a giant ass. How could he deprive his son of food? It was wrong, very wrong, and he knew it. Vegeta reached across Trunks, and opened the glove compartment. He pulled out a doughnut, and handed it to Trunks.
"Here. I got 'em at the car dealership."
Trunks accepted the doughnut gladly. He ate slow, savoring every bite.
'Tanks, Dab" Trunks said with a full mouth.
Vegeta paid no attention. He had done his good deed for the day, and he sure wasn't going to say 'your welcome' any time soon.
6 Chapter 3
Finally, the two came out of the desert, and into a large city. Vegeta was glad to be back in society. Sure, he hated every one of those be-damned weakling humans, but it was better to have their company, then no company at all. After a while, Vegeta came upon a movie theater. Trunks sat up, excited.
"Dad, Dad, Dad, Dad, Dad, Dad, Dad, Dad, Dad, Dad, Dad, Dad, Dad, Dad, Dad, Dad, Dad, Dad, Dad, Dad, Dad, Dad, Dad, Dad, Dad, Dad, Dad, Dad, Dad, Dad, Dad, Dad, Dad, Dad, Dad, Dad, Dad, Dad!"
"WHAT ALREADY?!?!?"
"Can we see a movie?"
"I don't know…what kind of movie?"
"Well…there's this comedy…it has that one dude in it, oh, and that one girl…can we?"
"What's the name of the movie?"
"I don't remember…"
"Well, what's it about?"
"Well there's this one guy, and he's in this one place, and he does that thing…ya know with the cat, ya know dad. That one actor plays him. You remember the preview, right dad? Ya know, where those people do that one stunt, and they have that one thing…you remember right?"
Vegeta stares blankly at Trunks. What in the hell was he talking about? It didn't matter, only one thing mattered. If they were going to see a comedy, there was only one thing that he needed to know about the movie.
"Does it have a fighting cow?"
Trunks looks quizzically at his father.
"A what?"
"A fighting cow, it's not a comedy unless it has a fighting cow." Vegeta raises a finger into the air. "You must have the cow! Does it have one?"
"I don't remember, but I can find out."
"Okay, we'll go."
"Yay!"
Vegeta pulls into the parking lot of the Movie Theater. The two get out.
"Trunks, you get the tickets, and I'll get the snacks. Okay?"
"Okay."
Vegeta heads inside, Trunks goes up to the counter.
"Um, sir, are you playing that one movie, ya know with that one guy?"
"Huh? Oh, yeah, that one movie. Yeah, yeah, that comedy with that chick and those people that do that thing with the thing, yeah. That one with the fighting cow."
"It has a fighting cow?"
"Yep."
"Awesome! 2 please!"
Trunks pays for the tickets, (Where he got the money is up to your imagination) then heads to Vegeta. Trunks is so excited he stops in the doorway and shouts across the room to the snack counter.
"DAAAAAD! DAAAAAD!"
Vegeta looks up from his wallet.
"What?"
"It has a fighting cow!"
Vegeta gives Trunks two enthusiastic thumbs up, then grabs the popcorn, and pop.
"What theater are we in, son?"
"Uh…8."
The two head for the theater, hand in hand.
7 Chapter 4
The movie sucked, completely, well except for the fighting cow. Vegeta and Trunks drove silently down another desert road. Vegeta turns on the radio, and plays some country music. Trunks looks concerned.
"Dad? Are you okay? You only play country music when you're in trouble. What's wrong?"
Vegeta nods his head towards the rearview mirror. Trunks looks into it. He spots a cop car about a half-mile behind them. Trunks plops back down in the seat.
"I knew it! You did steal this car! Dad!"
"What? It's not like I have the money to buy a car!"
"You could've rented!"
Vegeta is about to start an argument with Trunks, when the cop car turns on its lights. Vegeta reluctantly pulls over. An officer approaches the window.
"Is there a problem officer?"
"Yes, your car matches the description of a stolen car from the Western Capitol, I need you to come with me to the station."
"Alright."
The cop gets back in his car, and Vegeta waits for him to pass, then follows. After a few hours, they finally reach the station. Vegeta parks the car, and gets out, following the police officer inside.
"Sir, I'm afraid you're driving a stolen car. Did you have knowledge of this?"
Trunks steps forward, planning to teach his father a lesson.
"Yeah, of course. My dad stole the car this morning before we left."
The cop kneels to Trunks' height.
"That so?"
"Yep."
The cop stand back up.
"Reo, Dominique, you two take care of this guy will ya?"
Two female cops step forward.
"Hey, I'm Reo. I'd I'm gunna handcuff you to day."
"Reo, come on you got the last one! Let me take care of him."
"Oh, all right."
Dominique turns to Vegeta, and starts to handcuff him, but Reo stops her.
"Wait, we'd better ask him about the kid first."
Reo turns to Vegeta.
"Vegeta, I'm going to call the boy's mother, okay?"
"No! Wait! You can't!"
"Why not?"
"Because he doesn't have a mother."
"What?"
"He's…adopted!"
"Ok, well, for car theft, I'd say you'd be put behind bars for, oh two years. We'll just have protective services handle him."
"No! You can't do that!"
"Why not?"
"Because, because…"
"Look, sir, I don't have time for your—"
"Because I'm GAY!"
"WHAT?!?"
Dominique falls over.
"I'm…I'm gay. I didn't want to say it…but I am. I'm sorry. Can I at least call my boyfriend?"
"Go ahead."
Vegeta loosens up his wrists and places both his hands on Reo's shoulders.
"Thanks, sweat heart. You're a doll."
Vegeta walks, as gay as possible, to the phone. He dials the first number that comes to mind.
"Hello? Hey baby. Look, I've gotten my self into quite a pickle. Could you come pick me up. Oh, I don't know hold on, baby."
Vegeta turns to Reo.
"Where am I?"
"Bazzoka, it's five miles south of Tokyo."
"Thanks. Ok, I'm at the police station in Bazzoka. Uh-hm. Five miles south of Tokyo. Ok, bring money baby…Okay. Buh-bye now. Love you too. Oh, you nasty. No I'm not gunna ask 'em for an extra set of hand cuffs…okay. Whips 'n kisses. See ya in an hour. Bye."
Vegeta hangs up the phone. Trunks nearly bursts out in laughter, his mind pondering the numerous people he could've called.
"He'll be hear shortly, with bail money."
Reo shakes her head, and motions for the male cop to talk to her.
"I think we may have a faker."
"Really?"
"Oh, yeah. He's not nearly gay enough."
"Okay, I've got my secret weapon. It never fails. Heh, heh. Just wait 'till his so called 'boyfriend' gets here. Heh, heh."
8 Chapter 5
For a few hours, Vegeta waits, tapping his foot, and checking his watch. Finally, a car pulls up into the parking lot.
"That's him."
Vegeta takes a deep breath. This was going to be the biggest stunt he has ever tried to pull off. It's hard enough to convince someone he's gay let alone—
"Piccolo!"
Trunks jumps up form his seat, his eyes bulging out of his head.
"Hey, Trunks. Vegeta, I don't like getting strange calls from you. So please stop it."
Vegeta performs his 'gay walk' as he gets close to Piccolo.
"I was waitin' for ya. What took so long?"
Piccolo tries to ignore the strange voice Vegeta was using. If only he knew what was going on.
"Vegeta, what have you gotten yourself into this time?"
"Car theft."
"You Baka! What the hell? How did you manage tha?"
Trunks smiles. This is his opertunity.
"Please don't fight, you guys. Why can't we just be one happy family. The way it was before. Please, guys don't fight."
Piccolo slams the palm of his hand into his forehead. This was not his day.
"All right, Vegeta. I'll getcha outta this one, but next time you're on your own."
Vegeta turns to the three cops.
"He says that now, but after tonight, he'll change his mind."
Piccolo pulls out a wallet, and a wod of money, not sure what Vegeta's last comment ment.
"Here this should cover it."
Vegeta goes to grab Trunks, but is stopped by the male cop.
"Hold it. If you're really gay, kiss him."
Piccolo's eyes bulge. So that's what was going on. Vegeta told the cops he was gay so they wouldn't call Bulma. Unbelievable!
"You want me to kiss him?"
"Yeah, I want you to kiss him."
"All right, I'll kiss him. I'll show you some kissin' that'll make a straight man curve."
Vegeta rolls up his sleeves, and marches toward Piccolo. He was going to do get away with this, he wasn't going to let Bulma find out. No way! Vegeta stands before Piccolo, looking upward, he grabs Piccolo's shirt and pulls him to his own height.
"Get down here!"
Vegeta grabs Piccolo's head in his hands and kisses him straight on the lips. The cops watch for what seems like an hour (witch was really about three minutes) as Vegeta frenches Piccolo to death. Finally the two separate, Piccolo in shock.
"That good enough kissin' for ya?"
The cops all nod, stunned. Trunks too, is in a trance. That was too much, even for him. Vegeta puts his hands on his hips, and stands in the door way.
"Trunks, Pic, come on. Let's get outta here."
Piccolo and Trunks follow Vegeta to Piccolo's car. Ordanarially, Trunks would've asked where the car came from, but his mind couldn't waver from the tromitizing sight of his father frenching Piccolo.
9 Chapter 6
For the past few hours, no one has said any thing. Vegeta is a little uncomfortable, and Trunks is scared, but Piccolo is the worst. He can only sit in the back seat, his face froze with the same shock as when Vegeta first kissed him. Finally, he burst out.
"Vegeta."
"Yeah."
"WHY IN THE HELL DID YOU DO THAT!"
"What was I supposed to do? I had to make them believe I was gay!"
"Well, if the cop asked you to give me a blow job, would ya have done that?"
"First, that's impossible, second, I wouldn't even think about putting my mouth there, the very idea sickens me."
Piccolo sit forward, anger rushing through him.
"Okay, First, it's not impossible, second, I wouldn't want you down there!"
"Good! Who want you and your deformed—"
"Deformed! DEFORMED! I'll give you deformed!"
"I'd like to see you try it, limp noodle pants!"
Trunks decides that now would be a good time to but-in, before they get to far.
"Uh, guys, could we not talk about Piccolo's privates right now?"
Vegeta glares at Trunks.
"Shut-up shrimp!"
"Shrimp! Look who's talking, midget!"
"You do know it's genetic, right?"
Trunks gulps and sink down in his chair. Piccolo shakes his head.
"Oh, good one Vegeta. Pick on a kid. You're tough."
"Hey this kid can kick your ass, so sit back, and shut up!"
"I don't have to—"
"Quiet, look behind us."
Piccolo looks back.
"Aww shit, it's those two girl cops from the station."
"Shit, Piccolo act gay!"
Piccolo crosses his legs and throughs both his hands out ward.
"How do I do that!"
"Just be cool okay?"
"Okay."
Vegeta pulls to the side of the road. Piccolo wonders if Vegeta will try to kiss him again, and Trunks hopes he does. This is going to be one hell of a story to tell Bulma.
Prologue
Vegeta had been sitting out side all day, board as usual. Bulma wanted him to go out with Trunks, to spend some "quality time" with him. Yeah, right. Playing with the children, was a woman's job, as was cleaning, cooking, and anything else that sounded like work. The only job of the male was to protect, train, teach the children how to fight, and help in making the children. That was all.
Vegeta herd the door open behind him. He turned around just in time to get smacked in the face with a bag full of his belongings. Ok, so maybe he was getting kicked out. That didn't bother him. The truth was he wanted to leave. Yes, he loved his kids, and yes he cared for Bulma, but he just couldn't stand being cooped up in that little house all day. Vegeta needed a vacation. As he lay on his back with the bag of stuff lying on his chest, he thought about taking a long road trip. He had missed out on the one Gohan and Videl went on, and now he wished he had gone. He would have given anything to see the look on that Namek's face when Satan's daughter put the moves on him. That would've been worth a thousand trips to the park with the kids.
'Maybe I'll go on a road trip my self. I can't go alone. That would be pointless…maybe I'll bring Kakarotto with me. That won't be too bad.'
"That's what I'll do! Look out world here I come!"
With that, Vegeta sprung up, ready for action. He grabbed his bag and started out towards Goku's. He stopped in mid-lift off, falling on his face.
"Damn, I forgot. Kakarotto's still on that second honey moon with that woman of his…what now?"
Then Vegeta got a great idea. Maybe it was all the homework he had helped Trunks do, maybe it was the coffee he had with breakfast, or maybe it was just the mud that was seeping into his mouth, but something told Vegeta, he had to get Goku back.
1 Chapter 1
Vegeta picked himself up, wiping mud from his face and ringing it out of his hair. He turned to leave, when a small voice called out to him.
" Where ya goin' dad?"
It was Trunks.
"Just thought I'd take a vacation, what's it to ya?"
Trunks shrugged.
"Nothin'. What kinda vacation are you taking?"
Vegeta rolled his eyes and sighed. Kids had so many questions, why did they have to be so damn nosy? Couldn't he just mind his own business?
"Road trip."
Trunks smiled wide. Past memories filled his head. He wanted to go with, but he knew he couldn't just ask Vegeta flat out right this minute. No, this would take a higher power. Trunks breathed in until his lungs looked like they were about to pop. Vegeta's eyes widened, he knew what was coming. Vegeta shook his head, pleading with his son, but it was too late.
"MOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOM!"
Trunks yelled so loud the birds in the trees were scared, and scattered in all directions. Bulma came to the door, she looked a little angry, (witch was a huge under statement.)
"What is it Trunks?"
Trunks smiled, he had his father right where he wanted him.
"Dad said that he was going…"
Vegeta quickly covered Trunks' mouth.
"..to take Trunks on a trip, with me to, to, to see Kakarotto."
Bulma raised an eyebrow, she wasn't stupid. She knew something was up, but this time she let it slide. Vegeta was going to take Trunks with him some where, witch would give her a break from the little monster for a while. That, she was glad for. Sure, she loved her son, but he was just like his father. He was sneaky, troublesome, loud, to strong for her to handle, and above all, he was stubborn.
"Fine, go."
Bulma walked back inside, and slammed the door. Trunks jumped up in the air claiming victory.
"Yeah, so where are we going?"
Vegeta stood up straight, brushing some dry mud from his shirt.
"To ruin Kakarotto's honeymoon."
Trunks looked confused.
"Why? Did he do something to you?"
Vegeta shook his head, disappointed. He bent down, and put a hand on his son's shoulder.
"Son, let me tell you something. I am a prince; witch makes you a prince. When you are a prince, you can do whatever you want. Therefore, you don't need a reason for ruining someone's good time."
Trunks stood there a moment, pondering what his father had just said.
"Sooo, if mom asks…"
"Chichi got sick, and Kakarotto asked us to take her home."
"Got it."
Yet again Vegeta tries to take off, but is stopped by Trunks.
"Uh, dad. How are we going to pay for anything…I thought mom cut your allowance?"
Vegeta stands tall, laughing under his breath.
"I am a grown man, and a Siayan prince! I take what I want, when I want, any time I want. GOT IT!"
"Uhh…yeah dad…I got it."
Vegeta shakes his head, removing invisible hair from his face.
"Let's go then. We have to pick up a car. Mom took the key away again."
Vegeta takes off. Trunks watches his father for a few moments, shakes his head, then follows close behind.
After a short trip Vegeta and Trunks land across the street from a car dealer.
"Wow! We're buying a new car! Awesome!"
Vegeta rubs the back of his neck.
"Ok, wait here, and when I drive by, jump in, and quick. Don't stop to ask questions, you just get in the car. Got it?"
"Yeah, I think so…but why…"
Trunks didn't finish, Vegeta had already left for the dealership. Trunks sat down by the side of the road waiting for his dad to return. He didn't have to wait long, within a few moments Vegeta came speeding towards him in a brand new red Mustang Convertible. The car skidded to a stop, Trunks walked up to the passenger side door and hesitated.
"What's the matter, Trunks? Get in!"
"But dad…"
"No buts, now get it the damn CAR!"
Trunks threw open the car door, and Vegeta took off before Trunks had the chance to shut it.
"Dad did you steal…"
Vegeta turned to Trunks, giving him a look so evil that it made him sink in his seat.
"It's not really stealing. These pathetic earthlings owe it to me for saving their little planet, and as a thank you for not sending them into the next dimension when I knew I should've."
Trunks nodded his head, his father was a psycho. A complete psycho. Goku sure didn't act like that, and Trunks was sure no normal living thing did either. This was going to be the longest trip of his life.
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5 Chapter 2
The two had been on the road for only an hour when Trunks' stomach began to growl. Every time a noise escaped Trunks' belly, Vegeta snarled. The noise made it hard to concentrate. Couldn't that boy keep his bodily functions to himself?
Trunks started to fidget, he shifted in his seat, he sighed, he even moaned a few times. Anything to make his father realize he was hungry. Of course, all Trunks got in response was an annoyed look, and a few disapproving grunts. Finally, Trunks decided to speak up.
"…dad…"
"What now Trunks?"
"I'm kinda, um, hungry. Could I have something to eat?"
Vegeta looked around. For miles, there was nothing but desert road. Why, oh, why couldn't the boy get hungry when they were in town? No, that wouldn't happen. That wouldn't happen because everything hated him. Trunks' digestive system worst of all. Vegeta looked at Trunks, no, more like glared at him.
"Why didn't you ask for something when we were in town?"
"I wasn't hungry then."
"Well what the hell do you want me to do, Trunks? Oh, wait, I know! Just let reach back and pull a Big Mac out of my ASS! Would you like some fries too? I can yank 'em out of my nose for ya son, would that be alright? Or is that not good enough? Maybe I should pull over and DIE! Then you could eat the dying flesh from my bones! How about that? Huh? That good enough for ya, Trunks? That good enough for ya?"
Trunks sinks back in his seat, terrified. He looks at his feet, and picks nervously at his pants. Vegeta becomes more enraged. He just couldn't understand what that boy's problem was.
"Not gunna answer me?"
Trunks looks up at his father, tears running down his cheek.
"I'm sorry dad…I'm not hungry. I'll be fine. I'm sorry."
Great! Just Great! Now Vegeta felt like a giant ass. How could he deprive his son of food? It was wrong, very wrong, and he knew it. Vegeta reached across Trunks, and opened the glove compartment. He pulled out a doughnut, and handed it to Trunks.
"Here. I got 'em at the car dealership."
Trunks accepted the doughnut gladly. He ate slow, savoring every bite.
'Tanks, Dab" Trunks said with a full mouth.
Vegeta paid no attention. He had done his good deed for the day, and he sure wasn't going to say 'your welcome' any time soon.
6 Chapter 3
Finally, the two came out of the desert, and into a large city. Vegeta was glad to be back in society. Sure, he hated every one of those be-damned weakling humans, but it was better to have their company, then no company at all. After a while, Vegeta came upon a movie theater. Trunks sat up, excited.
"Dad, Dad, Dad, Dad, Dad, Dad, Dad, Dad, Dad, Dad, Dad, Dad, Dad, Dad, Dad, Dad, Dad, Dad, Dad, Dad, Dad, Dad, Dad, Dad, Dad, Dad, Dad, Dad, Dad, Dad, Dad, Dad, Dad, Dad, Dad, Dad, Dad, Dad!"
"WHAT ALREADY?!?!?"
"Can we see a movie?"
"I don't know…what kind of movie?"
"Well…there's this comedy…it has that one dude in it, oh, and that one girl…can we?"
"What's the name of the movie?"
"I don't remember…"
"Well, what's it about?"
"Well there's this one guy, and he's in this one place, and he does that thing…ya know with the cat, ya know dad. That one actor plays him. You remember the preview, right dad? Ya know, where those people do that one stunt, and they have that one thing…you remember right?"
Vegeta stares blankly at Trunks. What in the hell was he talking about? It didn't matter, only one thing mattered. If they were going to see a comedy, there was only one thing that he needed to know about the movie.
"Does it have a fighting cow?"
Trunks looks quizzically at his father.
"A what?"
"A fighting cow, it's not a comedy unless it has a fighting cow." Vegeta raises a finger into the air. "You must have the cow! Does it have one?"
"I don't remember, but I can find out."
"Okay, we'll go."
"Yay!"
Vegeta pulls into the parking lot of the Movie Theater. The two get out.
"Trunks, you get the tickets, and I'll get the snacks. Okay?"
"Okay."
Vegeta heads inside, Trunks goes up to the counter.
"Um, sir, are you playing that one movie, ya know with that one guy?"
"Huh? Oh, yeah, that one movie. Yeah, yeah, that comedy with that chick and those people that do that thing with the thing, yeah. That one with the fighting cow."
"It has a fighting cow?"
"Yep."
"Awesome! 2 please!"
Trunks pays for the tickets, (Where he got the money is up to your imagination) then heads to Vegeta. Trunks is so excited he stops in the doorway and shouts across the room to the snack counter.
"DAAAAAD! DAAAAAD!"
Vegeta looks up from his wallet.
"What?"
"It has a fighting cow!"
Vegeta gives Trunks two enthusiastic thumbs up, then grabs the popcorn, and pop.
"What theater are we in, son?"
"Uh…8."
The two head for the theater, hand in hand.
7 Chapter 4
The movie sucked, completely, well except for the fighting cow. Vegeta and Trunks drove silently down another desert road. Vegeta turns on the radio, and plays some country music. Trunks looks concerned.
"Dad? Are you okay? You only play country music when you're in trouble. What's wrong?"
Vegeta nods his head towards the rearview mirror. Trunks looks into it. He spots a cop car about a half-mile behind them. Trunks plops back down in the seat.
"I knew it! You did steal this car! Dad!"
"What? It's not like I have the money to buy a car!"
"You could've rented!"
Vegeta is about to start an argument with Trunks, when the cop car turns on its lights. Vegeta reluctantly pulls over. An officer approaches the window.
"Is there a problem officer?"
"Yes, your car matches the description of a stolen car from the Western Capitol, I need you to come with me to the station."
"Alright."
The cop gets back in his car, and Vegeta waits for him to pass, then follows. After a few hours, they finally reach the station. Vegeta parks the car, and gets out, following the police officer inside.
"Sir, I'm afraid you're driving a stolen car. Did you have knowledge of this?"
Trunks steps forward, planning to teach his father a lesson.
"Yeah, of course. My dad stole the car this morning before we left."
The cop kneels to Trunks' height.
"That so?"
"Yep."
The cop stand back up.
"Reo, Dominique, you two take care of this guy will ya?"
Two female cops step forward.
"Hey, I'm Reo. I'd I'm gunna handcuff you to day."
"Reo, come on you got the last one! Let me take care of him."
"Oh, all right."
Dominique turns to Vegeta, and starts to handcuff him, but Reo stops her.
"Wait, we'd better ask him about the kid first."
Reo turns to Vegeta.
"Vegeta, I'm going to call the boy's mother, okay?"
"No! Wait! You can't!"
"Why not?"
"Because he doesn't have a mother."
"What?"
"He's…adopted!"
"Ok, well, for car theft, I'd say you'd be put behind bars for, oh two years. We'll just have protective services handle him."
"No! You can't do that!"
"Why not?"
"Because, because…"
"Look, sir, I don't have time for your—"
"Because I'm GAY!"
"WHAT?!?"
Dominique falls over.
"I'm…I'm gay. I didn't want to say it…but I am. I'm sorry. Can I at least call my boyfriend?"
"Go ahead."
Vegeta loosens up his wrists and places both his hands on Reo's shoulders.
"Thanks, sweat heart. You're a doll."
Vegeta walks, as gay as possible, to the phone. He dials the first number that comes to mind.
"Hello? Hey baby. Look, I've gotten my self into quite a pickle. Could you come pick me up. Oh, I don't know hold on, baby."
Vegeta turns to Reo.
"Where am I?"
"Bazzoka, it's five miles south of Tokyo."
"Thanks. Ok, I'm at the police station in Bazzoka. Uh-hm. Five miles south of Tokyo. Ok, bring money baby…Okay. Buh-bye now. Love you too. Oh, you nasty. No I'm not gunna ask 'em for an extra set of hand cuffs…okay. Whips 'n kisses. See ya in an hour. Bye."
Vegeta hangs up the phone. Trunks nearly bursts out in laughter, his mind pondering the numerous people he could've called.
"He'll be hear shortly, with bail money."
Reo shakes her head, and motions for the male cop to talk to her.
"I think we may have a faker."
"Really?"
"Oh, yeah. He's not nearly gay enough."
"Okay, I've got my secret weapon. It never fails. Heh, heh. Just wait 'till his so called 'boyfriend' gets here. Heh, heh."
8 Chapter 5
For a few hours, Vegeta waits, tapping his foot, and checking his watch. Finally, a car pulls up into the parking lot.
"That's him."
Vegeta takes a deep breath. This was going to be the biggest stunt he has ever tried to pull off. It's hard enough to convince someone he's gay let alone—
"Piccolo!"
Trunks jumps up form his seat, his eyes bulging out of his head.
"Hey, Trunks. Vegeta, I don't like getting strange calls from you. So please stop it."
Vegeta performs his 'gay walk' as he gets close to Piccolo.
"I was waitin' for ya. What took so long?"
Piccolo tries to ignore the strange voice Vegeta was using. If only he knew what was going on.
"Vegeta, what have you gotten yourself into this time?"
"Car theft."
"You Baka! What the hell? How did you manage tha?"
Trunks smiles. This is his opertunity.
"Please don't fight, you guys. Why can't we just be one happy family. The way it was before. Please, guys don't fight."
Piccolo slams the palm of his hand into his forehead. This was not his day.
"All right, Vegeta. I'll getcha outta this one, but next time you're on your own."
Vegeta turns to the three cops.
"He says that now, but after tonight, he'll change his mind."
Piccolo pulls out a wallet, and a wod of money, not sure what Vegeta's last comment ment.
"Here this should cover it."
Vegeta goes to grab Trunks, but is stopped by the male cop.
"Hold it. If you're really gay, kiss him."
Piccolo's eyes bulge. So that's what was going on. Vegeta told the cops he was gay so they wouldn't call Bulma. Unbelievable!
"You want me to kiss him?"
"Yeah, I want you to kiss him."
"All right, I'll kiss him. I'll show you some kissin' that'll make a straight man curve."
Vegeta rolls up his sleeves, and marches toward Piccolo. He was going to do get away with this, he wasn't going to let Bulma find out. No way! Vegeta stands before Piccolo, looking upward, he grabs Piccolo's shirt and pulls him to his own height.
"Get down here!"
Vegeta grabs Piccolo's head in his hands and kisses him straight on the lips. The cops watch for what seems like an hour (witch was really about three minutes) as Vegeta frenches Piccolo to death. Finally the two separate, Piccolo in shock.
"That good enough kissin' for ya?"
The cops all nod, stunned. Trunks too, is in a trance. That was too much, even for him. Vegeta puts his hands on his hips, and stands in the door way.
"Trunks, Pic, come on. Let's get outta here."
Piccolo and Trunks follow Vegeta to Piccolo's car. Ordanarially, Trunks would've asked where the car came from, but his mind couldn't waver from the tromitizing sight of his father frenching Piccolo.
9 Chapter 6
For the past few hours, no one has said any thing. Vegeta is a little uncomfortable, and Trunks is scared, but Piccolo is the worst. He can only sit in the back seat, his face froze with the same shock as when Vegeta first kissed him. Finally, he burst out.
"Vegeta."
"Yeah."
"WHY IN THE HELL DID YOU DO THAT!"
"What was I supposed to do? I had to make them believe I was gay!"
"Well, if the cop asked you to give me a blow job, would ya have done that?"
"First, that's impossible, second, I wouldn't even think about putting my mouth there, the very idea sickens me."
Piccolo sit forward, anger rushing through him.
"Okay, First, it's not impossible, second, I wouldn't want you down there!"
"Good! Who want you and your deformed—"
"Deformed! DEFORMED! I'll give you deformed!"
"I'd like to see you try it, limp noodle pants!"
Trunks decides that now would be a good time to but-in, before they get to far.
"Uh, guys, could we not talk about Piccolo's privates right now?"
Vegeta glares at Trunks.
"Shut-up shrimp!"
"Shrimp! Look who's talking, midget!"
"You do know it's genetic, right?"
Trunks gulps and sink down in his chair. Piccolo shakes his head.
"Oh, good one Vegeta. Pick on a kid. You're tough."
"Hey this kid can kick your ass, so sit back, and shut up!"
"I don't have to—"
"Quiet, look behind us."
Piccolo looks back.
"Aww shit, it's those two girl cops from the station."
"Shit, Piccolo act gay!"
Piccolo crosses his legs and throughs both his hands out ward.
"How do I do that!"
"Just be cool okay?"
"Okay."
Vegeta pulls to the side of the road. Piccolo wonders if Vegeta will try to kiss him again, and Trunks hopes he does. This is going to be one hell of a story to tell Bulma.