Because I was asked, I had to add a second chapter. And because another
reviewer wanted to see "Hero" in a story, I did my best. Not the best
reunion scene, but better then that Designate This thing. *shudders at the
memory*
~*~*~*~
I walked into the apartment. It had been almost three months, and I had given up hope. Max was gone and no matter how much I wished it wasn't so, no amount of faith could raise the dead. It hurts me to say it, but I make myself. Every morning I wake up and die a little inside when she isn't there. But I make myself stand in front of that mirror, the mirror where I told her she had the single most beautiful face… but that is in the past. And I can't stay there forever.
I see that Asha took it upon herself to straighten up the front hall. Sometimes I wonder what she really wants. Nobody hangs around just to hang around. Except Max, the traitorous voice in my mind says. Some days I wish I had died that night. To be honest with myself, I wish for that every day. Instead I have to stay here and fight. Keep alive the memory of the fallen. It's the worst job, it isn't the dying that kills you but the living.
As I walked into the living room, I spied a female silhouette.
"The sun came up and the sun went down…it did, didn't it?"
"Max?" I ask disbelievingly.
She kept on talking, not registering my presence. I couldn't recognize her voice, it had lost any sense of life, it was monotonous and void of emotion. "I was laying in the infirmary, and every day a little bit of light would seep through. It always reminded me of you, the way that you just ended up being in my life, no matter what I wanted. Every little nuance of light reminded me something about you. Little things really, the way you smiled or how your brow always furrowed when you were worried. The way that you were willing to forgive others, but not yourself. Even when you gave up, even in that last moment you planned to be on Earth, you were thinking of those around you. Do you have any idea how much I thank whatever higher power there is that the water seeped through that night? You can't imagine how terrified I was, that I wouldn't get here in time. That for once not even my genetically engineered ass could save the day.
As I lay there day after day, night after night, all these insane thoughts ran through my head. And the night, when the room was so dark, I felt like that year, that brief year, was just a hallucination. That I had lived in Manticore all my life, that the memories were my way of coping. I was the darkness and the darkness was me. Just me, only 452. No Max Guevara, not Rachel Glasser, just 452. and when dawn began to creep up on me, I'd realize what I fool I was, the light always comes back. But there were times that I was sure it wouldn't, that the darkness was permanent. I cried so much, silent tears that rolled down my cheeks."
As she enlightened me about her time in Manticore I moved towards her. The cushion beside her still form was soft. "Max. listen to me."
She finally turned towards me, and I was shocked by her appearance. A long scratch marred her pretty skin. She catches my look. "Breeding partners. Asshole wouldn't take no for an answer. He…he," her voice became even more hollow, as if she were reading from a piece of paper. "He obtained restraining devices to ensure successfulness in his assignment."
"Max." The need to comfort the frightened woman in my living room overwhelmed me. I gently touched her shoulder, to draw her in the way a parent would calm a nervous child. "It's not your fault, nothing that happened there was your fault. It was mine. I should have stopped you, if I had… none of this could have taken place. It's my fault, I'm so sorry."
Max looked shocked at what I was saying. "None of this is your fault Logan Cale, and you're the only reason I'm standing here now. So don't go beating yourself up over something you can't change. I'm here for tonight, and that's all that matters."
"Tonight?" the unspoken questions are in my voice.
"Only tonight. The thing about plenty of time is that you think. And when you start to think, you realize things. I can't stay, I can't put you in danger. I'd rather know that you are safe then to jeopardize your well- being. Don't argue with me."
"Whatever milady wishes shall be so," I say. "If all we have is tonight, then that's what I'll live off of for the rest of my life." If this is how she wants it, I'll just have to change her mind, I rationalized. I go to the CD player and turn it on. "May I have this dance, ma'am?" I extended my hand as the gentle melody began.
"Let me be your hero
would you dance
if I asked you to dance?
Would you run
and never look back?
Would you cry
if you saw me crying
And would you save my soul, tonight?
Would you tremble
if I touched your lips?
Would you laugh?
Oh please tell me this.
Now would you die
for the one you loved?
Hold me in your arms, tonight."
I moved in closer, so my lips just brushed hers. She responded quietly, moving her body to meet mine.
"I can be your hero, baby.
I can kiss away the pain.
I will stand by you forever.
You can take my breath away.
Would you swear
that you'll always be mine?
Or would you lie?
Would you run and hide?
Am I in too deep?
Have I lost my mind?
I don't care...
You're here tonight.
I can be your hero, baby.
I can kiss away the pain.
I will stand by you forever.
You can take my breath away.
Oh, I just want to hold you.
I just want to hold you.
Am I in too deep?
Have I lost my mind?
I don't care...
You're here tonight.
I can be your hero, baby.
I can kiss away the pain.
I will stand by your forever.
You can take my breath away.
I can be your hero.
I can kiss away the pain.
And I will stand by you forever.
You can take my breath away.
You can take my breath away.
I can be your hero."
~*~*~*~*~*~
If you want to know what happens, I guess you'll have to review! And if you don't please review anyways so I know how to improve. I only do what I'm asked, so it's, well, my fault if it sucks. I know that it's a little out of character, but hypothetically all the time spent thinking left a lot of room to think. It's incredible what people can think of when they have time and nothing else. Insomnia made me wise. :)
~*~*~*~
I walked into the apartment. It had been almost three months, and I had given up hope. Max was gone and no matter how much I wished it wasn't so, no amount of faith could raise the dead. It hurts me to say it, but I make myself. Every morning I wake up and die a little inside when she isn't there. But I make myself stand in front of that mirror, the mirror where I told her she had the single most beautiful face… but that is in the past. And I can't stay there forever.
I see that Asha took it upon herself to straighten up the front hall. Sometimes I wonder what she really wants. Nobody hangs around just to hang around. Except Max, the traitorous voice in my mind says. Some days I wish I had died that night. To be honest with myself, I wish for that every day. Instead I have to stay here and fight. Keep alive the memory of the fallen. It's the worst job, it isn't the dying that kills you but the living.
As I walked into the living room, I spied a female silhouette.
"The sun came up and the sun went down…it did, didn't it?"
"Max?" I ask disbelievingly.
She kept on talking, not registering my presence. I couldn't recognize her voice, it had lost any sense of life, it was monotonous and void of emotion. "I was laying in the infirmary, and every day a little bit of light would seep through. It always reminded me of you, the way that you just ended up being in my life, no matter what I wanted. Every little nuance of light reminded me something about you. Little things really, the way you smiled or how your brow always furrowed when you were worried. The way that you were willing to forgive others, but not yourself. Even when you gave up, even in that last moment you planned to be on Earth, you were thinking of those around you. Do you have any idea how much I thank whatever higher power there is that the water seeped through that night? You can't imagine how terrified I was, that I wouldn't get here in time. That for once not even my genetically engineered ass could save the day.
As I lay there day after day, night after night, all these insane thoughts ran through my head. And the night, when the room was so dark, I felt like that year, that brief year, was just a hallucination. That I had lived in Manticore all my life, that the memories were my way of coping. I was the darkness and the darkness was me. Just me, only 452. No Max Guevara, not Rachel Glasser, just 452. and when dawn began to creep up on me, I'd realize what I fool I was, the light always comes back. But there were times that I was sure it wouldn't, that the darkness was permanent. I cried so much, silent tears that rolled down my cheeks."
As she enlightened me about her time in Manticore I moved towards her. The cushion beside her still form was soft. "Max. listen to me."
She finally turned towards me, and I was shocked by her appearance. A long scratch marred her pretty skin. She catches my look. "Breeding partners. Asshole wouldn't take no for an answer. He…he," her voice became even more hollow, as if she were reading from a piece of paper. "He obtained restraining devices to ensure successfulness in his assignment."
"Max." The need to comfort the frightened woman in my living room overwhelmed me. I gently touched her shoulder, to draw her in the way a parent would calm a nervous child. "It's not your fault, nothing that happened there was your fault. It was mine. I should have stopped you, if I had… none of this could have taken place. It's my fault, I'm so sorry."
Max looked shocked at what I was saying. "None of this is your fault Logan Cale, and you're the only reason I'm standing here now. So don't go beating yourself up over something you can't change. I'm here for tonight, and that's all that matters."
"Tonight?" the unspoken questions are in my voice.
"Only tonight. The thing about plenty of time is that you think. And when you start to think, you realize things. I can't stay, I can't put you in danger. I'd rather know that you are safe then to jeopardize your well- being. Don't argue with me."
"Whatever milady wishes shall be so," I say. "If all we have is tonight, then that's what I'll live off of for the rest of my life." If this is how she wants it, I'll just have to change her mind, I rationalized. I go to the CD player and turn it on. "May I have this dance, ma'am?" I extended my hand as the gentle melody began.
"Let me be your hero
would you dance
if I asked you to dance?
Would you run
and never look back?
Would you cry
if you saw me crying
And would you save my soul, tonight?
Would you tremble
if I touched your lips?
Would you laugh?
Oh please tell me this.
Now would you die
for the one you loved?
Hold me in your arms, tonight."
I moved in closer, so my lips just brushed hers. She responded quietly, moving her body to meet mine.
"I can be your hero, baby.
I can kiss away the pain.
I will stand by you forever.
You can take my breath away.
Would you swear
that you'll always be mine?
Or would you lie?
Would you run and hide?
Am I in too deep?
Have I lost my mind?
I don't care...
You're here tonight.
I can be your hero, baby.
I can kiss away the pain.
I will stand by you forever.
You can take my breath away.
Oh, I just want to hold you.
I just want to hold you.
Am I in too deep?
Have I lost my mind?
I don't care...
You're here tonight.
I can be your hero, baby.
I can kiss away the pain.
I will stand by your forever.
You can take my breath away.
I can be your hero.
I can kiss away the pain.
And I will stand by you forever.
You can take my breath away.
You can take my breath away.
I can be your hero."
~*~*~*~*~*~
If you want to know what happens, I guess you'll have to review! And if you don't please review anyways so I know how to improve. I only do what I'm asked, so it's, well, my fault if it sucks. I know that it's a little out of character, but hypothetically all the time spent thinking left a lot of room to think. It's incredible what people can think of when they have time and nothing else. Insomnia made me wise. :)