No Need for Tenchis - Chapter 2
"Just kill me now," Tenchi muttered under his breath as he walked out of the Masaki house, with six reluctant copies of himself behind him, each a different facet of his personality. Washu's latest experiment wasn't doing anything to lower his high blood pressure.
"Where the hell are we going? Who made you boss anyway?" Red Tenchi asked. Tenchi stopped walking, since they'd reached the steps of the Masaki shrine, and turned to face himselves. Each one had different color buttons on their school uniforms, presumably so he could tell them all apart.
"Look, this is for your own good," the real Tenchi said. "I need you all to just stay at the shrine until Washu fixes this."
"By 'fixes this' you refer to our elimination," Purple Tenchi said, scowling.
"We're going to be eliminated?" Pale Green Tenchi said, sweatdropping.
"Don't be ridiculous," Forest Green Tenchi said. "We can't ALL be Tenchi. Washu will just recombine all of us into one form."
"Great," Red Tenchi said, although he didn't sound too enthusiastic. Tenchi looked from one to the other--whether they were him or not, he had no idea of he could trust any of them. He glanced at his watch--another few minutes and he'd be late to school.
"We should be going to class soon," Pale Green Tenchi said.
"NO!" Tenchi said, picturing the chaos seven of him in class would cause. "I mean--I'll go to class. I just need all of you to STAY HERE until Washu can...er...merge us back together, OK?" he asked. Six of him looked skeptical. "Please--just stay in the shrine. Don't go outside, whatever you do, OK?"
"Sure," Peach Tenchi said, shrugging.
"Whatever," Red Tenchi replied noncommittally.
"What if the girls come here?" Pale Green asked.
"Hide," Tenchi said. "Don't let the girls see you."
"What if they're naked?" Red asked with a grin. Tenchi shot himself the most withering glare he could, then turned and walked up the steps to the shrine.
Tenchi walked into the shrine and looked around for his grandfather. He didn't look like he was there--not good. He really wanted him to watch over the six extra Tenchis, but with a sigh, Tenchi realized he'd just have to trust them.
"OK, everyone, he's not here. But just DON'T LEAVE THE SHRINE. Whatever you do, for the Love of God, do NOT go outside, OK?" he asked. Six heads that looked just like his nodded. Tenchi sighed. "Thanks--I'll be back around 3. If you need food, grandpa's got food in the fridge--and if he comes back, try to explain."
"What's wrong, Tenchi?" Kimiko, the girl who sat next to him in class, asked as they waited for math class to start. "You've been out of it all morning."
"Oh, nothing," Tenchi replied, sweatdropping. His mind raced with possibilities--either Washu had fixed everything, or far more likely, Washu had fixed nothing, the Tenchis were out and causing immeasurable damage to his reputation. All the girls would hate him, or love him, or much, much worse...
"You look kind of pale," Kimiko said, looking concerned.
"No, I'm fine, really," Tenchi said, managing a nervous grin that made him look anything but fine. Kimiko was about to reply when the teacher walked in to start the class. Tenchi glanced over at Kimiko--she was an attractive girl, with blond shoulder-length hair and blue-green eyes that looked like the color of the ocean somewhere tropical. If he was a normal guy, he'd be making passes at her and not worrying about Washu, clones of himself, carrot-mad cabbits, and space pirates and princesses conspiring to blow up his house. Then again, he had to admit ordinary girls just seemed...too ordinary compared to the girls back home. Although Washu's inventions he could definitely do without.
When the chimes rang for the end of class, Tenchi ran to the window, jumped out in front of his shocked classmates, fell two stories, landed perfectly, and broke into a mad dash back towards home. He realized jumping out the window probably should have killed him, but he had an urgent mission. He had no idea what would be waiting for him when he got home, but somehow he knew it would be very, very bad. He took the steps to the shrine two at a time, and sprinted up to its door.
"I'm home!" he called, sliding open the door to the shrine. "Guys?" he asked, wondering if one of his selves was enough of a practical joker to get the rest to hide from him. He looked around everywhere, in a panic--they were gone.
"Washu must have gotten rid of them," Tenchi said to himself. "Thank Go--" he stopped as he heard two people laughing. Mihoshi was one of them--and the other person laughing was him. And real Tenchi's lips weren't moving.
Tenchi rushed outside, just in time to see Mihoshi with Peach Tenchi, laughing at something one of them had said.
"Tenchi, you're so funny," Mihoshi said, playfully batting his arm.
"No, you are, you're hilarious," Peach Tenchi said. "I can't think of the last time I laughed so hard, but I guess I'm normally kind of a tightas--hey, Tenchi!" he said, suddenly noticing the real Tenchi.
"Is this your brother?" Mihoshi asked him.
"Kind of," real Tenchi said. "Can I talk to you for a second?" he said as menacingly as he could to Peach Tenchi.
"Sure," Peach replied. He turned to Mihoshi. "See you soon--is 6:00 OK?"
"I'll be there," Mihoshi replied, blushing, then turning and walking down the steps, humming the background music for a TV commercial as she walked.
"Six o'clock? What's happening at six o'clock??" real Tenchi asked.
"We've got a date--we're going to that new burger place in town. You never take the girls out, and it's mean to have Sasami cook all the time. It'll be fun," Peach Tenchi said, smiling. Tenchi looked at Peach Tenchi and wondered how anyone with even a shred of his personality could be so relaxed.
"What happened to what I told you? Staying in the shrine? Where's everyone else?" Tenchi asked.
"Yeah, we got bored," Peach Tenchi said. "I mean, grandpa doesn't even have a PlayStation," he added. Tenchi's heart rate tripled in panic. He could just see Red Tenchi going up to Ryoko, using some cheesy line, and 30 seconds later he'd be doing...well, they'd be well on their way to making mini-Tenchis.
"Where's Red Tenchi?" Tenchi asked.
"He went towards the house," Peach Tenchi said. "Then I ran into Mihoshi, so I didn't see him after that."
Tenchi was already running towards the house by the time Peach finished his sentence. Would Ryoko desert him? The thought made him feel like he'd been punched in the stomach. It wasn't even really deserting him, it was just a different Tenchi who was a pain in the ass. Then there were the other girls--he wondered if they all had dates with him just like Mihoshi.
"Tenchi!" Tenchi yelled, opening the door to the house and feeling kind of silly for calling his own name. "Washu? Anyone home?" he called, quickly slipping off his shoes and hurrying into the living room. It was empty, but a chill ran down Tenchi's spine as he heard his own laugh, coming from the backyard. Tenchi ran for the back door, slid open the screen door and saw something he hadn't expected.
"Tenchi?" Aeka said, looking at him with a confused look on her face. Her and Pale Green Tenchi were sitting across from each other, having tea together. Even though Pale Green was a copy of him, Tenchi still felt a small pang of jealously--although it was quickly replaced by fear, because he doubted Red would be happy just having tea with Ryoko.
"Where's Red?" Tenchi asked Pale Green.
"I'm sure I have no idea," Pale Green Tenchi replied. "The princess and I were just enjoying tea--" Tenchi turned and ran back inside, trying to think of where Red would go. He stopped at Washu's lab and pulled on the door handle. If Red Tenchi wanted to take Ryoko somewhere private, it didn't get more remote than a lab in another dimension. Tenchi pounded on the door.
"Open up!" Tenchi yelled. The door opened a crack, and Purple Tenchi stuck his head out.
"Um--can you come back later?" Purple asked, sweatdropping. Tenchi noticed Purple was wearing a bathrobe with a little chibi-Washu embroidered on the pocket.
"Is Washu in there?" Tenchi asked.
"I'm working on the solution!" Washu's voice called. "Don't worry, everything will be fine!"
"Washu!" Tenchi called through the door, not wanting to go in and see her in her nurse's outfit or worse. "Where's Ryoko?"
"I don't know, I'm kind of busy right now," Washu called back.
Tenchi gave Purple a hostile glare, then turned and ran outside of the house, towards the carrot fields. There was a small shed near there--he didn't want to think of what Red Tenchi might be trying to pull on Ryoko right now.
He got halfway there, before he saw Sasami--walking down a path through the woods with himself. Tenchi ran after them, and caught up with Sasami and Yellow Tenchi.
"What do you think you're doing?" Tenchi asked Yellow. Yellow and Sasami looked at each other, puzzled expressions on their faces, then back at Tenchi.
"We were just going for a walk," Yellow Tenchi said. Tenchi noticed something was wrong with Yellow--the other Tenchis were perfect copies but this one was a little shorter, maybe a little younger also.
"That's all?" Tenchi asked warily.
"What's wrong, Tenchi?" Sasami said. "You're all red--have you been running?"
"Um--have you seen Ryoko?" Tenchi asked. Sasami and Yellow Tenchi shook their heads. "Red Tenchi?"
"No--I haven't seen Ryoko-oneesan or him since lunch," Sasami said.
"Were they with each other?" Tenchi asked, feeling a stab of panic.
"He was talking to her, but when we left everyone was still eating lunch," Sasami said.
"Thanks," Tenchi said, abruptly turning and running back towards the fields. The sun was beating down and sweat was starting to trickle down his face, but he kept running as hard as he could on sheer adrenaline. Almost out of breath, he finally reached the shed by the fields, and threw open the door.
"Ryoko!" Tenchi called. It was empty. He quickly searched to make sure they weren't just hiding somewhere, then sighed and went back outside. He looked in all directions--there was no sign of anyone, just the chirping of birds and insects. He felt like he'd been hit in the stomach--Mihoshi, Aeka, Sasami, Washu, probably even Kiyone and Ryoko although he hadn't found them yet--they all seemed happier with his duplicates than the real thing. Tenchi tried to think of where else Red Tenchi would go--and tried not to think about if he'd be able to get there in time.
[That's it for chapter 2--hope you enjoyed it!]
"Just kill me now," Tenchi muttered under his breath as he walked out of the Masaki house, with six reluctant copies of himself behind him, each a different facet of his personality. Washu's latest experiment wasn't doing anything to lower his high blood pressure.
"Where the hell are we going? Who made you boss anyway?" Red Tenchi asked. Tenchi stopped walking, since they'd reached the steps of the Masaki shrine, and turned to face himselves. Each one had different color buttons on their school uniforms, presumably so he could tell them all apart.
"Look, this is for your own good," the real Tenchi said. "I need you all to just stay at the shrine until Washu fixes this."
"By 'fixes this' you refer to our elimination," Purple Tenchi said, scowling.
"We're going to be eliminated?" Pale Green Tenchi said, sweatdropping.
"Don't be ridiculous," Forest Green Tenchi said. "We can't ALL be Tenchi. Washu will just recombine all of us into one form."
"Great," Red Tenchi said, although he didn't sound too enthusiastic. Tenchi looked from one to the other--whether they were him or not, he had no idea of he could trust any of them. He glanced at his watch--another few minutes and he'd be late to school.
"We should be going to class soon," Pale Green Tenchi said.
"NO!" Tenchi said, picturing the chaos seven of him in class would cause. "I mean--I'll go to class. I just need all of you to STAY HERE until Washu can...er...merge us back together, OK?" he asked. Six of him looked skeptical. "Please--just stay in the shrine. Don't go outside, whatever you do, OK?"
"Sure," Peach Tenchi said, shrugging.
"Whatever," Red Tenchi replied noncommittally.
"What if the girls come here?" Pale Green asked.
"Hide," Tenchi said. "Don't let the girls see you."
"What if they're naked?" Red asked with a grin. Tenchi shot himself the most withering glare he could, then turned and walked up the steps to the shrine.
Tenchi walked into the shrine and looked around for his grandfather. He didn't look like he was there--not good. He really wanted him to watch over the six extra Tenchis, but with a sigh, Tenchi realized he'd just have to trust them.
"OK, everyone, he's not here. But just DON'T LEAVE THE SHRINE. Whatever you do, for the Love of God, do NOT go outside, OK?" he asked. Six heads that looked just like his nodded. Tenchi sighed. "Thanks--I'll be back around 3. If you need food, grandpa's got food in the fridge--and if he comes back, try to explain."
"What's wrong, Tenchi?" Kimiko, the girl who sat next to him in class, asked as they waited for math class to start. "You've been out of it all morning."
"Oh, nothing," Tenchi replied, sweatdropping. His mind raced with possibilities--either Washu had fixed everything, or far more likely, Washu had fixed nothing, the Tenchis were out and causing immeasurable damage to his reputation. All the girls would hate him, or love him, or much, much worse...
"You look kind of pale," Kimiko said, looking concerned.
"No, I'm fine, really," Tenchi said, managing a nervous grin that made him look anything but fine. Kimiko was about to reply when the teacher walked in to start the class. Tenchi glanced over at Kimiko--she was an attractive girl, with blond shoulder-length hair and blue-green eyes that looked like the color of the ocean somewhere tropical. If he was a normal guy, he'd be making passes at her and not worrying about Washu, clones of himself, carrot-mad cabbits, and space pirates and princesses conspiring to blow up his house. Then again, he had to admit ordinary girls just seemed...too ordinary compared to the girls back home. Although Washu's inventions he could definitely do without.
When the chimes rang for the end of class, Tenchi ran to the window, jumped out in front of his shocked classmates, fell two stories, landed perfectly, and broke into a mad dash back towards home. He realized jumping out the window probably should have killed him, but he had an urgent mission. He had no idea what would be waiting for him when he got home, but somehow he knew it would be very, very bad. He took the steps to the shrine two at a time, and sprinted up to its door.
"I'm home!" he called, sliding open the door to the shrine. "Guys?" he asked, wondering if one of his selves was enough of a practical joker to get the rest to hide from him. He looked around everywhere, in a panic--they were gone.
"Washu must have gotten rid of them," Tenchi said to himself. "Thank Go--" he stopped as he heard two people laughing. Mihoshi was one of them--and the other person laughing was him. And real Tenchi's lips weren't moving.
Tenchi rushed outside, just in time to see Mihoshi with Peach Tenchi, laughing at something one of them had said.
"Tenchi, you're so funny," Mihoshi said, playfully batting his arm.
"No, you are, you're hilarious," Peach Tenchi said. "I can't think of the last time I laughed so hard, but I guess I'm normally kind of a tightas--hey, Tenchi!" he said, suddenly noticing the real Tenchi.
"Is this your brother?" Mihoshi asked him.
"Kind of," real Tenchi said. "Can I talk to you for a second?" he said as menacingly as he could to Peach Tenchi.
"Sure," Peach replied. He turned to Mihoshi. "See you soon--is 6:00 OK?"
"I'll be there," Mihoshi replied, blushing, then turning and walking down the steps, humming the background music for a TV commercial as she walked.
"Six o'clock? What's happening at six o'clock??" real Tenchi asked.
"We've got a date--we're going to that new burger place in town. You never take the girls out, and it's mean to have Sasami cook all the time. It'll be fun," Peach Tenchi said, smiling. Tenchi looked at Peach Tenchi and wondered how anyone with even a shred of his personality could be so relaxed.
"What happened to what I told you? Staying in the shrine? Where's everyone else?" Tenchi asked.
"Yeah, we got bored," Peach Tenchi said. "I mean, grandpa doesn't even have a PlayStation," he added. Tenchi's heart rate tripled in panic. He could just see Red Tenchi going up to Ryoko, using some cheesy line, and 30 seconds later he'd be doing...well, they'd be well on their way to making mini-Tenchis.
"Where's Red Tenchi?" Tenchi asked.
"He went towards the house," Peach Tenchi said. "Then I ran into Mihoshi, so I didn't see him after that."
Tenchi was already running towards the house by the time Peach finished his sentence. Would Ryoko desert him? The thought made him feel like he'd been punched in the stomach. It wasn't even really deserting him, it was just a different Tenchi who was a pain in the ass. Then there were the other girls--he wondered if they all had dates with him just like Mihoshi.
"Tenchi!" Tenchi yelled, opening the door to the house and feeling kind of silly for calling his own name. "Washu? Anyone home?" he called, quickly slipping off his shoes and hurrying into the living room. It was empty, but a chill ran down Tenchi's spine as he heard his own laugh, coming from the backyard. Tenchi ran for the back door, slid open the screen door and saw something he hadn't expected.
"Tenchi?" Aeka said, looking at him with a confused look on her face. Her and Pale Green Tenchi were sitting across from each other, having tea together. Even though Pale Green was a copy of him, Tenchi still felt a small pang of jealously--although it was quickly replaced by fear, because he doubted Red would be happy just having tea with Ryoko.
"Where's Red?" Tenchi asked Pale Green.
"I'm sure I have no idea," Pale Green Tenchi replied. "The princess and I were just enjoying tea--" Tenchi turned and ran back inside, trying to think of where Red would go. He stopped at Washu's lab and pulled on the door handle. If Red Tenchi wanted to take Ryoko somewhere private, it didn't get more remote than a lab in another dimension. Tenchi pounded on the door.
"Open up!" Tenchi yelled. The door opened a crack, and Purple Tenchi stuck his head out.
"Um--can you come back later?" Purple asked, sweatdropping. Tenchi noticed Purple was wearing a bathrobe with a little chibi-Washu embroidered on the pocket.
"Is Washu in there?" Tenchi asked.
"I'm working on the solution!" Washu's voice called. "Don't worry, everything will be fine!"
"Washu!" Tenchi called through the door, not wanting to go in and see her in her nurse's outfit or worse. "Where's Ryoko?"
"I don't know, I'm kind of busy right now," Washu called back.
Tenchi gave Purple a hostile glare, then turned and ran outside of the house, towards the carrot fields. There was a small shed near there--he didn't want to think of what Red Tenchi might be trying to pull on Ryoko right now.
He got halfway there, before he saw Sasami--walking down a path through the woods with himself. Tenchi ran after them, and caught up with Sasami and Yellow Tenchi.
"What do you think you're doing?" Tenchi asked Yellow. Yellow and Sasami looked at each other, puzzled expressions on their faces, then back at Tenchi.
"We were just going for a walk," Yellow Tenchi said. Tenchi noticed something was wrong with Yellow--the other Tenchis were perfect copies but this one was a little shorter, maybe a little younger also.
"That's all?" Tenchi asked warily.
"What's wrong, Tenchi?" Sasami said. "You're all red--have you been running?"
"Um--have you seen Ryoko?" Tenchi asked. Sasami and Yellow Tenchi shook their heads. "Red Tenchi?"
"No--I haven't seen Ryoko-oneesan or him since lunch," Sasami said.
"Were they with each other?" Tenchi asked, feeling a stab of panic.
"He was talking to her, but when we left everyone was still eating lunch," Sasami said.
"Thanks," Tenchi said, abruptly turning and running back towards the fields. The sun was beating down and sweat was starting to trickle down his face, but he kept running as hard as he could on sheer adrenaline. Almost out of breath, he finally reached the shed by the fields, and threw open the door.
"Ryoko!" Tenchi called. It was empty. He quickly searched to make sure they weren't just hiding somewhere, then sighed and went back outside. He looked in all directions--there was no sign of anyone, just the chirping of birds and insects. He felt like he'd been hit in the stomach--Mihoshi, Aeka, Sasami, Washu, probably even Kiyone and Ryoko although he hadn't found them yet--they all seemed happier with his duplicates than the real thing. Tenchi tried to think of where else Red Tenchi would go--and tried not to think about if he'd be able to get there in time.
[That's it for chapter 2--hope you enjoyed it!]