I do not own the wheel of time. I do not own anything.
* * * * * *
1 Lanfear's Day
Rand hears a knock on his door. That is odd, he thought. No one but the Seanchan, Athan'Miere, and Cadsuane have an appointment to chew me out today, and they have already been. Rand opened the door. It was Lanfear.
Rand: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH
Lanfear: Shut up Lews Therin
MDV (mysterious disembodied voice): I don't like typing your name Lews Therin/Rand Al'Thor so you are now the DR (dragon reborn). Your name makes my computer sick. Lanfear, you are L so that DR doesn't feel left out.
DR and L: OK. WAIT A SECOND YOU DIDN'T ASK OUR PERMISSION
MDV: So?
DR: Well after being the next thing to omnipotent, I'm kind of used to getting my permission asked…
MDV: And?
DR: sighs
MDV: back to the story
DR and L: sighs
MDV: I SAID ACTION
DR: But, but Lanfear, you're DEAD
1.1 L: by the way, my name's not Lanfear anymore, it's Cyduane
DR: that means the MDV will have to call you C
The DR is mysteriously whipped with a belt
L/C: hehe
D inside the DR's head: HEY ONLY I CAN SAY HEHE
L/C: SORRY
MDV: back to the story
1.2 DR: but how did you get resurrected
L/C: the Dark One
DR: aren't you supposed to call him the Great Lord?
L/C: consults her script- yah sorry… the Great Lord
DR: well ok…
Min from the DR's sitting room: Randsy poo who are you talking to
DR: UMM..
L/C: YOU HAVE BEEN CHEATING ON ME LEWS THERIN
DR: ummm we've been broken up 3, 215 years, 8 months, 2 weeks, 5 days, 13 hours, 21 seconds, and 91 mila seconds
L/C: hmmmm
Elayne, Min, and Avi: YOU HAD ANOTHER GIRLFRIEND
DR: I didn't think you would be annoyed…
E M A: WELL WE ARE
Mat walks up saving the DR from eternal death
MC to DR: what a chick (talking about the very beautiful L) how did you manage to get all the good ones
DR: actually, she's yours
L: WHAT?
DR: yep, Mat, unlike me will tell you how beautiful you are etc.
MC: have you noticed our names have gotten abbreviated?
DR: yes
The DR is whipped again
DR: HE BROUGHT IT UP
The DR is whipped yet again
MC: I love to cause you pain
DR: why?
MC: you are making me look after Elayne
DR: hehe muawhahahahahaha
MC: you are insane
DR: yes
E M A: hey, Don't call Randsy poo insane, he is…
MC: Sa souraya manain niende ye
Everyone: What?
MC: I don't know, the phrase popped into my head
Everyone but MC: ok
MC goes out with L/C and it is many months till he finds out she is one of the Forsaken. He goes out and beats up Moridin because L/C doesn't like him. He then becomes Nae'blis (after dedicating his soul to the DO/GL) and the world is destroyed but everyone is happy because Mat is still alive, DR and Elayne are dead, and Mat divorced Tuon.
And Mat lived happily ever after. And so did Lanfear/ Cyduane.
* * * * * *
1 Lanfear's Day
Rand hears a knock on his door. That is odd, he thought. No one but the Seanchan, Athan'Miere, and Cadsuane have an appointment to chew me out today, and they have already been. Rand opened the door. It was Lanfear.
Rand: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH
Lanfear: Shut up Lews Therin
MDV (mysterious disembodied voice): I don't like typing your name Lews Therin/Rand Al'Thor so you are now the DR (dragon reborn). Your name makes my computer sick. Lanfear, you are L so that DR doesn't feel left out.
DR and L: OK. WAIT A SECOND YOU DIDN'T ASK OUR PERMISSION
MDV: So?
DR: Well after being the next thing to omnipotent, I'm kind of used to getting my permission asked…
MDV: And?
DR: sighs
MDV: back to the story
DR and L: sighs
MDV: I SAID ACTION
DR: But, but Lanfear, you're DEAD
1.1 L: by the way, my name's not Lanfear anymore, it's Cyduane
DR: that means the MDV will have to call you C
The DR is mysteriously whipped with a belt
L/C: hehe
D inside the DR's head: HEY ONLY I CAN SAY HEHE
L/C: SORRY
MDV: back to the story
1.2 DR: but how did you get resurrected
L/C: the Dark One
DR: aren't you supposed to call him the Great Lord?
L/C: consults her script- yah sorry… the Great Lord
DR: well ok…
Min from the DR's sitting room: Randsy poo who are you talking to
DR: UMM..
L/C: YOU HAVE BEEN CHEATING ON ME LEWS THERIN
DR: ummm we've been broken up 3, 215 years, 8 months, 2 weeks, 5 days, 13 hours, 21 seconds, and 91 mila seconds
L/C: hmmmm
Elayne, Min, and Avi: YOU HAD ANOTHER GIRLFRIEND
DR: I didn't think you would be annoyed…
E M A: WELL WE ARE
Mat walks up saving the DR from eternal death
MC to DR: what a chick (talking about the very beautiful L) how did you manage to get all the good ones
DR: actually, she's yours
L: WHAT?
DR: yep, Mat, unlike me will tell you how beautiful you are etc.
MC: have you noticed our names have gotten abbreviated?
DR: yes
The DR is whipped again
DR: HE BROUGHT IT UP
The DR is whipped yet again
MC: I love to cause you pain
DR: why?
MC: you are making me look after Elayne
DR: hehe muawhahahahahaha
MC: you are insane
DR: yes
E M A: hey, Don't call Randsy poo insane, he is…
MC: Sa souraya manain niende ye
Everyone: What?
MC: I don't know, the phrase popped into my head
Everyone but MC: ok
MC goes out with L/C and it is many months till he finds out she is one of the Forsaken. He goes out and beats up Moridin because L/C doesn't like him. He then becomes Nae'blis (after dedicating his soul to the DO/GL) and the world is destroyed but everyone is happy because Mat is still alive, DR and Elayne are dead, and Mat divorced Tuon.
And Mat lived happily ever after. And so did Lanfear/ Cyduane.