Our story takes place a long, long time ago. I can still remember how that music used to make me smile. I knew if I had my chance, that I could make those people- n'er mind. Wrong story.

Anyways, on with the real story. This story takes place many, many years before Arianna. Even before the Sunchaser was born. A mare named Gaea was the link to the animals. But I digress. That has nothing to do with this story.

Atalanta had just given birth to her first foal. Her foal was a colt, a small, knobby-kneed little fellow. His mane puffed out in all directions, making him look comical.

She smiled at him. "You're beautiful," she whispered, nuzzling him.

"Atalanta!" A voice boomed. "Are you okay?" A golden figure appeared on the horizon, galloping towards the mare and foal.

"Yes, Numinor, I'm okay," she said softly, her voice like bells. He paused at her side and whinnied.

"My son has been born." His voice was filled with awe as he looked upon the small creature.

"Yes. And he will be named…" she paused. "Golden Ratio."

Golden Ratio was a very special unicorn

Born to Numinor and Atalanta

He had a great destiny to fulfill

But right all he wanted was to play-a!

All of the other unicorns

Used to laugh and call him names

The never let poor Golden Ratio

Join in any unicorn - What the heck? We got off track, didn't we?

Anyways, Golden Ratio was a very special unicorn. This little unicorn had the very special power of making everyone light-hearted and happy! No wait, that's not the right story. Okay, now we're back on track.

Golden Ratio grew to be a fine stallion. He was 16 hands tall with a glowing gold coat. His mane and tail were flowing crimson, and his horn was like a silver sword. At the base of his horn was a diamond with a faint reddish orange hue to it.

But, un-like his parents, he showed no special ability. He was strong, but many stallions were stronger. His leadership abilities were lacking. He wasn't too polite and had no patience for magic.

But he did have a very important destiny.

Golden Ratio hated the Shadow Unicorns. His best friend, an orange stallion name Casin, had been forced to become a Shadow. Every since then, the burning hatred had been harbored in his soul.

So when Gully, the Link, had reported that some Shadow Unicorns had crossed the gap and were terrorizing people there, in was small wonder that he volunteered to go.

Atalanta didn't want him to, for she was fearful that he would not return.

"Please Golden Ratio, you are still a colt to me. Don't go! I fear you will die!"

But despite her pleas, or maybe because of them, he went anyway.

Crossing over the gap was a most disturbing experience. He felt like part of his body, the part that made him a unicorn, wanted to leave him. Once on the other side, he shook his head once before going off to find the Shadow unicorns.

He didn't have to look hard. They had left a clear trail of where they had gone. All around their trail were confused people, sitting down and doing... math?

Golden Ratio whinnied fearfully. Oh no! he thought. Don't tell me they introduced math to this land! He ran as fast as he could, desperate to catch up with them.

"Hey, looky here what I found!" A harsh mare's voice filled his ears seconds before a piercing pain shoot through his back. Screaming his pain, his reared and pawed the air.

"We got ourselves a Celestial." Turning, he saw three shadow unicorns: one mare and two stallions.

"Who are you and why are you here?" he demanded, holding his head high. One of the stallions laughed.

"We're not stupid," he said, leering. "We won't tell you who we are. But we're here on an evil mission."

"Yeah," the second stallion added in. "We introduced MATH to this world."

"NO!" Golden Ratio gasped. "How could you?"

The mare giggled. "Oh, but it's worse. We also placed a spell that will introduce Algebra, Geometry, Trig, and Calculus!" All three unicorns began to laugh, a harsh, cruel sound.

"NOOO!" Screaming, Golden Ratio turned and ran, trying to get away from the demons. Math, he thought. How could they be so heartless?

"Run as fast as you can, little unicorn, but we will catch you!" the mare screamed from behind him.

A few hours later he stopped running, sure that the Shadows hadn't been able to keep up. He stood there for a moment, straining his ears to see if he could hear them, but there were no hoofbeats. Satisfied, he went off at an easy trot.

|Hello my son|

He jumped and whirled around. "Who are you?" he demanded. "Show yourself!"

|I cannot, for I am only here within you|

"Wha?"

|Do you wish to save these people from the horrors of Math?|

He whinnied. "Yes, of course! No one should have to suffer the horrors of Math!"

|Then are you willing to become the spirit to help them?|

He paused, unsure. "What do you mean?"

|Give up your freedom with your life, and rescue these poor people|

He nodded. "I see. That is what I came here to do, so I will."

A light flared around him, and in an instant he was gone. Or so it seemed. But where he was standing was a piece of white paper, lying on the ground. On it was the formula for the Golden Ratio, able to make the most pleasing Golden Rectangle.

And it was in this way that we have something good from Math. All because of the brave work of the fearless unicorn, Golden Ratio.

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Authors Note: This is a pretty poor excuse for a fanfic, but we suppose it will suffice. I mean, it's better then angst, right? We hope you realize this is humor, but if you find it stupid it's okay - we wholeheartedly agree! All of the poking fun at "American Pie", Rudolf the Red-Nosed Reindeer, and Unico were not meant to insult anyone. Have a nice day!

Beatrix n_n and Faye =^-^=