**Disclaimer: This is our pitiful attempt at being funny. If you have a
problem with it, stop reading the story because we really don't want to
hear you bitching about whatever it is we did wrong. Newsies belongs to
Disney- Disney is a corporate whore. We own Angela, Angela is a whore.
This story is purely for entertainment. We are (quite obviously) not
making money off of it. A damn shame too. Flames are NOT appreciated, nor
taken seriously. Please keep your arms and legs inside the vehicle at all
times. Enjoy the ride. ~ Alix and Heather**
When Angela went home that night she saw her father had beaten her mother up. He turned to her in a fit of rage, "LOOK WHAT YOU DID!" He shouted angrily. She gasped in horror. How could her father do something like this? They had always been a model family: happy and (insert word here). Then he tried to kill her, but Angela ran upstairs and locked herself in her room. (A/N: Everyone knows that doors are all-powerful and can never be broken down, or unlocked.)(A/N: We had to have someone out to kill her.) She realized then that she would have to run away. Her father was like a deranged crazed weasel that wouldn't stop until it got what it wanted. (A/N: Heather has an obsession with deranged weasels.) But what could she do? She had never had a job. Then it hit her like lightening (A/N: and they say lightening never strikes the same spot twice.) She would become a newsie! Of course everyone wanted to be in a lower class position with street rats, making hardly enough money to survive off of.
She grabbed her brother's low class newsie garb and hat that he happened to have on hand because he sometimes liked slumming with them. Then she jumped out the window, cutting herself all over with the glass. She later realized that this was not the sneakiest, nor smartest, way to make an escape. But she was past caring- she just wanted freedom. The two- story fall kinda hurt though. (A/N: But, like, HELLO! Chimbos are invincible.) She then managed to find the Brooklyn lodging house, even though she had never been there. She got there in the black of night in a very rainy month. (A/N: It's raining? Since when? Oh yes, part of the cliché.) She started to feel sorry for herself and sat down on the steps and started bawling like a baby. (A/N: Which is really quite annoying, and a good way to get attention.)
Jack Kelly, who just happened to be in Brooklyn, found her on the steps. He immediately fell in love with her. (A/N: I'll never let go Jack, I'll never let go. *Looks sheepish* Wrong story, sorry.) "MARRY ME!" He shouted within 2 seconds of meeting her. Who could resist? He had fallen in love with her, who wouldn't? She was irresistible! (A/N: Hums Irresistible by Jessica Simpson until Heath throws a shoe at her.) She looked at Jack, surprised. He was cute, but not as cute as Spot. "Go away you reject!" she shouted. Then she started to bawl again. Jack was so deeply in love with her he dumped Sarah that very minute. (A/N: Where exactly is Sarah?) "How can I help you?" (A/N: He has lost his NY accent because I am just too darn lazy to put it in.) "You can't! Go away and let me look pathetic so someone else will notice me!"
"Whatever you wish," Jack said, still entranced. He then ran down the street to go cry and plot how to take over Brooklyn so he could marry Angela. (A/N: How exactly does he know she belongs in Brooklyn and likes Spot?) (A/N, Heather: It's because Jack knows everything) (A/N: I forgot, he is the almighty leader of Manhattan *bows*.)
I know all too! I know that you are DYING to read the next chapter!
When Angela went home that night she saw her father had beaten her mother up. He turned to her in a fit of rage, "LOOK WHAT YOU DID!" He shouted angrily. She gasped in horror. How could her father do something like this? They had always been a model family: happy and (insert word here). Then he tried to kill her, but Angela ran upstairs and locked herself in her room. (A/N: Everyone knows that doors are all-powerful and can never be broken down, or unlocked.)(A/N: We had to have someone out to kill her.) She realized then that she would have to run away. Her father was like a deranged crazed weasel that wouldn't stop until it got what it wanted. (A/N: Heather has an obsession with deranged weasels.) But what could she do? She had never had a job. Then it hit her like lightening (A/N: and they say lightening never strikes the same spot twice.) She would become a newsie! Of course everyone wanted to be in a lower class position with street rats, making hardly enough money to survive off of.
She grabbed her brother's low class newsie garb and hat that he happened to have on hand because he sometimes liked slumming with them. Then she jumped out the window, cutting herself all over with the glass. She later realized that this was not the sneakiest, nor smartest, way to make an escape. But she was past caring- she just wanted freedom. The two- story fall kinda hurt though. (A/N: But, like, HELLO! Chimbos are invincible.) She then managed to find the Brooklyn lodging house, even though she had never been there. She got there in the black of night in a very rainy month. (A/N: It's raining? Since when? Oh yes, part of the cliché.) She started to feel sorry for herself and sat down on the steps and started bawling like a baby. (A/N: Which is really quite annoying, and a good way to get attention.)
Jack Kelly, who just happened to be in Brooklyn, found her on the steps. He immediately fell in love with her. (A/N: I'll never let go Jack, I'll never let go. *Looks sheepish* Wrong story, sorry.) "MARRY ME!" He shouted within 2 seconds of meeting her. Who could resist? He had fallen in love with her, who wouldn't? She was irresistible! (A/N: Hums Irresistible by Jessica Simpson until Heath throws a shoe at her.) She looked at Jack, surprised. He was cute, but not as cute as Spot. "Go away you reject!" she shouted. Then she started to bawl again. Jack was so deeply in love with her he dumped Sarah that very minute. (A/N: Where exactly is Sarah?) "How can I help you?" (A/N: He has lost his NY accent because I am just too darn lazy to put it in.) "You can't! Go away and let me look pathetic so someone else will notice me!"
"Whatever you wish," Jack said, still entranced. He then ran down the street to go cry and plot how to take over Brooklyn so he could marry Angela. (A/N: How exactly does he know she belongs in Brooklyn and likes Spot?) (A/N, Heather: It's because Jack knows everything) (A/N: I forgot, he is the almighty leader of Manhattan *bows*.)
I know all too! I know that you are DYING to read the next chapter!