Title: Dr. Love Makes A House Call
Author: Charlene Edwards
Rated: PG
Disclaimer: DC owns, DC does stupid things with them, so I'm addressing the stupid things DC caused in JLL.
Synopsis: Dick and Babs relationship is strained due to the events of JLL. So, Dr. Love makes a house call. This was written for the Hearts and Arrows Valentines Day contest. LOL -- believe it or not, it actually won. I hope you all enjoy. Charlene :-)
Dr. Love Makes A House Call:
"Titans Tower, we save the world for a price."
"Shut up Roy and listen to me," Dinah Lance's irritated voice came over the line.
"Well hey! What's up?"
"I need you to come to Gotham."
Roy stretched his eyes as he felt his mouth twist. "Gotham? Why?"
"You're friends with Nightwing, right?"
"Uh huh."
"You want to help him out?"
"Yeah, if he's in trouble."
"Well I'm personally going to kick his damn fine all over Bludhaven for hurting Oracle. So, IF you want to help your friend I suggest that you come to Gotham, don't tell him you're coming and help me with my plan."
Roy took his head out of his hand, he could feel a headache starting, "You have a plan?"
"Yes I have a plan. Now I expect you here to help. UNLESS you want to see me kick Nightwing's --"
"I"m on my way. Should Lian stay here or can she visit Grandma Dinah?"
"ROY! We have a crisis. Bring Lian next time."
***********************************************************************
Dick Grayson sat at the computer in his apartment researching an arms shipment that had been stolen. He knew Roland Desmond had a hand in it. He just didn't have any evidence to tie the theft to him. The research was going slower than he had hoped. Damn. If he could only call Barbara. But, he couldn't call Barbara. Things were -- what had he told Tim -- "strained". And Tim. Where the hell was Tim when he needed him? He was in chemistry class. What a wuss.
There was a loud knock at his door. He shook his head. No one ever used his doorbell. No, everyone had to try to knock his door down. Grumbling, he stood up and crossed the room, taking the five steps up to his door two at a time. "Yeah," Dick said as he opened the door.
"Dude, you look bad. What's up?" Roy asked as he let himself in the apartment. He noticed how disheveled Dick's hair was and the stubble on his face. Personally Roy liked stubble. However, it looked a lot better on him than on Dick, but then, he couldn't help it he was so hot.
"Roy? What're you doing here?"
"Dude, I gotta be in Gotham tonight. Dinah's fixing me up with this hot babe friend of hers."
"Really ... that's nice," Dick said absentmindedly as he shut the door and followed Roy back into the apartment. "So, you came to Gotham for a date and to Bludhaven to say hi."
"Yep. That's what I did. I couldn't be so close and not drop in on you. Share my good fortune."
"Good fortune?" Dick asked as he checked his computer search. Still searching. He turned around and saw Roy raiding his refrigerator.
"Yeah, man. The girl just broke up with her boyfriend cuz he's been acting like a jerk AND Dinah says this babe just rocks. OH and she's a redhead. Now that's good fortune," Roy replied as he opened a beer and started drinking. He moved over to Dick's too silent CD player and, finding the new Creed CD, he slipped it in and turned up the volume.
"Good for you Roy. Thanks for dropping by and sharing with me. But I don't want to keep you, so, if you're going to go, go. I've got things to do. A little computer research."
"I thought you and the Oracle were tight and she did all your research -- "
"Who said Oracle's a she?"
"You do the way you blush every time you talk to her and we've ALL caught you flirting with her over the Tower's computers. Hell, I've recorded some of it."
"Roy, just go on your date. Have a nice time," Dick said as he turned and started for his computer. He knew Roy could show himself out. He also knew he probably wouldn't.
"I'm going, but I don't have to be there for an hour. Gonna pour on the old Harper charm and Ms Gordon's gonna be eating outta my hand."
Dick spun around. "Gordon? Barbara Gordon?"
Roy grinned, "Yeah, you know her?"
"Do I know her? Yes, I know her AND Babs and her boyfriend haven't broken up!"
"Dude, according to Dinah - they're history!" Roy said as he plopped down on the sofa.
Dick's mouth opened indignantly but no sound came out. Then he stalked over in front of Roy, shaking his finger, "History? Where did she ... OH no they are not! Things may be a bit STRAINED but they are NOT history!"
"Dude, if she's a friend of yours maybe you haven't heard, but she and this jerk are history. OVER. Kaput. Seems that this idiot did something he can't get over. Barbara went over to see him and this idiot threw the girl outta his apartment. Soooo, according to Dinah -- and she knows what she's talking about -- they're history. History as in he is HISTORY!! I looooovvvve 'em when they're on the rebound. Man, the bum threw this girl out of his apartment... What an Idiot! Who'd be stupid enough to do -- "
"She is NOT on the rebound! I am NOT history!" Dick shouted. "You are NOT going AND I did NOT throw her out! She thinks I threw her out?"
"OOoooh, so you're the idiot! Sorry, man ... you snooze, you loose!"
"Yeah -- No -- I am not an idiot. Babs and I haven't broken up."
"WELLL, according to the bird, you guys are toast!"
"Roy, listen to me VERY carefully, you are NOT going out with Babs."
"Dude, you aren't the boss of me!" Roy said as Dick's ice blue eyes glared at him. "Well, okay, maybe you kind of are, but not right now! Not about this."
"No? Well I can very painfully break every bone in your body."
Roy smiled wickedly at Dick, "Yeah, but ya won't and ya know why?"
"Why?" Dick said pouting as he stomped across the room to his computer.
"'Cause that would make you a bigger ass than you already are. Dude, you threw your girlfriend out of your apartment. Did you learn nothin' from me?"
Dick turned around and glared at Roy as he opens his connection with Oracle. Her icon, rather than Barbara's face, appeared on his screen. "DON'T give me that icon -- show yourself. We gotta talk! BABS!"
"Oooh man, don't do that!" Roy said as he jumped up from the sofa and ran to the computer. "Ya hurt her, ya have to woo her back and not treat her like a dog to come when you call."
"Babs," Dick whined, "are you gonna talk to me?"
Roy closed the connection on the computer by pulling the plug from the wall. "Dude, she's gettin' read for her date - let it go."
Dick darted his eyes from Roy to the computer which was flashing Oracle's icon before the screen went blank. Dick felt his anger rising. In his best use of The Voice he growled, "You are NOT going out with her!"
"Woah! Simmer down the Bat temper tantrum, buddy ...We're buds right?"
"I thought we were," Dick replied petulantly.
Roy sighed. "For a smart guy, Rob, you can be so dim. Yes, we're buds ...You're personal cupid is here for you." Roy threw his arms wide and grinned at Dick.
"Personal ... Cupid? Oh God, I'm doomed."
"Roy's gonna take care of ever'thin'. I'm gonna help you and Dinah - it'll be Roytastic!"
Dick whimpered. "How did Dinah TALK Babs into this? A date with ... YOU?"
"Weeeell, you know Dinah, she's not real big on the permission part. She kind of just charged ahead."
"And you're going to help me exactly how?"
"The ABC's of Love - Dr. Love is in and I'm makin' a house call." Dick whimpered again as he made his way back to his sofa and fell, rather than sat, down on it. Undeterred, Roy continued. "First things first, loose both uniforms and go civies - chicks dig a man who is casual."
Dick was shaking his head, "Dr --- LOVE? Casual okay."
"Next forget anythin' Bruce ever told ya about women."
Dick rolled eyes at Roy. "Like he TALKS about women."
"You've got an expert here now and I know how to make even you look good! Now, where are her favorite places?"
"Places -- I can't ever get her outta that tower -- I dunno -- what types of places?"
Roy now rolled his eyes at Dick. "Dude, not those places. PLACES. You know behind the knees, the crook of the elbows, the soft curve of her delicious neck. Give me details!"
"WHY do I want to give you details if you're still planning on going out with my girl? I don't want to help you 'score' with Babs!"
Roy looked at Dick with a wolfish grin. "Well, I gotta get somethin' out of this!"
"NOT with MY girl you don't!" Dick yelled as he started to stand up.
Roy pushed him back on the sofa with a sigh. "Well, your possessive that must mean you care."
"Of course I care ... I ... I ... I MORE than care. I love her. Roy, this isn't some fly by night thing. I really love Babs."
"Man, you haven't shown it to her. She thinks you abandoned her. I'm thinkin' I'd dump you on your ass, if I was her."
Dick stared at his shoes as his chest tightened. Had he really blown it? Had he lost her? "I have shown her how I feel, I have. Man, right before all that STUFF with the Joker, I forced her out on a date, we drove up and watched the changing leaves. I even threw her cell phone away."
"Oh, that's a real good way to show her you care. What's that the When-You-Care-Enough-To-Destroy-Personal-Property phase?" Roy quipped.
Dick continued. "It's just -- well -- you KNOW what I did! Everyone knows what I did. And I just well ... I'm not good enough anymore ... for her."
"You're a hero, through and through. I wouldn't stand beside someone that I didn't think wasn't good enough --"
"No you'd just sleep with 'em," Dick flippantly replied.
"Oh I get it," Roy said all knowingly. "You took care of her. But, when she sees you hurtin' you turn all Bat on her and throw her away. Look, get this through your thick Bat skull. Dick, man, you did what you had to do ... It's over. No permanent damage to the scum bag. Stop doin' this to you and to her. Don't give up on yourself and don't just throw her away."
"I didn't throw her away. Contrary to Dinah's opinion, I did NOT kick her out of my apartment. I had to go to work."
"It's not Dinah's opinion that matters, it's Babs. And she knows that you could be late to work to talk to her."
Dick looked back at the floor. God he was messed up. He kept hurting people around him. He looked up at Roy with sad blue eyes. "Sorry ... I ... I'm sorry. I shouldn't have said that to you ..."
"Dude, look no worries. I completely understand a mouth running without engaging the brain. Happens to me ALL the time. Man, you need help. We all do sometimes. Some of us more than others ... let her help you. Hey, is the mouth overloading your you-know-what kinda what happened with Barbara?"
"Yeah. I guess my elevator comment kinda was uncalled for."
"Elevator comment?"
"She surprised me. Came over for a surprise visit. I kinda sorta told her not to make a habit of surprising me and not to make me sorry I put an elevator in this building," Dick said sheepishly.
Roy's took a serious tone, "Dude, man that was harsh. The old Dick wouldn't have said that and this new Dick definitely sucks."
Dick dropped his head in his hand. "I know, I know. I just don't know what to do. What'da I do?"
Roy kneels in front of Dick, taking his friends hands in his, "Dick, buddy, listen to me. You're the best of the best. But you have to understand that sometimes, you can't carry the world. Sometimes you have to let others who care help. Let her help you. I'm going to give you two pieces of advice. The first comes from me, your pal ...You go to her and talk to her and tell her she was right and listen to her. Do what she asks you to do. You apologize and beg for forgiveness."
"And what's the second piece of advice, oh sage for the lovelorn?"
"This is from DR. LOVE, you bring scented candles, oils and go to those places she likes and make her feel like you're the best thing that ever happened to her. Then you enjoy each other. Man, you deserve the best too." Roy smiled at his friend, then slapping Dick on the leg as he continued, "Then you write down all the details for the lovemiester, namely me, and share!"
"I ... I can do that. Except -- there's ONE problem. She's NOT speaking to me and she's going on a date with you. Well, I guess that's two problems."
"Nah, man - no problem. We're goin' to give her a night out with the guy of her dreams and then we'll sub you."
"Gee thanks! Where were you gonna take her or had you and Dinah planned that far ahead in this little scheme to bring me to my senses?"
"Dude, I never plan -- you just go with the flow. It'll be great."
"So -- uh -- what're we gonna do? Have me show up instead of you -- for the date? Does Babs EVEN know about this date?"
Roy scratches head. "Hmm ... you know the details were a little fuzzy there. That was the Bird's bit. I'm jus' supposed to show up if you don't come to your senses and stop being an idiot; a twerp; a dweeb; a moron -- "
"I GET your meaning! Thank you!"
"My pleasure." Roy flashed his wolfish grin again and rubbed his hands together. "Noooow, let's talk toys."
"TOYS?" Dick asked as he looked at Roy incredulously. "What toys?"
"Well, if you're going to make her happy you have to have toys ... adult toys -- "
"What! What're you --"
"Now Batboy who really needs help in the toy department, I'm gonna help you out with my little bag of LOVE ... it'll have all the incidentals in it." Dick smacked his forehead as Roy pulled his backpack off the sofa and started going through it. "Let's see here -- candles, oils, and candy - she like chocolate or somethin' like jellybeans -- I got an assortment."
Dick's eyes narrowed as he watched his friend. "Roy, how the hell did you come up with all this stuff on short notice? You were planning on trying to seduce Babs. That's what you were planning?"
Roy looked up at Dick sympathetically. "No man, I may not have been a bat scout, but I was a boy scout, I'm always prepared. I am DR. LOVE."
***********************************************************************
"Dinah!" Barbara growled as she watched Dinah Lance throwing her clothes from her closet onto her bed.
"You've got to have something decent in this closet."
"FOR?"
"For your date."
"What date?"
"The one I made for you," Dinah said as she turned around with a smile. "You barely have anything in here that could pass for romantic dress up clothes!"
Barbara looked at Dinah incredulously. Her mouth dropped open. "You. Did. What?"
"I made you a date. You've been holed up in this apartment sulking ever since pretty boy dumped you."
"He didn't dump -- "
"Whatever, whatever. Anyway. I know this nice guy, he needs someone nice, you need someone nice. So I set you two up."
Barbara sighed. "You didn't. You set me up on a blind date without letting me know. When is this so-called date? Call and cancel."
Dinah turned around with Barbara's long blue dress in hand. It was sleeveless with a ball gown skirt. "Can't. He's already on his way. We've got to hustle to get you ready. I think you should wear your hair up."
"I'm not going," Barbara said flatly.
"Yes you are. You can't say no. It'll break his heart. He came ALL the way from New York."
Barbara's eyes grew wide. "Roy! You set me up on a blind date with ROY HARPER! Dinah are you insane?"
Dinah pouted her lips at Barbara. "Come on. It'll be fun. He's really a good guy and he's had bad luck in the romance department. But he really is --"
"He's ROY! Oh Dinah," Barbara sighed. "And I have work to do. Oracle stuff you know."
"Please," Dinah said giving Barbara her best puppy dog eyes. "I'll handle the Oracle stuff."
Barbara stared at Dinah.
"Oh okay, so I can't turn on the computer thingies. I'll call Robin and HE'LL handle the Oracle stuff. He should like that. He can send Batman on wild goose chases all night."
Barbara giggled. "Oh alright. Dinner. I'll go with him to dinner. I guess I can go to dinner with Roy for that."
Dinah squealed with delight. "Oh I'm going to fix you up so pretty."
Barbara rolled her eyes and sighed. This was going to be a long night.
***********************************************************************
Dinah answered Barbara's door to see Roy standing there with flowers. Dinah pushed him into the hall, "What the hell are you DOING here? You were suppose to get junior mister grim and grumpy off his -- "
"He'll be at the restaurant. I'm just gonna whisk her there and we'll substitute her dates at that point and the best man'll lose. Everything's gonna work out as planned."
"It better!"
"Well, if it doesn't, it's not our fault. All we can do is bring 'em together. You know horses, water, can't make them drink."
"Grr. Get in there," Dinah said as she grabbed him by the arm and pulled him into the apartment. "Babs! Your date's here!"
"Yelling into the next room. That was subtle Dinah," Roy laughed as she punched him in the arm. "Hey, why don't'cha meet me at the Cameron's By the Park in about an hour. We can 'wine and dine' and spy on the kiddies. You can be my consolation gift," Roy said with a wide grin. Dinah smacked Roy upside the head. "Oww. That hurt."
"Uh, did I miss anything," Barbara asked.
Roy turned around and saw her. His breath caught. Maybe doing all this to help Dick get together with Barbara was a bad idea. Maybe he should've just taken her on this date and let Dick learn to live with his stupidity. "You're ... stunning."
"Thanks," Barbara replied.
"Well, uh, I guess we'd better get going," Roy began. "We don't want to be late for our reservations."
***********************************************************************
"Your waiter will be with you in a moment," the maitre'd said as he walked away.
"Roy, this is a bit extravagant. Cameron's By the Park is THE most expensive restaurant in Gotham."
"Hey, babe. I'm known for giving a lady only the best." He winked at her then he stood up, "I gotta run to the little boy's room."
Barbara smiled at him, and then turned her gaze toward the large second story window she sat by. The window gave an uninterrupted view of Robinson Park. With the city lights in the distance, there was a soft orange glow illuminating the park. Roy was nice. Barbara wondered exactly how many of his bones Dinah had threatened to break to talk him into this dinner.
She was still looking out the window when she heard her dinner companion take his seat. With a smile, she turned to see Dick Grayson grinning back at her. He was in a black Armani tuxedo, one with the button collar rather than a bow tie. His coal black hair was perfect, except for that one lock that continued to fall onto his forehead. It still astounded her that he took her breath away. She stared at him for a moment and then asked, "What the hell are you doing here?"
"Nice to see you too," he replied as he handed her a note. "Roy asked me to give this to you."
"Roy? What did you do to my date?" she asked as she snatched the note from his hand. She unfolded the paper and read the words: "I'm known for giving a lady only the best -- for you that's Grayson." She smiled as she tucked the note in her purse.
"Well?"
"Well what?"
"Don't I get to see that?"
"No," she replied coyly. "So, you're the substitute?"
"Yep. You're stuck with me."
"I should leave, you know."
"Yeah, you should, but, I hope you won't. I'd like a chance to apologize to you."
Barbara sighed loudly, "Okay, I'm waiting."
Dick smiled at her. "I've been a jerk, an idiot, a moron, and a few other things Roy called me. He was absolutely right. I tried to push you out of something that had happened in my life. Something that hurt me. I was doing it because I was ashamed of what I did. Ashamed of myself. Do you remember the last time we went out -- right before all the craziness started -- you talked about why would it be wrong to -- you know. That it would be better for everyone, for the world. I talked and talked and talked about why it was wrong, and how we don't do this. Then I turn around and I," he looked down. It was hard to say, to admit, to himself and to her. The fact that she already knew it all didn't ease his shame. Leaning over the table and whispering to her, "I killed him."
"But Dick, he's not --"
"I know. But, it doesn't matter. I intended to kill him and I did. The fact that Bruce saved me by saving him doesn't matter, Bruce couldn't save my soul. I threw that away and I hated myself for it. You should've hated me to! But you didn't."
She smiled sadly at him. "I never would. I never could. You did something wrong. Okay. I agree with you. You're not perfect. I never thought you were. I've known you too long. I remember you almost married a certain alien princess. I KNOW you're not perfect." Barbara smiled at him and he smiled back at her. "I love you -- exactly as you are -- good, bad or indifferent. But, regardless of how you see yourself, you are good Dick. You're a hero. You're MY hero. You always have been. You know I didn't try to join your boys club to impress Bruce. It was a certain guy in short pants I wanted to impress."
"Oh, you impressed me," Dick said with a grin.
"I love you, but you hurt me when you shut me out. I thought we had gotten past the point in our relationship of shutting the other out."
"Barbara, I did too. And I want to be. And I'm stupid. And, as Alfred would say, I should be flogged." Barbara giggled as he said that. Dick continued, "Give me another chance. I'm stupid. But, I do love you."
She looked into his puppy dog eyes. She loved him from the first moment she saw him on the roof of police headquarters. Barbara hadn't known his name, but she had known his soul. They were forever tied from the instant their eyes first met. "How could I not forgive you, Dick? I love you. You're the most irritating man I've ever known. Doesn't that prove I love you?"
"So, you'll give me another chance?" he asked hopefully.
"I can't NOT give you another chance. And when you do something else stupid, which you will, I'll give you another chance then too." He smiled that dazzling smile of his. Who could think when they saw it? She saw the twinkling of mischief in his eyes. "What are you up to?"
"Oh, just thinking about our plans after dinner."
"And just what would those plans be."
"On the off chance that you'd forgive me and take me back, I took the liberty of renting the honeymoon suite at the Hotel Phillipe. I knew you wouldn't exactly let me sweep you off to Paris, but I can give you a little bit of Paris here in Gotham."
Barbara smiled. The Hotel Phillipe was famous in Gotham for exquisite rooms, French spas, and romantic atmosphere. "The honeymoon suite? Do you have illicit plans for me, Mister Grayson?"
His smile was wicked, "Oh yes ma'am. Roy even gave me a bag of toys," Dick winked at her as he said this.
Barbara brought her hand to her mouth in an effort to stifle a giggle. "I believe I'll have no honor left when you're done with me sir," she said in her best 'Southern Belle' accent.
"Nope. Not a bit. But, that's okay. I'll let you make an honest man out of me if you would," he said as he took a small box out of his jacket pocket and handed it across the table to her.
Barbara felt her chest tighten. This was NOT something she was expecting. Tentatively, she took the box from his hand and opened it. The diamond solitaire ring stared back at her. "Dick, I -- "
"Just say yes. We've played games enough. I love you. You -- just you. Just say yes. Please."
Barbara looked at him through tear filled eyes. "Yes."
***********************************************************************
"WOOHOO!" Dinah screamed in Roy's ear as they stood by a tree in Robinson park using the surveillance equipment they had taken from Barbara's apartment. Dinah threw her arms around him. "He asked her to marry him! Did you know he was going to ask her to marry him?"
Roy smiled a knowing smile. "Dudette, I'm Dr. Love. What do you think?"
Dinah smacked him upside his head again.
"Oww, that still hurts."
THE END
Author: Charlene Edwards
Rated: PG
Disclaimer: DC owns, DC does stupid things with them, so I'm addressing the stupid things DC caused in JLL.
Synopsis: Dick and Babs relationship is strained due to the events of JLL. So, Dr. Love makes a house call. This was written for the Hearts and Arrows Valentines Day contest. LOL -- believe it or not, it actually won. I hope you all enjoy. Charlene :-)
Dr. Love Makes A House Call:
"Titans Tower, we save the world for a price."
"Shut up Roy and listen to me," Dinah Lance's irritated voice came over the line.
"Well hey! What's up?"
"I need you to come to Gotham."
Roy stretched his eyes as he felt his mouth twist. "Gotham? Why?"
"You're friends with Nightwing, right?"
"Uh huh."
"You want to help him out?"
"Yeah, if he's in trouble."
"Well I'm personally going to kick his damn fine all over Bludhaven for hurting Oracle. So, IF you want to help your friend I suggest that you come to Gotham, don't tell him you're coming and help me with my plan."
Roy took his head out of his hand, he could feel a headache starting, "You have a plan?"
"Yes I have a plan. Now I expect you here to help. UNLESS you want to see me kick Nightwing's --"
"I"m on my way. Should Lian stay here or can she visit Grandma Dinah?"
"ROY! We have a crisis. Bring Lian next time."
***********************************************************************
Dick Grayson sat at the computer in his apartment researching an arms shipment that had been stolen. He knew Roland Desmond had a hand in it. He just didn't have any evidence to tie the theft to him. The research was going slower than he had hoped. Damn. If he could only call Barbara. But, he couldn't call Barbara. Things were -- what had he told Tim -- "strained". And Tim. Where the hell was Tim when he needed him? He was in chemistry class. What a wuss.
There was a loud knock at his door. He shook his head. No one ever used his doorbell. No, everyone had to try to knock his door down. Grumbling, he stood up and crossed the room, taking the five steps up to his door two at a time. "Yeah," Dick said as he opened the door.
"Dude, you look bad. What's up?" Roy asked as he let himself in the apartment. He noticed how disheveled Dick's hair was and the stubble on his face. Personally Roy liked stubble. However, it looked a lot better on him than on Dick, but then, he couldn't help it he was so hot.
"Roy? What're you doing here?"
"Dude, I gotta be in Gotham tonight. Dinah's fixing me up with this hot babe friend of hers."
"Really ... that's nice," Dick said absentmindedly as he shut the door and followed Roy back into the apartment. "So, you came to Gotham for a date and to Bludhaven to say hi."
"Yep. That's what I did. I couldn't be so close and not drop in on you. Share my good fortune."
"Good fortune?" Dick asked as he checked his computer search. Still searching. He turned around and saw Roy raiding his refrigerator.
"Yeah, man. The girl just broke up with her boyfriend cuz he's been acting like a jerk AND Dinah says this babe just rocks. OH and she's a redhead. Now that's good fortune," Roy replied as he opened a beer and started drinking. He moved over to Dick's too silent CD player and, finding the new Creed CD, he slipped it in and turned up the volume.
"Good for you Roy. Thanks for dropping by and sharing with me. But I don't want to keep you, so, if you're going to go, go. I've got things to do. A little computer research."
"I thought you and the Oracle were tight and she did all your research -- "
"Who said Oracle's a she?"
"You do the way you blush every time you talk to her and we've ALL caught you flirting with her over the Tower's computers. Hell, I've recorded some of it."
"Roy, just go on your date. Have a nice time," Dick said as he turned and started for his computer. He knew Roy could show himself out. He also knew he probably wouldn't.
"I'm going, but I don't have to be there for an hour. Gonna pour on the old Harper charm and Ms Gordon's gonna be eating outta my hand."
Dick spun around. "Gordon? Barbara Gordon?"
Roy grinned, "Yeah, you know her?"
"Do I know her? Yes, I know her AND Babs and her boyfriend haven't broken up!"
"Dude, according to Dinah - they're history!" Roy said as he plopped down on the sofa.
Dick's mouth opened indignantly but no sound came out. Then he stalked over in front of Roy, shaking his finger, "History? Where did she ... OH no they are not! Things may be a bit STRAINED but they are NOT history!"
"Dude, if she's a friend of yours maybe you haven't heard, but she and this jerk are history. OVER. Kaput. Seems that this idiot did something he can't get over. Barbara went over to see him and this idiot threw the girl outta his apartment. Soooo, according to Dinah -- and she knows what she's talking about -- they're history. History as in he is HISTORY!! I looooovvvve 'em when they're on the rebound. Man, the bum threw this girl out of his apartment... What an Idiot! Who'd be stupid enough to do -- "
"She is NOT on the rebound! I am NOT history!" Dick shouted. "You are NOT going AND I did NOT throw her out! She thinks I threw her out?"
"OOoooh, so you're the idiot! Sorry, man ... you snooze, you loose!"
"Yeah -- No -- I am not an idiot. Babs and I haven't broken up."
"WELLL, according to the bird, you guys are toast!"
"Roy, listen to me VERY carefully, you are NOT going out with Babs."
"Dude, you aren't the boss of me!" Roy said as Dick's ice blue eyes glared at him. "Well, okay, maybe you kind of are, but not right now! Not about this."
"No? Well I can very painfully break every bone in your body."
Roy smiled wickedly at Dick, "Yeah, but ya won't and ya know why?"
"Why?" Dick said pouting as he stomped across the room to his computer.
"'Cause that would make you a bigger ass than you already are. Dude, you threw your girlfriend out of your apartment. Did you learn nothin' from me?"
Dick turned around and glared at Roy as he opens his connection with Oracle. Her icon, rather than Barbara's face, appeared on his screen. "DON'T give me that icon -- show yourself. We gotta talk! BABS!"
"Oooh man, don't do that!" Roy said as he jumped up from the sofa and ran to the computer. "Ya hurt her, ya have to woo her back and not treat her like a dog to come when you call."
"Babs," Dick whined, "are you gonna talk to me?"
Roy closed the connection on the computer by pulling the plug from the wall. "Dude, she's gettin' read for her date - let it go."
Dick darted his eyes from Roy to the computer which was flashing Oracle's icon before the screen went blank. Dick felt his anger rising. In his best use of The Voice he growled, "You are NOT going out with her!"
"Woah! Simmer down the Bat temper tantrum, buddy ...We're buds right?"
"I thought we were," Dick replied petulantly.
Roy sighed. "For a smart guy, Rob, you can be so dim. Yes, we're buds ...You're personal cupid is here for you." Roy threw his arms wide and grinned at Dick.
"Personal ... Cupid? Oh God, I'm doomed."
"Roy's gonna take care of ever'thin'. I'm gonna help you and Dinah - it'll be Roytastic!"
Dick whimpered. "How did Dinah TALK Babs into this? A date with ... YOU?"
"Weeeell, you know Dinah, she's not real big on the permission part. She kind of just charged ahead."
"And you're going to help me exactly how?"
"The ABC's of Love - Dr. Love is in and I'm makin' a house call." Dick whimpered again as he made his way back to his sofa and fell, rather than sat, down on it. Undeterred, Roy continued. "First things first, loose both uniforms and go civies - chicks dig a man who is casual."
Dick was shaking his head, "Dr --- LOVE? Casual okay."
"Next forget anythin' Bruce ever told ya about women."
Dick rolled eyes at Roy. "Like he TALKS about women."
"You've got an expert here now and I know how to make even you look good! Now, where are her favorite places?"
"Places -- I can't ever get her outta that tower -- I dunno -- what types of places?"
Roy now rolled his eyes at Dick. "Dude, not those places. PLACES. You know behind the knees, the crook of the elbows, the soft curve of her delicious neck. Give me details!"
"WHY do I want to give you details if you're still planning on going out with my girl? I don't want to help you 'score' with Babs!"
Roy looked at Dick with a wolfish grin. "Well, I gotta get somethin' out of this!"
"NOT with MY girl you don't!" Dick yelled as he started to stand up.
Roy pushed him back on the sofa with a sigh. "Well, your possessive that must mean you care."
"Of course I care ... I ... I ... I MORE than care. I love her. Roy, this isn't some fly by night thing. I really love Babs."
"Man, you haven't shown it to her. She thinks you abandoned her. I'm thinkin' I'd dump you on your ass, if I was her."
Dick stared at his shoes as his chest tightened. Had he really blown it? Had he lost her? "I have shown her how I feel, I have. Man, right before all that STUFF with the Joker, I forced her out on a date, we drove up and watched the changing leaves. I even threw her cell phone away."
"Oh, that's a real good way to show her you care. What's that the When-You-Care-Enough-To-Destroy-Personal-Property phase?" Roy quipped.
Dick continued. "It's just -- well -- you KNOW what I did! Everyone knows what I did. And I just well ... I'm not good enough anymore ... for her."
"You're a hero, through and through. I wouldn't stand beside someone that I didn't think wasn't good enough --"
"No you'd just sleep with 'em," Dick flippantly replied.
"Oh I get it," Roy said all knowingly. "You took care of her. But, when she sees you hurtin' you turn all Bat on her and throw her away. Look, get this through your thick Bat skull. Dick, man, you did what you had to do ... It's over. No permanent damage to the scum bag. Stop doin' this to you and to her. Don't give up on yourself and don't just throw her away."
"I didn't throw her away. Contrary to Dinah's opinion, I did NOT kick her out of my apartment. I had to go to work."
"It's not Dinah's opinion that matters, it's Babs. And she knows that you could be late to work to talk to her."
Dick looked back at the floor. God he was messed up. He kept hurting people around him. He looked up at Roy with sad blue eyes. "Sorry ... I ... I'm sorry. I shouldn't have said that to you ..."
"Dude, look no worries. I completely understand a mouth running without engaging the brain. Happens to me ALL the time. Man, you need help. We all do sometimes. Some of us more than others ... let her help you. Hey, is the mouth overloading your you-know-what kinda what happened with Barbara?"
"Yeah. I guess my elevator comment kinda was uncalled for."
"Elevator comment?"
"She surprised me. Came over for a surprise visit. I kinda sorta told her not to make a habit of surprising me and not to make me sorry I put an elevator in this building," Dick said sheepishly.
Roy's took a serious tone, "Dude, man that was harsh. The old Dick wouldn't have said that and this new Dick definitely sucks."
Dick dropped his head in his hand. "I know, I know. I just don't know what to do. What'da I do?"
Roy kneels in front of Dick, taking his friends hands in his, "Dick, buddy, listen to me. You're the best of the best. But you have to understand that sometimes, you can't carry the world. Sometimes you have to let others who care help. Let her help you. I'm going to give you two pieces of advice. The first comes from me, your pal ...You go to her and talk to her and tell her she was right and listen to her. Do what she asks you to do. You apologize and beg for forgiveness."
"And what's the second piece of advice, oh sage for the lovelorn?"
"This is from DR. LOVE, you bring scented candles, oils and go to those places she likes and make her feel like you're the best thing that ever happened to her. Then you enjoy each other. Man, you deserve the best too." Roy smiled at his friend, then slapping Dick on the leg as he continued, "Then you write down all the details for the lovemiester, namely me, and share!"
"I ... I can do that. Except -- there's ONE problem. She's NOT speaking to me and she's going on a date with you. Well, I guess that's two problems."
"Nah, man - no problem. We're goin' to give her a night out with the guy of her dreams and then we'll sub you."
"Gee thanks! Where were you gonna take her or had you and Dinah planned that far ahead in this little scheme to bring me to my senses?"
"Dude, I never plan -- you just go with the flow. It'll be great."
"So -- uh -- what're we gonna do? Have me show up instead of you -- for the date? Does Babs EVEN know about this date?"
Roy scratches head. "Hmm ... you know the details were a little fuzzy there. That was the Bird's bit. I'm jus' supposed to show up if you don't come to your senses and stop being an idiot; a twerp; a dweeb; a moron -- "
"I GET your meaning! Thank you!"
"My pleasure." Roy flashed his wolfish grin again and rubbed his hands together. "Noooow, let's talk toys."
"TOYS?" Dick asked as he looked at Roy incredulously. "What toys?"
"Well, if you're going to make her happy you have to have toys ... adult toys -- "
"What! What're you --"
"Now Batboy who really needs help in the toy department, I'm gonna help you out with my little bag of LOVE ... it'll have all the incidentals in it." Dick smacked his forehead as Roy pulled his backpack off the sofa and started going through it. "Let's see here -- candles, oils, and candy - she like chocolate or somethin' like jellybeans -- I got an assortment."
Dick's eyes narrowed as he watched his friend. "Roy, how the hell did you come up with all this stuff on short notice? You were planning on trying to seduce Babs. That's what you were planning?"
Roy looked up at Dick sympathetically. "No man, I may not have been a bat scout, but I was a boy scout, I'm always prepared. I am DR. LOVE."
***********************************************************************
"Dinah!" Barbara growled as she watched Dinah Lance throwing her clothes from her closet onto her bed.
"You've got to have something decent in this closet."
"FOR?"
"For your date."
"What date?"
"The one I made for you," Dinah said as she turned around with a smile. "You barely have anything in here that could pass for romantic dress up clothes!"
Barbara looked at Dinah incredulously. Her mouth dropped open. "You. Did. What?"
"I made you a date. You've been holed up in this apartment sulking ever since pretty boy dumped you."
"He didn't dump -- "
"Whatever, whatever. Anyway. I know this nice guy, he needs someone nice, you need someone nice. So I set you two up."
Barbara sighed. "You didn't. You set me up on a blind date without letting me know. When is this so-called date? Call and cancel."
Dinah turned around with Barbara's long blue dress in hand. It was sleeveless with a ball gown skirt. "Can't. He's already on his way. We've got to hustle to get you ready. I think you should wear your hair up."
"I'm not going," Barbara said flatly.
"Yes you are. You can't say no. It'll break his heart. He came ALL the way from New York."
Barbara's eyes grew wide. "Roy! You set me up on a blind date with ROY HARPER! Dinah are you insane?"
Dinah pouted her lips at Barbara. "Come on. It'll be fun. He's really a good guy and he's had bad luck in the romance department. But he really is --"
"He's ROY! Oh Dinah," Barbara sighed. "And I have work to do. Oracle stuff you know."
"Please," Dinah said giving Barbara her best puppy dog eyes. "I'll handle the Oracle stuff."
Barbara stared at Dinah.
"Oh okay, so I can't turn on the computer thingies. I'll call Robin and HE'LL handle the Oracle stuff. He should like that. He can send Batman on wild goose chases all night."
Barbara giggled. "Oh alright. Dinner. I'll go with him to dinner. I guess I can go to dinner with Roy for that."
Dinah squealed with delight. "Oh I'm going to fix you up so pretty."
Barbara rolled her eyes and sighed. This was going to be a long night.
***********************************************************************
Dinah answered Barbara's door to see Roy standing there with flowers. Dinah pushed him into the hall, "What the hell are you DOING here? You were suppose to get junior mister grim and grumpy off his -- "
"He'll be at the restaurant. I'm just gonna whisk her there and we'll substitute her dates at that point and the best man'll lose. Everything's gonna work out as planned."
"It better!"
"Well, if it doesn't, it's not our fault. All we can do is bring 'em together. You know horses, water, can't make them drink."
"Grr. Get in there," Dinah said as she grabbed him by the arm and pulled him into the apartment. "Babs! Your date's here!"
"Yelling into the next room. That was subtle Dinah," Roy laughed as she punched him in the arm. "Hey, why don't'cha meet me at the Cameron's By the Park in about an hour. We can 'wine and dine' and spy on the kiddies. You can be my consolation gift," Roy said with a wide grin. Dinah smacked Roy upside the head. "Oww. That hurt."
"Uh, did I miss anything," Barbara asked.
Roy turned around and saw her. His breath caught. Maybe doing all this to help Dick get together with Barbara was a bad idea. Maybe he should've just taken her on this date and let Dick learn to live with his stupidity. "You're ... stunning."
"Thanks," Barbara replied.
"Well, uh, I guess we'd better get going," Roy began. "We don't want to be late for our reservations."
***********************************************************************
"Your waiter will be with you in a moment," the maitre'd said as he walked away.
"Roy, this is a bit extravagant. Cameron's By the Park is THE most expensive restaurant in Gotham."
"Hey, babe. I'm known for giving a lady only the best." He winked at her then he stood up, "I gotta run to the little boy's room."
Barbara smiled at him, and then turned her gaze toward the large second story window she sat by. The window gave an uninterrupted view of Robinson Park. With the city lights in the distance, there was a soft orange glow illuminating the park. Roy was nice. Barbara wondered exactly how many of his bones Dinah had threatened to break to talk him into this dinner.
She was still looking out the window when she heard her dinner companion take his seat. With a smile, she turned to see Dick Grayson grinning back at her. He was in a black Armani tuxedo, one with the button collar rather than a bow tie. His coal black hair was perfect, except for that one lock that continued to fall onto his forehead. It still astounded her that he took her breath away. She stared at him for a moment and then asked, "What the hell are you doing here?"
"Nice to see you too," he replied as he handed her a note. "Roy asked me to give this to you."
"Roy? What did you do to my date?" she asked as she snatched the note from his hand. She unfolded the paper and read the words: "I'm known for giving a lady only the best -- for you that's Grayson." She smiled as she tucked the note in her purse.
"Well?"
"Well what?"
"Don't I get to see that?"
"No," she replied coyly. "So, you're the substitute?"
"Yep. You're stuck with me."
"I should leave, you know."
"Yeah, you should, but, I hope you won't. I'd like a chance to apologize to you."
Barbara sighed loudly, "Okay, I'm waiting."
Dick smiled at her. "I've been a jerk, an idiot, a moron, and a few other things Roy called me. He was absolutely right. I tried to push you out of something that had happened in my life. Something that hurt me. I was doing it because I was ashamed of what I did. Ashamed of myself. Do you remember the last time we went out -- right before all the craziness started -- you talked about why would it be wrong to -- you know. That it would be better for everyone, for the world. I talked and talked and talked about why it was wrong, and how we don't do this. Then I turn around and I," he looked down. It was hard to say, to admit, to himself and to her. The fact that she already knew it all didn't ease his shame. Leaning over the table and whispering to her, "I killed him."
"But Dick, he's not --"
"I know. But, it doesn't matter. I intended to kill him and I did. The fact that Bruce saved me by saving him doesn't matter, Bruce couldn't save my soul. I threw that away and I hated myself for it. You should've hated me to! But you didn't."
She smiled sadly at him. "I never would. I never could. You did something wrong. Okay. I agree with you. You're not perfect. I never thought you were. I've known you too long. I remember you almost married a certain alien princess. I KNOW you're not perfect." Barbara smiled at him and he smiled back at her. "I love you -- exactly as you are -- good, bad or indifferent. But, regardless of how you see yourself, you are good Dick. You're a hero. You're MY hero. You always have been. You know I didn't try to join your boys club to impress Bruce. It was a certain guy in short pants I wanted to impress."
"Oh, you impressed me," Dick said with a grin.
"I love you, but you hurt me when you shut me out. I thought we had gotten past the point in our relationship of shutting the other out."
"Barbara, I did too. And I want to be. And I'm stupid. And, as Alfred would say, I should be flogged." Barbara giggled as he said that. Dick continued, "Give me another chance. I'm stupid. But, I do love you."
She looked into his puppy dog eyes. She loved him from the first moment she saw him on the roof of police headquarters. Barbara hadn't known his name, but she had known his soul. They were forever tied from the instant their eyes first met. "How could I not forgive you, Dick? I love you. You're the most irritating man I've ever known. Doesn't that prove I love you?"
"So, you'll give me another chance?" he asked hopefully.
"I can't NOT give you another chance. And when you do something else stupid, which you will, I'll give you another chance then too." He smiled that dazzling smile of his. Who could think when they saw it? She saw the twinkling of mischief in his eyes. "What are you up to?"
"Oh, just thinking about our plans after dinner."
"And just what would those plans be."
"On the off chance that you'd forgive me and take me back, I took the liberty of renting the honeymoon suite at the Hotel Phillipe. I knew you wouldn't exactly let me sweep you off to Paris, but I can give you a little bit of Paris here in Gotham."
Barbara smiled. The Hotel Phillipe was famous in Gotham for exquisite rooms, French spas, and romantic atmosphere. "The honeymoon suite? Do you have illicit plans for me, Mister Grayson?"
His smile was wicked, "Oh yes ma'am. Roy even gave me a bag of toys," Dick winked at her as he said this.
Barbara brought her hand to her mouth in an effort to stifle a giggle. "I believe I'll have no honor left when you're done with me sir," she said in her best 'Southern Belle' accent.
"Nope. Not a bit. But, that's okay. I'll let you make an honest man out of me if you would," he said as he took a small box out of his jacket pocket and handed it across the table to her.
Barbara felt her chest tighten. This was NOT something she was expecting. Tentatively, she took the box from his hand and opened it. The diamond solitaire ring stared back at her. "Dick, I -- "
"Just say yes. We've played games enough. I love you. You -- just you. Just say yes. Please."
Barbara looked at him through tear filled eyes. "Yes."
***********************************************************************
"WOOHOO!" Dinah screamed in Roy's ear as they stood by a tree in Robinson park using the surveillance equipment they had taken from Barbara's apartment. Dinah threw her arms around him. "He asked her to marry him! Did you know he was going to ask her to marry him?"
Roy smiled a knowing smile. "Dudette, I'm Dr. Love. What do you think?"
Dinah smacked him upside his head again.
"Oww, that still hurts."
THE END