DISCLAIMER: I do not own Azaka and Kamidake, nor any of the other characters of Tenchi Muyo mentioned within. They are property of AIC and Pioneer, but if you wish to go and stea--liberate them from their cruel masters, be my guest. Um, but I didn't tell you to.
* * * * *
A Log's Life
Part II
By Cyrus Marriner
Mihoshi had always been a phenomenally lucky person. Her birth had been lucky, as she was family of the Marshal of the Galaxy Police, which had helped her get out of situations many had been reprimanded for. She had an uncanny knack for stumbling upon clues and accidentally happening upon criminal hideouts. She had received a grand total of zero wounds in the field, an almost unprecedented number. She was no marksman, but when she hit things, it was almost always a vital shot, knocking out an engine or disabling a limb. And the universe be damned if her luck was suddenly going to give out on her now.
Three thousand years ago, in a nearby solar system, pirates had destroyed a merchant ship. In the ship's subsequent explosion, a fuel cell the ship had been carrying was propelled at incredible speeds towards the solar system. More specifically, towards the current point in space in the solar system the escape pod Mihoshi was in was located.
So, the fuel cell had traveled unmolested through thousands of hundreds of thousands of miles of space. And now its journey was going to end abruptly, bringing to a halt its unknown bid for the record of "Longest Distance Floating Through Space Without Being Sucked Into a Star".
There was a loud clunk as the fuel cell slammed into the side of the escape pod. Well, there would have been a loud clunk except for the fact that sound waves needed matter to travel through, and space has none.
The fuel cell, while being of impeccable quality, had been pretty badly damaged in the explosion. Specifically, there was an area where the casing had been almost completely worn through, to the point where a pencil lead could have punctured it. Naturally, the spinning fuel cell, when it impacted the escape pod, hit the one sharp, jutting corner of metal that had been missed in the last inspection of Yukinojo. It would have been smoothed over immediately, and classified as a "prevented safety hazard", netting the inspector another twelve Jurai he could have spent on alcohol. Which was the reason he missed the spot in the first place.
When the fuel cell impacted the stray corner of the escape pod, the worn portion of the casing was immediately penetrated. It was a small hole, but one through which the pressurized contents of the cell easily escaped.
This might not have been a problem, except for the fact that the cell was traveling through a stream of ionized particles left behind by Yukinojo's thrusters. The highly volatile fuel immediately reacted with the ionized particles from the engine wash, and the result was this:
An explosion.
Of course, whatever luck the universe had planned for Mihoshi would most likely be unnoticed by the two guardians. This is because Azaka and Kamidake were fighting. They couldn't maneuver themselves very well in the cramped conditions of the escape pod, but they could definitely hurl verbal taunts at each other. So they stood, slightly angled to provide room for Mihoshi, each one staring at the other with the lens that functioned as its sole "eye", their considerable masses no more than three inches away from each other.
"Dammit, Kamidake, we could have taken him!"
"But if Mihoshi had gotten hurt, then Sasami would be mad at us."
"We both know that Mihoshi wouldn't have been hurt."
"We couldn't be sure about that."
"I think we were sure enough."
"You would."
"What does that mean?"
"Oh, I'm sorry, Azaka. I guess you must have forgotten the incident on Calumni?"
"That was not my fault!"
"Oh, yes, your reckless risk-taking had nothing to do with it."
"Ah, yes, and I guess your extreme caution had nothing to do with the incident on Pelluci?"
"I hardly think that is relevant."
"Oh, and Calumni was?"
"Are you trying to start something?"
"I think we already have."
"When we get out of here, you are mine, Azaka."
"I dare you to do something, Kamidake."
"I'd like to see you say that when we get out of here."
The two guardians were about to come to blows as tensions past bubbled to the surface of this new conflict. And they very well might have if at that moment, the subtle chain of cause and effect set off by the fuel cell hadn't resulted in a massive explosion that engulfed the escape pod they were in.
"DAMMIT!" Jerome swore rather loudly, this time directing his anger at a rather annoying cable that had worked its way loose from the main mass of wiring and given him a rather unpleasant shock.
"Was it that same wire?" asked Yukinojo, who was hovering behind Jerome where he was working underneath the main console, continuing to unsuccessfully hotwire the ship's navigational systems so they would bypass the AI safety interlocks.
"Yes," muttered Jerome. "Dammit, is there a spanner around here somewhere?"
"It's over there," replied Yukinojo, who indicated a small panel off to the side of the ship by illuminating all of the lights around it.
"Thanks," said Jerome as he crawled over to the panel and opened it, rummaging through the tools inside. "You know, this would go a lot faster if you would just give me control of the ship."
"I believe I told you that the security interlocks prevent me from turning over authorization of the ship without the consent of the owner or a ranking GP officer."
"Yes, several times," muttered Jerome as he rooted through the contents of the side compartment. "Is that a teddy bear?" he asked when he felt something soft and furry.
"Yes," said Yukinojo.
"Is that an action figure?"
"Yes."
"Is it a Space Police Policeman Action Figure™?"
"Yes."
"With
Rocket Launcher Accessory™?"
"Yes."
"And Real Karate Chop Action™?"
"Yes."
"And Hyperspace Police Cycle™?"
"Yes."
"And a Citadel of Evil Playset™?"
"Yes."
Jerome paused for a second. "Cooooool."
"So, have you found the spanner yet?"
"Hold on...I'm going to put together the Citadel of Evil Playset™."
"A new dumbass airhead acquired," Yukinojo commented quietly to himself, quickly changing his opinion of the new captain.
"What?" asked Jerome.
"I said, 'All new. Some assembly required.'"
"Oh, okay," said Jerome.
Yukinojo sighed. It looked like this might be a long hijacking.
The escape pod flew away from where it had been engulfed by the explosion's brief flame. There was an ear-splitting screech as metal plates rubbed against each other, trying to escape from their seating. And then there was a final screeching sound as they did, opening a hole in the escape pod. And then there was the whistle as the small amount of air in the compartment escaped through that and many other holes. They widened as the quickly departing air demanded more room through which to escape its confinement. The pod began ripping itself apart as shifting metal ruptured fuel lines. These fuel lines were almost instantly ignited as the metal, still blazing hot from the explosion moments earlier, penetrated the lines' insulating material.
To one watching the vessel from space, it would have looked like there was a brief moment of calm. One would think the damage was done, figuring the escape pod was destined to float through space forever as a hunk of empty wreckage.
One would have been proven quite wrong moments later, when everything exploded, sending shards of metal flying at high velocity in random directions. There was a brilliant fireball which immediately flared out of existence as it consumed all of the oxygen it could in order to prolong its brief life. As the flame died down, all that was left was the two guardians and a glowing sphere inside of which was a prone Mihoshi.
"Well, that was sudden," said Azaka.
"Indeed it was," replied Kamidake. "We're going to need to get Mihoshi somewhere where she can get oxygen."
"Where? We only have limited ion propulsion. We can't get to a planet in time."
"I'm well aware of that. Can we contact--" Kamidake was cut off as he bumped into something. Something large. And metal.
"THE SHIP!" the two guardians exclaimed at once, realizing that although Jerome had left with Yukinojo, he had been forced to leave his own ship behind.
In the hasty escape Jerome had made with Yukinojo, he had either forgotten or neglected to destroy his ship. And now, his ship was conveniently going to provide Azaka, Kamidake, and Mihoshi with a ride.
It was a fairly simple matter reaching the main hatch; the docking tube had automatically retreated inside the ship when Yukinojo detached from it. However, there was now a new bit of trouble. There didn't seem to be any way to enter without inputting an access code. And Azaka and Kamidake, as well made as they were, were designed with defense in mind, so force wasn't an option.
"Umm...maybe he wrote it down somewhere?" ventured Kamidake.
"Where? On the side of the damn ship?!" Azaka yelled.
"Perhaps we can guess the code?"
"Yes. And even if we do, how would we input it? You recall how well that went with Yukinojo."
"Well, this isn't exactly Yukinojo. And, I think I might now how to do it now."
"The hell you can..."
Two arguments in one day. The guardians were on a roll.
Yukinojo sighed. The cockpit had been so clean when he had finished his daily tidying. And it hadn't even been messed up my Mihoshi at all! And now...now, if Yukinojo could, he would have cried.
Toys were everywhere. Panels were randomly torn out with wires splayed across them, action figures and plushies were all over the floor, and Jerome had somehow managed to get gum on the ceiling! There wasn't even any gum on the ship, particularly after Mihoshi had--well, Yukinojo couldn't remember because he had arranged for someone to delete the incident from his memory. But he was sure there wasn't any gum on the ship! And Jerome hadn't been chewing any when he came aboard the ship! So how the hell had the ceiling ended up with gum on it? How?
"Okay, um, I'm looking at a blue wire and a red wire here! Which one should I cross with this green one?" asked Jerome in his annoying voice. Yukinojo had found it somewhat pleasant at first, the slight accent providing a bit of change from the norm. Now it was annoying, a veritable parade of pain playing through his electronic ears.
"I don't know!" snapped Yukinojo.
"Okay, I'll just try them both!"
Yukinojo muttered, a habit he had developed while dealing with Mihoshi. It was a rare foible for an artificial intelligence to develop, and Yukinojo had it down to an art. Like twitching. He was also pretty good at that.
He had had a lot of time to perfect his twitch now that Jerome had gone from trying to bypass the security interlocks (at which he had done a commendable job) to directly wiring the engine to the main console. Of course, to do so, he had to rip the main command console out of its seating in the cockpit.
Yukinojo sighed again. Another thing he was good at that most artificial intelligences weren't. His "eyes" moved around the cockpit, surveying the damage. Again, he had the urge to cry. For several moments he considered trying to get tear ducts installed so he could. He quickly dismissed the idea, however. He was bordering on the edge of lunacy already, and that would surely have him decommissioned into something undesirable, maybe even a--he shuddered briefly--mechanical voice that says "Have a nice day."
Yukinojo thought about Jerome again and became annoyed. Why was he asking about different colored wires? I mean, sure he knew what the green wire did and what the red wire did and what the blue wire did, but why was Jerome asking? That's what the fricking manual was for! It should clearly say that the green wire should not be crossed with the blue wire...
"Oh dear," said Yukinojo.
"Kabloom!" said the explosion. A cloud of black smoke shot out of the engine room Jerome in which Jerome was working, staining the walls with soot. That would be a bitch to get cleaned. Maybe, if there was justice in the world, the explosion had ended this ill-fated hijacking.
"Don't worry, I'm okay!" hollered Jerome.
"Dammit," Yukinojo muttered.
"I think I might have broken something, and it's leaking some sort of caustic substance all over the--Oh, crap. Do you have some paper towels or something?"
At that moment, Yukinojo knew what he had to do. He made a vow to himself. He said it aloud, to make sure it sounded as good as it did in his mind. "I want to kill this moron."
"What?" asked Jerome from the engine room.
"I said, 'Is what you spilled the boron?'"
"No, I think it's some sort of hydrogen-based acid...maybe. OW! It doesn't feel good on the skin, I'll tell you that!"
Mutter.
"You're going to use your feet?" Azaka said in disbelief.
"Yes, I am. They have a much smaller surface area than anywhere else," the other guardian said as he maneuvered himself around in space so he could touch the keypad.
"Alright, I guess it's the best plan we have. Any ideas on the keycode?"
"Um...well, I'm hoping to get lucky."
"Okay, give it a shot."
Kamidake slowly rotated, using his contained ion drives to position himself perfectly on the keypad. Then he gave himself a little thrust...and crushed the keypad like aluminum.
"Oops. I may have given it a bit too much," Kamidake said.
"What happened?" asked Azaka, whose view was obscured by Mihoshi. He was generating a force field around her, the only thing preventing all of the oxygen from escaping into space.
"Um," Kamidake began, when he suddenly heard a distinct, female voice.
"What are you doing here?"
Analytical programs and sensors in Kamidake began working immediately to discover from where the new voice had come. It wasn't so much a voice as it was a short burst transmission of radio waves, which was what facilitated communication in space. Because, as everyone knows, sound waves need matter to travel through, which is why there is no sound in space. Kamidake's sensors quickly determined that the ship was talking to him, and that it was using a focused wave transmission, which meant Azaka could not hear any of this.
"I need a ride," Kamidake said back over the same frequency, immediately chastising himself for being so lame.
"Sorry babe, you don't have the access code," came back the voice.
"Please, we desperately need you. Otherwise the woman over there will run out of air and die!" Kamidake urgently transmitted.
"Hmmm...I'll do this for you, if you do something for me," returned the voice.
"Whatever it is, I'll do it."
"Love me."
Kamidake paused. He was, as were many other artificial intelligences, capable of feeling love. However, because the evolved need to pass on his genes wasn't present, AI's rarely felt a strong desire to love or be loved.
Kamidake looked at Mihoshi again. "Okay. I'll love you forever, if you let us into the ship."
"Forever?" the voice echoed, then laughed. "I only want a one-night stand kind of thing. We just interface, then we go our separate ways. I'm not looking for some sort of commitment, honey."
"Fine. Whatever you want. Just let us in."
"Alright, baby. I hope you're as good as you sound."
The connection closed, and then the hatch opened, giving them access to the airlock.
"Kamidake, I don't know what you did, but it worked!" Azaka congratulated.
"Neither do I," Kamidake muttered to himself. All he knew was that he suddenly felt very dirty.
Jerome had finally gotten everything connected and working. It had taken two more explosions and a brief mistake that had shorted out half of the ship and caused the coffee maker to start working overtime, making a nice batch of steaming hot carpet stain, but it was finally working. Also, there had been at least three paint spills while Jerome had been trying to cover up the marks he had made on the walls. Which had made it worse, because the paint he had found was at least three shades off. And there were scuffmarks on the floors everywhere, thanks to the boots Jerome wore.
"What are the coordinates for the Histur System, Yukinojo?" Jerome asked as he fiddled with some connections on the control panel.
"They're one point nine nine seven," Yukinojo paused. If he were to set the next coordinate just a little off, the ship would fly into a star. It would end the existence of this idiot. It would end his, as well, but that would mean he would never have to deal with Jerome or Mihoshi again.
Yukinojo quickly shed the thought. He wasn't that psychotic. Yet. After another paint spill, though...
"Hey, you trailed off after seven there!" Jerome called.
"Sorry," apologized Yukinojo. "Seven."
"No that's where you stopped."
"Yes, and then it's a seven."
"No, the seven comes after the nine."
"THE SEVEN IS AFTER THE SEVEN! THE NUMBER IS ONE POINT NINE NINE SEVEN SEVEN!" Yukinojo yelled, silently adding a "moron" at the end.
"Okay, I got it. No need to yell," Jerome said as cheerily as ever.
Yukinojo looked around the surrogate cockpit Jerome had set up in the engine room. He was sitting up against the wall with the console he had cannibalized from the normal cockpit in his lap. There were wires running from it to the engine, where it was directly hooked up to the main controls. This bypassed the security circuits, allowing him to pilot the ship as opposed to floating aimlessly in space.
And they had been aimlessly floating for a while. Jerome had done a good job at stymieing the initial security protocols, but while he had one many battles, he had lost the war. The engines had shut down, and now the ship was just floating.
But, after long last, the engines were flaring to life and directing them to the Histur System, and nothing could stop them. Although that didn't stop Yukinojo from trying.
There was a small toolbox, filled with lots of heavy painful tools, teetering over Jerome's head. It was perfectly aligned, too. So Yukinojo did something to rectify the problem. At least, the problem as he saw it. He made the thrusters on the port side fire quickly, jostling everything on the ship.
The toolbox fell towards Jerome's head. And he didn't see it coming.
"Wake up, Mihoshi. Wake up." This was the first thing Mihoshi heard as she returned to consciousness. It was Kamidake's voice, telling her to wake up. And she was graciously complying.
"What happened? Am I dead?"
It was a fairly valid concern. As near as Mihoshi's dazed mind could tell, she was floating in a black void. The artificial gravity was off, and she was still nearly blind still from the brilliant explosion of which she had been at the epicenter. So, as far as Mihoshi could tell, she was dead. And Kamidake's deep, rich voice was close enough for Mihoshi to assume it was God's. She wasn't in a moment of complete lucidity.
"No, you're not dead. This is Kamidake. Azaka and I are here with you."
"You and Azaka died? This is all my fault!" Mihoshi wailed.
"No, no," came Azaka's voice from her other side. "We just took you to a better place."
"You mean we've moved on? We're all dead?" Mihoshi began sniffling, on the verge of tears.
"Oops," said Azaka. "Bad choice of words there."
"Indeed," agreed Kamidake. "Look, we're right here with you, Mihoshi. Just open your eyes and look at the light."
"The light? I AM DEAD!" Mihoshi cried. "And you are too, and it's all my fault. If I had been faster or better or smarter we wouldn't be dead right now and you could go back to Ayeka and I could go back and have breakfast with Tenchi and we could--ACK!"
Mihoshi sputtered and opened her eyes as she was sprayed by water from an old fire prevention system the ship had turned on. "Just open your damn eyes, honey," said the ship's AI in its pleasantly feminine voice.
"Are you God?" asked Mihoshi.
"No, I'm Sakana. Now get up and figure out where the hell you are."
"I'm in hell?" Mihoshi asked. "Oh, what did I do wrong? I thought I was a good person! I tried to help people! I know that sometimes they ended up crying and threatening to kill me, but I wanted to help!"
"You are
NOT in hell," Sakana said firmly. "You
are not dead. You are in a space ship."
"Oh," said Mihoshi. "Well, why is God talking to me?"
"KAMIDAKE IS NOT GOD!" Sakana exclaimed. "Although, now that I think about it, I hope he can work miracles in the sack..."
"What?" said both Azaka and Mihoshi.
"Oh, nothing. Don't you two worry about it," Sakana said.
"What happened to the escape pod?" Mihoshi asked.
"It exploded," explained Azaka.
"You were there, remember? In the center?" said Kamidake.
"A bright flash?" Azaka elaborated. "Loud boom?"
"I fear the girl may have had some brain trauma," Sakana said.
Azaka and Kamidake looked at each other, then began chuckling.
"That's okay," said Azaka, "you just don't know Mihoshi."
"OW! OW OW! DAMMIT OW! SHARP! OW! HEAVY OW OW OW!"
"Not even unconscious," Yukinojo muttered, as Jerome flailed and ducked underneath the barrage of heavy, oftentimes sharp, tools. Yukinojo watched the spectacle unfold, and began to regret the wisdom of his actions. He would have to clean up this mess, after all.
"Whew," said Jerome, standing up and brushing himself off, "that was close."
"Yes, it certainly was. We must have hit some sort of object," Yukinojo lied.
"I knew there was an asteroid belt near our location, but I was unaware that we were so close already."
"I believe it was just a random piece of debris. If you come to the actual bridge, I can show you our current progress." Yukinojo turned around and left the engine room, adding, "...if you didn't rip out that cord already," on his way out.
Jerome moved forward, or at least tried to. Then a strange look passed Jerome's face and his eyes turned downwards, to his feet. He grunted audibly once, then reached down and grabbed his right leg, and began pulling. When that leg refused to budge, he tried the other, somehow managing even less success.
"How did this happen?" he asked himself, scratching his head. Jerome leaned back and sat, figuring he would be able to ponder this sudden occurrence just as well seated as standing. And he immediately leapt up when something sharp and stabbing poked him in the rear.
At least, he tried to leap. It ended up being more of him throwing himself forward, rotating about the axis generated by his stuck feet. He landed face first on the deck with a thud.
"Ow," he said, propping himself up on his elbows. His right hand instinctively went to his buttocks, looking for the sharp stabbing thing on which he had sat. Finding it, he grimaced for a moment and pulled it out, then brought it in front of him. It was a piece of glass. And it had part of a label on it, too. Jerome read aloud:
"Industrial Strength Adhesive. Warning: Do not let come in contact with skin or eyes. If skin or eye contact occurs, dissolve with a solution of one half--" Jerome looked at the piece. "One half what? And what's the other half?" he asked frantically.
Quickly, Jerome pulled himself up into a crouching position and began looking around for the rest of the label. After sifting through several pieces of glass and getting quite a few cuts on his hands, Jerome still had no more answers. And his ankles were starting to hurt.
Resigned, Jerome reached over to the command console he had set up so he could work on plotting the ship's course, or something equally unnecessary and menial. As luck would have it, the impact had jarred the console just out of reach.
"I really wish I hadn't taken off my shoes." Jerome said forlornly, casting a downward glance at his poor stuck feet.
"Alright, that problem's solved," Azaka said with relief.
The last ten minutes had been spent convincing Mihoshi that she was not dead, and that Yukinojo had been hijacked. The second had been much easier than the first, but Mihoshi was even worse than usual. The blow on the head had dizzied her to the point of mild retardation.
"So, where is Yukinojo?" Mihoshi asked. Azaka was strongly reconsidering his earlier statement about Mihoshi just being Mihoshi.
"Yukinojo was hijacked," Kamidake explained. Again.
"What? When did this happen? We've got to find him!" Mihoshi exclaimed.
"Can I hit her?" Azaka asked, advancing from the back of the terribly cramped ship.
"No," Kamidake said, cutting off his approach. "We've just got to help her regain her memory, because cheap tricks like bonking people on the head to fix their brains only work in--"
Kamidake was interrupted by a loud, metallic "KAWANG". This noise had come about thanks to the ship's computer, which had tired of this and figured she'd either fix Mihoshi's brain of knock her out, either of which would be an acceptable result to her.
"--cartoons."
"We need to find Yukinojo!" Mihoshi exclaimed.
"If you had a foot, it would be in your mouth," Azaka said smugly.
"I don't have a mouth, either," Kamidake muttered. He turned to Mihoshi. "How can we find Yukinojo?"
"Well, I have my control cube," she said, reaching up to her hat to pull of a fluffy white ball that immediately took the form of a pink cube. She began twisting the faces, like it was a pink lemonade Jell-o Rubik's cube. The first twist changed her outfit into orange and purple combat armor. The next twist caused her pistol to appear out of subspace and land on top of Azaka. The next twist changed her clothes back to her normal GP uniform. The next twist caused a beam of light to emanate from the cube, like a flashlight. Except instead of being aimed in front of Mihoshi, it was aimed at her face.
"Ack!" she exclaimed as she flipped over the back of the pilot's seat in an attempt to escape the sudden bright light. She looked around sheepishly for a moment, then apologized.
"Sorry." Once she was reseated, she twisted it another time, and finally got the desired result. A soft, feminine voice came out of the cube.
"Thank you for accessing the GP handbook. How may I assist you?" it asked.
"Yes, could you tell me how to work the GP issue watch, model--" she paused to look at the numbers inscribed on it, "--10B Series?"
"What is the desired function you wish to operate?"
"That was a little redundant, wasn't it?" Kamidake whispered to Azaka.
"Shut up," the voice politely said.
"Excuse me?" Kamidake asked.
"Can you explain the tracking systems? Specifically for tracking a stolen Galaxy Police Cruiser?" Mihoshi asked before the help file could get in an argument with Kamidake.
"Simply press the mode settings button until you are in 'distress tracking mode'. Then your cruiser should be clearly displayed and labeled in the holographic display."
"Thanks!"
"Do you have any other queries?" the help file asked.
"I do," Azaka interjected. "Just where the hell do you get off telling my friend to shut up?"
"Do you want a piece of this, fatass?" the help file asked, retaining its pleasant tone.
"Who do you think you're calling fatass, you ignorant little help file? I'd rather have a poorly translated instruction manual, myself," Azaka said smugly to Kamidake.
"Perhaps you should remove the stick from your ass before you start to take its shape. Oh, wait, too late!" the help file retorted.
"What did you just say?" Azaka shot back, his voice on the verge of yelling.
"I said you can take your crappy log-shaped BEEOOOOP." The strange sound at the end was caused by Mihoshi twisting her control cube to deactivate the program.
"Alright," she said to herself, ignoring the steamed guardians and concentrating on the watch, "I need to change it to distress tracking mode."
Mihoshi pressed a button on the side of the watch a few times, then pressed a button on the face. Three wide, concentric circles of varying colors popped up above it. After a moment, they all rotated and tilted, displaying various red dots with characters near them.
"Sakana, lay in a heading of one point nine nine two seven. That's where Yukinojo is."
"Aye-aye, captain," Sakana said with a touch of sarcasm in her voice. Engines flared and soon the humble crew was on their way to rescue Yukinojo.
Yukinojo was, at the moment, in very little need of rescuing. In fact, he was listening to the Dies Irae passage of Guiseppe Verdi's Requiem, effectively drowning out the pathetic pleas Jerome was making from the engine room. It was another curiously humanlike trait he had developed. Listening to music, not ignoring the cries of those in need. Besides, the fool was just stuck to the floor by some adhesive. Yukinojo could bring him some solvent once they reached the planet.
Right now, the AI was enjoying the peace the powerful choral piece brought him. If he had arms, they would be making wild gestures like those of a conductor. But spastic and reminiscent of a drug-induced seizure. Yukinojo had no artificial appendage control built into his intelligence, so he would be effectively unable to control them properly.
However, he could control his body, a pink set of domes attached to tracks on the ceiling through a series of hinged arms. And Yukinojo was controlling his body, pirouetting about the bridge to the music. He had been doing so since the beginning, starting with the first long choral note, through which he did a tight spin while moving up and down in a corresponding pattern with the brass notes playing in the background.
With each powerful brass note, Yukinojo burst forward and like a striking snake and just as quickly retracted with each following beat of the bass drum. For the next long choral note, he moved from one end of the track to which he was connected to the other, once again moving up and down in correspondence with the background notes.
For the next series of notes, Yukinojo held his position through the brief initial note, then jerked up on his middle hinge to each burst of sound and returned to his original position on the bass drum note.
He quickly pulled himself as close as possible to the ceiling, and slowly lowered himself with the choral note, slowly speeding his descent with the steps of the mounting crescendo. When he was fully extended, he began rotating and sliding along the track to the series of four brief choral notes, the first of which was always accented by the full voices of the choir singing it.
And at the end of the track, he came face to face with Jerome.
"GAH!" he exclaimed, inches from Jerome's face. He quickly regained his composure. "What took you so long?"
"I glued my feet to the floor," Jerome answered briskly.
"What?" Yukinojo said, doing an excellent acting job. "Wait, nevermind. Just, how did you unglue yourself?"
"I didn't. Laser cutter." Jerome pointed to his feet for emphasis. And sure enough, attached to his feet were two large, fairly circular pieces of the floor.
If Yukinojo had a heart, he would have had a heart attack. But he didn't, so he just managed for a few moments of astounded silence while staring that Jerome's new shoes. "I think," he paused for a second. "I think I have some solvent that could work on that."
"Cool!" Jerome said. "How much longer until we reach our destination?" He walked over to the command chair, his feet making annoying clomp sounds with every step.
"I hate my life," Yukinojo said sadly.
"What?"
"I said 'We're late. By nine.'"
"Nine?" Jerome said, obviously confused.
"Oh, right, you don't use Greenwich Mean Time. About one hour," Yukinojo replied. "New let me see if I can't find that solvent."
As he left the bridge, Yukinojo muttered to himself, "I'm going to find the one that burns, too."
Mihoshi's motionless form floated through the weightless cabin of the Sakana, asleep. The ship was using its FTL drives in their search of Yukinojo, but it was still taking long enough for Mihoshi to take a nap. Azaka and Kamidake had gone into a low-power mode. Not to conserve energy, as their fusion reactors would last for a few more decades, but because there was little for them to do and it allowed them to conserve power in case of an emergency.
They were all floating because Sakana was low on fuel, and could only make it if certain functions were deactivate. So, after a bit of deliberation, artificial gravity, shields, and the stereo system were deactivated. In that order.
And thus, the inhabitants of the small one-man vessel were floating around, bumping into each other on a regular basis. The only results of the collisions were a slight mutter and a brief movemont of arms, part of a comical attempt to roll over while half asleep in zero g.
And so, it caused quite a stir when Sakana decided to wake the sleeping trio up by temporarily switching on artificial gravity.
"OW!" came three startled voices, accompanying the thuds of their accompanying bodies hitting the deck.
Azaka was the first one back on his feet. Well, at least what counted as his feet. "What was that for?" he asked.
"I needed to wake you up." If she could have, Sakana would have shrugged along with the comment. "We've arrived."
Mihoshi was first to the window. "That's where Yukinojo is?"
Azaka was second. "Huh. The planet looks familiar somehow."
Kamidake was third. "I concur."
The comm. crackled with a burst of static, then sound greeted their ears. "Welcome to Pelluci, please state your business."
Both Azaka and Kamidake made a slight gagging noise, and if they could have, they would have blanched. "Is something wrong?" Sakana asked.
"The planet Pelluci is, thusfar, the only planet to have refused allegiance with the Juraian Empire," Kamidake said.
"In no small part to our friend Kamidake here," Azaka added.
"Quiet," Kamidake snapped at Azaka. "Anyway, as such, it is a haven for smugglers, bounty hunters, and wanted criminals."
"What's your point?" Sakana asked.
"My point is, that there are any number of people here who would gladly take the opportunity to kill a Galaxy Police officer or any sign of the Juraian Empire."
"What would they do to a Galaxy Police cruiser?" Mihoshi asked.
"I don't want to know," Kamidake responded.
"I really don't want to know."
* * * * *
Thanks to Geoduck for ID'ing the passage of Verdi's Requiem I was referring to in that one scene. It's a great piece, and I recommend it for download wholeheartedly. And additional music thanks to SC for helping me with the terminology. Anything I got wrong is one hundred percent my fault, though. SC knows her music. Major thanks to Hospitaller and Evil Asian Genius for their proofreading efforts. Two of the best, they are.