Rating: R
A/N: Okay, this is a little something I've been meaning to address for a while now. (I just haven't gotten my lazy butt around to it… ^_^) Some people have noticed that a great deal of characters have been insulted in this fic in one way or another. I know this is gonna sound kinda evil, but the insults are purely intentional. This is from Kakarott's point of view, and let's face it, he doesn't discriminate, he hates everybody. That's the way I interpret him, and I'm trying to make this as realistic as possible, so it's not gonna change. *sighs* Alright, I'm done ranting now… Thanks to everybody who has reviewed so far. I love hearing what ya have to say.
Summary: The Cell Games are fast approaching, and Kakarott is disgusted with the way Son Goku is taking things. Will Kakarott have the patience to wait with the annoyances of Goku's everyday life tormenting him?
This is degrading… The idiot is simply sitting around and doing absolutely nothing when he should be preparing for the Cell Games. The stupidity of this fool is blinding… The little chat that the simpleton had with that talking furball of a cat revealed that Cell could most definitely be a threat to him, but he insists on staying on his ass in these vital days that could be used for training.
Sometimes I wonder how in the hell that this moron could have split from my personality and taken over my body. His naiveté shows that his thinking capacity is not impressive in the least, but his will is very strong. That is the only thing that is keeping me from taking back what is rightfully mine.
It really is becoming annoying to have to sit back and choke down all the affection that has been flying about between my counterpart and the hellcat. They've been getting intimate lately, and that's almost more than I can stand. That woman doesn't deserve to touch my body…
All Son Goku has been doing for the past several days is fish, spend time with his friends, and screw his mate. If this doesn't stop soon, I am going to end up revealing myself to the idiot by trying to take back my body, and I know that I am not capable of successfully breaking the simpleton's will. If I try now, all that will happen will be that the fool will know that I am here. Then he'll find a way to get rid of me, and I cannot allow that to happen. His ignorance is my best weapon right now, and I will use it to the fullest…
Fortunately, the Cell Games are only a few days away. I know that I have enough patience for this wait. I have waited far longer than this for a battle, and this wait will be nothing compared to those that I have weathered before. I can last…
* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *
So this is it. This is the day. The moron's greatest challenge is to be faced today. Vegeta is nowhere in sight as the simpleton and his friends streak in the direction of the tournament, but I know the stubborn prince will show up. He won't turn down the chance of battle.
The anticipation is very strong as Cell's ring becomes visible in the distance. This fight will truly test the capabilities of my body. No other battle has been quite as vital to win as this one.
As the baka and his friends reach the ring, I see that Vegeta is already there, a scowl on his face and his arms crossed in front of his chest. It is a subtle scent, but I can smell the aroma of his strictly controlled excitement. He is looking forward to the oncoming battle just as much as I. He simply refuses to show it, though.
A quick look around the area produces the newly repaired android, a human reporter, cameraman, and an odd-looking one with a ridiculous haircut. Sometimes I wonder about the sanity of this species… Not only are they idiots, but they come up with the most inane ways of 'styling' their hair. More like mutilating it…
The android approaches the moron and his friends, thanking the bald monk for his assistance in his repairs. The dimwit offers the machine his hand in a gesture of greeting, but the android refuses the handshake. It unnerves the idiot to no end.
The fool volunteers to go first. Vegeta appears to have no objection to it, and it is only fitting that my body should be tested first in the cataclysmic battle to come. However, the human with the ludicrous hair seems to think that he should fight with the lab freak first. The weakling tries to prove his 'strength' by pulling a rock from the earth and smashing it.
Stupid human… Let Cell kill the tiresome creature…The dolt tries to warn the human of his foolish decision, but the weakling pays him no heed. In the end, Son Goku allows it to continue due to the fact that the human can be revived when the dragonballs are next used.
Just as the human is about to initiate his 'fight' and get his sorry ass killed, a plane in a disgusting color of pink flies in. Two humans that look as if they just stepped out of the freak circus jump from the plane accompanied by a red haired woman.
Will this display of idiocy EVER end?!
The human in the white suit takes the place of the stupid weakling. He seems to think he has a chance… This slaughter will be pathetic…
He launches himself into the air in hopes of performing some sort of absurd technique, but a flicker of Cell's ki sends the human flying out of the ring to dig a hole in the ground.
It's a shame he didn't kill the human… Then again, he's going to need all the ki he can get when I step into the ring…
The fool eyes Cell with a vengeance. He's not at all pleased with the android, but I can feel the relief at the fact that the genetic creation did not kill the weak human.
Cell returns the glare as the other of the human pair enters the ring. He is just as anxious to get the real tournament started as myself.
The overweight human charges Cell, but with another flicker of his ki, the human is stopped in his tracks and unceremoniously thrown out of the ring, screaming his defeat as he hits the ground.
Humans are so damn weak…The human with the afro must have finally seen enough because he steps into the ring and removes his cape and belt.
Maybe the freak will kill him and rid this planet of his stupidity.
The weakling reaches into his shirt, pulls out a capsule, and activates it, producing a small duffel bag. He removes fifteen tiles from the bag and stacks them high. It seems he is not done with his little show.
If this doesn't end soon, I am going to loose my fucking sanity!The human breaks fourteen of the tiles, and the human reporter is overexcited by the sight of it. The weakling raises his arms high and shouts his 'victory' to the camera.
His ignorance is painful…The human launches himself at Cell and lands a kick to the freak's face that does absolutely nothing. His stupidity is so great that he does not realize this until Cell backhands him into the side of a cliff.
The android is ready to start the true battle, and the simpleton's anxiousness is high as he steps into the ring.
Let the bloodshed commence…