"Look over there in that slump. It looks like something struggle or fought there," said Armando.
"Or someone," pointed out Jasmine, signaling to a little red strip trapped on one of the branches.
"Looks like your little girl gave Carmen a bad day," Ivy looked at Zahyra and Miguel.
"Come on, we must find a way to cross this slump. It looks very sticky and slippery to just walk trough it," Charlie said.
"I like the way you are starting to think, Charlie old buddy," Zack nudged him.
"They must be just up ahead," Tatyanna said.
Ivy looked around for something that could be used as a stepstone, but there was none. Her mind raced trying to find a way across. 'How was Carmen able to cross to the other side without touching any of the slump between them and the struggling site.' She looked to her left, to her right, to the trees, to the ground, to…, 'Wait a minute, the trees. Of course, the trees, she grabbed a branch and swung to the other side. Now that was cleaver.'
"Sorry guys no way to go around it in ether way," Josha said.
"This is all marsh land that is surrounding us," said Lee.
"Don't worry guys, I already found a way to cross it," Ivy stepped back and ran toward the slump. She jumped at the very origin of it and grabbed a branch. She somersaulted across it landing safely on the other side.
"Wow, way to go Ivy," everyone cheered.
"Nah, it was nothing, no go on try it."
Everyone looked back at each other and tried to decide who went first. Zack was pushed to go, of course, against his will.
"Ooohhh man, I was at the dentist the day they taught this at the academy." He stepped back just as Ivy had done and ran towards the slump. He jumped, grabbed ahold of one of the branches, somersaulted to the other side, 'Hey, this is easy,' and SPLASH!, need I say more.
The forest was consumed by laughter. This was a site to remember. The funniest thing any of them had ever seen. Meanwhile Zack was struggling to get out, he stood up and fell down just what happened to Lina moments later. This was so hilarious, he was now all covered in mud with no possible way to get out.
"Don't worry Zack, Ha, Ha, Ha, we'll help, Ha, Ha, you get out," Tatyanna jumped and somersaulted by the branch, but she was laughing so much she didn't knew what she was in for. SPLASH!.
(Ohh man, not even the Simpsons could have produced this much laughter.) Tatyanna now knew what it felt to be slimed.
"Yuck, this is so disgusting," she cried.
"You see, don't laugh at the misery of the others, or it could happen to you too," Zack advised her.
"Here guys, let me show you how it is done," saying that Armando jumped and grabbed the branch, as he was twirling on it, it snapped and he fell to the slump behind Tatyanna. (What a comedy series.)
"Youngsters, step aside let me try that," Miguel prepared himself. He jumped…
"Be careful dear, you haven't trained in a" SPLASH! "long time," Zahyra yelled at him. He didn't even reached the branches. He just landed and slipped toward Armando. He stopped before the collision and looked up. He looked around, and… started to laugh his belly off.
"I'm coming dear, aaahhh." SPLASH! She didn't cough the branch as well.
"I'm coming Mrs. Díaz, oops." SPLASH! Josha tripped over a loose root and fell on the slump. Wow, what a messy group these people are.
"You guys are no match for me, look at this," Jasmine jumped and caught a branch, all was well and dandy, but the branch she caught had moss and it slipped from her grip. SPLASH!
"You were right Jas, there is no way I could match that fall, Ha, Ha, Haaa. Don't worry I've done this thousands of times." SPLASH! Lee fell on his face.
"You must really be a loser, always falling down," Jasmine joked him.
"Hey, Charlie, now is your turn. Come on don't disappoint me, ACME is counting on you," Ivy called to him.
Charlie though a moment, (this is unusual for him), but he remembered a trick Lina had used on one of their previous encounters that saved her from jail and he decided to give it a try.
"Pardon me for what I'm gonna do, but it is for the best." He stepped on Josha, then jumped over to his father, then to Armando, then to Lee, then onto Zack, and he landed safely on the other side were Ivy was. Ivy clapped at him, he really had impressed her. That was a smart move, she was sure he one day would be a great detective.
"That was great. Very clever of you, don't you think guys."
"We were reduced to be used as stepstones," Zack mumbled.
"This is so embarrassing," Lee said.
"That was so cool," Tatyanna said with stars in her eyes.
"I'm sorry but are you guys alright?" asked Charlie to the not so enthusiastic men.
"Don't worry, we will use you head as a springball later," said Armando.
"Stop squabbling and help us get out of here," Miguel complained.
"Alright already," Ivy looked around for a vain or something to throw at them and pull them out.
"Hey, Ivy I found something over here," called Charlie with a very thick vain on his hands.
"That is perfect come on." Ivy threw the vain to Zack and Tatyanna. Ivy was at the end and Charlie was pulling in front of her.
The mud was so thick and slippery Zack had problems getting up. He finally did it and started to walk. Unfortunately (ohh, I'm so bad) he slipped, and it was such big slip that he dragged Charlie with him and almost Ivy. SPLASH!
"Yeah, good job Zack," the men cheered.
"Sorry Charlie, I didn't do it on purpose, really," Zack apologized.
"Don't worry, be happy."
"Great now I'll have to pull one of you at the time, and…," Ivy felt something creeping over her hand. When she looked back it was a green python. Ivy concentrated on her moves, somehow she had to get her hands of the vain without discomforting the snake. The python twitched and attacked. Ivy let go the vain and jumped backward with lightning speed. SPLASH! (Hurray, joy to the world, this is so colorful, I think I'm going to go paint a lovely picture and sent it to my best friend…. Or maybe not.)
"Hello Ivy, long time no see you. How have you been?" asked Zack.
"Aaarrrrggggg… this is great. How are we going to get out of here?"
SCENE 2
"I'm sure I heard people laughing, honest," Moe was ahead of the group looking through the forest.
"Yeah, the people in your head were laughing at you," Lars mocked him.
"Hearing people in your head is so wrong, that is bad karma," Hannah said.
"Why are we following this two idiots Carmen?" asked Hugo in a low voice.
"Because is the only lead we have now. None of the plane's radios work, and I don't think there are any Radio Shacks available around here."
A rustle came from the bushes and from it emerged Paige. She was so hysterical she could have looked like Morticia Addams.
"Oh my God, oh my Lord. This is not good. Ooohhh, lets get out of here," she ran hysterically past Hugo.
"Stop her," Carmen commanded. Hugo got her by the collar, but she continued to run with her feet in the air.
"Oh, wow. I'm running but I am not able to go any further."
"For Pete's sake, Paige, you are the biggest airhead I have ever met." Carmen told her.
"Oh, really, thank you Carmen. I'm so proud of it you know, I've worked so hard on it for years."
"So I see."
COMMERCIAL BREAK
There has been an outburst of Airheadness disease. Many people have been reported with this syndrome, specially today's young female pop artists. This disease is very contagious, so precautions must be made. You could acquire it by a friend, neighbor, school's fachionmaster appointed girl, even by phone or the internet.
The symptoms that this disease causes are:
A joyful, ear piercing, giggly laugh.
The use of phrases such as = So, OK, so he/she said that; Oh my God, oh my God, I can't believe he/she said that = and such and such.
The uncontrollable urge to collect every issue ever printed of Seventeen, Teen and Pop Stars.
If you have or present any of this symptoms or all of them, you may have acquired the Airheadness disease. There is only one existing cure for it and this is the following:
First go to Pearl Vision or Lens Crafters (or where ever you prefer) and ask them to give to you the most horrible and potent eyeglasses they posses.
Rent Blue Lagoon form Blockbuster, and watch it ten times in a weekend.
On Sunday afternoon, try to reflect and answer this questions:
What could have been the reaction of the girl when she first got the menstruation?
How where they able to know how to have sex?
Once they finally get to the city, what subject will interest the most to the girl, the boy and their child?
WARNING: This method hasn't been clinically approved, consult a doctor to find out if you can go through with it.
COMMERCIAL ENDS
"Now that wasn't necessary, why don't you prevent this Carmen?" Lina asked her.
"This may be a fanfiction about me, but I have no relation with the writer. So just keep up with the show and don't look at her, OK?"
SCENE 3
"Paige, what was behind those bushes," Hugo asked her.
"The ACME detectives. Practically the whole agency might be there. They are hundreds, thousands."
They all stuck together when they heard the shocking news. In what cruel joke they had landed. Carmen couldn't believe that this was true. She got out of the entangled group and went to check it out.
A minute or two passed and they heard a small laugh from that way. 'ACME got Carmen and they are celebrating,' they thought. A bigger riot was heard along with some curses and shouts.
"They got the boss," Lars hugged Moe.
"What should we do now," Moe hugged Lars back.
Lina separated from the hugged group and walked to where Carmen had disappeared. Sometime passed and the laughter augmented, also the curses.
"Oh my God, they got Lina too," Paige fainted.
"Those savages, they shouldn't be even called humans," Hugo covered his eyes.
"Lucky rabbits foot please protect us,' Hannah prayed.
The laughter continued until Carmen called them over to see what was ACME made off. They appeared near the slum and caught a glimpse of what Carmen meant. They couldn't believe it. ACME's gumshoes, or to say it correctly, ACME's mudshoes.
"HA, HA, HA, ha, ha, ha," they all broke in laugh.
The ACME detectives stared at them with angry eyes. 'They are laughing, laughing at us.' This was the most embarrassing moment in ACME's history. This was not good. ACME is supposed to create fear on VILE, the only thing they had created was a bunch of lunatic thieves.
"Looks to me one of you ran down on an old friend of ours," Carmen said pointing at the green python. " That little rascal put us in the same problem." They laughed again.
"Well, I'm not giving up on you. You are arrested for… Aaaaahhh," Ivy stood up but slipped.
"I'll get you sis, but …" SPLUT! Ivy fell on Zack, Zack slashed mud up at the sky. When Ivy looked at him some of the mud fell on his head. It was funny, it was hilarious. It was… was… "HA, HA, HA, ha, ha!" Ivy exploded in laughter. If you can't fight them, join them. Everyone roared in laughter. (Wow, this is funnier than Scary Movie.)
"Come on, lets get them out of there," Lars said. "To let my belly rest form so many laughs."
It could well have been over half an hour later when they got the last of them out.
"Now to get onto business," said Armando.
"Yeah, exactly," Lee backed him.
"You are under arrest," Ivy said pulling out some handcuffs.
Sara, Paige, Lars, Moe, Hannah, Hugo, Lina and Carmen looked at her with an expression of: is she for real.
"Yeah, and you are going to send us to Hollow cave prison located on the next mountain," Lars mocked her.
"He is right, Ivy," Miguel took the handcuffs from her. "There is nothing we can do."
"What are you saying," Tatyanna was shocked. "They are thieves, they are criminals."
"We are the law, we are…" Jasmine was cut off.
"…lost in the woods." Zahyra terminated the sentence. "We are stranded on an island, with no way to get out. No French fries, no hot water, no newspapers," she was getting hysterical by now "no sanitary bathrooms, no laundry mat…and I want to shave my legs." She broke down. This was more than what the woman could handle. Everyone stared at her, knowing that it is dangerous to get near a hysterical woman who needs to shave.
"I was adopted," Charlie reassured them.
Nearly ten minutes passed before Josha woke up from the trance.
"Well, everyone. We must look for some place to stay for the night, some wood for a fire and food to eat."
"He is right, lets settle down and after we have relaxed maybe we can come up with and idea of how to get out of here, and of what are we going to do with this criminals. For now let us be friends and help us out."
Everyone agreed with what Zack had suggested and got to work at it.
SCENE 4
Three hours later they found a cave to spend the night in. Although little it was still confortable for seventeen people to sleep in.
"This will have to do," Miguel said inspecting the cave. "Here we will spend the night. It is getting dark now and we must find wood and food still."
"Okay, lets split us in groups. We need a group for water supply, another for food supply, and another for the wood," Ivy stated.
"We'll handle the food, come on guys," Lee pointed at Armando, Josha, Zack, Miguel and Hugo.
"Then we will handle the water supply," Tatyanna said and Jasmine, Zahyra went with her. "You two are coming with us," she said pointing at Lars and Moe.
"Us, why us?"
"Who do you think will carry the water to the cave."
"Aaaaarrrggg… this is not our day."
"Now the only thing left is the wood," Ivy looked around, she saw Sara, Carmen, Hannah, and Paige where the only ones left. 'Well they'll do.'
"And we are supposed to do what?" Lina asked.
"You guys stay in the cave," Sara said pointing at Lina and Charlie.
"Doing what exactly?" Charlie stepped forward.
"If some one gets lost you can guide them with your voices. It is getting late now and with no lights to guide us we'll need to hear were we are going," Ivy explained them.
"OOOooooohhhh!" they said in unison.
"Now that it is agreed, lets go," Zahyra jumped out of the cave.
"Yeah," Armando, Josha ran from the cave and everyone else continued to jump out of the cave and start on their jobs.
SCENE 5
"Look a rabbit," Josha pointed out.
"Now quiet. Lay the trap Lee," Armando ordered. "Hugo take the left, Miguel take the right and try to cut it off. Josha, you and me are going to run it and drive it to the trap."
They all positioned themselves on their post. The rabbit had sensed danger but didn't move from its spot. Josha and Armando leaped onto him. He jumped their assault and run in the direction of the trap. He rapidly turn to the left but Hugo tackle it. He quickly turned to the right and passed below Josha and Armando with the speed of lightning. Miguel got a stick and swung at it. The rabbit was hitted and hopped blindly toward the trap. SNAP! Lee activated the trap and the rabbit was no more.
They all cheered and congratulated themselves, and agreed that the rabbit didn't went to the Bugs Bunny School for Rabbits and Hares. That is why it is good to stay in school and get an education. When they heard a rustle on other bushes. Another bunny! They looked at each other, and with this doctor Frankenstein smile proceeded to capture it. Look out Elmer Fudd, the Bunny Boys are at work.
SCENE 6
"This is all the water we can carry," Jasmine said looking at the thirty-two or thirty-four water containers.
"Now all that is left is to carry them back,*sigh*" Tatyanna sighted when she looked at the mountain where the cave was.
"We must hurry, it is getting pretty dark now," Zahyra pointed at the orange horizon. "And by the way, nice flowers Tatyanna. Were did you get them?"
"Along the other side," Tatyanna had small margaritas on her hair; they looked like a crown.
"I want some, come on lets go," Jasmine toke Zahyra's hand and pulled her.
When they got there they were shocked to see Lars and Moe with…with…margaritas all over their hair and in collars and bracelets.
"Hey girls, don't you think this flowers make me look beautiful," Lars posed like a Miss Universe.
"Yes, a beautiful hog," Moe pushed him and started to walk in a fashionably way.
"Ha, ha, ha, ha," the women started laughing and had no choice but to join the beauty pageant.
SCENE 7
"This is a vacation for a lifetime," Sara bends to pick up some branches.
"At least there is no ladder to walk under," Hannah said delighted.
"We should make a small house and then bring our Barbies and Kens and play family with it and…"
"SHUT UP, PAIGE!" everyone cut her off, including Ivy that already knew the phrase by heart.
"So Carmen this is the greatest caper you have ever planned," Ivy catched up to the thief, who was collecting bigger branches up ahead
"You don't know how right you are Ivy."
"Now that we are supposed to cooperate with each other, why don't you tell me what were you going to do with that castle. You never left us any clues. You only steal for the challenge, what was your game this time?"
"Nothing much. I just wanted a new house for the VILE headquarter. The last one had a slight problem last week."
"Slight, the conference room almost killed us when it fell nearly on our heads," Hannah said form a distance.
"A new house, who would have though," Ivy said atonished. "And where are you going to locate it Carmen?"
"Oh no, no, no, no, it takes more than a failed attempt at stealing, a struggle with a girl in your private jet, a 28 foot wave that almost killed you and the girl, a storm that damaged many of your high-tech equipment, a almost bitten by a snake arm, a struggle in a slump, your employees laughing at you, an interruption for a commercial break on airheads, saving your enemies, a future sleep on a dreaded cave, and a infinite look around for wood sticks, to loose my consciousness and mind," Carmen assured her.
"Wow! You are really tolerant."
"Patience is a virtue, they say. I called it a blessing."
SCENE 8
They all got to the cave safely and prepared the fire. Zahyra cooked the rabbits and they all ate them completely, or better yet devoured them completely. Nothing unusual happen during the dinner. They all ate quietly, no one said anything except, thank you or your welcome, or please.
Then they choose their respective places to sleep. ACME agents organized on a small corner and went to sleep. The VILE sat around the fire unable to sleep. (Hey they are night people.) After a little while Sara, Paige, Hugo and Lars and Moe were already on their third sleep. Hannah and Carmen were still looking at the fire, so they started to talk.
"So what is with the girl? She fallows you around all the time."
"She wants revenge for something I didn't do."
"Have you talked to her?"
"Sort of, but she is very stubborn and persistent." 'Like that father of hers. He was so stubborn.'
"And what was the thing that she says that you did, but you say you didn't?"
(Wow, now that is a composite question.) "She accuses me of being responsible for her father's death or better yet that I killed her father."
"But how, when, where?"
"In the Winston fire."
"No one escaped that fire, you must have needed more than extra good luck to even survive that, and no one did."
"Exactly, and to top it all up I was doing something very important that made it impossible for me to have killed her father."
"What are you waiting for? Tell her the truth."
"Now that would be smart, would it. Unfortunately I can't tell her the truth is to personal."
"I know the problem Carmen, here you can have my Belgian rabbits foot, it attracts extra good luck."
"Now don't patronize me, Hannah, I have enough problem on my mind to add a prayer to your Belgian rabbits spirits."
"Well, I am going to bed, but if you need it feel free to take it," she yawned and walked toward the others were.
Carmen decided to stare a little more at the fire and then go to sleep. She needed to clear her mind, she couldn't let her mind wander off to that night again. The night when she lost everything she had, the night when she became a thief.
End of Chapter 4