A/n: Hello! Sorry I haven't updated in what seems like years. I've been really busy/lazy.

Disclaimer: I don't own Voldemort or Peter, J.K. Rowling does; Sauron and Gollum belong to J.R.R. Tolkein; London is property of the English people/ maybe Tony Blair, I don't know.  I don't own Agrajag, he belongs to Douglas Adams and The Zars belong to William Norrison. Hmmm, I think that's it.

Next Thursday @ 3pm

Voldemort and Peter walk in to the pub to find Sauron waiting with Gollum.

"Good afternoon Sauron" Voldemort greeted them

"Hello Voldemort. So should we get started? I do have an appointment to make. I ordered a drink for you."

"Thank you and yes." replied Voldemort

Voldemort pulls out a piece of parchment and a fluffy pink quill. He puts on a pair of reading glasses that are bright red with rhinestones.

"For right now, I will function as both president and secretary.  First thing, I think we should make a list of people to invite.  Then we can design invitations and I'll order them."

Just then a waitress comes up carrying two milkshakes, one chocolate and one strawberry.  She gives the chocolate one to Sauron and the strawberry one to Voldemort.  Peter orders a cup of tea and Gollum spends ten minutes trying to explain about the 'nices fishiess'.

"So who else do you think should come?" asked Voldemort

"Dratted Bagginses" muttered Gollum

"What?" said Sauron, "Your not still going on about him are you, any ways he's not evil."

"Who is he?" asked Voldemort.

"A hobbit, who took Gollum's 'preciouss', which I might add belongs to me.  He's rather bitter about the whole thing." Answered Sauron.

"Oh. So back to our list." Said Voldemort. "I was thinking that we could invite Agrajag, you know that funny bat-thing who's always after that guy, Arthur Dent."

"He kind of strange. What about the Zars?" replied Sauron.

(A/n: The Zars. I'll explain because they come from a British book, kind of like Harry Potter, about the same age group appeal. The book (1st in a trilogy) is The Wind Singer by William Norrison. I've only read the 1st book because I can't find the 2nd book, but here's what I know about the Zars.  They are an army of teenagers who are infinite in number and they march around going Kill Kill Kill We are the Zars. They all look perfect and the wear white uniforms and are lead by a beautiful, young girl who twirls a baton.  Think of a unisex army of teenage Mary-Sues who want to take over the world & kill everyone, plus they have unlimited numbers. Truly scary.)

"Well I'm going to put down Agrajag and I'll think about the Zars, but I don't know." Said Voldemort "Now we need to design the invitations. I was thinking perhaps a lilac color and gold writing, in a nice flowing script with cute flower decorations. Maybe the invitations could smell nice too. And of course Embossed Envelopes with the club symbol, which we need to design, on them."

"Sounds great!" said Sauron. "Maybe the club symbol could be the letters EGC below a daisy."

"Wow! That's great, I thought of a sunflower, but I like daisies better. Hey! We could make daisy chains to give out to the new members for next time! Speaking of next time, you wanna to sleep over on Monday and make daisy chains, and I'll rent Driving Ms. Daisy and make popcorn." Exclaimed Voldemort.

"Sure. Listen, I got to go, I have an appointment to get a manicure. I'm going to get turquoise, it really matches my armor. See ya!"

A/n: What do you think? Do you think that they are smoking something? Maybe I am. Who knows? If anyone knows of any other evil characters in fantasy books, put it in your review & I will appreciate you greatly.   Oh I would like to say a huge Thank You! to AIT the Almighty Spork and Ax for reviewing.

stay chilly. phennphenn = P it snowed in paradise today

I wrote this when I had a snow day! So much fun! I got out @ 11 am!!!!!

~phennphenn, "whatever floats your bathtub!"