TITLE: Happy Now?
AUTHOR: Goddess Isa
EMAIL: goddessisa@aol.com
SUMMARY: Cordelia admits something to Angel
SPOILER: Hero. This one goes wayyyyyyy back
RATING: TV-PG
DISTRIBUTION: Knock yourself out. http://planetslaythis.homestead.com & fanfiction.net under Goddess Isa
DISCLAIMER: Joss owns the characters. Blech. "Beautiful Goodbye" is by Amanda Marshall. Where the HELL is she?
AUTHOR'S NOTES: This is OLD, and when I found it, I just had to share it.
Modified 1/23/02
"May I ask what you're doing?"
Cordelia didn't answer. Instead, she lit another match and set it on the candle plate, watching it burn until there was nothing left. Then, she picked up the matchbox and lit another.
"Cordelia."
"Shhhhh," she hushed, putting the match on the plate, repeating the process. "Listen. It's just starting."
"What is?" Angel asked, but he was ignored.
"I've been waiting to hear this all night," Cordy abandoned the matches to turn the radio up and sigh. She leaned back a bit, closed her eyes and listened.
//Fed up with my destiny
And this place of no return
Think I'll take another day
And slowly watch it burn
It doesn't really matter
How the time goes by
'Cause I still remember you and I
And our beautiful goodbye?
We traveled through these empty streets
Laughing arm in arm
The night had made a mess of me
Your confession kept me warm
And I don't really miss you
I just need to know
Do you ever think of you and I
And our beautiful goodbye?
If I let you down
Please forgive me now
For that beautiful goodbye
In these days of no regrets
I'll keep mine to myself
And all the things we never said
I can say for someone else
'Cause nothing lasts forever
But we always try
And I just can't help but wonder why
We let it pass us by
If I let you down
Please forgive me now
For our beautiful goodbye\\
When Cordelia opened her eyes, she was crying. She glanced at Angel and then ran to him, sobbing into his shoulder.
"It's just not fair," she whispered. "He was so young. So smart and so..."
"I miss him too." Angel said quietly.
"No," Cordy pulled away and wiped her eyes, smearing mascara all over her cheeks. "No, it's different for you. You didn't kiss him. You didn't...."
"Didn't what?" Angel pressed.
Cordy shook her head. "Nothing. I need to get going."
"Cordelia, wait," Angel moved so that he was in between Cordelia and the door. "I didn't what?" he asked in a calm voice.
Cordy sighed and looked everywhere but at Angel. "You didn't love him."
"Love? Cordelia—"
"Happy now?" she asked bitterly. "I loved him and it's too late. End of story." she pushed past him and bolted out of there before Angel could stop her.
"No," he said quietly to the room. "I never get to be happy." his eyes fell onto his favorite framed picture of Buffy. "Not anymore."
AUTHOR: Goddess Isa
EMAIL: goddessisa@aol.com
SUMMARY: Cordelia admits something to Angel
SPOILER: Hero. This one goes wayyyyyyy back
RATING: TV-PG
DISTRIBUTION: Knock yourself out. http://planetslaythis.homestead.com & fanfiction.net under Goddess Isa
DISCLAIMER: Joss owns the characters. Blech. "Beautiful Goodbye" is by Amanda Marshall. Where the HELL is she?
AUTHOR'S NOTES: This is OLD, and when I found it, I just had to share it.
Modified 1/23/02
"May I ask what you're doing?"
Cordelia didn't answer. Instead, she lit another match and set it on the candle plate, watching it burn until there was nothing left. Then, she picked up the matchbox and lit another.
"Cordelia."
"Shhhhh," she hushed, putting the match on the plate, repeating the process. "Listen. It's just starting."
"What is?" Angel asked, but he was ignored.
"I've been waiting to hear this all night," Cordy abandoned the matches to turn the radio up and sigh. She leaned back a bit, closed her eyes and listened.
//Fed up with my destiny
And this place of no return
Think I'll take another day
And slowly watch it burn
It doesn't really matter
How the time goes by
'Cause I still remember you and I
And our beautiful goodbye?
We traveled through these empty streets
Laughing arm in arm
The night had made a mess of me
Your confession kept me warm
And I don't really miss you
I just need to know
Do you ever think of you and I
And our beautiful goodbye?
If I let you down
Please forgive me now
For that beautiful goodbye
In these days of no regrets
I'll keep mine to myself
And all the things we never said
I can say for someone else
'Cause nothing lasts forever
But we always try
And I just can't help but wonder why
We let it pass us by
If I let you down
Please forgive me now
For our beautiful goodbye\\
When Cordelia opened her eyes, she was crying. She glanced at Angel and then ran to him, sobbing into his shoulder.
"It's just not fair," she whispered. "He was so young. So smart and so..."
"I miss him too." Angel said quietly.
"No," Cordy pulled away and wiped her eyes, smearing mascara all over her cheeks. "No, it's different for you. You didn't kiss him. You didn't...."
"Didn't what?" Angel pressed.
Cordy shook her head. "Nothing. I need to get going."
"Cordelia, wait," Angel moved so that he was in between Cordelia and the door. "I didn't what?" he asked in a calm voice.
Cordy sighed and looked everywhere but at Angel. "You didn't love him."
"Love? Cordelia—"
"Happy now?" she asked bitterly. "I loved him and it's too late. End of story." she pushed past him and bolted out of there before Angel could stop her.
"No," he said quietly to the room. "I never get to be happy." his eyes fell onto his favorite framed picture of Buffy. "Not anymore."