Welcome to Whose Line is it, Anyway? Chrono Trigger version! This was
requested by Brad. Thank you for requesting!!! Last time I played Chrono
Trigger was a really long time ago, so I might have something wrong. And I
didn't beat the game either, so I'm really confused about all that Schala,
Magus, Janus, Lavos stuff... All that. Despite that, enjoy! BTW, I know
Crono doesn't talk and I made him talk in this fanfic. But if he didn't
talk, then why the hell would he be in the fic? Oh, and I never got to Ayla
in the game, so I'm not sure if she has bad grammar or not. I'm making her
have good grammar, though.
TO : I'm sorry, but I've never played Legend of Dragoon. But if I can get out and rent a copy and play long enough to realize the characters, I'll DEFINETILY do a spoof for you! Even if it is in a few months. Thanks for requesting, though.
Disclaimer: I don't own Chrono Trigger... I do own Chrono Cross though. *gets beaten up* ...Geez. Hey, didn't I tell you to skip the disclaimers?! Go! Scroll down right now and never read a disclaimer again!
EPISODE 5: CHRONO TRIGGER
Akari is shown on the screen (yet again), this time in a strange room.
Akari: Hello and welcome to Chrono Trigger world!!!
Ryu appears.
Ryu: Hmm... Isn't this Crono's room? Where is Crono?
Some muffling is heard from under Crono's bed.
Ryu: Akari... What did you do?
Akari: *sweatdrop* I don't know what you're talking about.
Ryu: Did you tie up Crono and put him under the bed?
Akari: No! How dare you acuse me of such a thing?!
Ryu looks under the bed. Crono is laying there, tied up in bandages. His eyes are really wide and he's sweating.
Ryu: Aki!!! Why did you do this?!
Akari: Look, he wouldn't talk. I told him about this thing we were doing with the Whose Line? parodies and Crono didn't say anything. So then I told him he'd have to talk on the show and he still didn't answer, and look where this has led me...
Ryu: *sigh* Let's get him outta these...
Ryu unties Crono.
Crono: Thank God!
Akari: He...talks?
Crono: *looks at Akari* You! You're the Devil!
Akari: Who, me? *angelic Anime smile*
Crono: ...Stay away from me!
Crono hides.
Akari: *sigh* This job is so hard sometimes...
Ryu: You don't have to do this.
Akari: I don't?!
Ryu: No. Fanfic writing isn't a career.
Akari: Then why am I getting payed?...
Ryu: Um... That's not real money.
Akari stares at the weird shreds of paper in her hand.
Akari: Why me?!?!?!...
Ryu: Come on... We have to find some CT people and force them to play cheesy games.
Ryu and Akari dissapear in a cloud of red.
Crono: Which @#$%ing dimension were they from?
With Marle, Lucca, and Ayla... (Don't worry, no usage of porn this time. Maybe.)
The three girls have their back to you. They seem to be wearing robes and giant things on their heads...
Marle: Thank goodness the boys don't see us like this...
Akari and Ryu appear.
Lucca: AAAAHHHH!!!!
Ayla: It's a guy! Let's get outta here!!!
Akari: Oh, him?
Akari kicks Ryu, which causes him to go sprawling out the door. Akari locks the door.
Marle: Phew... Hey, who are you?
Akari: I am the infamous fanfiction writer ~Tifa Lockhart~ AKA Akari!!!
Ayla: ???
Lucca: ???
Marle: ???
Akari: ???
Marle: Hey, why'd you say ??? ?
Akari: Sorry, it's a habit. I even did that in Christmas Chaos!. Anyways, what are you doing?
Lucca: Can't you tell?
Akari looks over the girls and realizes they're wearing robes, turbans, and face masks.
Akari: Dear @#$%ing...
Ayla: It nourishes your skin. *Anime smile*
Akari: Yeccch... Hmm, wanna play a game?
Marle: ?
Akari: We're in the Whose Line? FF version fanfic.
Lucca: *freaks out* Looking like thish?!
Akari: Yep. *smiley*
Marle: ...AAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHH!!!!
Akari: Ahem. Just play the game.
Ayla: Which game?
Akari: The infamous never-before-played THREE HEADED BROADWAY STAR game!! In this, you will be a three headed broadway star hence the name. You'll sing a song to an audience member one word at a time, taking turns.
Marle: Oh, @#$%.
Ayla: Yeah, @#$%.
Lucca: Yay, I love thish game! Can I chooshe the member?
Akari: Are you drunk on sake? Cause the last three times...
Lucca is already in the audience, choosing a member. She comes down with...
Marle: *sigh* What are you doing here, Robo?
Robo: *shrugs* I just appeared here a moment ago.
Akari: Great, let's get on to the game. Now we need the audience to complete this sentence: Your ____ is so shiny.
Random audience members: Foot! Ear! Nose!
Akari: Sheesh... You people are losing your touch. Anyways, let's try ear.
Robo goes onstage and sits down. The girls surround him.
Akari: We have music provided by Selphie Tillmitt and Julia Heartilly.
Selphie and Julia wave. They then stick their tongues out at the screen.
Selphie: Irvine, if you're watching this, then--
Akari: Okay, that's enough, Selphie! Let's get on.
Julia: And Caraway, I'm gonna--
Akari: AHEM, I said let's get on!
After being bribed and being given inedible chunks known to them as 'cookies', Julia and Selphie start playing their piano and guitar.
Marle: Your
Lucca: ear
Ayla: is
Marle: so
Lucca: shiny!
Ayla: I
Marle: love
Lucca: the
Ayla: way
Marle: it
Lucca: um... shmells (smells; ya know Lucca's drunk).
Ayla: It
Marle: also
Lucca: tashtes
Ayla: delicious.
Marle: I
Lucca: like
Ayla: to
Marle: eat
Lucca: it
Ayla: too.
Marle: My
Lucca: favorite
Ayla: part
Marle: is
Lucca: the
Ayla: ...cartilage!
Marle: Since
Lucca: when
Ayla: was
Marle: this
Lucca: song
Ayla: about
Marle: cannibalism?
Lucca: Oh
Ayla: well,
Marle: let's
Lucca: sing
Ayla: it
Marle: again!!!
The song abruptly ends.
Akari: Dear lord! Ayla!!!
Ayla: What?
Akari: You just had to say 'cartilage'.
Ayla: Mmmm... Cartilage... *inspects Akari's new earring, pierced at her cartilage*
Akari: Eeeek! Get her away from me!!!
Akari dissapears in a purple glimmer.
Ryu: I better go too...
Ayla, realizing that Akari is gone, starts nearing up on Ryu.
Ryu: Aki, help!! *dissapers in a red flash*
Marle: Lucca... We have to get out of here...
Robo: Thank lord I don't have real ears.
Ahem... Next scene. We see Frog and Robo at... Funcoland? (Akari is losing her imagination.)
Frog: Oooooh, they have a copy of Xenogears for only $45.95!!! (They do at Akari's local Funcoland. No, really.)
Robo: And... EEEEEEK!!!!! They still have Final Fantasy VII merchandise!!! Here's the OST!!! (I wish.)
Frog: Omigosh, lemme see!!!!
Akari and Ryu appear.
Ryu: ...Why are we in Funcoland?
Akari: *whispering to Ryu* For the money they're paying us to advertise.
Ryu: Oh. How cheap of you.
Akari: *Anime-smile*
Frog: *realizing that Akari and Ryu are standing there* Whoa...
Robo: *realizing that too* Holy @#$%...
Frog: Not only do they have Final Fantasy VII merchandise, they hired Tifa and Cloud!!! ...Except those weird capes.
Akari: *confused* Huh???
Ryu: They mean that we look like Tifa and Cloud. Except these cheesy outfits.
Akari: Close. We are the infamous ~Tifa Lockhart~ and ~Cloud Strife~!!!
Robo: Erm... All you did was add the word 'Star' to the end of their names and add the last names.
Akari: ...Nice to meet you too. ~Cloud~ and I are AKA Ryu and Akari Raye.
Frog: So you're not Cloud and Tifa?...
Ryu: No. Just cheap resemblances.
Frog: *goes back to looking at crap*
Akari: Hey, don't ignore us! We are here to force you into my Whose Line? fanfiction!!
Robo: *sigh* Not again...
Akari: Eh??
Robo: Someone was here already, asking us to do weird things.
Akari: Well, you're gonna play my games anyways.
Ryu: We're gonna play the never-before-played GAME WITHOUT A TITLE IN THIS FANFICTION BECAUSE AKARI HASN'T WATCHED WHOSE LINE IS IT, ANYWAY? FOR THE LAST FOURTEEN DAYS AND HAS MISSED THE NAME TO THIS GAME BECAUSE SHE HAS INSTEAD TRIED TO DEFEAT FINAL FANTASY IX BUT COULDN'T AND STARTED CURSING AT NECRON!!!
Akari: Um... Let's call that game 'GWATITFBAHWWLIIAFTLFDAHMTNTTGBSHITTDFFIXBCASCAN' for short.
Ryu: Good idea. Anyways, the description to this game is... Akari has violently threatened the audience before the show to give her some suggestions of things they want to see Frog and Robo act out. So after pleading and more violence, the audience has places some cheap post-it notes in this hat. And Akari will now pick some out and force Frog and Robo to act them out.
Akari: ...Exactly! I couldn't have described it better. Let's start playing 'GWATITFBAHWWLIIAFTLFDAHMTNTTGBSHITTDFFIXBCASCAN'!!! *pulls a piece of paper from the hat* 'TV shows you never want to see'.
Frog: Hello, and welcome to a very special episode of 'Whose Line is it, Anyway? FF Edition: The TV show!!!'
Akari: *sigh...* Are you making fun of me? ...Move on.
Robo: Tonight, on Channel 147852369147852369... 'Boot Camp: Final Fantasy X Version'.
Akari: I don't know Robo, I'd actually like to see that. I'll have to make a fanfic on that. *pulls out another post-it note* 'People you will never find at a strip club'.
Frog: Akari!
Akari: ...I've been to plenty of strip clubs.
Robo: Ryu.
Akari: Let's be more original.
Frog: Aeris Gainsborough.
Akari: I said people you WOULDN'T see. *pulls out another post-it note* 'Cid Highwind's favorite passtime'.
Frog: Pornography.
Robo: Drinking.
Frog: Illegal drugs.
Robo: Swearing.
Akari: Okay, okay! Enough!!! *pulls out another post-it note* 'Reasons why Crono doesn't talk'.
Frog: Smoked too much.
Robo: Can talk fine, but secretly hates everyone.
Frog: Got beaten in the throat by Marle after cheating on her with Lucca!
Akari: No, you shouldn't be saying the truth, Frog!!! Let's end the game.
Akari and Ryu dissapear in a silver streak.
^^^COMMERCIAL^^^
Anouncer: If you have defeated all the Final Fantasies plus Chrono Trigger and are seeking for a harder RPG, then try... Pokemon!!! Just kidding. Try Chrono Cross! Let's see what people have to say about this revolution!
Camera shifts to a studio where a man is sitting in front of a PSX, playing Chrono Cross.
Anouncer: What do you think of this game?
Man: What's up with this @#$%ing battle system?!
Anouncer: Um... Let's ask someone else.
The camera shifts to someone next to the guy, also playing CC on a PSX.
Anouncer: What do you think of Chrono Cross?
Man: Where are all the characters?!
Anouncer: There are about 40.
Man: And the best developed one happens to be Mojo!!!
Anouncer: Ahem...
The camera goes to the last person in the studio, also playing CC.
Anouncer: What do you think?
Man: What is the storyline exactly? There are two options.
Anouncer: Well, it's--
Man: Even if you choose to have Glenn instead of Kid, you read Schala's book anyway! This sucks!!!
Anouncer: *sigh* Um, kids, just buy Chrono Cross. It's better than Kingdom Hearts.
Suddenly, Mr. T comes and beats up the anouncer.
Mr. T: Yo foo, you're nuts! Kingdom Hearts'll save ya a buck or two!
Anouncer: ...Ow...
^^^END OF COMMERCIAL^^^
Akari and Ryu are in Guardia Castle.
Akari: We're back with the semi-final game!!!
Ryu: And it is the UNLIKELY SUPERHEROES game!!
Akari: Let's go find Marle, Lucca, Crono, and Frog and torture them--I mean, play the game.
Akari and Ryu head off, wandering through the castle and looking for the four main CT characters. They don't go far when they're stopped by a guard.
Guard: Who do you think you are?
Akari: I gotta go see the Queen.
Guard: She and her friends are having a tea party! You may not enter this room!
Akari: A... tea party?
Guard: Leave at once!
Akari takes out a wand and zaps it at the guard. He freezes into a block of ice. Akari and Ryu walk into the room. Marle, Lucca, Crono, and Frog are on the floor, drinking tea.
Marle: Oh, you again. What do you want?
Akari: We're gonna play a game.
Lucca: We already did.
Ryu: But Crono never got to play one.
Frog: *whispering to Crono* Run away while you have the chance...
Akari: I heard that. Okay, let's play the UNLIKELY SUPERHEROES game!
Ryu: We need a suggestion from the audience to who Crono should be...
Marle: ...Audience?! I thought we were in Guardia Castle.
Akari: Deja vu... *faints*
Ryu: Oh, look what you did. Now Akari's out cold and I can't revive her! I don't posess Sorcery!
Marle: Who cares? Just throw her on the rug over there.
Ryu puts Akari on the rug in the corner.
Marle: Now what's about this audience?
Ryu: Well, we are in Guardia Castle but there's an audience outside and they can see what you're doing.
Marle: *smacks own forehead* So they saw what I was doing for the last hour?
Ryu: Even longer. *smiles Animey*
Marle: *whispering to herself* Oh, @#$%... They saw that little incident between me and Crono...
Ryu: Now we need a suggestion for the superhero that Crono's gonna be.
Random audience members: Dr. Hair Gel! Captain Hair Gel! Hair Gel Man!
Ryu: Captain Hair Gel it is. Listen Crono, you'll have to talk for this game.
Crono: *nods*
Ryu: Oookay. Now we need a problem for Captain Hair Gel.
Random audience members: Can't find hair gel! Ran out of hair gel! All hair gel in the world is gone!
Ryu: Okay, ran out of hair gel. Begin!!
Crono walks on the 'stage'.
Crono: And now, to get some hair gel and spruce up my nice hair... Holy Tigi, I've run out of hair gel!
Marle runs onstage.
Marle: What's that? You ran out of hair gel?
Crono: That's right, Princess Pornography Model!
Marle starts walking across the stage in a very 'stylish' way, showing off her body.
Marle: Sorry, I can't help you. All I know how to do is shake my body.
Lucca walks onstage.
Marle: Maybe Commander Hyperosity over here can help you!
Lucca spins around in a circle and smiles cheesily--in other words, does Yuffie's end-of-battle pose.
Lucca: Do you have any coffee?
Crono: No. You know where I can get hair gel?
Lucca: *shakes head* Must...have...coffee...GIMMECOFFEE!!!!!!
While Marle walks around the stage touching her body and Lucca spins and runs around, Frog walks on.
Lucca: Do you have coffee, Digest-Anything Man? Do ya, do ya, do ya?
Frog: Nope. All I have is this bottle of hair gel that I'm about to sit down and eat.
Crono: Nooooooooo! I need hair gel!!
Frog: I'm really hungry. If you let me eat something else, I'll give you the gel.
Crono hands Frog his katana.
Frog: Mmm! *eats the katana whole*
Crono: Finally, I can style my hair!! *squishes the whole bottle of hair gel onto his hair*
Ryu: Good, end the game!!
Akari suddenly wakes up.
Akari: Wha?... I missed the game?!
Ryu: Yep. Too bad.
Akari: At least I can see the credits.
Akari and Ryu transport to the set of Whose Line? where the CT team is gathered.
Crono: Huh? Weren't Lucca, Marle, Frog, and I just in Guardia Castle?...
Akari: Whatever. Let's see Ayla and Robo do the credits as two lovers screaming at each other!!
Ayla: *sigh*
Robo: Yay!!!
Akari: Start!
Ayla and Robo walk onstage.
Ayla: I'm tired of you cheating on me with Marle, Robo! I'm gonna go off and marry Frog!
Robo: Why Frog? Weren't you involved with Lucca?
Ayla: How dare you!!!
Robo: Well, you were!
Ayla: Hmph. At least Crono's hotter than you.
Robo: Look Ayla, I'm tired of you! I'm gonna go spend the night with Akari!
Ayla: Don't bother, I'll go to Ryu's house!
Robo: How can you? They live in the same house!
Akari: That was probably the worst set of credits ever. This game has hardly any party members. Anyways to you loyal readers, stay tuned for the Chrono Cross edition of Whose Line!!! Bye!!!
~*~*~
The Chrono Cross edition will be the next chapter and the final one of this fanfic. So read it and please review!!!
TO : I'm sorry, but I've never played Legend of Dragoon. But if I can get out and rent a copy and play long enough to realize the characters, I'll DEFINETILY do a spoof for you! Even if it is in a few months. Thanks for requesting, though.
Disclaimer: I don't own Chrono Trigger... I do own Chrono Cross though. *gets beaten up* ...Geez. Hey, didn't I tell you to skip the disclaimers?! Go! Scroll down right now and never read a disclaimer again!
EPISODE 5: CHRONO TRIGGER
Akari is shown on the screen (yet again), this time in a strange room.
Akari: Hello and welcome to Chrono Trigger world!!!
Ryu appears.
Ryu: Hmm... Isn't this Crono's room? Where is Crono?
Some muffling is heard from under Crono's bed.
Ryu: Akari... What did you do?
Akari: *sweatdrop* I don't know what you're talking about.
Ryu: Did you tie up Crono and put him under the bed?
Akari: No! How dare you acuse me of such a thing?!
Ryu looks under the bed. Crono is laying there, tied up in bandages. His eyes are really wide and he's sweating.
Ryu: Aki!!! Why did you do this?!
Akari: Look, he wouldn't talk. I told him about this thing we were doing with the Whose Line? parodies and Crono didn't say anything. So then I told him he'd have to talk on the show and he still didn't answer, and look where this has led me...
Ryu: *sigh* Let's get him outta these...
Ryu unties Crono.
Crono: Thank God!
Akari: He...talks?
Crono: *looks at Akari* You! You're the Devil!
Akari: Who, me? *angelic Anime smile*
Crono: ...Stay away from me!
Crono hides.
Akari: *sigh* This job is so hard sometimes...
Ryu: You don't have to do this.
Akari: I don't?!
Ryu: No. Fanfic writing isn't a career.
Akari: Then why am I getting payed?...
Ryu: Um... That's not real money.
Akari stares at the weird shreds of paper in her hand.
Akari: Why me?!?!?!...
Ryu: Come on... We have to find some CT people and force them to play cheesy games.
Ryu and Akari dissapear in a cloud of red.
Crono: Which @#$%ing dimension were they from?
With Marle, Lucca, and Ayla... (Don't worry, no usage of porn this time. Maybe.)
The three girls have their back to you. They seem to be wearing robes and giant things on their heads...
Marle: Thank goodness the boys don't see us like this...
Akari and Ryu appear.
Lucca: AAAAHHHH!!!!
Ayla: It's a guy! Let's get outta here!!!
Akari: Oh, him?
Akari kicks Ryu, which causes him to go sprawling out the door. Akari locks the door.
Marle: Phew... Hey, who are you?
Akari: I am the infamous fanfiction writer ~Tifa Lockhart~ AKA Akari!!!
Ayla: ???
Lucca: ???
Marle: ???
Akari: ???
Marle: Hey, why'd you say ??? ?
Akari: Sorry, it's a habit. I even did that in Christmas Chaos!. Anyways, what are you doing?
Lucca: Can't you tell?
Akari looks over the girls and realizes they're wearing robes, turbans, and face masks.
Akari: Dear @#$%ing...
Ayla: It nourishes your skin. *Anime smile*
Akari: Yeccch... Hmm, wanna play a game?
Marle: ?
Akari: We're in the Whose Line? FF version fanfic.
Lucca: *freaks out* Looking like thish?!
Akari: Yep. *smiley*
Marle: ...AAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHH!!!!
Akari: Ahem. Just play the game.
Ayla: Which game?
Akari: The infamous never-before-played THREE HEADED BROADWAY STAR game!! In this, you will be a three headed broadway star hence the name. You'll sing a song to an audience member one word at a time, taking turns.
Marle: Oh, @#$%.
Ayla: Yeah, @#$%.
Lucca: Yay, I love thish game! Can I chooshe the member?
Akari: Are you drunk on sake? Cause the last three times...
Lucca is already in the audience, choosing a member. She comes down with...
Marle: *sigh* What are you doing here, Robo?
Robo: *shrugs* I just appeared here a moment ago.
Akari: Great, let's get on to the game. Now we need the audience to complete this sentence: Your ____ is so shiny.
Random audience members: Foot! Ear! Nose!
Akari: Sheesh... You people are losing your touch. Anyways, let's try ear.
Robo goes onstage and sits down. The girls surround him.
Akari: We have music provided by Selphie Tillmitt and Julia Heartilly.
Selphie and Julia wave. They then stick their tongues out at the screen.
Selphie: Irvine, if you're watching this, then--
Akari: Okay, that's enough, Selphie! Let's get on.
Julia: And Caraway, I'm gonna--
Akari: AHEM, I said let's get on!
After being bribed and being given inedible chunks known to them as 'cookies', Julia and Selphie start playing their piano and guitar.
Marle: Your
Lucca: ear
Ayla: is
Marle: so
Lucca: shiny!
Ayla: I
Marle: love
Lucca: the
Ayla: way
Marle: it
Lucca: um... shmells (smells; ya know Lucca's drunk).
Ayla: It
Marle: also
Lucca: tashtes
Ayla: delicious.
Marle: I
Lucca: like
Ayla: to
Marle: eat
Lucca: it
Ayla: too.
Marle: My
Lucca: favorite
Ayla: part
Marle: is
Lucca: the
Ayla: ...cartilage!
Marle: Since
Lucca: when
Ayla: was
Marle: this
Lucca: song
Ayla: about
Marle: cannibalism?
Lucca: Oh
Ayla: well,
Marle: let's
Lucca: sing
Ayla: it
Marle: again!!!
The song abruptly ends.
Akari: Dear lord! Ayla!!!
Ayla: What?
Akari: You just had to say 'cartilage'.
Ayla: Mmmm... Cartilage... *inspects Akari's new earring, pierced at her cartilage*
Akari: Eeeek! Get her away from me!!!
Akari dissapears in a purple glimmer.
Ryu: I better go too...
Ayla, realizing that Akari is gone, starts nearing up on Ryu.
Ryu: Aki, help!! *dissapers in a red flash*
Marle: Lucca... We have to get out of here...
Robo: Thank lord I don't have real ears.
Ahem... Next scene. We see Frog and Robo at... Funcoland? (Akari is losing her imagination.)
Frog: Oooooh, they have a copy of Xenogears for only $45.95!!! (They do at Akari's local Funcoland. No, really.)
Robo: And... EEEEEEK!!!!! They still have Final Fantasy VII merchandise!!! Here's the OST!!! (I wish.)
Frog: Omigosh, lemme see!!!!
Akari and Ryu appear.
Ryu: ...Why are we in Funcoland?
Akari: *whispering to Ryu* For the money they're paying us to advertise.
Ryu: Oh. How cheap of you.
Akari: *Anime-smile*
Frog: *realizing that Akari and Ryu are standing there* Whoa...
Robo: *realizing that too* Holy @#$%...
Frog: Not only do they have Final Fantasy VII merchandise, they hired Tifa and Cloud!!! ...Except those weird capes.
Akari: *confused* Huh???
Ryu: They mean that we look like Tifa and Cloud. Except these cheesy outfits.
Akari: Close. We are the infamous ~Tifa Lockhart~ and ~Cloud Strife~!!!
Robo: Erm... All you did was add the word 'Star' to the end of their names and add the last names.
Akari: ...Nice to meet you too. ~Cloud~ and I are AKA Ryu and Akari Raye.
Frog: So you're not Cloud and Tifa?...
Ryu: No. Just cheap resemblances.
Frog: *goes back to looking at crap*
Akari: Hey, don't ignore us! We are here to force you into my Whose Line? fanfiction!!
Robo: *sigh* Not again...
Akari: Eh??
Robo: Someone was here already, asking us to do weird things.
Akari: Well, you're gonna play my games anyways.
Ryu: We're gonna play the never-before-played GAME WITHOUT A TITLE IN THIS FANFICTION BECAUSE AKARI HASN'T WATCHED WHOSE LINE IS IT, ANYWAY? FOR THE LAST FOURTEEN DAYS AND HAS MISSED THE NAME TO THIS GAME BECAUSE SHE HAS INSTEAD TRIED TO DEFEAT FINAL FANTASY IX BUT COULDN'T AND STARTED CURSING AT NECRON!!!
Akari: Um... Let's call that game 'GWATITFBAHWWLIIAFTLFDAHMTNTTGBSHITTDFFIXBCASCAN' for short.
Ryu: Good idea. Anyways, the description to this game is... Akari has violently threatened the audience before the show to give her some suggestions of things they want to see Frog and Robo act out. So after pleading and more violence, the audience has places some cheap post-it notes in this hat. And Akari will now pick some out and force Frog and Robo to act them out.
Akari: ...Exactly! I couldn't have described it better. Let's start playing 'GWATITFBAHWWLIIAFTLFDAHMTNTTGBSHITTDFFIXBCASCAN'!!! *pulls a piece of paper from the hat* 'TV shows you never want to see'.
Frog: Hello, and welcome to a very special episode of 'Whose Line is it, Anyway? FF Edition: The TV show!!!'
Akari: *sigh...* Are you making fun of me? ...Move on.
Robo: Tonight, on Channel 147852369147852369... 'Boot Camp: Final Fantasy X Version'.
Akari: I don't know Robo, I'd actually like to see that. I'll have to make a fanfic on that. *pulls out another post-it note* 'People you will never find at a strip club'.
Frog: Akari!
Akari: ...I've been to plenty of strip clubs.
Robo: Ryu.
Akari: Let's be more original.
Frog: Aeris Gainsborough.
Akari: I said people you WOULDN'T see. *pulls out another post-it note* 'Cid Highwind's favorite passtime'.
Frog: Pornography.
Robo: Drinking.
Frog: Illegal drugs.
Robo: Swearing.
Akari: Okay, okay! Enough!!! *pulls out another post-it note* 'Reasons why Crono doesn't talk'.
Frog: Smoked too much.
Robo: Can talk fine, but secretly hates everyone.
Frog: Got beaten in the throat by Marle after cheating on her with Lucca!
Akari: No, you shouldn't be saying the truth, Frog!!! Let's end the game.
Akari and Ryu dissapear in a silver streak.
^^^COMMERCIAL^^^
Anouncer: If you have defeated all the Final Fantasies plus Chrono Trigger and are seeking for a harder RPG, then try... Pokemon!!! Just kidding. Try Chrono Cross! Let's see what people have to say about this revolution!
Camera shifts to a studio where a man is sitting in front of a PSX, playing Chrono Cross.
Anouncer: What do you think of this game?
Man: What's up with this @#$%ing battle system?!
Anouncer: Um... Let's ask someone else.
The camera shifts to someone next to the guy, also playing CC on a PSX.
Anouncer: What do you think of Chrono Cross?
Man: Where are all the characters?!
Anouncer: There are about 40.
Man: And the best developed one happens to be Mojo!!!
Anouncer: Ahem...
The camera goes to the last person in the studio, also playing CC.
Anouncer: What do you think?
Man: What is the storyline exactly? There are two options.
Anouncer: Well, it's--
Man: Even if you choose to have Glenn instead of Kid, you read Schala's book anyway! This sucks!!!
Anouncer: *sigh* Um, kids, just buy Chrono Cross. It's better than Kingdom Hearts.
Suddenly, Mr. T comes and beats up the anouncer.
Mr. T: Yo foo, you're nuts! Kingdom Hearts'll save ya a buck or two!
Anouncer: ...Ow...
^^^END OF COMMERCIAL^^^
Akari and Ryu are in Guardia Castle.
Akari: We're back with the semi-final game!!!
Ryu: And it is the UNLIKELY SUPERHEROES game!!
Akari: Let's go find Marle, Lucca, Crono, and Frog and torture them--I mean, play the game.
Akari and Ryu head off, wandering through the castle and looking for the four main CT characters. They don't go far when they're stopped by a guard.
Guard: Who do you think you are?
Akari: I gotta go see the Queen.
Guard: She and her friends are having a tea party! You may not enter this room!
Akari: A... tea party?
Guard: Leave at once!
Akari takes out a wand and zaps it at the guard. He freezes into a block of ice. Akari and Ryu walk into the room. Marle, Lucca, Crono, and Frog are on the floor, drinking tea.
Marle: Oh, you again. What do you want?
Akari: We're gonna play a game.
Lucca: We already did.
Ryu: But Crono never got to play one.
Frog: *whispering to Crono* Run away while you have the chance...
Akari: I heard that. Okay, let's play the UNLIKELY SUPERHEROES game!
Ryu: We need a suggestion from the audience to who Crono should be...
Marle: ...Audience?! I thought we were in Guardia Castle.
Akari: Deja vu... *faints*
Ryu: Oh, look what you did. Now Akari's out cold and I can't revive her! I don't posess Sorcery!
Marle: Who cares? Just throw her on the rug over there.
Ryu puts Akari on the rug in the corner.
Marle: Now what's about this audience?
Ryu: Well, we are in Guardia Castle but there's an audience outside and they can see what you're doing.
Marle: *smacks own forehead* So they saw what I was doing for the last hour?
Ryu: Even longer. *smiles Animey*
Marle: *whispering to herself* Oh, @#$%... They saw that little incident between me and Crono...
Ryu: Now we need a suggestion for the superhero that Crono's gonna be.
Random audience members: Dr. Hair Gel! Captain Hair Gel! Hair Gel Man!
Ryu: Captain Hair Gel it is. Listen Crono, you'll have to talk for this game.
Crono: *nods*
Ryu: Oookay. Now we need a problem for Captain Hair Gel.
Random audience members: Can't find hair gel! Ran out of hair gel! All hair gel in the world is gone!
Ryu: Okay, ran out of hair gel. Begin!!
Crono walks on the 'stage'.
Crono: And now, to get some hair gel and spruce up my nice hair... Holy Tigi, I've run out of hair gel!
Marle runs onstage.
Marle: What's that? You ran out of hair gel?
Crono: That's right, Princess Pornography Model!
Marle starts walking across the stage in a very 'stylish' way, showing off her body.
Marle: Sorry, I can't help you. All I know how to do is shake my body.
Lucca walks onstage.
Marle: Maybe Commander Hyperosity over here can help you!
Lucca spins around in a circle and smiles cheesily--in other words, does Yuffie's end-of-battle pose.
Lucca: Do you have any coffee?
Crono: No. You know where I can get hair gel?
Lucca: *shakes head* Must...have...coffee...GIMMECOFFEE!!!!!!
While Marle walks around the stage touching her body and Lucca spins and runs around, Frog walks on.
Lucca: Do you have coffee, Digest-Anything Man? Do ya, do ya, do ya?
Frog: Nope. All I have is this bottle of hair gel that I'm about to sit down and eat.
Crono: Nooooooooo! I need hair gel!!
Frog: I'm really hungry. If you let me eat something else, I'll give you the gel.
Crono hands Frog his katana.
Frog: Mmm! *eats the katana whole*
Crono: Finally, I can style my hair!! *squishes the whole bottle of hair gel onto his hair*
Ryu: Good, end the game!!
Akari suddenly wakes up.
Akari: Wha?... I missed the game?!
Ryu: Yep. Too bad.
Akari: At least I can see the credits.
Akari and Ryu transport to the set of Whose Line? where the CT team is gathered.
Crono: Huh? Weren't Lucca, Marle, Frog, and I just in Guardia Castle?...
Akari: Whatever. Let's see Ayla and Robo do the credits as two lovers screaming at each other!!
Ayla: *sigh*
Robo: Yay!!!
Akari: Start!
Ayla and Robo walk onstage.
Ayla: I'm tired of you cheating on me with Marle, Robo! I'm gonna go off and marry Frog!
Robo: Why Frog? Weren't you involved with Lucca?
Ayla: How dare you!!!
Robo: Well, you were!
Ayla: Hmph. At least Crono's hotter than you.
Robo: Look Ayla, I'm tired of you! I'm gonna go spend the night with Akari!
Ayla: Don't bother, I'll go to Ryu's house!
Robo: How can you? They live in the same house!
Akari: That was probably the worst set of credits ever. This game has hardly any party members. Anyways to you loyal readers, stay tuned for the Chrono Cross edition of Whose Line!!! Bye!!!
~*~*~
The Chrono Cross edition will be the next chapter and the final one of this fanfic. So read it and please review!!!