Oh yay.. author's notes. These are harder to write than the fic 0_o
All disclaimers apply, don't hurt me for writing this, e-mail me if
ya really really want to and yeah.. enjoy the
show...story...fic..whatever.
******
"Haruka-san, can I talk to you?" I had been putting this off for a
few days and tomorrow we were leaving, I really didn't want to do
this. She came into the room, she smiled a bit and sat down in front
of me." Well Taiki, Yaten and I are going on a tour and we can't..
bring you." I saw the expression on her face change and she looked
extremely crestfallen.
" Maybe I can tag along without anyone knowing." I shook my head.
" No Haruka-san." I could see the pleading look in her eyes.
" Please, I.. I want to stay with you." She looked at me hopefully. "
Why not?" I knew she was going to try to come. I could see it in her
eyes, she didn't want to stay in Tokyo.
" I don't want you to come." I said quietly, I knew she heard me as
she pulled away slowly. Tears glistened in her eyes.
" Why?" Her voice was thick with emotion.
" You aren't acting like yourself now, you will soon, I don't want to
be there when you get your memory back." I looked at her, she looked
like a caged animal trying to flee but being unable. Why am I doing
this to her. I don't want to hurt her. Do you want her to hurt you,
the voice in my head asked maliciously. I have to do this, to protect
myself, I'm not going to be on Earth forever anyway. In my mind the
final battle with Galaxia replayed itself, more precisely her role in
the battle. She betrayed her princess, Usagi forgave her but .. she
went against her princess, she doesn't even know how much Usagi hurt
because of her. I felt anger boil inside me. I can't let that happen,
not to myself. I looked at her again. She's in pain. She deserves it,
the voice in my head tried to convince me, suppressing my conscience.
" I don't want to be your friend." I saw her shoulders sag slightly
and she looked down at the floor. She suddenly stood up and grabbed
the bag we brought her from Michiru's house. She walked quickly to
the door and put her shoes on. She turned to us.
" Thank you for letting me stay with you. I'm sorry I was such a
nuisance." I looked into her eyes, they were as cold as I remembered
them, she turned.
" Haruka-san, we'll call Michiru to find somewhere you can go." I
offered going to her.
" I can take care of myself." She turned and left. I hit my head
against the wall and slid down in curling myself into a ball. What
have I done. I pulled my legs in tighter. I saw her smiling face then
the intense pain, the pain that I caused. I'm a despicable creature.
Out of the corner of my eye I could see Yaten and Taiki crouching
beside me. Taiki was .. petting me, I knew she was trying to make me
feel better, she can't, I'm a despicable person. Yaten was a few
steps away.
" What did you say to her?" Her voice sounded a bit shaky and I
looked up at her, she looked slightly emotional, the way she looks
after she feel something very strong. "You just had to tell her that
we can't take her on tour, you didn't have to be cruel Seiya." I saw
Taiki glare at her. I'm an evil person, why did I do that.
" I didn't want to hurt her, I didn't think she'd react that way."
Yaten came towards me and sat down beside me, she pulled me into a
loose hug. We stayed that way for a bit. I'm glad that I have them as
my best friends, I couldn't survive without them.
*******
I walked out of Seiya's apartment. Where am I supposed to go now. A
cold wind blew, chilling my already freezing body. I tried not to
think of what just happened. I felt tears burn in my eyes but I
fought them back. Why was she... stop thinking about it Haruka. I
broke out into a run, my hitting my legs as I ran. I didn't care
where I was going, I just wanted to get away.
After a while I stopped, the pain in my chest was unbearable, and
looked around, there were small houses around me, I turned in a
circle realizing that I was lost. I picked a direction and started
walking, my breath came in ragged gasps. It's not like I was going
anywhere in particular anyway. I stopped at a bus depot, there was a
map of Tokyo's bus route. I looked at it, trying to find anything
familiar that might tell me where I should go, not finding anything I
went across the street to a park and sat down on a bench. I reached
into my bag, maybe there is something in here. I searched through it
finding three sets of keys and two addresses. I picked on and then
went to find a map from somewhere. The sun was already setting and I
pulled the sweatshirt closer to my cold body, it was going to be a
long night.
After an hour I found a tourist booth and bought a city map, I
realized I was half way across the city from where I should be. I set
of, not having anywhere else to go. I passed by a beach on my way, I
felt the tears burn in my eyes, I tried not to remember the pain in
my chest. ' I don't want to be your friend.' The words echoed in my
head. Pain resonated in my heart. Don't think about it Haruka. It was
too late. I sat down on a log, tears spilling from my eyes, why does
everyone hate me. I can see a cliff above the ocean, jagged rocks
underneath. Why don't I just jump. I can't. I'm a coward. No wonder
everyone hates me.
**********************
Yay I got 4 out. I thought it would be different but.. I think I
liked how it turned out.I know they are all quite a bit ooc but...
it's my fic.. if ya don't like don't read. Send me flames if you
want.. trust me I've gotten plenty.. they all make me laugh quite
hard.. especially the people who have worse grammar than I do. Oh and
the people who spell Haruka and Michiru wrong are also just great.
Relax people it's a fanfic. Oh a little quirk of my writing that I
feel I should share... I really like changing from past to present
tense when I'm writing a first person story, you've probably noticed,
I don't know why I do this but when I go back and try to fix it I
confuse myself. i've got the storyline for this finished I jsut..need
to write it. If you want spoilers they are in my LJ on my page. Well
that's all I can think of right now. Oh I also want to kiss all the
people at Hamena for making a word wrapping utility thingy.. people
would pay money for that..... seriously.
Ps. Don't you want to hit Seiya?
All disclaimers apply, don't hurt me for writing this, e-mail me if
ya really really want to and yeah.. enjoy the
show...story...fic..whatever.
******
"Haruka-san, can I talk to you?" I had been putting this off for a
few days and tomorrow we were leaving, I really didn't want to do
this. She came into the room, she smiled a bit and sat down in front
of me." Well Taiki, Yaten and I are going on a tour and we can't..
bring you." I saw the expression on her face change and she looked
extremely crestfallen.
" Maybe I can tag along without anyone knowing." I shook my head.
" No Haruka-san." I could see the pleading look in her eyes.
" Please, I.. I want to stay with you." She looked at me hopefully. "
Why not?" I knew she was going to try to come. I could see it in her
eyes, she didn't want to stay in Tokyo.
" I don't want you to come." I said quietly, I knew she heard me as
she pulled away slowly. Tears glistened in her eyes.
" Why?" Her voice was thick with emotion.
" You aren't acting like yourself now, you will soon, I don't want to
be there when you get your memory back." I looked at her, she looked
like a caged animal trying to flee but being unable. Why am I doing
this to her. I don't want to hurt her. Do you want her to hurt you,
the voice in my head asked maliciously. I have to do this, to protect
myself, I'm not going to be on Earth forever anyway. In my mind the
final battle with Galaxia replayed itself, more precisely her role in
the battle. She betrayed her princess, Usagi forgave her but .. she
went against her princess, she doesn't even know how much Usagi hurt
because of her. I felt anger boil inside me. I can't let that happen,
not to myself. I looked at her again. She's in pain. She deserves it,
the voice in my head tried to convince me, suppressing my conscience.
" I don't want to be your friend." I saw her shoulders sag slightly
and she looked down at the floor. She suddenly stood up and grabbed
the bag we brought her from Michiru's house. She walked quickly to
the door and put her shoes on. She turned to us.
" Thank you for letting me stay with you. I'm sorry I was such a
nuisance." I looked into her eyes, they were as cold as I remembered
them, she turned.
" Haruka-san, we'll call Michiru to find somewhere you can go." I
offered going to her.
" I can take care of myself." She turned and left. I hit my head
against the wall and slid down in curling myself into a ball. What
have I done. I pulled my legs in tighter. I saw her smiling face then
the intense pain, the pain that I caused. I'm a despicable creature.
Out of the corner of my eye I could see Yaten and Taiki crouching
beside me. Taiki was .. petting me, I knew she was trying to make me
feel better, she can't, I'm a despicable person. Yaten was a few
steps away.
" What did you say to her?" Her voice sounded a bit shaky and I
looked up at her, she looked slightly emotional, the way she looks
after she feel something very strong. "You just had to tell her that
we can't take her on tour, you didn't have to be cruel Seiya." I saw
Taiki glare at her. I'm an evil person, why did I do that.
" I didn't want to hurt her, I didn't think she'd react that way."
Yaten came towards me and sat down beside me, she pulled me into a
loose hug. We stayed that way for a bit. I'm glad that I have them as
my best friends, I couldn't survive without them.
*******
I walked out of Seiya's apartment. Where am I supposed to go now. A
cold wind blew, chilling my already freezing body. I tried not to
think of what just happened. I felt tears burn in my eyes but I
fought them back. Why was she... stop thinking about it Haruka. I
broke out into a run, my hitting my legs as I ran. I didn't care
where I was going, I just wanted to get away.
After a while I stopped, the pain in my chest was unbearable, and
looked around, there were small houses around me, I turned in a
circle realizing that I was lost. I picked a direction and started
walking, my breath came in ragged gasps. It's not like I was going
anywhere in particular anyway. I stopped at a bus depot, there was a
map of Tokyo's bus route. I looked at it, trying to find anything
familiar that might tell me where I should go, not finding anything I
went across the street to a park and sat down on a bench. I reached
into my bag, maybe there is something in here. I searched through it
finding three sets of keys and two addresses. I picked on and then
went to find a map from somewhere. The sun was already setting and I
pulled the sweatshirt closer to my cold body, it was going to be a
long night.
After an hour I found a tourist booth and bought a city map, I
realized I was half way across the city from where I should be. I set
of, not having anywhere else to go. I passed by a beach on my way, I
felt the tears burn in my eyes, I tried not to remember the pain in
my chest. ' I don't want to be your friend.' The words echoed in my
head. Pain resonated in my heart. Don't think about it Haruka. It was
too late. I sat down on a log, tears spilling from my eyes, why does
everyone hate me. I can see a cliff above the ocean, jagged rocks
underneath. Why don't I just jump. I can't. I'm a coward. No wonder
everyone hates me.
**********************
Yay I got 4 out. I thought it would be different but.. I think I
liked how it turned out.I know they are all quite a bit ooc but...
it's my fic.. if ya don't like don't read. Send me flames if you
want.. trust me I've gotten plenty.. they all make me laugh quite
hard.. especially the people who have worse grammar than I do. Oh and
the people who spell Haruka and Michiru wrong are also just great.
Relax people it's a fanfic. Oh a little quirk of my writing that I
feel I should share... I really like changing from past to present
tense when I'm writing a first person story, you've probably noticed,
I don't know why I do this but when I go back and try to fix it I
confuse myself. i've got the storyline for this finished I jsut..need
to write it. If you want spoilers they are in my LJ on my page. Well
that's all I can think of right now. Oh I also want to kiss all the
people at Hamena for making a word wrapping utility thingy.. people
would pay money for that..... seriously.
Ps. Don't you want to hit Seiya?