Ranma 1/2 and his folks belong to Takahashi-sama and whomever she sold the rights to. Mishima Heavy Industries and the characters associated with it belong to Yuzo Takada among other people. (At least I think they do, I could be wrong.) This is just for fun, and no copyright infringement is intended. Other characters appearing in this fic belong to me, Warren Phillips. Some characters who do not appear, but are mentioned, belong to my good friend Chris Roxby and are mentioned with his permission. (Hey Chris, where's the $400 you owe me?)

Insert traditional "This was my first fic, be gentle" request here.

------

Block. Block. Step back. Block. Dodge and grab. Pull, twist and throw.

My 'opponent', a dark-haired girl about four years younger than me, hits the tatami but is up again quickly. So far in this sparring match I've found out a few things. First, she's nowhere near as fast as I am. Second, she has some holes in her defense. Third, for someone who doesn't weigh 50 kilos, she hits pretty hard. I found that out when I blocked one of her punches instead of dodging. For some reason she seemed surprised. Before she recovered, I landed a light punch to her mid-section. She chastised me for this, indicating she wasn't fragile, but I'm still not attacking all out. We're only sparring.

She approaches a little more cautiously this time and I decide to go on the offensive for a bit.

High kick. (Missed.) Three punch combo. (Blocked.) Low kick. (Jumped over, and I dodge her return kick.) Grab her leg before she can retract fully, twist and push. This leaves her face down on the mat.

Again, the quickness of her recovery surprises me a touch. Unfortunately (for her anyway), she charges and attempts a straight punch intended for my nose. I sidestep and trip her.

She turns the fall into a shoulder roll and pivots toward me again. "I deserved that," she says while straightening her yellow gi.

My Japanese is now at the point where I understand her. Which, considering I've been seriously studying it for only six weeks, isn't too bad. "Yes, you did," I answer in my horrible American accent.

We spar for another ten minutes. She does tag me with a couple scoring punches, but takes several punches and kicks from me. She seems happy when I signal to stop.

"Thank you Anderson-sensei," she says, smiling. "When Ranma and I spar, he just dodges and that makes me so mad. It's nice to actually spar."

"Tendo-san, it's 'Anderson-sensei' only when we are at school. Anywhere else, you can call me Jeff. I'm not _that_ much older than you," I reply. This sort of thing seems excessively important to the Japanese. But then I'm only a stray gaijin, what do I know?

"Only if you call me Akane, ne?"

"I'll do that." Then something she said a moment ago clicks. "Who's Ranma?" I ask.

Her smile disappears without a trace. She goes into a short, heartfelt speech, most of which I miss due to the speed with which the words come. Selected words I pick out include "baka", "hentai", "hakuchi" and "iinazuke". I recognize the first two as meaning fool and pervert, I think hakuchi is idiot and I whip out my pocket dictionary to find the last means fiance. She rumbles to a stop once she notices I have the dictionary out.

"Gomen sens- Jeff. It's just that sometimes he makes me so mad."

"So why is someone you don't like your fiance?" I ask while returning the dictionary to my back pocket.

"It's a long story, but the short version is 'It's all our fathers' fault'," she replies. "Can we talk about something else?"

"Sure. How about our sparring session?"

Struggling with my admittedly poor vocabulary, I give her the good news first. She's (surprisingly) strong, she recovers quickly and her endurance is good. Then the bad news. She's excessively aggressive and doesn't react well to being grappled. She is also slow by my standards. I don't tell her the last one because most people are slow by my standards.

She also has a few comments about my fighting style or lack thereof. I don't fight from a set stance and I've never formally studied martial arts in my life. I do practice, as fighting is a large part of my soon to be former profession. But when Bill was born, it was time to change my chosen path to one a little less likely to wind up with my son becoming half an orphan. Trouble will manage to find me anyway, so I still stay in shape. If I'd wanted a dull life I'd never have been a super hero in the first place, let alone a 'retiring' super hero.

Akane implies I'm not aggressive enough. I tell her that it was only a sparring match. She also calls my technique "poor, yet effective". I give her that one as she's right. I've always considered myself an 'adequate' hand to hand combatant when I don't use my telekinesis. I'm fast enough and strong enough that technique doesn't come into play when I fight the average goon. I'll admit I'm a much better fighter using a staff, but in close quarters that isn't an option. I prefer to work on my weaknesses. My strengths take care of themselves.

I bow out of the dojo, say my goodbyes to Akane and find Nabiki. "O.K. Tendo-san," I begin. "You've got yourself a deal. 3000 yen per hour for the dojo time, half that if I'm sharing the facility when I'm here."

"Thank you very much Anderson-sensei."

"Like I told your sister, it's 'Anderson-sensei' only when we are at school. Otherwise, please, call me Jeff."

"All right then, since you're a paying customer, you can call me Nabiki... When we're not at school," she says smirking. She then asks, "Will you be paying as you go, or do you want to set up an account?"

Even having met Tendo Nabiki for the first time three days ago, I already know how seriously she treats anything that involves money. Laughing, I reach for my wallet and tell her, "I figure I'll be here an hour or two a day, probably three times a week. How about I give you 30,000 yen to start and you tell me when I've gone through it. And I'll need a receipt."

We hash out a few details, (such as martial arts lessons not being included in the price) I give her the cash and get the receipt even though I can't read it. (I'm just starting to figure out katakana and hiragana, but I'm still fairly clueless with kanji.) Before I leave, Nabiki introduces me to her older sister Kasumi and to her father Soun.

Tendo Kasumi has a quiet serenity about her that makes her even more beautiful than she would be otherwise. She is taller than her sisters, with long brown hair. (I like long hair on women, just ask my wife.) I'm a happily married man, but if I wasn't, I might have asked her out at some point.

Tendo Soun strikes me as a stolid martial arts type with his long hair and calm countenance. He's dressed in a brown gi and seems happy that I am renting time at his dojo. Although for some reason he also looks relieved that I'm not actually asking for lessons. Something I'll worry about later. Right now I need to call home and that is best accomplished by getting to my room. Unfortunately.

I hop on my bicycle and make quick work of the 25 klicks back to my rented room. This driving on the left stuff bugs me some, but not near as much the cramped quarters. I swear, my father-in-law has closets that are bigger than this place. But still, it has room for a futon, a small private bathroom, a microwave, a TV and a dorm fridge. I can live with it, but I don't like it. I call home and leave a message on voice mail for my wife because with the time difference I don't want to risk waking her up. Lil' Bill had just started to sleep through the night when I left for Japan and I don't want to wake him up either. Monster, my computer set up, is still testing access pathways into the Mishima Heavy Industries network. I look at the one photograph of my wife and son that I brought with me from home and think about why I'm here in the first place. The rest of the evening is spent watching television and working on my vocabulary.

--------

The next morning, I'm up with the sun, do my hundred push ups and go outside for room to do my stretching routine. Afterwards, I grab my backpack, briefcase and gym bag and bike to Furinkan High School. I hit the coach's shower and change before I haul myself to the third floor. "Memo to self... Find someplace to eat breakfast." Some of what the Japanese consider food is enough to make me nauseous. That, and I just don't get miso soup and rice for breakfast. Maybe I can fly down to Okinawa on Sunday, sneak into the PX or something and get stuff I consider real food.

Before I came to Japan, I used my hacking skills to make it look like I was a college student doing my junior year abroad as a student teacher. If anyone checks, the City University of New York shows me as being a junior Education major with a 3.89 GPA. Actually, all I have is a GED because my parents kicked me out of the house when I was 16, two months before I would have graduated high school. Of course, I had already earned enough money programming computers by then that I didn't care. Later on, when I started in the super hero business, money stopped being a problem. When I got short on cash, I'd do some freelance programming work and make enough to keep me in the black. Being able to generate 2000 lines of code a day and have it work the first or second try is a very salable skill.

Anyhow... I drag myself to class about 10 minutes before the bell and start going over the lesson plans Serizawa-sensei has prepared for me. (In English no less, bless the man.) There's a rumble of thunder in the distance, which I ignore because I'm daydreaming about sausage gravy and biscuits. Then there is an explosion. I rush to the window and see two young men. The first is a fairly tall one wielding a bokken and dressed in what I think is called a hakama. I'll have to check my reference materials later. The other is wearing black pants and a red shirt and is standing in front of what used to be one of the support pillars for the school gates.

I'm out the window as the tall guy starts thrusting his bokken at the other one at a rate of speed I haven't seen outside the costumed set. It takes about two seconds for me to reach the ground. (A little TK to slow my fall.) By this time, bokken guy has made at least twenty attacks and hasn't connected with any of them. The kid in the red shirt is just flat dodging them. Not stepping back out of range, not blocking them in any way, just not being where the wooden sword is. I've seen a lot, but I haven't seen anything like it since Fastball died.

I can cover the 20 meters between me and them in about 2 seconds. It turns out I don't need to. The kid in the red shirt says something to a girl I recognize as Tendo Akane, just before dodging a strike to the head and calmly kicking the kendoist in the stomach, solar plexus and temple so fast it almost looks like one motion.

"What's going on here!" I shout in English, before I remember myself and try again in Japanese.

"Oh Anderson-sensei, don't worry, it was just Kuno-sempai," Akane states as if that explains everything.

"Yeah, he started it," the red-shirted youth says also as if that explains everything.

Tendo Nabiki arrives and looks at the scene with a certain disdain. "Oh Kuno-chan, when will you ever learn?" she asks of no one in particular. "Anderson-sensei, allow me to introduce my sister's fiance Saotome Ranma," indicating the still standing young man with a wave of her hand. Pointing down she continues, "This large lump is Kuno Tatewaki. He's in my class."

"Then why haven't I seem him before?" I ask.

"I could tell you for 500 yen," she counters.

I _know_ she's serious, but before I can decide if I want to pay or not, Ranma interrupts my train of thought with, "Aw, I think his sister poisoned him again."

Make that train wreck of thought. While I ponder this tidbit of information, the early bell rings to indicate that we should all be heading to class. Nabiki indicates she'll take Kuno to the nurse's office.

Nabiki comes to class about 5 minutes late, but with a note from the nurse. Kuno-san comes in about 10 minutes later, looking remarkably well for a man that was unconscious less than half a hour ago. He has no note, but Serizawa-sensei doesn't ask for one. Since yesterday he made a girl stand in the hall with a water bucket for being 20 seconds late, it makes me wonder why Kuno gets special consideration.

I find out quite a bit at lunch in the teacher's lounge. Seems Kuno is the principal's son and the captain of the Kendo Club. That explains that. I also find out that Kuno's feud with Saotome Ranma has been going on since the day Ranma arrived. Kuno was the best fighter in school until Ranma's arrival too. There's also something about Tendo Akane, but I don't get the whole picture before lunch break is over. Although several of the teachers speak at least passable English, I'm using Japanese as much as possible because I need the practice. I won't eat lunch here again though. Too many smokers.

Despite what happened this morning, I've seen plenty of weird stuff in my life and don't think I'll see anything too freaky by the time I leave. The only thing that still bugs me after lunch is the unanswered question "What caused that explosion?"

-----

After school, the various school clubs meet. Of interest to me this day is the Kendo Club of which Mr. Kuno is the captain. Entering the practice area, I see that Kuno is sitting on a tall pile of mats while the rest of the club either sits on the floor or is paired off in duels. Across from Kuno there are two posters on the wall, one of Tendo Akane and one of a cute red-haired girl. For the most part, the students practice without padding or helmets, which seems dangerous to me. Practical maybe, but I'm surprised the school is willing to risk the liability. But then again, this is Japan, things work differently here.

Kuno notices my arrival and lightly leaps from his place to land in front of me, his bokken at the ready. "Who dares interrupt the sacred majesty which is the Furinkan High School Kendo Club and more importantly disturbs myself, the rising star of the Kendo world, the Undefeated 'Blue Thunder', Kuno Tatewaki?"

Actually, he goes on like this for a couple of minutes and I'm catching maybe one word in three as I try to do a running translation in my head. Well, my language skills aren't the greatest yet, so I decide to play nice.

"I beg your pardon Kuno-san, I am student-teacher Jeffery Anderson. This is the Kendo Club, is it not?" I inquire in my best humble tones.

"It is."

"I have some interest in bujutsu. May I observe your club and with your permission perhaps duel some of the members?" I could see him ponder my request. I think it was the fact that I had been polite that convinces him. I pegged him as a pompous loud mouth, that type responds well to flattery and exaggerated politeness. Whatever the cause, Kuno agrees to my request and sends his second to arrange the membership in a challenge line.

As the first two students square off, I split my attention between Kuno and the match. Kuno watches the bout with minimal interest, as if his mind is elsewhere. He stays this way through the first four matches until one of them is won by a lower ranked member. Kuno's attention snaps back to the practice area and he issues orders for the two students to change places in the challenge line. It stays while the same student wins again and rises another notch. But after that, it wanders off again as the rest of the matches go to the higher ranked students. When Kuno's second defeats his opponent, the matches stop.

"And what do you think of the prowess of the Furinkan High School Kendo Club, Anderson-sensei?" Kuno asks me after the last match is over.

"Very nice, Kuno-san," I reply. I've fought swordsmen a couple of times before. From what I saw this morning, I think Kuno is probably better than any of them. Kuno is probably better with his sword than I am with my staff, but I think it would be close in a fair fight. However there's more to a fight than just raw skill, add my TK and he's toast.

Kuno's second hands me a bokken and I start challenging the line. The first four matches are over in seconds. I'm fast and I've got a good 10 to 15 centimeter reach advantage over most of my opponents and I use it ruthlessly. I win three more matches before I take my first hit. Two matches later I take my second one. There are only 5 members of the club left, and I work through 3 of them before Kuno's second beats me. I could have taken him with a staff.

"Your style is very... unorthodox," Kuno states in a tone that leaves no doubt that he is not impressed. Or happy with the performance of his club.

Quickly dredging my memory, I tell him, "Italian sword styles are designed to look sloppy, but still be effective." I read that somewhere once. It might even be true. It seems to mollify Kuno somewhat. After some small talk, I leave and as I start to bicycle home I can see in the distance an odd looking aircraft flying over the city. Wishing that I hadn't left my binoculars in New York, I watch it fly toward the headquarters of Mishima Heavy Industries. "I'm not ready to deal with them yet Rich," I tell myself. "Your ghost is just gonna have to wait."

-----

Another night, another hundred words for my vocabulary. The morning is uneventful until I'm just a few klicks from the school. That's when a purple haired girl on a bicycle blows past me the other way doing about 75 klicks an hour. There's a large box strapped to the back of the bike and during the split second I see her face, she has a sappy grin on it. Braking to a stop, I turn to look at her. It's really weird when she 'hops' the bike to the top of a fence and starts riding along that for a bit before dropping off the other side. "Well, _that_ was strange," I tell myself.

I just get back up to speed when another bicycle passes me from behind. This one is going at least 90 kph and is ridden by a girl with long pink hair, wearing a school uniform. She has a passenger, a boy of grade school age who is holding on for dear life.

"Yeeeeeee HAAAAA!!!!" he shouts.

I look ahead and see a rail crossing ahead. The gates are down and the train will be there in seconds. She doesn't slow down, just 'hops' up on a hatchback, skips over to a truck, and then jumps over the train to the top of a pedestrian walkway.

Aw fork it. I follow, using my TK for the jumps, but she's long gone by the time I get across the train. My definition of strange may need work.

I get to school, shower and get ready for classes to start. A hunch tells me not to go upstairs yet, so I head to the school gates. Repairs on the gate support pillar have already been made. I watch as students stream in, some looking at me with interest, some ignoring me, some I recognize from my class who say "Ohayoo sensei" and a few muttering "gaijin" in voices I'm not supposed to hear. Getting close to the bell, Tendo Akane runs in with two girls. One I recognize as the red-haired girl whose picture was with Akane's in the Kendo Club practice hall. The other is a pretty girl with brown hair tied up in a white ribbon, wearing a double bandoleer of spatulas over a boy's school uniform and with a large pizza spatula strapped to her back. The red-haired girl is dressed in the same type of outfit Ranma wore yesterday, only in a looser fit. She's also dripping wet.

"Careful Tendo-san, you don't want to be late for class," I tell her.

"Hai Anderson-sensei," she replies.

At this point Kuno comes striding over, bokken at the ready. When he sees the arrivals, his demeanor changes instantly. "Pig-tailed girl!" he shouts and latches onto the red head in a death grip.

"Back off pervert!" the girl in question yells. Breaking his grip, she punches him toward the brown haired girl while saying, "Ucchan, catch."

The brown haired girl unlimbers her large spatula and swats Kuno back toward the red head. At this point Akane smacks the red head on the noggin with a mallet. (Mallet?? Where did that mallet come from?) Kuno flies over the prostrate red-head and lands in a heap on the grass.

"Ranma, we don't have time for this. You know what sensei said he'd do if we were late," Akane says with an irritated voice. (Ranma? Must be somebody else with the same name.) She then turns to the other girl, "Give me a hand will you Ukyo?" The two girls then drag the third toward the school, leaving me with Kuno. By the time they reach the doors, the red head is walking under her own power.

I check Kuno over and take him to the nurse's office. Personally, I think he deserved it. If I were a woman and some guy tried that, he'd be lucky to walk away from it. I make sure to get a note from the nurse before I head to the third floor and Serizawa-sensei. You never know.

-----

It's a nice day, so I decide to eat lunch outside. Under some trees, the Ranma I met yesterday is sitting and reading some manga. The brown haired girl from this morning has a miniature grill set up nearby and is furiously cooking something. No sign of Akane or the redhead. Curious, I wander over. Getting closer, I discover whatever it is smells great. I decide to introduce myself.

"Hello, I'm Jeff Anderson, I'm a student teacher here for the next few weeks. You're Ukyo, right?" I think I said that right.

Not pausing in her cooking, she looks up at me and answers, "Yes, I'm Kuonji Ukyo sensei. What can I do for you?" I'm have trouble understanding her, her accent is bit 'off' from what I've been hearing. While I'm trying to compose my answer, she scoops up what is on the grill, slaps it on a paper plate and shouts "Hey Ran-chan, catch!" while winging it to him.

I watch Ranma scarf whatever it is with obvious delight. "Delicious as always Ucchan!" he chokes out around a mouthful of food.

"What is that stuff?" I ask of Ukyo, my stomach audibly growling.

"Okonomiyaki," she says with a bright smile. She continues, "When it comes to okonomiyaki, I'm the best!"

"Ya sure are!" Ranma interjects.

I whip out my pocket dictionary, but don't find 'okonomiyaki'. I know the 'yaki' part means food. 'Konomi' is listed as 'liking, preference, choice. 'O' at the start of a word can mean 'great' or 'large'. Great choice food? No matter how much I study Japanese, I don't think I'll ever understand it.

Ukyo sees my confused face and says, "Here, I'll make you one," and gets busy at her grill.

Ranma gets up, strolls over to us and asks, "Hey, what about me?"

"You've still got the lunch Kasumi packed you," Ukyo states in a reasonable voice. "Besides, it's always nice to introduce someone to okonomiyaki."

While Ukyo is busy cooking, I ask Ranma, "Kasumi? Tendo Kasumi? You know her?"

"Well, yeah... Me and Pops live with the Tendos."

"I didn't see you when I went to rent time at the dojo."

"That was you? Me and Pops were out trainin' after school. We musta just missed you."

"Must have." I think for a bit and continue. "So, Akane is your fiancee?"

"Yeah" he answers, continuing under his breath "uncute tomboy."

"I'm Ran-chan's 'cute' fiancee," interjects Ukyo.

"You have two fiancees?" I ask, interestedly.

"Three, if you count Shampoo. I don't, but everyone else does."

"Three?" I blurt out loud, while a small part of my mind goes "Shampoo?" Monsters don't bother me. Villains trying to kill me are a regular part of my existence. Talking cats, I almost consider normal. Relationships still confuse the heck out of me. I'm glad I found Anne and married her with so little trouble. I can't imagine what it must be like with three fiancees.

Ukyo adds, "What about Kodachi?"

"I don't even wanna _think_ about her," Ranma states emphatically before shuddering.

Four fiancees? Before we get to five, I change the subject. "Akane seemed happy to spar with me. You don't spar with her?"

"I don't hit girls."

"What if the girl hits first?" I think about some of the people I've fought in three plus years in the super hero business. An attitude like that can get you very dead.

"Well, it's not like Akane can hit me anyway. She's way too slow."

Between what I saw yesterday with Kuno and my sparring match with Akane, Ranma must have some serious speed. Akane is not very fast, but she's not _that_ bad. Before I can comment on that, Ukyo presents me with a plate of okonomiyaki. I still don't know what it is, but it's pretty good. The nearest thing I can think of is a cross between a pancake, an omelette and maybe pizza. "Mmm... MMM... This is great! You should open a restaurant."

"Already did Anderson-sensei", Ukyo informs me, grinning.

Swallow. "Where?!? This is best food I've had since I got to Japan!"

She actually blushes at the comment. Ranma 'hmmpfs' and goes back to his tree and starts eating from a bento box. I pull out my map of the Nerima district and have Ukyo mark the location of her restaurant. No chance I'm missing out on food I can eat. I've been eating way too much instant ramen and far too many tuna fish sandwiches. A lot of what I like to eat is very expensive here. I was going to try some of that "Kobe beef" I've heard about when I first got here, but didn't feel like blowing two hundred bucks.

Ukyo makes her own lunch, then shuts off her grill and cleans it. The three of us then sit down and talk for a bit. They ask me what college is like. I lie. From what I understand, getting into college in Japan is the hard part, but once you're there it's a piece of cake. The warning bell rings and Ukyo leaves to put her grill away. Ranma and I head to the school doors. "So where's Akane and the other Ranma?" I ask.

"Other Ranma?"

"Cute girl, yeah high, red-hair, came in with Akane and Ukyo this morning, dresses like you." Looks a bit like him too, now that I think about it.

"Oh... That's my... cousin Ranko." He doesn't seem too thrilled by my description of his cousin.

"Could have sworn Akane called her 'Ranma' this morning." I know damn well she called the other girl Ranma. I pay attention to details like that. "Maybe your fiancee likes you more than she lets on? Getting your names mixed up like that."

Ranma laughs nervously, "No... That's not it."

I'm not going to push him on this. Besides, I'll probably see him later when I go to Tendo dojo for my workout after school. We're close to the front doors when a voice rings out.

"Ranma! PREPARE TO DIE!!"

END PART 1

In Part 2: If you can't guess who it is, why are you reading this?