A/N I just had an awful day so I need to take my anger out doing something

Hermione opened her eyes. Her first thoughts were   Am I dead?   She blinked. No she defiantly wasn't unless heaven was the hospital wing. She moaned and struggled to sit up. She looked around. Some sixth year girls with carrots coming out of their ears were sitting on two chairs looking apprehensive.  Ah the vegatalbus curse. I hear the cure for that is somewhat nasty.  Hermione's thoughts suddenly returned to why she was in here.  Stupid!  She thought. I had my reasons but now I am glad I am alive.

Her thoughts were interrupted by a forlorn looking little boy coming out from Madame Pomfrey's office. He looked up and his eyes lit up.  

'Mommy!'

  'Benjy!' He rushed over to her, she bent down to hug him. The bandages on her wrists mad her think  why did I ever try to leave him?   

'I missed you Mommy Daddy never had time to play with me.' 

'Oh that stinks. Hey where are your crutches?'

  'They got broked.'

 'Oh? Just how did your crutches break?'

  'Daddy tried to fix the handles they were hurting.'

  'Urgh he should have taken them to Hogsmeade, the Magical Mechanics there give us a discount for God's sake.'

  'Ms. Granger!'

  'Professor McGonagall!'

  'I am glad to see you are awake Mr Weasly and Mr Potter will be glad to know.'

  'Has has Harry been worried been worried about me?'

  'I should say so!' Hermione blushed. 'I should say that was a stupid thing for you to do Hermione.'

  Hermione hung her head. 'I know I regret it now but at the time.'

  'I understand when I was about your age my best friend did the same thing. She however was not quite as lucky.'

  'You mean-'

  'I am afraid so.' The hospital wing door opened. 'Ah Ms Weasly I will go now and leave you two, Mr Benjy would you like to come down for dinner with me?' Benjy sent a questioning look Hermione's way.

  'Go ahead.' Benjy unsteady with just his braces nodded and took the professor's out stretched hand. When they were gone Hermione shifted her gaze to the bed sheets she couldn't look her best friend in the eye.

  'Hi Ginny.' She murmured.

  'HERMIONE HOW? WHY? WHAT CROSSED YOU MIND?'

  'Oh Ginny I was so miserable it was the day we first became friends. The day my life started almost. I was friendless until then. Seven years later where am I? Back to where I started. I just felt like I couldn't handle it. I am still not sure how I'm gonna take it.'  

  'Didn't you think about who you were leaving? The last thing Benjy needed was to loss another mother. And Harry was worried sick.'

  'What?'

  'Oh he still loves you he just doesn't like that he can't trust you.'

  'He can but everyone has there secrets dammit.'

  'I know. I know. Oh Hermione I am so glad you are okay. When I heard I was mad at first.'

  'I know. Judging from how you bit my head off five minutes ago.'

  'Yeah. I just couldn't think what I would do without you. You cheered me up when Creepy dumped me.'

  'I know. I'm so sorry' With this Hermione burst into tears. Ginny sat  on the bed next to her and hugged her.

  'Shhhh your okay now.'

  'I-I-I k-k-now b-b-ut what if I-I had succeeded.'

  'I don't know. But you lived Hermione now you have to use that gift. You were meant to live. I know that if Seamus hadn't gotten sick-'

  'Huh?'

  'Oh Seamus got sick during the feast. He went up to the common room and found your note on the table. He got Professor McGonagall You had lost so much blood by then. We almost thought we lost you but you lived.'

  'Oh I am sorry.'

  'I know. I had better get down to dinner I'll tell the boys you okat. You'd better write your Mum and Dad.' Hermione nodded.

  'Thank you Ginny for being there.'

  'You're welcome.' Hermione settled into her pillows.

  'Madame Pomfrey may I have some parchment?'

  'Oh of course dearie,' Hermione procesed to write a heart felt leter to her parents. As she finished the door banged open and Ron stormed in followed more quietly by Harry.

  'HERMIONE WHAT POCESSED YOU TO DO SUCH A STUPID THING?!?!?!'

  'Oh Ron I just was well I couldn't cope.'

  'With what? You're Head Girl for Heaven Sake.'

  'Oh shit Ron that isn't as important as friends and then I felt as if I had none.'

  'Hermione you did if I did something like that my brothers-' that gave her an Idea.

  'What if you didn't have friends, didn't win the house cup, got bad marks.'

  'Okay. Okay I guess I see where you're coming from.' Hermione glad he got it overted her gaze to Harry he looked ready to kill. She turned back to Ron,

  'Where's Benjy?'

  'Ginny's watching him show off on that toy broomstick of his.'  She smiled. Harry took  this time to speak.

  'Ron I want to talk to Hermione alone.'

  'Okay only gimme your wand I don't trust that wand hand of yours.' If Harry got mad he tended to well... use his magic.

  'Oh here.' Ron pocketed the wand

  'I'll give it back to you later. Bye Hernione glad you're okay.'

  'Bye Ron.'

   Harry didn't yell at her. He sat there for a minute than spoke very quietly.

  'Hermione Benjy was in a right state. The Monday after you. You well that Monday when I picked him up he was crying, He didn't understand  Madame Pomfrey had to inject you with blood every hour for a week! He didn't know why you wouldn't wake up. Do you know how hard it was for us? Hermione I still care for you though after this I don't know.'

  'Harry...'

  'Just give me time. You really hurt me.'

  'Harry I'm sorry.' She was crying by then.

   'I know but sorry doesn't help just give me time.'

  'Okay.'

  'Good bye Hermione.'

  'Good bye Harry.' He left her then she cried for quite awhile she then slept.

   She slept til noon the next day. She was still recovering. She did her homework and played with Benjy. She stayed in the hospital wing for two more days. When Madame Pomfrey was sure her wounds were healed and she was okay she let her go, The last wxamination made her late for Transfiguration.

   After going to the dormitory to get her books she rushed into the classroom.

  'Sorry Professor.'

  'That is quite all right Ms Granger glad to have you back. Have a seat.'  She sat down next to Ron who was now talking to her Yahoo. Harry was on Ron's other side Harmione tried not to look at him.

   As she faced front she noticed the students craning to try and get a look at her. Silently she thanked Madame Pomfrey for using a no scar potion on her wrists. She listened while Professer Macgonagall told them that if somehow if when they transfiqured someone a mandrake draft would surfice to heal them.

   Hermione tried her best to pay attention but her mind wandered.  What does he need time to do? I know I hurt him but I aplogized!  She then thought of times in her life when she had been reluctant to forgive. 3rd year perhaps?

  'Ms Granger.'

  'Yes ma'am?' she said startled.

  'What is the spell to change a human into a hare?'

  'Bigneheray' she muttered. This was soo simple.

  'Correct Ms Granger this is easy for you is it not?'

  'Yes Professor it is.' Hermione reluctently admitted. She had studied ahead of time when she had no friends.

  'Hmm come see me after class.'

  'Yes Professor.'  The class kept on Hermione sat vaguly listening. Then the bell rang.

  'Ms Granger if you please.'

  'Go on Ron I'll see you in potions.'

  'Okay'

  'Yes Professor?'

  'Hermione I think you might be the type to be able to become an animagus.'

  'Me Professor?' Hermione gasped.

  'Yes' McGonagall smiled. 'You Ms. Granger come see me tomarrow evening.'

  'Of course Professor.' Hermione beaming left even Snape couldn't shade her triumph. Or could he?

  'You are late Granger.'

  'I'm sorry Professor, Professor McGonagall wanted me.'

  'Never the less five points from Gryffindor!'

  'But Professor!'

'Sit down Mr. Weasly. You too Ms Granger if you don't want to loss furthe rpoints Madame Mental.' Hermione cringed Ron and even Harry started to stand she put her hand on thier shoulders.

  'Stop it, I'm not worth 500 points from Gryffindor.' Reluctantly the boy sat she suffered through to the end of the lesson until she began to clean her knife. Then Snape came up behind her

  'Are you sure that's safe for you Granger.' Hermione writhed with silent anger.

  'I assure you Professor I am perfectly stable and I would apprechiate it if you would cease to mention my mistake.' She muttered. Snape throughly surprised didn't reply.

  'That was wicked Hermione' Ron told her when they were headed to dinner.

  'Thank you Ron he deserverd it. I have learned to not let him get to me. Are you coming with me to get Benjy?'

  'Why not?' So they went off to the hospital wing.

  'What is wrong with Harry?' she asked her red headed friend.

  'He's hurt. He'll come around.' Benjy threw himself at her and agian she wondered why she did it.

   The next day at breakfast Harry rscived a letter from a barn owl his hands shook as he read it. He got amazingly pale and rushed up to the high table. What was that? Hermione wondered watching him. 

You see me sitting here
A smile upon my face
The time has come but you know that it's not too late
There's been too many things
Together we have seen
It's not that hard if we start to believe                                                                                    And we're not gonna take anymore
Can we try to erase all the pain
So please…                                                                                                                          So me reason give me a sign
Tell me the way we, fall out of line
Is it today or is it tonight?
We'll find, the answer to our life
This world is not at ease
We seem to hide the truth
Thinking there's only so much we can really do
It's up to you and me
To fix our destiny
The jury's here, so let's take the stand
And we're not gonna take anymore
Can we try to erase all the pain
So please…                                                                           
Show me a reason, give me a sign
Tell me the way we, fall out of line
Is it today or is it tonight?
We'll find, the answer to our life
So tell me why we have to cry (and not try)
When there's so many things we can do                                               To help this troubled world start anew
I need a reason, I need a sign
There's no turning back, I'm here by your side
Is it today or maybe tonight, (we'll find)
The answer to our life
Show me the way
Give me a sign
Tell me the way we fall out of line
Is it today, is it tonight
The answer to our life
Show me a reason, give me a sign
Tell me the way we, fall out of line
Is it today or is it tonight?
We'll find, the answer to our life                                                                  
Show me a reason, give me a sign
Tell me the way we, fall out of line
Is it today or is it tonight?
We'll find, the answer to our life

   Disclaimer: HP is not mine but the Goddess JK Rowlings Answer To Our Life is by Backstreet Boys

   A/N I love cliffies! Read my other fics please. I might write sooner if Poor Little Orphan Boy  and Emily's Lake are Reviewed. R&R

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