WARNING: Before you proceed any further there is a reference to rape in this next chapter. I don't go in depth, don't dote on the subject, and do nothing that would pass a pg rating, but the warning is still here, for your knowledge. Please be advised. This is a recording.

Ahem, now that that's done with….Another chapter! More reviews! (I swear, you're trying to inflate my ego now…Don't stop!) Ah, not much babble for this chapter, I'm too exhausted from writing it to babble at this point…. Man, this was one chapter that was not easy, in ANY way. Read and you'll see why, well, maybe…

Oh, I am fully aware of the different mindsets of people, and therefore, when I hint at something but never state the fact oughtright, you may get different ideas. For this chapter, allow your mind do go as dark/ deep as you wish to. If your mind rests in the gutter, enjoy. (Though this not to say I even approach smut, or ANYTHING of the sort.)

Same disclaimers. Same story. Why do I even bother this late on? Oh well. Don't sue. I never said I own anything….

Please R&R

Peace, Love and Anarchy!

~The Elemental

Walk Through the Fire

Chapter 16

Narratives of Pain

Duo looked through the open door where the bird had just sped, his face mirroring Hotaru's own horror and shock. Faintly, the back of his mind was piecing together portions of conversations he'd had, looping the information back until Duo had to accept the fact that Stryke was right…

…No one is supposed to know the cave even exists, never mind be able to get in. And last I checked no one could leave but her……The. Green. Lady. It's her cave…… Sure, I'll send you back……Call me Djana. It's my true name……Dead? You're certain. The girl's name was Mai?……That was Djana Treebound. The Green Lady……… The girl in the cave, if my guess is correct, was Mai Treebound……… Djana's daughter……God Duo, what have we done?…

This was no mistake, no coincidence. They were the reason Mai was dead, even if they hadn't killed her outright, it was their fault...But one thing was blatantly obvious, he had to keep Hotaru from sinking back into whatever Djana had pulled her from. Something told him that if she sank back, she'd never come out again.

"Duo…"

"I know Hotaru. What am I supposed to say?"

"I don't know. What can we do? We've killed her daughter, how can we expect her to help us now?"

"We'll figure something out. We just need to think a bit…."

"Ah! There you are!" Ri came bustling into the room, a whirlwind of energy. "Stryke said you'd be here, said you'd be staying the night. I'm glad, I dinna' want to see you turned into trees, now did I? But where did my Lady fly off to? She was practically running out her dress she was going so fast! My! Well, let's get you two back to your rooms so I can get some cleaning done, shall we? Come along, come along!" She shoed them with her hands, and continued to shoo them down the hall. "Your lady-friend seems to have woken up" She winked to Duo, then half-turned so Hotaru could see more than her back. "I'm glad. My name's Riannas, but call me Ri." She continued down the hall. "Now you two are guests, so you have the run of the upper floors, should you want to walk a bit. There is a library and a gaming court, along with art rooms filled with treasures. Please make yourselves comfortable, but whatever you do, don't leave the upper levels in anything other than an emergency. There are anti-intruder spells activated downstairs and if you don't know about them, you're likely to end up caught in one of my lady's spells. Here are your rooms, I'd suggest you get some sleep soon, I've been told my lady has agreed to help you first thing tomorrow. And I know my lady. When she says 'first thing' she means dawn. I'll wake you before so you'll be ready. Fair night, Hotaru, Duo." She bowed again and left them at their rooms, taking their quiet in stride. She'd disappeared down the hall long before Duo had even thought to reply to her.

When both Duo and Hotaru yawned at the same time, they both decided that sleep would be a very good thing. Wishing each other a good night, both carefully avoided speaking about Djana and Mai. They'd deal with everything in the morning. Hopefully.

***

Duo couldn't sleep. Oh, he'd tried. As far as he could tell it was long past midnight, and he'd been attempting to sleep for hours. Not that his bed wasn't comfortable, no, it was the softest thing he'd ever lied on. And the room was quiet, with just the smallest sliver of light shining through the curtained window. The problem was every time he shut his eyes, even for an instant, the images that played across his closed lids… Djana running from the room… Mai's face when she died in Hotaru's arms… the look of absolute horror on Hotaru's face when they'd realized…

Sighing, he threw back the sheets and sat up. Obviously, sleep wasn't going to visit him, so he might as well get up. He stood, and debated changing out of the pajamas into some real clothes.

Now that was one thing he thought he'd figured out. The armoire was magic; whatever he needed, it would offer a selection of, all in his size. He'd played around with it for a while before he'd figured out the trick: All you had to do was think about what you need; work clothes, dress-uniforms, pajamas, and it would supply them. Duo had a bit of fun thinking up some of the most outrageous clothing, but finally decided to try to get some sleep, and after a moments hesitation he decided to indulge himself, slipping into a silk pair of black pjs.

Now he fiddled with the material, smoothing the front with chilled hands. Deciding he would change, he reached for the doors to the armoire but paused. A faint nose, growing louder, reached his ears. It sounded like…like…It sound's like screaming.

"Hotaru!"

He rushed out of his room and paused at her door. He could hear her, speaking now, unintelligible. He slowly creaked the door open, only to see her fighting a nightmare, kicking at her sheets as though they would strangle her in an instant. Now I'm glad I didn't fall asleep. I doubt it would have been peaceful…He sat on the edge of the bed, pulling the tangled covers from her and shaking her gently. A small piece of his mind smiled wryly; she'd fallen asleep in her clothes, the scarf draped over the headboard.

"Hotaru. Hotaru, wake up. It's just a dream, a nightmare…"

Her hands continued to push, now pushing him away weakly as she fought an unseen enemy. "Usagi-chan…..Hime! No, look out! Yamatte…..Yamatte!….No….NO! …..Haruka, it's Mistress Nine, she killed the princess. I killed the princess….No! Stop, please! Michiru-momma, Haruka-poppa, Setsuna-momma! Why? Please stop….I…Neptune! Pluto! Uranus!...Yamatte….Onegai…."* She continued on, in a strange mix of English and Japanese. Duo shook her harder, more forcefully, and her eyes flew open. "Duo? I…"

"You were having a nightmare, I just woke you up."

Hotaru blushed, wrapping her arms round her legs, drawing her knees close to her chest. "I'm sorry if I woke you…"

"I couldn't sleep anyway…Hotaru?"

She turned to see him staring at her purposefully. "Yes?"

"Who's Usagi?"

She jumped slightly, startled, but immediately regained her composure. "I don't know—"

He cut her off, pulling his feet onto the bed to face her, cross-legged. "You were speaking in your sleep. About Mistress Nine killing her, about you killing her. You called her 'princess' and kept switching back and forth from Japanese to English. You were begging someone, it sounded like you were talking to the planets, believe it or not. And you mentioned your parents, I think…" He reached out and grasped her hands, surprised to find they were as cold as his own. "Hotaru, you called Mai 'Usagi' and Tyra 'Mistress Nine', and when you tried to explain what happened to Djana, you said the fury made you believe Mistress Nine was back inside you again." He sighed. She still hadn't responded, so he pressed on. "Hotaru, I normally wouldn't care, and I definitely wouldn't ask, but I am getting the distinct feeling not knowing is hurting the both of us. Hotaru, what happened in that cave. What are you?"

Hotaru pulled her hands away from Duo and for a brief moment he worried she wouldn't answer, but she exhaled deeply and began, breaking the short silence between them. Staring past Duo, never moving her eyes to look at him she began to explain, from the very beginning. Her voice remained distant, impassive as she told him about her Senshi status, about the Silver Millennium, the other Senshi, the battle that tore the Moon Kingdom apart and her own terrible part in the destruction of that era. Her eyes got a distant, faraway look as she told him about her life as Hotaru, her first life. Her voice thickened, though she remained impassive as she told him of the fire that claimed her mother, the daemon that possessed her father, and the ever-evil entity known only as Mistress Nine that absorbed her very soul and almost killed everyone she cared about. She told him about the princess, their messiah, who risked her life to stop the destruction of Earth at Saturn's hands. She coolly explained her death inside the Tao system, trapped in the rift of time sealed by Sailor Pluto. She smiled slightly as she told him about her life raised as Uranus, Neptune and Pluto's daughter, rather, Haruka, Michiru, and Setsuna's daughter. She told him of the brief peace before her sprit, and memories, were returned to her, so that she could battle Neherinia. Her voice hardened to ice as she told Duo of Galaxia, the Sailor Senshi who had killed her family in a single blast, killing her with them. But that wasn't the end. She had been re-born, with the others, because the princess had returned Chaos to its rightful place. There had been peace then, and they had even hoped it would last, but Hotaru's differences once again separated her from those around her; she did better in school at first, but soon the memories of Saturn, of her past lives and deaths, everything began to tear her mind apart at the seams. Setsuna had helped her, showed her how to create walls in which to keep the memories at bay, until she transformed and needed the information her memories held. Soon her mind was under control, and Hotaru lived in real peace for the first time since the Silver Millennium. Now she was here, where her blocks seemed to fall at will. She was trapped, without her princess or any of the others. Worse yet, she was the cause of Mai's death. And even though Hotaru knew she wasn't Usagi….

"Duo, what if she had been? Usagi-chan is the princess, our lives are dedicated to protecting her, without the princess Neo-Tokyo will never come to pass. How can I expect to protect her when I couldn't protect Mai? That could have very well been Usagi killing herself to save me, I can't let that happen…"

Duo shook his head. So that's what all this boils down to. Guilt, but for the wrong reasons as much as the right ones. I can't let her do this to herself…"Hotaru, I want you to listen to me very carefully. No one is perfect. Well, maybe a very select people on any world.." He grinned wryly. "But we aren't perfect. We go out, fight with strong hearts and stronger beliefs, and do our best to succeed. Sometimes that means we live. Sometimes we die. We can win or lose, but the fact of the matter is we tried. We did our best. That girl was not Usagi. Mai wanted to die, you know that. Tyra was weighing on her mind, she wanted a release from it. You can't compare people because they look alike and expect them to act the same. Do you think your princess would be very happy to see you berating yourself like this?"

Hotaru shook her head, thinking of the many times Usagi did her best to make her smile. Even thinking about Usagi's clumsier moments brought a small curve to her lips- almost a smile but not quite.

"Hotaru, we both did our best. We can't shift the blame of Mai's death, but you can't blame yourself as though Usagi died. She's still out there, and she's waiting for you to come home. I'm willing to bet they all are."

This time Hotaru did smile, and Duo smiled back, glad he could reach her, even on this level. A comfortable stretch of silence followed them, until Duo thought of something. Several things, in fact. "You're Japanese right?"

Hotaru looked surprised. "Of course, I thought it would have been obvious."

Duo laughed. "Not really, you don't look it that much, and since you speak flawless English, even if it is a little formal…"

It was Hotaru's turn to laugh. "You spoke to me in English first, remember? Can I assume you speak Japanese?"

"Yep. Japanese, English, German, French, Arabic, Chinese, Italian and a handful of other dialects. What about you?"

"I speak every language I have come across, the same as Setsuna. It's because of our retained memories, we remember the languages we knew as princesses…"

"Wow, now that's handy………" There was a brief pause, but Duo decided to push on. "……..Goddess of Destruction, huh?"

Hotaru sighed. Why did he want to focus on that? "Yes."

"……I was, I mean I am, the Shinigami."

"God of Death?"

"Yep. You see, when I was small, I became convinced there was no God, just a God of Death…"

***

Duo replaced Hotaru's covers, wishing her a good night. The sad smile hadn't left her face. "I'm sorry for waking you, just the nightmares…."

Duo gave her a wry smile. "I told you I wasn't asleep, remember? Don't worry about it. And I know about nightmares;" He walked towards the door. "Sometimes they're worse than reality."

He paused to shut the door behind him, and heard Hotaru's murmured reply, though he doubted she knew he could hear her. "Sometimes reality is the nightmare."

He headed past his door, thinking about Hotaru's words, and his own. He had told her everything. He didn't mean to of course, it just happened. He'd guessed they were on even terms now, each knew the other's past, but that wasn't why he told her. As he walked down the hall the realization struck him: He wanted to share with someone, share the past, the pain. And when Hotaru had told him of her life, he needed to show her she wasn't all alone here, that he'd stay with her until she got home. That was his next mission, he decided to himself with a nod and a smile. Heero would probably approve. He had to ensure Hotaru got back, her world needed her. And he was going to do everything in his power to make sure it happened. Right now, he needed to see the Green Lady.

He had to find Djana.

* **

Duo was lost. He didn't mind it very much, it couldn't be helped. He simply lost track of the twists and turns he had taken, and was now completely clueless as to where he was. It didn't matter to him since he didn't know where he was going; Djana could be anywhere in the castle, if she had even returned. He was really just keeping his fingers crossed and depending on luck that she was in the castle and on one of the upper floors. He needed to speak to her, privately, and he had to do it before morning…

Turning yet another corner he found himself in a hallway of doors. Steeling himself, he approached and knocked: When no one answered he opened it a crack he found it empty, just like all the others he had tried so far. He tried the next door, then the next, each empty. The last door on the hall opened into a room that faced the inner courtyard, with very little on the wall across from the door. The wall had been all but completely removed to accommodate three huge windows with benches at their base. The windows looked into the courtyard and into the massive garden spread out below, glowing in the light of two moons. Standing in front of the largest window, glowing from the light that made its way into the room, stood Djana, veiled and in something that resembled a nightgown, with a long green housecoat covering her bare shoulders and arms for warmth. A breeze of wind made Duo shiver and he mentally cursed himself for not going back to his room to get dressed when he had the chance. But it was a bit too late now, Djana was studying him from behind her veil and Duo was feeling extremely insignificant. "I knocked, but no one answered. I'm sorry if I'm disturbing you…" He stepped forward, but left the door open behind him. He had to be careful, he didn't want to appear too presumptuous and end up upsetting Djana. Everything he had ever known, every instinct that he had learned to trust told him to leave now, don't bother her, this is the sorceress who turns people into trees, remember? She could kill you, do anything she wanted. This is her home, her world, her magic. And you just killed her daughter.

But it was another part of Duo that argued the fact, that this was what he had to do, that there was every possibility he killed more people than Djana ever had, that he was just as dangerous to her, perhaps not here, but at home? This was what he would do because this was what he had decided to do.

And this part of Duo won.

He stepped forward, close enough to see the raised eyebrow above the veil, but far enough so as not to be intruding or imposing. And far enough to dodge a physical attack, if she even uses those. Duo silenced his mind, ignoring the implications of what he was about to do, even as his stomach rolled.

He bowed low, and addressed the floor, calling on every single protocol lesson Relina had ever driven into his head, and thanking her for it the entire time. "I wish to speak with you."

She nodded, but realized he couldn't see her. "About what?"

"The Cost of Life, my Lady."

He was still talking to the floor, so he didn't notice her eyebrows rise, then come together with an almost audible click. "Stand up straight and come here. And stop the obsequies, I told you my name and expect you to use it. Please." Her voice had been harsher then intended, but Duo didn't blink.

He straightened from the bow and approached her, coming to a stop at arms length. Swallowing the lump that had formed in his throat, he clamped down again on his mind that was all but screaming for him to run. "The Cost of Life, Djana."

She pulled the housecoat tighter around her, reminding Duo exactly how cold he was, but he refused to shiver, or even move. Everything depended on him now; he couldn't afford the slightest of slip-ups. She stared at him for a long, cold moment, then spoke, words carefully neutral. "I don't know what you're talking about, and I don't think I'm going to like it, whatever you have planned."

Duo stopped himself from shaking his head in reply, cautiously choosing his words. "When I came to Orian I learned about the 'Cost of Life' from the centaurs. It applies to all of Orian, from what I have seen." He took a calming breath and continued, praying, for the first time in over ten years, that she would accept. "Because of me, your daughter is dead. I'm offering my life in exchange, so that Hotaru can go home. In the Cost of Life." His eyes dropped to the ground. He simply couldn't watch her as she decided. He hated to have to leave Hotaru like this, but he would do whatever was necessary to ensure she got back home. Her world needed her as Sailor Saturn. Back home, the only people he could be sure of missing him were Hilde and Quatre. Both of them could move on without him.

He heard her inhale sharply as he explained, and his heart sank to the floor as he heard her words. "When I learned of Mai….I didn't want your life. I still don't."

Duo's mind clamored. No! Not Hotaru! She can't, it's not her fault! I can't let her do this, I have to make her understand! His mind raced along, and he forgot protocol, forgot everything, as he struggled with the words to make her understand. She had to understand. "You can't have Hotaru, it wasn't her fault. I was the one who set us off on that trail, and I was the one who complained so we'd take a rest where the wall was weak. And I was too weak to fight against Tyra, Hotaru had to practically do everything on her own! I can't let you hurt Hotaru, she's been through too much already. If you want anyone's life, take mine. She's needed in her home, I'm nothing more than an annoyance to the people around me." He was staring directly into her veiled face, hoping she could see that he was telling the truth, while doing his best to not sound desperate. He was desperate however, as he searched to find a way to explain why…

"I can't let you hurt Hotaru, she's been affected by Mai too. As far as Hotaru is concerned she killed the one person in her life she had sworn to protect. She saw Mai as someone else, and when Mai died, so did her princess. Now her nightmares are haunting her. She thinks her family, her parents, are killing her for what she hasn't even done! She's terrified. I can't let you hurt her. I understand if you want to kill us, to punish us in some way, but I'm asking that you take my life instead of hers." Another calming breath. Djana still hadn't said anything, had hardly even moved, and Duo's fears began to mount. In reality, there was nothing to keep her from killing them both, right here and now. And as far as Duo could tell, on this world, it was her right. His speech slowed as he tried to put his feelings into words. "I'm offering myself. Whether you want to kill me or….I mean, I wouldn't refuse you if you…." He couldn't say the words out loud, no matter how hard he tried. He struggled to get his meaning across. "I mean, in the Cost of Life, my life would be yours, to kill, or……I know you want revenge for what we, what I did. I don't care what you do to me, and I'll never fight you, just don't hurt Hotaru. Please." His voice softened to a whisper and he once again looked to the floor, unable to face Djana any longer. "Please, don't hurt her."

Djana closed the distance between them, standing inches from Duo. Still staring at the ground, Duo saw that she wore strapped sandals that disappeared underneath her nightgown.

"Revenge?" Her voice was soft, questioning. Duo struggled to remain still and not recoil from her touch as she rested a hand on his shoulder. He remained a statue; eyes turned to the ground.

Inside however, his mind was reeling. One part of him could not believe what he was doing, but still he didn't move, even as her hand moved across his shoulder and up to cup his down-turned chin. Old wounds flared in pain, reminders of the 'revenge' he had suffered at the hands of OZ and its soldiers, each claiming revenge for lost friends, lost family, lost comrades. Long thin scars that crossed his back and shoulders blazed in remembered pain. He could still remember how he'd received the scars: He'd been captured by an irate OZ captain, who had no restraints to speak of, so he simply had Duo tied up with industrial wire. When Duo struggled against those who were claiming 'revenge' the wire had cut through his jacket and shirt and then cut through his back.

But none of that mattered now, he told his mind angrily. And he couldn't back out now; Hotaru's life hung in the balance. He would not let her down.

"Revenge…" Djana's voice was soft and low. The hand that cupped Duo's chin pulled his face upwards, to look into her face. She stroked his cheek with her thumb as her other hand came to rest on Duo's shoulder. "You would give yourself, subject yourself to this, for your friend?"

Duo's tongue seemed too thick and heavy for his mouth, but he managed an answer. "Yes." He waited for her movement, her hands to start, for her to lead him somewhere else, but she stayed as she was, one hand on his shoulder, one under his chin, thumb stroking his cheek.

They stayed like this for what seemed like eternity, when Djana finally pulled away. To Duo's confusion, she did not advance, but rather turned to face out the window, staring at the false dawn. "B-But….I….I'm offering so you won't hurt her….So you'll…"

Djana never turned, instead she addressed the small bird that had landed on her finger, looking for food. Crumbs materialized on her outstretched hand in a flash of green light. "When I said I didn't want your life I meant it. I don't want Hotaru's either. The only person I wanted to kill was myself. That's why I was here. I was debating throwing myself from this window, just to end it all." Duo stared in mute amazement as she sat on the bench. She turned sideways, half looking out the window, half facing Duo. Her hand reached up to her face, and with one, deliberate movement she removed her veil. If Duo hadn't been frozen to the floor, he would have stepped back in shock. The scar he had originally seen peeking out of her veil continued up the side of her cheek, stopping just before her left eyebrow. But that wasn't the only scar. They were littered across her face, like someone had taken a claw to her eyes. And he guessed that it was very likely someone had; scars crossed both her eyes, never passing her cheekbones. And her eyes were nothing more than milky white pools of scar tissue.

Djana was blind.

She grimaced and turned away from Duo, the moonlight on her face creating pockets of shadow that hid her scars from his sight. "Not very nice to look at, is it? But I wasn't always like this." She breathed deeply and exhaled, as though she could blow away all her problems with that single breath if she held it long enough. But she couldn't.

"I was born on Darana, in the city of Circe. That's where I grew up. I was a bit of an outsider, with my green hair and golden eyes, but people nevertheless accepted me. Until my tenth birthday, when it was discovered I had magic, and could use it. So I was cast out, by my city, my friends, and my parents. I was left to fend for myself inside the Forbidden Forest and that was that. They expected me to die." A wry smile crossed her lips. "Unfortunately, I survived. I met up with the Lady of the Forest, the source of many of our tales and legends. She was a witch who would do anything for you, for a price. Everyone feared her. She found me, half-dead, and took me in. She taught me all she knew, then helped me learn even more. We created spells, bartered with the others who lived in the forest, and occasionally preformed the odd spell for the few travelers who made it to our small home. Our main price was whatever sat in the traveler's backyard, barn or field. They always agreed and went home with their spell or potion, and would tell their husband or wife of the wonderful deal he or she had made. The wonderful spell that would ease all their troubles, and all it cost him was the apple tree in the back, or the old cow in the barn. Then their partner would tearfully tell them that their only child had been spending the day in that same field or barn doing chores. In essence, they had promised their child to us. So they would wait for one of us to show up in the dead of night to claim their child as our payment, and of course they'd beg for us to take them instead, but we'd always refuse and stand there smiling. So they'd wrap their little one in a shroud and giver him or her to us, and we'd always look shocked and ask what was this? We'd agreed to exchange the spell for that apple tree or old cow, not your child. And they'd stand there, scared stiff, and we'd simply walk out, take our payment, and leave them there in amazement." She smiled into the moonlight. "We loved doing that, I suppose it was rather evil, I know it didn't help people's opinion of us, but we really enjoyed doing it, so we never worried about the consequences."

"My teacher died when I was fifteen, and I decided I wouldn't take up her place as the Lady of the Forest. I didn't want the title, or any other. So I left, began to travel across my world, never staying in one place for very long. It was here I met Stryke. He'd been captured by some hunters who were auctioning him off to the highest bidder. On a gut feeling I bought him, then patched him up. When he was feeling better I let him loose, telling him to be careful of hunter's traps, he looked at me, then said 'thank you'. I didn't even know he could talk until that moment. He decided to stick around, and I told anyone who asked that he was my familiar, so the fact of him speaking didn't seem too odd. I picked up an apprentice, a girl from the assassins guild named Jade. I'd hoped that by showing her magic, she'd leave her guild, but I never got the chance. She opened a portal into the worlds of the Diadem. We ended up on Orian, Jade dead from the passage, in the middle of a centaur camp. They almost killed us there, but I got us out."

"We were lost on a world that had dedicated itself to killing humans, for good reason. I tried, but I couldn't create a back-portal. I buried Jade, then me and Stryke tried to find a way off this world, but before we could I was captured by the wizard Anrak." Djana shivered and pulled her knees to her chest, hugging herself for warmth as she remembered. "He stuck Stryke in some sort of spell that made him defenseless and he grabbed me, teleporting the three of us to his castle. Anrak used some sort of spell to create bracelets around my wrists that would burn if I left the castle. He wanted an heir you see, and when I appeared…he was insane……I ended up pregnant with twins, both girls. He went ballistic. He wanted a male heir, not a girl. So he began to experiment, to try to kill one of the girls off and to change the other into a boy. I tolerated as much as I could, but one day he turned his back for a moment, and I found the strength to grab the knife on the table and kill him."

"I freed Stryke and we ran from the castle. The bracelets melted off…" Her grim smile had returned and she lifted her long sleeve of her housecoat to show a ring of pink, shiny, puckered skin around each wrist. "Another wizard named Shananara took us in. She helped me a lot, trying to reverse what Anrak had done, tried to do something…But it was too late. Anrak's spells had already taken effect. When I finally came to term, I had one child, not two. Anrak had managed to meld the two into one child, but she seemed perfectly healthy, so I named her Mai, and Shananara and I raised her…. By the time she turned three, however, what Anrak had done was becoming apparent. He had separated their personalities, and somehow created two people inside Mai. One was the blond, 'good' Mai, but the other, the other was evil, and hatred, and everything Mai wasn't…. We'd hoped that by keeping her in a caring environment the other personality wouldn't show up in Mai, but the older she became, the more we saw of the black-haired other, and she was becoming more and more violent…. A week after Mai's thirteenth birthday party, she attacked us when we slept. She killed Shananara, then attacked me." Djana ran her fingers over the scars, avoiding her eyes. "I couldn't harm her, but when she did this, I knew I couldn't allow her to continue on in this way. She was a threat to everyone…. I exist outside the timestream of this world, and can manipulate pockets of time because of it. I trapped Mai in one of these pockets, and placed her inside a cave that none knew about save me…. I buried Shananara beside Jade and swore to prevent Mai from harming anyone else…. When a wizard appeared a few weeks later hoping to kill a centaur so that he could open another portal, I turned him into a tree and placed him by the cave, to ward off travelers. Eventually I had spelled the entire area so that no one could approach it but me. I even shifted it's location in such a way that you could only reach it by travelling a spelled path, but I never considered the cave wall falling in…" Djana stood, turning to face out the window once again, though Duo knew now she couldn't see the view.

"In the laws of Diadem a mother cannot kill her child, and the child cannot kill her mother. One may harm or wound the other, but it was impossible for either of us to end the other's life…I do not blame you for her death. That is why I did not want your life in exchange. I blame myself…Mai had wished to die for some time now, and you have fulfilled her wish. I am only sorry that had to be this way, at such a cost….."

Duo wanted to stand, to do something, but he was at a loss. He shivered from the cold- silk was not a very good insulator- then blinked in surprise when a blanket appeared around his shoulders, Djana smiling. "I'd forgotten how cold this old castle gets at night." She pulled her housecoat closer around herself.

"I don't want to pry, but how…?"

"How can I see?"

Duo nodded, then voiced his reply with a cautious grin. "Yes."

"It's a combination of things, believe it or not. I can see through Stryke's eyes when he is in the room, and that's normally what I do, but at times like this…well…This castle is attuned to its owner, so I can sense where rooms and walls are. And I'm slightly empathic, so I can 'see' the auras of the people in the room. I'm blind yes, but I'm not helpless." Her smile broadened as Duo yawned then apologized.

"Don't worry about it. When was the last time you slept well?"

It was Duo's turn to smile. "Well, we spent the last week and a half in a dozen forests and trails, so I think it's safe to say, oh…about ten days ago, when we spent the night in a centaur camp."

"Well I can't send you back exhausted. This is something we'll have to fix…"

Duo felt a small prick on the side of his neck as Djana came to stand next to him. He struggled to speak as he felt his eyes begin to slowly fall. "I can't sleep….. go home….Hotaru too…can't leave…." His mouth stopped working and the last thing he felt was the extremely strange sensation (at least to him) of being lifted and carried.

"Just sleep, Duo. Home will still be there when you wake up. You've given me a lot to think about, whether you realize it or not……"

************************************************************

Whew! And before you say anything, this was ten pages long and I had to end it. I know it's a bit of a cliffie still, but it could have been a lot worse, and a lot sooner.

I know it took a while for his one to get out, but there were a lot of factors.

I had an essay to write, and HOMEWORK STINKS!!!!!!!! This was not in any way easy. For a lot of it I could only write a paragraph or two then stop, especially for the first part of the scene between Djana and Duo. That scene effected me more than I think it will you, but if you liked/hated it I NEED TO KNOW! TELL ME!!!!!! Ahem. This was one of those chapters I kept tweaking to get right, then gave it to my greatest beta-reader (and luckily best friend) Shinigami_Myao! I posted it after she was done with it, my chapters are always better when she proof-reads. (Thanks Jen!!!)

I think I'm done ranting, now for the important notes.

I (as far as I can tell) have one more chapter to write, then the epilouge. (I don't know if this is a good thing or not yet…J There is references to Duo being raped when captured, mainly because that's something that happens in prison, it's widely accepted in the fanfic community (though it is way too popular for NC-17's) and because it works well in the plot. (I'm a slave to plot devices, so sue me! J It takes a LOT to get Hotaru to open up, which is why Duo is learning about the senshi only now. There's a reason for everything, and one look at her background tells you hers… Oh, a LOT of backstory in this one. I did my best to shorten it, but there are just some things you can't leave out. Did my best though, sorry if its too run-on. I figure Duo was smart enough to pick up the languages floating around in his colony, and the languages his fellow pilots use. He isn't dumb. So that's why he can speak a slew of languages. Hotaru's dream speech translation: Yamatte- (Begging) stop Onegai= (Begging) Please. I use portions of the manga and the anime for Hotaru's backstory. Mainly because I know most, but not all, of both. In the manga, Galaxia kills the outers, and Uranus and Neptune never kill Saturn and Pluto. (I REALLY hate that part… L ) Duo figures no one but Quatre and Hilde would miss him if he was gone because he figures the other pilots are too emotionless to care. Hilde is a close friend, and Quatre is…well, Quatre. Of course they're going to miss him….

THAT'S ALL FOLKS!!!!!

Ah, now you know, about Djana and Mai, and even a little on Stryke. So give me a heads up and REVIEW!

And to GlaiveGirl: They are a damn cute couple, I just can't write that. Maybe some day, but not this time.

Exams are coming up so no promises for the next chapter. I'll do my best!

R&R!

All I want is a kind word, a warm bed and unlimited power…

I am the Breeze of Wisdom, I am the Wind of Insanity.

~The Elemental