Disclaimer: I do not own any of the characters mentioned below. I simply "borrowed" the names and pinky swore to put them back when I was finished. I thought it better than renaming them myself (imagine Stuffy, Trike, Pawn, Dryly etc... see my point?). If I did own, say...Spike, well, let's just say I would be too busy to write my name much less fanfic ;-)

There is B/S shippage in here, but only the kind you would expect at this point in their relationship. No Hallmark, Godiva Chocolates and spouting of bloody awful poetry in this one.

Choices - Part 1

Chapter 1 - Anniversary

"Dawn!", Buffy yelled up the stairs. "Dawn, hurry up, you're going to be late for school!"

"I'm coming!", Dawn yelled from the bathroom. She sighed as she took one last look in the mirror. Great. Red eyes. Eyes of fuchia. Damn! She sighed. How am I going to make it through the day. If only mom were here...

"DAWN!", Buffy yelled loudly.

Dawn came flying down the stairs. "I heard you the first 15 times, you know...", she said softly avoiding eyes contact with her sister.

Buffy sighed. She thinks I don't remember. She thinks I have forgotten. "Dawn," she faltered, "I know this is a hard day for you. It's hard for me too." She reached out and stroked Dawns hair. "I miss her, too."

Dawn looked up at her sister with tears in her eyes. "One year...", she whispered, "365 days."

Buffy grabbed her and held her sister as she cried, "I know, Dawn, I know..." Oh, God. she thought. If only you knew...

"I am going after school today. Will you come with?", Dawn asked brushing away her tears.

Buffy turned away and winced in pain. "I am sorry Dawn, but I can't make it. I have this other thing I have to do." This other thing? Damn! She cursed herself. Geez Buffy, uncaring much?

Dawn lowered her eyes and frowned at the floor. "You know..", she began, "It has been a long time since you visited her..."

Buffy swallowed hard and closed her eyes. A long time... If only she knew about time...my time.

Dawn turned and walked out the door. Buffy could feel her pain. She could feel it but felt powerless to respond to it. Not now. She choked back tears. I just can't do this right now.