Chapter 10 - I Know What You Did Last Night...

"Damn!", Buffy cursed herself as she ran up to her house. She paused at the door. What was she going to say to Dawn?

She sighed and opened the door. "Dawn!", she yelled as she walked into the house and closed the door, "Dawn, come on, you're going to be late for school."

"She's not here, Buffy."

Buffy spun around and saw Xander sitting on the couch.

"She's at school. I dropped her off."

"Xander...",Buffy looked down. "What are you doing here?"

"I think the real question here, Buffy, is what you were doing NOT here?", Xander stood up and stared at Buffy.

Buffy swallowed and looked down, "I...I...I was..."

"Don't say it, Buffy." Xander warned as he stepped toward Buffy.

She looked into his eyes and saw anger. She looked away and sat down on the couch.

"Do you have any idea how upset Dawn was?" he began, "She has been through hell the last year. She really needed you last night, Buffy."

"I know," Buffy said quietly. Damn Spike...

"And you were... where?" Xander asked pointedly. "Not here...Not patrolling." He lifted Buffy's chin so that her eyes met his, "Why don't you cut the crap and tell me where you were?"

She jerked her head away.

Xander knew the answer to his question. He could tell by the shame in her eyes. Anya was right. She was with Spike. He really hoped Anya was wrong. Not another vampire...Angel was bad enough, but Spike...well that was downright insane. No soul, No conscience, drinks blood, vicious killer... He groaned and sat down next to Buffy.

He tried to choose his words wisely. Buffy just doesn't react well to angry confrontations... "Look...Buffy..." he turned to her. "I know this hasn't been easy for you..."

"Easy?!" She jumped up,"You *know*?!" her eyes were blazing with fury. He knew...what did he know..."You know *what*, Xander? You know where I've been? What I felt? How I got back here? Tell me, now, what *do* you know?"

Xander jumped to his feet, "I know that your sister, who you went to your death trying to protect .." his eyes met hers, "is suffering. She's all alone. She doesn't even have you. Because you are out rolling around with Sp-"

"Spike." she spat. "Now this is about Spike?"

"No. Buffy. This isn't about Spike. This about you. And your responsibilities to your little sister." Xander spat back.

"Oh. And looky here." Buffy narrowed her eyes "We have a boy, I'm sorry, your a man now, right. My bad....A man who has *always* been soooo responsible... telling me what I am doing wrong. is planning to spend the rest of his days with a former vengeance demon..."

"Buffy..." Xander warned as she continued to circle him

"So, what kind of a trip down memory lane will you two be having? And you are throwing stones at Spike..."

"Buffy. This is about you, not Spike..." Xander began.

"Oh really? 'cause I'm thinking this is all about Spike... and Angel..." She began.

"Don't go there, Buffy..."Xander grabbed her arm.

"Oh, look at who's the big and bad..." she laughed, "couldn't tumble with me one way...so..."

Xander dropped her arm and stormed out of the house.

Buffy shuddered as she heard the door slam. Then she felt the tears streaming down her face. Oh God...Xander...

She sank onto the couch and began sobbing. Her life was a horrible, rotten mess. She thought of her mother. How much she missed her. How much she would be heartbroken by Dawn's suffering. By all of her mistakes. She promised her mother that she would always protect Dawn. And she had failed. Again.