Disclaimer: I am in no way affiliated with the television show Higher
Ground. It is own by FFC. (Or at least it was before it was cancelled. I
don't really know who owns it now.) I do however own Chase.
Author's Note: Sorry it's been awhile.as usual. The holidays have been extremely busy. I hope this chapter is a little longer (I tried) but I'm not sure.Please R&R!!!!!!!
Note to Fay: No, this isn't turning into a D&E fic. I wanted to include the other Cliffhangers a little more, and the D&E storyline needed to be developed now, rather than later. Thanks for your review, and for your opinion. It was very helpful. Don't worry, there WILL be more S&S!!!
1 Chapter 12
Dinner was eaten in silence. The Cliffhangers were each lost in their own thoughts. Shelby picked at her half-eaten food, well aware of the minimal distance between her and Chase, who was sitting next to her. She glanced at her group mates, who all seemed to be distracted by other things. Had they all forgiven Chase? Shelby wondered. Was it just her that felt uncomfortable?
Unable to stand the uneasiness in the pit of her stomach, Shelby got up and threw out the rest of her food. She needed time alone. Stopping by the Cliffhanger girls' cabin to get her journal, Shelby headed towards the docks. They were the only place that seemed to offer comfort. Sitting down on the edge of the wooden structure, the blonde stared into the water before beginning to write. Finally she picked up her pen.
Dear journal,
It seems like it's been so long since I last wrote in here, but it has only been a few days. Things at Horizon have changed. No one else seems to notice, but it's the little subtle things that are different. The things you take for granted; and only miss once they're gone.
At first I didn't know what was missing. I mean, it seems like everything is the same, right? But it's not. Scott still loves and understands me, and I still have Daisy. And I'm not at home.if it can even be called that. But the safety is gone. Horizon, the place, the people, everything here used to make me feel so safe, but now.that's all gone.
Chase has replaced that safety with a feeling I thought only Walt could cause. Fear. Everyone else seems to have forgiven him. They don't try to protect me anymore, and it's like they're too busy with their own problems to care anymore. But I guess it's my fault. Before, I never needed anyone. I was independent, and I hated anyone who tried to help me. Anyone who thought I was weak enough to need their help. Maybe when I asked them to forgive Chase, because I needed them to, they thought that maybe I'd already done so myself. But they were wrong. I'm so lost, so scared, so angry. Every remotely happy thought is interrupted by his presence. Maybe this is my punishment for what happened. I let everything get this far, didn't I?
I guess I deserve this then. I'll bury it inside me, and try to forget. I can't tell anyone. No, then the guilt and fear will come out. It has to stay inside, or at least for now.
More later,
1.1 Shelby
Shelby closed her journal and lay on her back, gazing up at the darkening sky. There was a thick silence around her, the only sounds were those of the crickets, chirping quietly in the distance.
Closing her eyes, Shelby let the tears that were burning behind her eyelids slide down her cheeks. She bit her lip, trying desperately to hold back the sobs that were threatening to wrench through her body. Shelby shivered, the cold night air passing around her body. Would she ever have the courage to tell someone about the fear that was slowly taking over her body and mind?
Shelby went to bed early, angry that no one had come to see if she was ok. Yet sleep was hard to come across these days, and she spent the night tossing and turning, hoping for morning to come.
* * * * *
The next morning the Cliffhangers sat in the lodge, staring at Peter in disbelief.
"Another newbie?" Scott asked. "That's like, what, the second in a week?"
"Her name is Leigh Pemberton. She should be here in about half an hour." Peter announced, ignoring Scott's question.
"Can't you send her to another group?" Daisy asked. She wasn't ready for another Cliffhanger. It meant more secrets, more anger. No one was really sure how to handle newbies anymore.
"No, Daisy. She will be in your group." Peter paused to let the reality sink in. He hated to see the Cliffhangers like this, but he wanted to put Leigh in their group. Her files had similarities to some of the other Cliffhangers, and he knew that they could help her with her problems.
The Cliffhangers groaned, knowing that they no longer had a say in the matter. Peter had made up his mind.
* * * * *
As the cliffhangers waited in the lodge, Shelby wandered away to sit by the fire. Although she wouldn't admit it, she was happy to have a newbie in their group. Maybe then she would be able to get her mind off of Chase.
Shelby felt someone slip an arm around her shoulders, and without looking up, she knew who it was.
"What do you want, Scott?" she asked quietly.
"You looked lonely." He replied, completely aware of the ice in her voice.
"This is so convenient for you, isn't it?"
"What do you mean?"
"You're only around when you want to be. When you feel like dealing with me."
"Come on, Shelby, you know that's not true. And I don't have to 'deal with you', I like being with you."
"Ok, then what about yesterday?"
"What *about* yesterday?" Scott asked, his brow furrowed in confusion.
"After dinner, when I walked out and went to bed early. You weren't concerned then?"
"I figured you were tired. The hike was long, I thought you wanted to get some rest." Scott replied honestly.
"Whatever you say, Scott." Shelby replied, getting up and walking towards the door of the lodge.
Juliette watched the conversation taking place from her seat on the couch. She put down her book and followed Shelby to the door, stopping her in the doorway.
"Where are you going?" The brunette asked.
"To outer space." Shelby replied with harsh sarcasm.
"Why are you always like that?" Juliette asked in a hushed tone. Although she knew Shelby was only mean as a way of shielding her feelings, the blonde's comments still cut deep.
"Always like what?" Shelby asked impatiently.
"Angry."
"I have no reason to be happy." Shelby responded softly. Juliette had to strain to hear words, and once she had, Shelby was already out the door.
* * * * *
Daisy sat down next to her sullen friend on the wooden picnic table. The dried out, crusty brown paint was starting to peel off, and Shelby picked at it with her fingernails.
"Why does my life suck?" Shelby asked suddenly, her voice back to its normal volume.
"Why does the bumblebee fly?" Daisy asked another rhetorical question in return. Shelby could sense a wisdom speech coming on, and she sat back a little to listen. "They say that scientifically the bee shouldn't be able to fly because its body is too big for the size of wings it has."
"Is there going to be a point to this?" Shelby asked sarcastically, her tone lightening a little.
"But it flies anyways, right?" Daisy paused to let Shelby nod her head hesitantly. "See, that just proves my point."
"Which is?" Shelby pushed. Where was this going?
"Just because statistics, science, or even other people say that something should be a certain way, or wouldn't work because of it's appearance, doesn't mean they're right. Maybe you've had some bad turns, some horrifying, atrocious experiences, but they don't have to affect the way you live your life. You have people who love you, and you're on the way to recovery. You're going to get out of this place, and you're going to have a great life." Daisy encouraged her friend, in hopes of helping her feel at least a little more self-confident. A little more loved.
"It's the getting out of this place thing that I'm not too sure about." Shelby replied.
"You're scared of going back out into the dark evil world." Daisy stated. Shelby shook her head.
"I'm scared that I won't make it out." Shelby's response sent a cold shiver up Daisy's spine. How could she have not noticed her friend's pain? Daisy wondered to herself. She looked into her friend's eyes, and suddenly she knew. Everything, all the evidence, had been right under her nose the whole time and she hadn't noticed.
"Because of Chase." Daisy stated accurately. "He makes you feel vulnerable, scared."
"Dais, he saw me at my weakest. When I had no one, and nothing to hold onto.and then he just made it worse." A single tear fell from Shelby's eye.
Daisy hugged her friend tightly as they sat in silence. Shelby clung to her friend, frantically, her eyes closed. All she could do was hope.
Coming soon: The newbie arrives.what affect will she have on the Cliffhangers
Author's Note: Sorry it's been awhile.as usual. The holidays have been extremely busy. I hope this chapter is a little longer (I tried) but I'm not sure.Please R&R!!!!!!!
Note to Fay: No, this isn't turning into a D&E fic. I wanted to include the other Cliffhangers a little more, and the D&E storyline needed to be developed now, rather than later. Thanks for your review, and for your opinion. It was very helpful. Don't worry, there WILL be more S&S!!!
1 Chapter 12
Dinner was eaten in silence. The Cliffhangers were each lost in their own thoughts. Shelby picked at her half-eaten food, well aware of the minimal distance between her and Chase, who was sitting next to her. She glanced at her group mates, who all seemed to be distracted by other things. Had they all forgiven Chase? Shelby wondered. Was it just her that felt uncomfortable?
Unable to stand the uneasiness in the pit of her stomach, Shelby got up and threw out the rest of her food. She needed time alone. Stopping by the Cliffhanger girls' cabin to get her journal, Shelby headed towards the docks. They were the only place that seemed to offer comfort. Sitting down on the edge of the wooden structure, the blonde stared into the water before beginning to write. Finally she picked up her pen.
Dear journal,
It seems like it's been so long since I last wrote in here, but it has only been a few days. Things at Horizon have changed. No one else seems to notice, but it's the little subtle things that are different. The things you take for granted; and only miss once they're gone.
At first I didn't know what was missing. I mean, it seems like everything is the same, right? But it's not. Scott still loves and understands me, and I still have Daisy. And I'm not at home.if it can even be called that. But the safety is gone. Horizon, the place, the people, everything here used to make me feel so safe, but now.that's all gone.
Chase has replaced that safety with a feeling I thought only Walt could cause. Fear. Everyone else seems to have forgiven him. They don't try to protect me anymore, and it's like they're too busy with their own problems to care anymore. But I guess it's my fault. Before, I never needed anyone. I was independent, and I hated anyone who tried to help me. Anyone who thought I was weak enough to need their help. Maybe when I asked them to forgive Chase, because I needed them to, they thought that maybe I'd already done so myself. But they were wrong. I'm so lost, so scared, so angry. Every remotely happy thought is interrupted by his presence. Maybe this is my punishment for what happened. I let everything get this far, didn't I?
I guess I deserve this then. I'll bury it inside me, and try to forget. I can't tell anyone. No, then the guilt and fear will come out. It has to stay inside, or at least for now.
More later,
1.1 Shelby
Shelby closed her journal and lay on her back, gazing up at the darkening sky. There was a thick silence around her, the only sounds were those of the crickets, chirping quietly in the distance.
Closing her eyes, Shelby let the tears that were burning behind her eyelids slide down her cheeks. She bit her lip, trying desperately to hold back the sobs that were threatening to wrench through her body. Shelby shivered, the cold night air passing around her body. Would she ever have the courage to tell someone about the fear that was slowly taking over her body and mind?
Shelby went to bed early, angry that no one had come to see if she was ok. Yet sleep was hard to come across these days, and she spent the night tossing and turning, hoping for morning to come.
* * * * *
The next morning the Cliffhangers sat in the lodge, staring at Peter in disbelief.
"Another newbie?" Scott asked. "That's like, what, the second in a week?"
"Her name is Leigh Pemberton. She should be here in about half an hour." Peter announced, ignoring Scott's question.
"Can't you send her to another group?" Daisy asked. She wasn't ready for another Cliffhanger. It meant more secrets, more anger. No one was really sure how to handle newbies anymore.
"No, Daisy. She will be in your group." Peter paused to let the reality sink in. He hated to see the Cliffhangers like this, but he wanted to put Leigh in their group. Her files had similarities to some of the other Cliffhangers, and he knew that they could help her with her problems.
The Cliffhangers groaned, knowing that they no longer had a say in the matter. Peter had made up his mind.
* * * * *
As the cliffhangers waited in the lodge, Shelby wandered away to sit by the fire. Although she wouldn't admit it, she was happy to have a newbie in their group. Maybe then she would be able to get her mind off of Chase.
Shelby felt someone slip an arm around her shoulders, and without looking up, she knew who it was.
"What do you want, Scott?" she asked quietly.
"You looked lonely." He replied, completely aware of the ice in her voice.
"This is so convenient for you, isn't it?"
"What do you mean?"
"You're only around when you want to be. When you feel like dealing with me."
"Come on, Shelby, you know that's not true. And I don't have to 'deal with you', I like being with you."
"Ok, then what about yesterday?"
"What *about* yesterday?" Scott asked, his brow furrowed in confusion.
"After dinner, when I walked out and went to bed early. You weren't concerned then?"
"I figured you were tired. The hike was long, I thought you wanted to get some rest." Scott replied honestly.
"Whatever you say, Scott." Shelby replied, getting up and walking towards the door of the lodge.
Juliette watched the conversation taking place from her seat on the couch. She put down her book and followed Shelby to the door, stopping her in the doorway.
"Where are you going?" The brunette asked.
"To outer space." Shelby replied with harsh sarcasm.
"Why are you always like that?" Juliette asked in a hushed tone. Although she knew Shelby was only mean as a way of shielding her feelings, the blonde's comments still cut deep.
"Always like what?" Shelby asked impatiently.
"Angry."
"I have no reason to be happy." Shelby responded softly. Juliette had to strain to hear words, and once she had, Shelby was already out the door.
* * * * *
Daisy sat down next to her sullen friend on the wooden picnic table. The dried out, crusty brown paint was starting to peel off, and Shelby picked at it with her fingernails.
"Why does my life suck?" Shelby asked suddenly, her voice back to its normal volume.
"Why does the bumblebee fly?" Daisy asked another rhetorical question in return. Shelby could sense a wisdom speech coming on, and she sat back a little to listen. "They say that scientifically the bee shouldn't be able to fly because its body is too big for the size of wings it has."
"Is there going to be a point to this?" Shelby asked sarcastically, her tone lightening a little.
"But it flies anyways, right?" Daisy paused to let Shelby nod her head hesitantly. "See, that just proves my point."
"Which is?" Shelby pushed. Where was this going?
"Just because statistics, science, or even other people say that something should be a certain way, or wouldn't work because of it's appearance, doesn't mean they're right. Maybe you've had some bad turns, some horrifying, atrocious experiences, but they don't have to affect the way you live your life. You have people who love you, and you're on the way to recovery. You're going to get out of this place, and you're going to have a great life." Daisy encouraged her friend, in hopes of helping her feel at least a little more self-confident. A little more loved.
"It's the getting out of this place thing that I'm not too sure about." Shelby replied.
"You're scared of going back out into the dark evil world." Daisy stated. Shelby shook her head.
"I'm scared that I won't make it out." Shelby's response sent a cold shiver up Daisy's spine. How could she have not noticed her friend's pain? Daisy wondered to herself. She looked into her friend's eyes, and suddenly she knew. Everything, all the evidence, had been right under her nose the whole time and she hadn't noticed.
"Because of Chase." Daisy stated accurately. "He makes you feel vulnerable, scared."
"Dais, he saw me at my weakest. When I had no one, and nothing to hold onto.and then he just made it worse." A single tear fell from Shelby's eye.
Daisy hugged her friend tightly as they sat in silence. Shelby clung to her friend, frantically, her eyes closed. All she could do was hope.
Coming soon: The newbie arrives.what affect will she have on the Cliffhangers