Dying Love

When did my feelings of love slowly turn into sadness? When did feelings of devotion turn into despair? It had started awhile back when I noticed you would cringe away every time I would try and touch you.

"Hey Heero come and give me a hug."

"No baka I don't want to hug you right now."

At first I thought I was being paranoid but when it happened a few more times I just knew that it was true. You would stare at me with those lovely Prussian eyes of yours and all I would see was coldness.

Perhaps I had let myself truly believe that you loved me and built a fantasy world around us. And just didn't really wake up until now. I started to think back on all our times together and I realized not once had you said that you loved me.

"Hey Heero ya know I love you right?"

"Hn. Baka I know."

I had told you just about everyday and all that you would never say it back. Maybe you were never capable of ever loving or even caring for someone.

A few times I had threatened to leave but you just gave me one of theses looks. You would glare at me and then a smirk would form on your lips.

"Heero I am leaving you today and I won't be coming back."

"There's the door Duo."

You would always say something cruel to me and I was about to leave but for some reason I couldn't. I would grab all my stuff and walk a few blocks away only to come back to you.

The final straw was when you said Relena's name in your sleep and I couldn't take it anymore. At first I thought you were just saying it at random in your sleep but when it accrued again and again I began to wonder if you were cheating on me. Every time we would go into work at Preventer Headquarters people would give me pitying glances or not look me in the eye. After that I just knew you had been cheating on me and I couldn't take it anymore.

That night I asked you outright if you were cheating and you didn't say a word. Somehow I just knew you wouldn't defend yourself and that was typically you. I felt my heart shatter and the tears poured down from my eyes. Turning around I raced out the door and into the night. I did not return back to our home instead I stayed out all night on the streets. A part of me hoped that you would come after me but I just knew that you never would.

In the morning I withdrew all my money from my accounts and disappeared to another colony. I made sure to wipe all traces of were I went and assumed a false identity in order to stay hidden.

Someday's are harder then the next when you survive a broken heart and I always wonder will I ever heal from this. Letting out a tired sigh I look out the window and slowly mouth your name.

Heero.

Hmm well do you like my depressing fic? Not to sure if it makes sense or why I wrote it hehe. Oh well review please.