[Disclaimer—I do not own DBZ and ham, I do not own them, Sam I am. (I don't
own anything by Dr. Seuss either!)
{A/N}-In response to Asiolek, no I don't have the chapters written already, although I do have a general idea of what I'm going to write usually =) I just write fast! Also, all of the reviews help too—every time I see I have reviews I squeal and jump around *hehe*and it just makes me want to write another chapter!]
_____________________
Last Time:
Vegeta & Bulma:
Striding through door, Vegeta grabbed the first person in a white lab coat that walked by. Bringing the squeaking white-faced human up to eye level, Vegeta demanded, "The woman is having a child. Provide assistance immediately!"
Goku:
"That's what I'm calling about Kakkarott. You are going to be a father again," Vegeta spat with a growl in his voice, "so you had better get to the hospital immediately." Vegeta slammed down the phone.
Goku scratched his head. He was going to be a father again? What was Vegeta talking about?
Chi-Chi looked up in annoyance as Goku entered the room. "No, Goku, dinner's not ready yet," Chi-Chi began to say when Goku rushed up and swung her into his arms.
"Chi-Chi, why didn't you TELL me," Goku exclaimed in panic, flying through the roof, and towards the hospital, the startled Chi-Chi cradled in his arms.
_____________________
As Vegeta stood, arms crossed in the waiting area of the emergency room, a faint bonging sound made him look up. It was an interesting sight to say the least.
In through the emergency entrance, staggered a cringing, sopping wet Goku, holding onto a screaming demon from hell, bashing him repeatedly over the head with a frying pan. Oh wait, that was Chi-Chi!
BONG
BONG
BONG
Goku, relatively oblivious to the beating he was being given, rushed up to the check-in desk. "Hi, I'm Son Goku, and this is my wife Chi-Chi, she's having a baby!" Goku told the nurse at the desk. The startled nurse didn't even get a chance to respond.
"GOOOOKUUUU! I'm not having a baby NOW! And how the HELL did you know I was pregnant anyway," screeched Chi-Chi from his arms.
"You're not?" Goku scratched his head, "but Vegeta told me…."
Chi-Chi's eyes narrowed and swung around the room to find Vegeta leaning against the back wall.
Jumping down from Goku's arms, Chi-Chi stomped, shoes squelching up to the Prince who tried to maintain his bored façade. This was really funny.
BONG
That was not. "What the hell do you think you're doing you crazy bitch," Vegeta yelled, staring down at the dark-haired woman wielding her frying pan.
"Why the hell did you tell Goku I'm pregnant, and how the hell did you know anyway?! I didn't find out myself until yesterday!"
Vegeta snorted, "I didn't tell him anything of the sort woman."
Goku walked over, confused look on his face, "But Vegeta…."
"Can it Kakkarott. I said you were going to be a father again. But not by THIS woman. Surely you know who I'm talking about?"
Goku scratched his head. "How could I be a father again if Chi-Chi's not going to be a mother?" he asked, growing more confused by the moment.
Vegeta just stared, anger and frustration welling up in his stomach. "Damnit Kakkarott! Bulma….she is the one having a baby!"
"But how does that make me a father again?" Goku asked almost going cross- eyed trying to puzzle it out, "I mean, Trunks is YOUR son!"
"WHAT?!" Vegeta roared, hope, anger, confusion, and a multitude of other emotions leaping into his throat. The only one he dared show was anger, however, "What the HELL are you talking about Kakkarott?! If the woman's brat is mine, then how did….."
Vegeta and Goku were so wrapped up their discussion, and Chi-Chi was so busy trying to figure out which one to bash first with her frying pan, that none of them paid any attention to the small figure who had staggered into the ER shortly after Goku and Chi-Chi and was now trying to get their attention.
"Uh, Dad," Gohan tried, but Goku was oblivious, trying to convince Vegeta that he wasn't the father of Bulma's baby.
Gohan thought about trying to get his mother's attention, but the gleam in her eye was similar to the one he had seen once when his father had accidentally blown up their bed in his sleep. Gohan decided it would be safer not to chance it.
"So are you telling me you NEVER had sex with the woman?" Vegeta yelled at Goku, referring to Bulma.
Gohan saw his chance. He wasn't quite the evil schemer Trunks was, but he wasn't above a practical joke or two, and he DIDN'T like being ignored.
Gohan cleared his nine-year-old throat and did his best to pipe innocently, "What's sex Vegeta-san?"
THAT got their attention. Three sets of eyes turned to the young one staring innocently up at them. "Kakkarott's brat," Vegeta glared, "what are YOU doing here?"
Gohan ignored that. He was well familiar with such diversionary tactics. Of course he knew the answer to the question. He was a very smart boy, and those college level biology books had answered any questions he might have. But he doubted any of the adults knew that. Especially his mother. When had opened that book two years ago, he had KNOWN his mother hadn't read it over first. Needless to say, he had been very diligent in his studies and had given her no cause to pay it any attention later.
"What's sex Vegeta-san?" he repeated.
Vegeta was about to tell Gohan to ask his father and leave him the hell alone, when a familiar voice chimed in, "Yeah Vegeta, what is sex?"
Goku stood looking at Vegeta with an interested expression. "Chi-Chi told me when we got married that she would tell me someday, but we've never gotten around to it."
One look at Goku's face convinced Vegeta of many things.
One: Kakkarott really WAS an idiot.
Two: There was no way Kakkarott was Gohan's father.
Vegeta had seen the scheming look in the boy's eyes and know the question for what it was. There was no scheming look in Goku's eyes, and no way he could have sired such relatively intelligent offspring. Besides, Vegeta was convinced, there must be some kind of universal law preventing those with an IQ beneath that of a carrot from breeding.
And Three: The woman's child must really be his. There was no way it could be Kakkarott's.
Vegeta almost smiled at that one. Turning to see two sets of innocent eyes still staring up at him Vegeta growled and grabbed them each by an ear. Setting off down the hallway, he burst into the room where Bulma was giving birth. Her labor was far along, and the baby's head was already halfway out.
"That's sex," Vegeta growled, "or at least what it gets you."
Goku took one look, emitted a small "EEP!" and dropped like a brick.
Gohan managed to glare at Vegeta and mutter, "That was a dirty trick Vegeta," before he was overcome by nausea and ran from the room.
Vegeta smirked and walked over to Bulma lying panting on the bed. Taking her hand, he dropped his mental barriers and was immediately overtaken by a surge of pain. If he wanted evidence that his bond was returned, this was certainly it!
Bulma looked up through a haze as the pain she was feeling was suddenly cut in half. There was Vegeta, a pained grimace on his face, holding her hand.
*Vegeta…*
*What woman?*
*How did you know?*
Vegeta snorted, *We're bonded woman. How do you think we're talking? You couldn't speak coherently right now if your life depended on it!*
Bulma's anger sparked momentarily, *Where the hell have you been Vegeta?! How dare you leave me!*
Vegeta did not answer, but through their bond she could sense what he would never say. The pain of which he would never speak, and other, more graceful emotions that he would never allow to touch his lips.
Bulma smiled slightly, bearing down. *I love you too Vegeta…*
______________________
From his position on the floor, Goku almost smiled. They looked so cute! Doing his best to remain limp, Goku almost sighed. He knew he wasn't the world's greatest mind, but sometimes playing the dunderhead got a bit old. Oh well.
Goku waited patiently for someone to notice him. They would examine him and get him a bed, he knew, and if they had any needles he could simply run away. He was much faster than them. It would all be worth it. Goku loved hospital food!
Musing over the scene that had occurred in the lobby, Goku suddenly stopped pretending and fainted for real. He had remembered. Chi-Chi was pregnant!
***Well, that's it! There will be an epilogue up soon, and that will be it. ::Starts crying:: it's over, what am I going to do NOW?! Well, actually, I'm going to be starting two more new fics. After the epilogue, I will be posting an Author's Note containing links and a small summary of the two new fics, and links to my other poor ignored lil fics, so, if you liked this story, be sure to read the Author's Note after the upcoming epilogue for the lowdown on what's up next! Oh, yeah, R&R please! I want to know what you think!***
{A/N}-In response to Asiolek, no I don't have the chapters written already, although I do have a general idea of what I'm going to write usually =) I just write fast! Also, all of the reviews help too—every time I see I have reviews I squeal and jump around *hehe*and it just makes me want to write another chapter!]
_____________________
Last Time:
Vegeta & Bulma:
Striding through door, Vegeta grabbed the first person in a white lab coat that walked by. Bringing the squeaking white-faced human up to eye level, Vegeta demanded, "The woman is having a child. Provide assistance immediately!"
Goku:
"That's what I'm calling about Kakkarott. You are going to be a father again," Vegeta spat with a growl in his voice, "so you had better get to the hospital immediately." Vegeta slammed down the phone.
Goku scratched his head. He was going to be a father again? What was Vegeta talking about?
Chi-Chi looked up in annoyance as Goku entered the room. "No, Goku, dinner's not ready yet," Chi-Chi began to say when Goku rushed up and swung her into his arms.
"Chi-Chi, why didn't you TELL me," Goku exclaimed in panic, flying through the roof, and towards the hospital, the startled Chi-Chi cradled in his arms.
_____________________
As Vegeta stood, arms crossed in the waiting area of the emergency room, a faint bonging sound made him look up. It was an interesting sight to say the least.
In through the emergency entrance, staggered a cringing, sopping wet Goku, holding onto a screaming demon from hell, bashing him repeatedly over the head with a frying pan. Oh wait, that was Chi-Chi!
BONG
BONG
BONG
Goku, relatively oblivious to the beating he was being given, rushed up to the check-in desk. "Hi, I'm Son Goku, and this is my wife Chi-Chi, she's having a baby!" Goku told the nurse at the desk. The startled nurse didn't even get a chance to respond.
"GOOOOKUUUU! I'm not having a baby NOW! And how the HELL did you know I was pregnant anyway," screeched Chi-Chi from his arms.
"You're not?" Goku scratched his head, "but Vegeta told me…."
Chi-Chi's eyes narrowed and swung around the room to find Vegeta leaning against the back wall.
Jumping down from Goku's arms, Chi-Chi stomped, shoes squelching up to the Prince who tried to maintain his bored façade. This was really funny.
BONG
That was not. "What the hell do you think you're doing you crazy bitch," Vegeta yelled, staring down at the dark-haired woman wielding her frying pan.
"Why the hell did you tell Goku I'm pregnant, and how the hell did you know anyway?! I didn't find out myself until yesterday!"
Vegeta snorted, "I didn't tell him anything of the sort woman."
Goku walked over, confused look on his face, "But Vegeta…."
"Can it Kakkarott. I said you were going to be a father again. But not by THIS woman. Surely you know who I'm talking about?"
Goku scratched his head. "How could I be a father again if Chi-Chi's not going to be a mother?" he asked, growing more confused by the moment.
Vegeta just stared, anger and frustration welling up in his stomach. "Damnit Kakkarott! Bulma….she is the one having a baby!"
"But how does that make me a father again?" Goku asked almost going cross- eyed trying to puzzle it out, "I mean, Trunks is YOUR son!"
"WHAT?!" Vegeta roared, hope, anger, confusion, and a multitude of other emotions leaping into his throat. The only one he dared show was anger, however, "What the HELL are you talking about Kakkarott?! If the woman's brat is mine, then how did….."
Vegeta and Goku were so wrapped up their discussion, and Chi-Chi was so busy trying to figure out which one to bash first with her frying pan, that none of them paid any attention to the small figure who had staggered into the ER shortly after Goku and Chi-Chi and was now trying to get their attention.
"Uh, Dad," Gohan tried, but Goku was oblivious, trying to convince Vegeta that he wasn't the father of Bulma's baby.
Gohan thought about trying to get his mother's attention, but the gleam in her eye was similar to the one he had seen once when his father had accidentally blown up their bed in his sleep. Gohan decided it would be safer not to chance it.
"So are you telling me you NEVER had sex with the woman?" Vegeta yelled at Goku, referring to Bulma.
Gohan saw his chance. He wasn't quite the evil schemer Trunks was, but he wasn't above a practical joke or two, and he DIDN'T like being ignored.
Gohan cleared his nine-year-old throat and did his best to pipe innocently, "What's sex Vegeta-san?"
THAT got their attention. Three sets of eyes turned to the young one staring innocently up at them. "Kakkarott's brat," Vegeta glared, "what are YOU doing here?"
Gohan ignored that. He was well familiar with such diversionary tactics. Of course he knew the answer to the question. He was a very smart boy, and those college level biology books had answered any questions he might have. But he doubted any of the adults knew that. Especially his mother. When had opened that book two years ago, he had KNOWN his mother hadn't read it over first. Needless to say, he had been very diligent in his studies and had given her no cause to pay it any attention later.
"What's sex Vegeta-san?" he repeated.
Vegeta was about to tell Gohan to ask his father and leave him the hell alone, when a familiar voice chimed in, "Yeah Vegeta, what is sex?"
Goku stood looking at Vegeta with an interested expression. "Chi-Chi told me when we got married that she would tell me someday, but we've never gotten around to it."
One look at Goku's face convinced Vegeta of many things.
One: Kakkarott really WAS an idiot.
Two: There was no way Kakkarott was Gohan's father.
Vegeta had seen the scheming look in the boy's eyes and know the question for what it was. There was no scheming look in Goku's eyes, and no way he could have sired such relatively intelligent offspring. Besides, Vegeta was convinced, there must be some kind of universal law preventing those with an IQ beneath that of a carrot from breeding.
And Three: The woman's child must really be his. There was no way it could be Kakkarott's.
Vegeta almost smiled at that one. Turning to see two sets of innocent eyes still staring up at him Vegeta growled and grabbed them each by an ear. Setting off down the hallway, he burst into the room where Bulma was giving birth. Her labor was far along, and the baby's head was already halfway out.
"That's sex," Vegeta growled, "or at least what it gets you."
Goku took one look, emitted a small "EEP!" and dropped like a brick.
Gohan managed to glare at Vegeta and mutter, "That was a dirty trick Vegeta," before he was overcome by nausea and ran from the room.
Vegeta smirked and walked over to Bulma lying panting on the bed. Taking her hand, he dropped his mental barriers and was immediately overtaken by a surge of pain. If he wanted evidence that his bond was returned, this was certainly it!
Bulma looked up through a haze as the pain she was feeling was suddenly cut in half. There was Vegeta, a pained grimace on his face, holding her hand.
*Vegeta…*
*What woman?*
*How did you know?*
Vegeta snorted, *We're bonded woman. How do you think we're talking? You couldn't speak coherently right now if your life depended on it!*
Bulma's anger sparked momentarily, *Where the hell have you been Vegeta?! How dare you leave me!*
Vegeta did not answer, but through their bond she could sense what he would never say. The pain of which he would never speak, and other, more graceful emotions that he would never allow to touch his lips.
Bulma smiled slightly, bearing down. *I love you too Vegeta…*
______________________
From his position on the floor, Goku almost smiled. They looked so cute! Doing his best to remain limp, Goku almost sighed. He knew he wasn't the world's greatest mind, but sometimes playing the dunderhead got a bit old. Oh well.
Goku waited patiently for someone to notice him. They would examine him and get him a bed, he knew, and if they had any needles he could simply run away. He was much faster than them. It would all be worth it. Goku loved hospital food!
Musing over the scene that had occurred in the lobby, Goku suddenly stopped pretending and fainted for real. He had remembered. Chi-Chi was pregnant!
***Well, that's it! There will be an epilogue up soon, and that will be it. ::Starts crying:: it's over, what am I going to do NOW?! Well, actually, I'm going to be starting two more new fics. After the epilogue, I will be posting an Author's Note containing links and a small summary of the two new fics, and links to my other poor ignored lil fics, so, if you liked this story, be sure to read the Author's Note after the upcoming epilogue for the lowdown on what's up next! Oh, yeah, R&R please! I want to know what you think!***