Song lyrics copyright 2001 by Trisha Yearwood.
(Chapter 43. February 14. The church and the reception hall.)
Steve entered the church with the minister and turned to watch the processional. He was amazed at the size of the crowd in the church. As he looked around, he recognized people from the diner, Boots, the basketball game, and Ted's wake. They'd had to open the folding partition to the back room of the sanctuary and set up folding chairs to accommodate all the guests. There were easily five hundred people gathered to see Liv married.
The pastor leaned over and said, "They even shut down the third shift at the cheese plant for this wedding."
He searched the crowd and was pleased to find that all of his guests were seated together at the front. Carol sat next to his dad, and they were holding hands. Aunt Dora was crying already, and Uncle Stacey had a comforting arm around her. Steve smiled a bit when he realized Norman Briggs was weeping, too, and Dolores of all people was trying to calm him. Susan and Cheryl sat watching with rapt attention, Cheryl probably remembering her wedding and Susan planning hers. Steve thought it a shame Cheryl's marriage hadn't worked, and wondered for a moment if there ever could have been something between him and her.
Appalled that he would be having such thoughts at his own wedding, he stood straighter and looked down the aisle to the door of the sanctuary. At a gesture from Pastor Brennan, Dion, who had been attending the guest book, darted out the door and came back a moment later.
Steve felt his heart swell as the processional music started. Jack and Amanda entered first. Ever considerate, Liv had asked Jack to be a part of the wedding both in recognition of his long-standing friendship to Steve and to give Amanda a familiar face as an escort. All of the other bridesmaids were members of Cloud Nine. The Hargrove twins, escorted by their husbands came next, then Chris Breth and Kenney. Becky and Jimmy Strawcutter, the tour guides from Gettysburg, came down the aisle just ahead of Alice Strawcutter and Cliff Redmond. Sue Redmond walked with Beechie, and Meghan Baer came down the aisle on the arm of her brother Tom. Steve felt a chill as he realized for the first time just how much Tom looked like Ted.
Finally, Steve saw another friendly face. He realized the moment was drawing near as he saw Jesse enter the sanctuary with Lou Beech on his arm. He hadn't realized before how short Lou was, but she seemed just the right height for Jesse. As Jess took his place, he gave Steve a smile and comforting squeeze on the elbow. Finally, CJ came down the aisle, attended by Lou's daughter, Ginny.
The wedding march started, and May Stephens stood up. Half a beat later, the whole congregation followed suit. Liv came toward him on Jud's arm. She was positively radiant, a beauty for the ages. Her gown was long, with a flowing train, a fitted bodice and sleeves, and a sweetheart neckline that showed off her necklace…and her cleavage…spectacularly. Heart-shaped cutouts on the skirt and train were echoed along the sleeves, and all the hearts were filled with delicate lace. The bodice of the dress was richly embroidered with hearts, flowers, and doves.
As she came closer, Steve could see her lovely face smiling softly through the almost transparent veil, her eyes aglow with lovelight. Her hair cascaded around her face in wild, unruly curls. It was almost a living thing. True to her word, she had honored his request not to hide her freckles behind makeup. She wore pale lipstick, eye shadow, and mascara, but nothing else covered her flawless skin. Her green-and-gold eyes looked at him with so much love it made him tremble to the core. Such love was a gift, he knew; and he was determined to do everything he could to deserve it.
Steve felt a lump rise in his throat. She was stunning, and she was his.
"Dearly beloved, we are gathered together here in the sight of God to join together this Man and this Woman in holy Matrimony…" The minister's opening remarks and welcome were drowned out by the sound of his own pulse pounding in Steve's ears. All Steve knew was he was looking at the most beautiful, wonderful, loving woman he'd ever known, and he was about to marry her, and he wasn't sure he was doing the right thing.
"Therefore if any man can show any just cause, why they may not be joined together, let him now speak, or else hereafter for ever hold his peace."
To his own absolute horror, and to gasps of shock and surprise from the whole congregation, Steve heard himself say, "Wait!"
"Steve?"
Turning to Liv, he said, "I need to talk to you, outside, now." He gently took her by the arm, turned her around, and nudged her down the aisle.
Keith was seated in his wheelchair at the back of the sanctuary. When Steve got to him, without even asking, he unlocked the brakes of the wheelchair, turned him around, and wheeled him out behind Liv, saying, "I need to talk to you, too."
As he exited the church with Keith, Liv whirled on him, green-gold eyes snapping fire.
"Steven Michael Sloan, what the hell is going on?"
He locked the brakes on the wheelchair and stepped aside so he could face both Liv and Keith.
"I heard you two talking last night, Liv."
Suddenly the fire was gone. "Oh."
Keith snapped, "How much did you hear?"
"Enough to know I need to ask some questions before I go through with this." Turning to Liv, he said, "You never really answered his question last night. Do you love me more than him?"
"Steve, please," Liv wept.
He shook his head and said softly, "I need to know, Liv."
Keith offered her his handkerchief, and she dabbed at her eyes.
"It's not that easy, Steve. For twelve years, all I wanted was to come home to him. Then I met you, and you filled up the aching emptiness inside me. I was broken…damaged. I was afraid to care. You taught me how to love again. You taught me how to love you, Steve."
Gently, he urged her, "Answer the question, Liv. Who do you love more?"
"I don't know," she wailed.
After some thought, Steve changed the question.
"All things being equal, who would you rather marry?"
She shrugged.
She always shrugged when she didn't want to say what was on her mind.
Steve knew what he had to do. Subtle as it was, he knew that shrug was the sign he'd asked for earlier in the day.
Stepping close to her, he cupped her chin in his hand and tilted her head up so she had to look at him.
"If this is what you really want, I'll marry you, Liv. But I *don't* want you to marry me because I treat you well, or even because we'll be happy together. I want to be the love of your life."
Tears were streaming down his face and hers as Keith watched in total consternation.
"I deserve to be the center of someone's universe, Liv, and I will not settle for less than that. You deserve to be with the man God made for you, and right now, I'm not sure that's me."
"Oh, Steve…"
"I don't want to be just another promise kept," he said in a slightly bitter tone.
"You're much more than that, Steve."
"Maybe, Liv, but can you stand here, in front of him," he gestured to Keith, "and honestly say you love me more than any man in the world?"
She said nothing. She didn't even move.
"Think about the people in the church. There must be five hundred people here, for you, Liv. I have barely more than a dozen guests, the rest are all here for *you*. This is your world, darling. You brought these people together. You *keep* them together. I don't belong here, and I can't take you away from them unless you want to be with me more than anything else in the world."
"I do love you, Steve," she said. Lowering her eyes, she added, "And I made you a promise."
Steve rubbed her shoulders and sighed. "I love you, too, Liv, and I want you; but more than anything, I want you to follow your heart. I'm releasing you from that promise. Do what you want. Do what will make you happiest."
Turning to Keith, he said, "You have five minutes. When I come back, if she still wants to marry me, I will spend the rest of my life trying to make her forget you."
Steve walked away stiffly. The cold February wind cut right through the thin jacket of his tuxedo. As he rounded the corner of the church, he stopped, trembling, and prayed.
"Dear God, let this be the right thing, and if she chooses him, let there still be someone out there for me."
He waited at least five minutes before he went back to Liv and Keith.
Looking hopefully at Liv, he said, "Well?"
"I love you, Steve, and I'm so, so sorry, but you're right. You deserve to be the love of some woman's life, and one day you will find her. I promise. But I'm not that woman, and as much as I love you, it will never be enough, because…God has always has had someone else in mind for me."
She studied her engagement ring for a moment before taking it off and handing it to him.
He shook his head. "Keep it, it was made for you."
"Steve, I can't. This ring implies a promise, and my conscience will not let me keep one and not the other."
Reluctantly, he accepted the ring. "What should I do with it?"
She shrugged. "Keep it, sell it, throw it into the ocean for all I care. It's just metal and stones and shells. Everything it stands for is in our hearts forever."
Suddenly he got down on one knee and asked, "Make me a new promise to replace the old one?"
"What is it?"
"Promise me that you will live joyfully, laugh often, love passionately, cling to you happiness, and let your sorrows go. Promise to think of me often and fondly, and when you do, know that I am happy for you. Know that you have shown me how to have faith. Know that I will be ok."
"Oh, Steve," she nodded. "I promise."
He slipped the ring back on her finger. "Will you let me give away the bride?"
"Are you sure you want to?"
"Yeah," he said after some thought. "I really do want to. More than anything, I want to see you as happy as you can be. If that means giving you away to someone else, it would be an honor and a privilege. I love you so much, Liv, there's no other way to show it."
She gave him a tender, gentle kiss on the cheek. Then she stepped back to stand by Keith.
"I…We will never be able to thank you enough, Steve."
"You don't have to," he smiled. "I think this is why I'm here. A while ago, you told me God has a plan for all of us. I'm not sure when it happened, but I started believing that. Maybe I was just supposed to bring you home."
Turning to Keith, Steve continued, "Forget about the farmers with their pitchforks and scythes. Forget about the cops and all the people whose jobs she's saved. Forget about Jeffrey Geiger. If you hurt her, I will come back here, and I will tear you apart with my bare hands."
Keith eyed him warily, and asked, "Why are you doing this?"
"Because I love her."
"You could have had her, beach bum. Why let her go?"
"Because I love her that much."
Keith nodded, accepting the explanation, and said, "You're a better man than I am, Steve."
Steve broke into a grin. Then he started to laugh.
"What's so funny," Keith wanted to know.
"Invite me back for your silver wedding anniversary, and I'll explain."
Just then, Jesse poked his head out the door, "Yo, Steve, the natives are getting restless. What's up?"
Looking at Keith, he said, "You want your brother to stand up for you?"
Keith nodded.
Steve told Jesse, "Take Keith to the altar, Jess. Tell Jud to have a seat, tell the minister there's going to be a wedding and he should cue the organist when he sees Liv and me at the door. Then switch places with Kenney."
"You sure?"
Nodding, he said with certainty, "I'm sure."
When Jesse reentered the sanctuary and pushed Keith to the altar, there was much murmured speculation and discussion. The muttering continued as the best man held a whispered conversation with the minister and then switched places with one of the groomsmen.
Before they entered the church again, Liv looked at Steve and asked, "Is this legal?"
"Yep. Since the license isn't filed until after the ceremony anyway, you can wait and apply for a new one when you get back from the honeymoon."
Then she stopped and turned to him.
"Will you be ok?"
She saw a shudder run through Steve, but when he spoke, it was with a steady voice.
"This hurts, Liv. It's hard, but it feels right. It will take some time, but I'll be ok. Now let's go."
This time the wedding went off without a hitch. The bewildered congregation readily accepted the strange turn of events when Steve gave away the bride and offered a few words of explanation.
"I love Olivia more than any woman I have ever met," he said, "but she and Keith were made for each other. I am merely an interloper, and it would not be fair for me to come between them. I am pleased and proud to be a part of this special day. I wish them both much happiness in the years to come."
As they filtered out of the church, Steve's family and friends gravitated toward him. He was profoundly grateful for the support. His dad put an arm around him and said, "What do you want to do, son?"
Still in a daze, sheltered from the pain and loss by the shock of what had happened, he said, "I think we ought to go to the reception, Dad. We should show Liv how happy we are for her."
"You sure you're up for that," Jack asked.
"Uh, yeah, I'll be ok. Just, stick close, ok guys?"
Of course, everyone agreed to 'stick close.'
Steve ate very little at the reception. The food was good, but he had no stomach for it. He watched dispassionately as Liv and Keith had their first dance as man and wife. He sat in his chair and held her hands as she danced around him. A while later, Jud danced with her. At some point, they brought around slices of wedding cake, and Steve tried just a bite. He'd heard it was bad luck if every guest didn't have at least a little bit of cake.
He tried to respond when someone wanted to make small talk, but again and again, he slipped into his own little world. He found himself remembering moments from the past...God, it had been exactly six months. He realized he wouldn't change a thing, even if he could. It had all been wonderful, even the worst parts were…awesome…because Liv had been there. As the dancing started again, he went to the DJ and requested a song.
"I'm not sure she'll want to dance with me. If she doesn't, play something else, ok?"
The DJ was another old friend of Liv's and he understood Steve's request. Liv was just finishing a dance with Beechie when he asked to cut in.
"You don't mind, do you, Liv?"
"Oh, God, no, Steve, not at all. I was hoping you'd ask."
He smiled. "Good. I requested a special song."
Olivia frowned and then smiled, a bit sadly, as she recognized the music. As the vocals started, she reached up and wiped a tear from Steve's cheek.
If I had known how this would end,
If I had read the last page first,
If I had had the strength to walk away,
If I had known how this would hurt,
I would have loved you anyway,
I'd do it all the same,
Not a second I would change,
Not a touch that I would trade.
Had I known my heart would break,
I'd have loved you anyway.
She laid her head against his chest and tapped out the rhythm of his heartbeat, a little faster than usual, against his ribs as she sang along with the next verse.
It's bitter sweet to look back now,
At memories withered on the vine,
Just to hold you close to me
For a moment in time.
I would have loved you anyway,
I'd do it all the same,
Not a second I would change,
Not a touch that I would trade.
Had I known my heart would break,
I'd have loved you anyway.
She stepped back and stared into his eyes and they continued to dance, neither of them aware that they were the only ones on the floor. All the other guests and the wedding party were watching them spellbound. The two of them were lost inside each other one last time.
And even if I'd seen it coming
You'd still have seen me running
Right into your arms.
I would have loved you anyway,
I'd do it all the same,
Not a second I would change,
Not a touch that I would trade.
Had I known my heart would break,
I'd have loved you anyway.
As the song wound down, Steve swallowed hard and said, "I've got to go now. I can't stay any longer. Be happy and live a good life. You might not hear from me for a long time, Liv. It hurts too much."
She gently caressed his face, again wiping his tears away, still heedless of her own.
"Steven Michael Sloan, I will always think of you fondly and treasure the memories of what we had, but I will always love you most for what you have given me today by letting me go."
He kissed her hand and walked away without another word. Halfway out of the room, he heard her call his name.
"Steve!"
He froze, and she walked to him. As she came to stand before him, he looked away, closing his eyes and turning his head.
"Please, Liv, I can't," he nearly sobbed.
"I'll keep my promise," she said softly, and stepped aside to let him escape.
(Chapter 43. February 14. The church and the reception hall.)
Steve entered the church with the minister and turned to watch the processional. He was amazed at the size of the crowd in the church. As he looked around, he recognized people from the diner, Boots, the basketball game, and Ted's wake. They'd had to open the folding partition to the back room of the sanctuary and set up folding chairs to accommodate all the guests. There were easily five hundred people gathered to see Liv married.
The pastor leaned over and said, "They even shut down the third shift at the cheese plant for this wedding."
He searched the crowd and was pleased to find that all of his guests were seated together at the front. Carol sat next to his dad, and they were holding hands. Aunt Dora was crying already, and Uncle Stacey had a comforting arm around her. Steve smiled a bit when he realized Norman Briggs was weeping, too, and Dolores of all people was trying to calm him. Susan and Cheryl sat watching with rapt attention, Cheryl probably remembering her wedding and Susan planning hers. Steve thought it a shame Cheryl's marriage hadn't worked, and wondered for a moment if there ever could have been something between him and her.
Appalled that he would be having such thoughts at his own wedding, he stood straighter and looked down the aisle to the door of the sanctuary. At a gesture from Pastor Brennan, Dion, who had been attending the guest book, darted out the door and came back a moment later.
Steve felt his heart swell as the processional music started. Jack and Amanda entered first. Ever considerate, Liv had asked Jack to be a part of the wedding both in recognition of his long-standing friendship to Steve and to give Amanda a familiar face as an escort. All of the other bridesmaids were members of Cloud Nine. The Hargrove twins, escorted by their husbands came next, then Chris Breth and Kenney. Becky and Jimmy Strawcutter, the tour guides from Gettysburg, came down the aisle just ahead of Alice Strawcutter and Cliff Redmond. Sue Redmond walked with Beechie, and Meghan Baer came down the aisle on the arm of her brother Tom. Steve felt a chill as he realized for the first time just how much Tom looked like Ted.
Finally, Steve saw another friendly face. He realized the moment was drawing near as he saw Jesse enter the sanctuary with Lou Beech on his arm. He hadn't realized before how short Lou was, but she seemed just the right height for Jesse. As Jess took his place, he gave Steve a smile and comforting squeeze on the elbow. Finally, CJ came down the aisle, attended by Lou's daughter, Ginny.
The wedding march started, and May Stephens stood up. Half a beat later, the whole congregation followed suit. Liv came toward him on Jud's arm. She was positively radiant, a beauty for the ages. Her gown was long, with a flowing train, a fitted bodice and sleeves, and a sweetheart neckline that showed off her necklace…and her cleavage…spectacularly. Heart-shaped cutouts on the skirt and train were echoed along the sleeves, and all the hearts were filled with delicate lace. The bodice of the dress was richly embroidered with hearts, flowers, and doves.
As she came closer, Steve could see her lovely face smiling softly through the almost transparent veil, her eyes aglow with lovelight. Her hair cascaded around her face in wild, unruly curls. It was almost a living thing. True to her word, she had honored his request not to hide her freckles behind makeup. She wore pale lipstick, eye shadow, and mascara, but nothing else covered her flawless skin. Her green-and-gold eyes looked at him with so much love it made him tremble to the core. Such love was a gift, he knew; and he was determined to do everything he could to deserve it.
Steve felt a lump rise in his throat. She was stunning, and she was his.
"Dearly beloved, we are gathered together here in the sight of God to join together this Man and this Woman in holy Matrimony…" The minister's opening remarks and welcome were drowned out by the sound of his own pulse pounding in Steve's ears. All Steve knew was he was looking at the most beautiful, wonderful, loving woman he'd ever known, and he was about to marry her, and he wasn't sure he was doing the right thing.
"Therefore if any man can show any just cause, why they may not be joined together, let him now speak, or else hereafter for ever hold his peace."
To his own absolute horror, and to gasps of shock and surprise from the whole congregation, Steve heard himself say, "Wait!"
"Steve?"
Turning to Liv, he said, "I need to talk to you, outside, now." He gently took her by the arm, turned her around, and nudged her down the aisle.
Keith was seated in his wheelchair at the back of the sanctuary. When Steve got to him, without even asking, he unlocked the brakes of the wheelchair, turned him around, and wheeled him out behind Liv, saying, "I need to talk to you, too."
As he exited the church with Keith, Liv whirled on him, green-gold eyes snapping fire.
"Steven Michael Sloan, what the hell is going on?"
He locked the brakes on the wheelchair and stepped aside so he could face both Liv and Keith.
"I heard you two talking last night, Liv."
Suddenly the fire was gone. "Oh."
Keith snapped, "How much did you hear?"
"Enough to know I need to ask some questions before I go through with this." Turning to Liv, he said, "You never really answered his question last night. Do you love me more than him?"
"Steve, please," Liv wept.
He shook his head and said softly, "I need to know, Liv."
Keith offered her his handkerchief, and she dabbed at her eyes.
"It's not that easy, Steve. For twelve years, all I wanted was to come home to him. Then I met you, and you filled up the aching emptiness inside me. I was broken…damaged. I was afraid to care. You taught me how to love again. You taught me how to love you, Steve."
Gently, he urged her, "Answer the question, Liv. Who do you love more?"
"I don't know," she wailed.
After some thought, Steve changed the question.
"All things being equal, who would you rather marry?"
She shrugged.
She always shrugged when she didn't want to say what was on her mind.
Steve knew what he had to do. Subtle as it was, he knew that shrug was the sign he'd asked for earlier in the day.
Stepping close to her, he cupped her chin in his hand and tilted her head up so she had to look at him.
"If this is what you really want, I'll marry you, Liv. But I *don't* want you to marry me because I treat you well, or even because we'll be happy together. I want to be the love of your life."
Tears were streaming down his face and hers as Keith watched in total consternation.
"I deserve to be the center of someone's universe, Liv, and I will not settle for less than that. You deserve to be with the man God made for you, and right now, I'm not sure that's me."
"Oh, Steve…"
"I don't want to be just another promise kept," he said in a slightly bitter tone.
"You're much more than that, Steve."
"Maybe, Liv, but can you stand here, in front of him," he gestured to Keith, "and honestly say you love me more than any man in the world?"
She said nothing. She didn't even move.
"Think about the people in the church. There must be five hundred people here, for you, Liv. I have barely more than a dozen guests, the rest are all here for *you*. This is your world, darling. You brought these people together. You *keep* them together. I don't belong here, and I can't take you away from them unless you want to be with me more than anything else in the world."
"I do love you, Steve," she said. Lowering her eyes, she added, "And I made you a promise."
Steve rubbed her shoulders and sighed. "I love you, too, Liv, and I want you; but more than anything, I want you to follow your heart. I'm releasing you from that promise. Do what you want. Do what will make you happiest."
Turning to Keith, he said, "You have five minutes. When I come back, if she still wants to marry me, I will spend the rest of my life trying to make her forget you."
Steve walked away stiffly. The cold February wind cut right through the thin jacket of his tuxedo. As he rounded the corner of the church, he stopped, trembling, and prayed.
"Dear God, let this be the right thing, and if she chooses him, let there still be someone out there for me."
He waited at least five minutes before he went back to Liv and Keith.
Looking hopefully at Liv, he said, "Well?"
"I love you, Steve, and I'm so, so sorry, but you're right. You deserve to be the love of some woman's life, and one day you will find her. I promise. But I'm not that woman, and as much as I love you, it will never be enough, because…God has always has had someone else in mind for me."
She studied her engagement ring for a moment before taking it off and handing it to him.
He shook his head. "Keep it, it was made for you."
"Steve, I can't. This ring implies a promise, and my conscience will not let me keep one and not the other."
Reluctantly, he accepted the ring. "What should I do with it?"
She shrugged. "Keep it, sell it, throw it into the ocean for all I care. It's just metal and stones and shells. Everything it stands for is in our hearts forever."
Suddenly he got down on one knee and asked, "Make me a new promise to replace the old one?"
"What is it?"
"Promise me that you will live joyfully, laugh often, love passionately, cling to you happiness, and let your sorrows go. Promise to think of me often and fondly, and when you do, know that I am happy for you. Know that you have shown me how to have faith. Know that I will be ok."
"Oh, Steve," she nodded. "I promise."
He slipped the ring back on her finger. "Will you let me give away the bride?"
"Are you sure you want to?"
"Yeah," he said after some thought. "I really do want to. More than anything, I want to see you as happy as you can be. If that means giving you away to someone else, it would be an honor and a privilege. I love you so much, Liv, there's no other way to show it."
She gave him a tender, gentle kiss on the cheek. Then she stepped back to stand by Keith.
"I…We will never be able to thank you enough, Steve."
"You don't have to," he smiled. "I think this is why I'm here. A while ago, you told me God has a plan for all of us. I'm not sure when it happened, but I started believing that. Maybe I was just supposed to bring you home."
Turning to Keith, Steve continued, "Forget about the farmers with their pitchforks and scythes. Forget about the cops and all the people whose jobs she's saved. Forget about Jeffrey Geiger. If you hurt her, I will come back here, and I will tear you apart with my bare hands."
Keith eyed him warily, and asked, "Why are you doing this?"
"Because I love her."
"You could have had her, beach bum. Why let her go?"
"Because I love her that much."
Keith nodded, accepting the explanation, and said, "You're a better man than I am, Steve."
Steve broke into a grin. Then he started to laugh.
"What's so funny," Keith wanted to know.
"Invite me back for your silver wedding anniversary, and I'll explain."
Just then, Jesse poked his head out the door, "Yo, Steve, the natives are getting restless. What's up?"
Looking at Keith, he said, "You want your brother to stand up for you?"
Keith nodded.
Steve told Jesse, "Take Keith to the altar, Jess. Tell Jud to have a seat, tell the minister there's going to be a wedding and he should cue the organist when he sees Liv and me at the door. Then switch places with Kenney."
"You sure?"
Nodding, he said with certainty, "I'm sure."
When Jesse reentered the sanctuary and pushed Keith to the altar, there was much murmured speculation and discussion. The muttering continued as the best man held a whispered conversation with the minister and then switched places with one of the groomsmen.
Before they entered the church again, Liv looked at Steve and asked, "Is this legal?"
"Yep. Since the license isn't filed until after the ceremony anyway, you can wait and apply for a new one when you get back from the honeymoon."
Then she stopped and turned to him.
"Will you be ok?"
She saw a shudder run through Steve, but when he spoke, it was with a steady voice.
"This hurts, Liv. It's hard, but it feels right. It will take some time, but I'll be ok. Now let's go."
This time the wedding went off without a hitch. The bewildered congregation readily accepted the strange turn of events when Steve gave away the bride and offered a few words of explanation.
"I love Olivia more than any woman I have ever met," he said, "but she and Keith were made for each other. I am merely an interloper, and it would not be fair for me to come between them. I am pleased and proud to be a part of this special day. I wish them both much happiness in the years to come."
As they filtered out of the church, Steve's family and friends gravitated toward him. He was profoundly grateful for the support. His dad put an arm around him and said, "What do you want to do, son?"
Still in a daze, sheltered from the pain and loss by the shock of what had happened, he said, "I think we ought to go to the reception, Dad. We should show Liv how happy we are for her."
"You sure you're up for that," Jack asked.
"Uh, yeah, I'll be ok. Just, stick close, ok guys?"
Of course, everyone agreed to 'stick close.'
Steve ate very little at the reception. The food was good, but he had no stomach for it. He watched dispassionately as Liv and Keith had their first dance as man and wife. He sat in his chair and held her hands as she danced around him. A while later, Jud danced with her. At some point, they brought around slices of wedding cake, and Steve tried just a bite. He'd heard it was bad luck if every guest didn't have at least a little bit of cake.
He tried to respond when someone wanted to make small talk, but again and again, he slipped into his own little world. He found himself remembering moments from the past...God, it had been exactly six months. He realized he wouldn't change a thing, even if he could. It had all been wonderful, even the worst parts were…awesome…because Liv had been there. As the dancing started again, he went to the DJ and requested a song.
"I'm not sure she'll want to dance with me. If she doesn't, play something else, ok?"
The DJ was another old friend of Liv's and he understood Steve's request. Liv was just finishing a dance with Beechie when he asked to cut in.
"You don't mind, do you, Liv?"
"Oh, God, no, Steve, not at all. I was hoping you'd ask."
He smiled. "Good. I requested a special song."
Olivia frowned and then smiled, a bit sadly, as she recognized the music. As the vocals started, she reached up and wiped a tear from Steve's cheek.
If I had known how this would end,
If I had read the last page first,
If I had had the strength to walk away,
If I had known how this would hurt,
I would have loved you anyway,
I'd do it all the same,
Not a second I would change,
Not a touch that I would trade.
Had I known my heart would break,
I'd have loved you anyway.
She laid her head against his chest and tapped out the rhythm of his heartbeat, a little faster than usual, against his ribs as she sang along with the next verse.
It's bitter sweet to look back now,
At memories withered on the vine,
Just to hold you close to me
For a moment in time.
I would have loved you anyway,
I'd do it all the same,
Not a second I would change,
Not a touch that I would trade.
Had I known my heart would break,
I'd have loved you anyway.
She stepped back and stared into his eyes and they continued to dance, neither of them aware that they were the only ones on the floor. All the other guests and the wedding party were watching them spellbound. The two of them were lost inside each other one last time.
And even if I'd seen it coming
You'd still have seen me running
Right into your arms.
I would have loved you anyway,
I'd do it all the same,
Not a second I would change,
Not a touch that I would trade.
Had I known my heart would break,
I'd have loved you anyway.
As the song wound down, Steve swallowed hard and said, "I've got to go now. I can't stay any longer. Be happy and live a good life. You might not hear from me for a long time, Liv. It hurts too much."
She gently caressed his face, again wiping his tears away, still heedless of her own.
"Steven Michael Sloan, I will always think of you fondly and treasure the memories of what we had, but I will always love you most for what you have given me today by letting me go."
He kissed her hand and walked away without another word. Halfway out of the room, he heard her call his name.
"Steve!"
He froze, and she walked to him. As she came to stand before him, he looked away, closing his eyes and turning his head.
"Please, Liv, I can't," he nearly sobbed.
"I'll keep my promise," she said softly, and stepped aside to let him escape.