Desperate
by Lady Alekto
AN: 1. This is my first HP-story and it's centered around George and Fred (as you will notice shortly). It's very, very sad, so don't read if you can't handle this. 2. English is not my mothertongue, so try not to be mad with me when there are too many mistakes. 3. *innocently* Reviews please? I want to know how badly you really think of my writing.
Disclaimer: Harry Potter and the other characters used in this story aren't mine. They belong to JKR Rowling, and I'm just borrowing them.
Pairings: none (but maybe there will be in future, I'm not sure though)
Warnings: Suicide attempt, angst (for now)
Rating: R
I'll give my heart to you
I'll make your dream come true
I'd rather die than know
That you don't love me anymore
(Sky's Memories)
Chapter 1
He sat in a dark room. The only light came through the slit under the door. He was shivering, but not only from the cold. He curled himself into the corner and started to sob silently. His cheeks were burning from embarrassment and shame. he buried his face into his palms and started to sob harder. He was desperate, he was without his second half. George was downstairs, loudly talking to his girlfriend Angelique. Fred wasn't good enough anymore, he was never good enough. He was the weaker half, he realized in his self-hatred. He wasn't anything without his brother, while George was ... everything.
Fred hadn't liked Angelique from the beginning. The girl had a way of forcing herself into the middle, and she had forced herself in-between something seemingly unbreakable, their twins-bond.
When Fred had found out that Angelique bore the dark mark, he had run to his brother immediately. But the one thing, Fred would have never believed possible happened: His brother hadn't believed him. George had yelled at him, for the first time in their lives, and now Fred hated himself for letting it come so far. He should've never told George, he should've shown evidence, but he had none.
"I hate you"
George had said, and Fred had died. George just had turned away and left the room, Fred hadn't left since then. the sun had now disappeared and it was dark in there, and cold. Fred picked himself up and walked into the bathroom, staring at the reflection he saw within the mirror.
Mirrors had always fascinated him, it was as if looking at his twin. But now he couldn't see George in the mirror. He just saw Fred. Fred how he always had been. Skin much too pale, reddened eyes and tear streaks over his cheeks.
His eyes fell onto the sleeping pills that lay innocently on the board beside the sink.
Sleep. It sounded like something he desperately needed. Yes, he wanted to sleep. He knew what to do.
George wanted to live with Angelique, he didn't want his brother anymore.
"I hate you"
He wouldn't stand in the way. George wanted a perfect life, but there was no place for Fred. There was one thing he could do, and he would.
"I hate you" Georges eyes were blazing from anger "Leave"
The exact words George had used, but he hadn't told Fred where to. Fred knew where he would leave to. He climbed into the bathtub, still shivering. He turned on the warm water. It offered a little warmth, soon it turned to burning hot, but Fred didn't care. He clutched the package with the sleeping pills in his right hand. He stared at it fascinated, his way out here. He wouldn't even make a mess that anybody would have to clean up. He would just be away.
Why didn't George realize how much he loved him?
He tore the package open and took the pills out. They were small and innocently white.
Why didn't George know how much he needed him.
He stared at the little pure pills on his palm. Fred picked up one and swallowed it. It was a uncomfortable feeling in his dry throat. He held his mouth in the stream of the steaming hot water and burned his tongue with it. He didn't care, he was beyond pain.
I love you so much I'll make you happy.
He took another one of the pills.
I'd do anything for you to be happy.
He took another one.
I will make you happy, If my death is what you want, I swear I'll make you happy.
He swallowed the rest of the pills at once, didn't care when he nearly choked at them.
The hot water stream still hit his skin that was flushed and red at this time. His tears weren't recognizable any more under all those water-pearls, but they were there.
His eyes were getting heavy.
I can't live with your hate,
I ... love ... you ... brother.
Everything went dark.
~ End Chapter 1 ~
PS: Review! You know you want to!