Desperate
by Lady Alekto
AN: I'm so very sorry for yet another delay, but unfortunately I got sick and had to stay in bed for a few days. Before I already mentioned we had our ball to prepare and now I finally found the time to finish chapter 6. I apologize again to all those who were waiting for this chapter.
I also want to thank all those very nice people who reviewed me.
I'll try to finish the next chapter faster, but I'll be very busy due to the circumstance that I couldn't go to school for a week. I hope you won't be to mad at me.
Disclaimer: Harry Potter and the other characters used in this story aren't mine. They belong to JK Rowling, and I'm just borrowing them.
Pairings: Angelique/George
Warnings: Suicide attempt, angst, blood spells
Rating: R
Please don't ignore me
when my world is crumbling
Please don't ignore me
when my heart is numbing
from the pain it has to bear
(Skyjacker)
Chapter 6
Fred opened his eyes ever so slowly as he left the darkness he wanted to melt into so much. This cost him a great amount of power he didn't even know he had. He was barely able to move anything, he felt so numb, he was so tired. He wanted to sleep again as his energy started to fade again.
His eyes met Georges'. George was leaning over him, tears on his cheeks, saying something he couldn't quite understand, probably because the room was spinning around him. But for a second it was strangely comforting, just to see his brothers, his twins face and to pretend they hadn't grown apart so much... so much it hurt.
Taking a breath he tried to talk, but he found he couldn't, his throat was too sore. He wanted to sleep. He just wanted to sleep again, away from George, away from his problems, away from this damned world.
The blackness had been so comforting, so uncomplicated. But the red thread wouldn't let him fall. Why couldn't he just be dead. He had intended to die. He wanted to save George the trouble, wanted to spare himself the trouble. But George was crying.
He hadn't meant to make George cry. He just wanted to make him happy, if he couldn't be happy, then George should. Fred wanted to cry. How should he make George happy, when that damned bastard wouldn't even be happy if he got his life on a silver platter? What else could he do? He wanted to scream, but only a cough escaped his throat.
Another person entered his eyesight. Madam Pomfrey? She must have been the one that revived him. He wanted to be angry, but he found he couldn't. He just was to tired to be angry, and he couldn't be angry with her. It wasn't her fault, not really. It was his fault and Georges and Angeliques, what a pitiful situation.
She held a cup to his mouth and made him drink. He didn't really have a choice, so he swallowed.
The fog around his mind lifted slowly. The numbness disappeared making way for a burning that spread through his whole body. He moaned from pain, but as quickly as it had started it ended.
"Fred, oh gods, I thought you'd never wake up!" he heard George crying. "I'm so sorry, whatever I said, I didn't mean it, oh please..."
A weight fell on his chest, and he realized that it was Georges' head. He was shaking, his tears wetting Freds' skin. He felt two arms encircling his body and spreading a gentle warmth that he had missed so much.
Tears stung in Freds own eyes. "I'm sorry" he whispered, lifting his thin hands with all the energy he could afford, embracing Georges sobbing form. "I'm sorry" he said again.
George lifted his head, staring him directly in the eyes. "It's not your fault, don't be sorry"
Fred looked away. It was his fault. Everything was his fault. He had betrayed George, he had hurt him, and he did manage to even hurt him more.
Gentle hands were enclosing his face. "Why?" asked George.
It was such a simple question, now, wasn't it? 'Why?' it was so simple he could laugh about it.
"Just because" he answered.
George opened his mouth to reply something, but he was interrupted as the door burst open.
Madam Pomfrey entered the room... when had she left? Directly followed by .. oh gods no.. Mum! Please no... 'Go away' he willed them. They wouldn't. He started to cry again.
"Fred! George! Dear god, what happened? As I received Rons note I came as fast as I could? Fred?" She rushed to his side, her mouth opening, the pain evident in her eyes as she took in the form of his body.
Fred closed his eyes, starting to cry. He hurt her too. Why couldn't he just have stayed in the blackness.
Then he felt his shaking body being lifted into a warm embrace. He felt Georges hand stroking his back gently as he cried into his twins shoulder...
***
Percy was silently walking through the corridors of the Ministry, carrying a brown folder. He had been right, and maybe the contents of this would help him understand.
When he reached a deserted office he sat down and opened the folder. It held a great amount of brownish pages, parchment. The first page was entitled 'Angelique Nero'.
22 August
The flat of suspected Death Eater Angelique Nero was searched for evidence. Found were several documents that prove her connection to 'You Know Who' (copies enclosed) and several book about Dark Magic. Also found was a collection of spells (copies enclosed) that couldn't be categorized yet ...
Percy flipped through the pages, one of them catching his eye. Its title?
The three spells of heart blood
Amoratis
Sognatris
Mortalis
***
When Molly Weasley rushed into the room, George kept his attention on his brother. Fred started to cry again and George cradled him to his body. At the verge of tears himself he stared up at his mother.
" Fred! George! Dear god, what happened? As I received Rons note I came as fast as I could? Fred?" She gently touched Freds shoulder, who urged away from the contact. George could see the pain this reaction Freds obviously caused in his mothers eyes. He bit his lip, trying to find the right words. He held a strange sense of understanding for his brothers actions and clutched him even tighter.
"Mom, I ... I think you should go and talk to ... Madam Pomfrey first. I'm sure she'll tell you everything" he said, trying to get her to leave the room. He felt like he was doing badly, but his mother smiled slightly, understanding and left the room.
"Fred!" George shook his twin slightly "Fred..." he asked softer.
"Let me go back George! Please, it hurts so much!" Fred whispered through his sobs.
Burying his face in his brothers hair George started to cry too "Fred, tell me what is hurting you so much, I can sense it, it burns, so hot, I want to help you! Please let me, oh god, please let me!"
"You can't! I won't hurt you! I ... please, never you ... never ... never you!" Fred gasped trying to crawl out of his twins embrace. But George held him even closer.
"Shh, shh, the pictures in your head, what do they mean, tell me!" he whispered, not even knowing why he said that.
Fred cried out in alarm "What pictures? What did you see?" he asked, horror written on his face. George could see it as Fred finally found enough strength to pull out of his embrace.
"You, and Angel." George whispered.
Two tears escaped Freds eyes and ran down his cheeks silently while the moment got longer and longer. "So you do really hate me, if you know" Fred stated.
George seized Freds shoulders a little roughly and forced Fred to look into his eyes. "I. Do. Not. Hate. You! ... How could you ever think so? I still don't understand the picture! Was it a memory?"
Fred smiled, only slightly "A dream" he whispered.
"A...You had dreams of Angelique?" George asked startled "But... you said you had nightmares ... you had ..." he was utterly lost in his own train of thoughts.
"George, understand! You had Angelique, I would have never interrupted, never I ..." Fred was stopped by a finger on his mouth.
"Let me think, please?" George asked. "You had a crush on Angelique?" he blubbered out a few heartbeats later.
Fred buried his face in the pillow he had rested his head on. "Now you hate me" he sobbed.
George closed his eyes and sighed defeated. "This was all this was about? You liked her too? Why didn't you just tell me?" George opened his eyes again "Oh gods, I can't believe I nearly lost you because of some girl" 'some very beautiful, intelligent girl' his mind threw in. George framed Freds eyes with his hands. "Don't you understand Gred, you are infinitely more worth than any damn girl on that planet! I would have shared her, you know! I would have given her to you, just to make you happy!" he said hysterically.
"Just like I did" Fred answered.
At this George burst into tears and started sobbing uncontrollably into Freds neck. His own rude words that he had thrown at Fred in the past weeks rumored in his thoughts.
I don't have time for that now.
Come back later, Angelique is coming
Can't this wait
Go away
I hate you
" ... 'msorry msrry sorry sorry..." he repeated this like a mantra while being held by Fred. He looked up, now looking nearly as bad as Fred himself "Gods, will you ever forgive me... for what I've done?"
Fred smiled. "I love you Forge" he said and smiled contentedly, leaning into their embrace. Few minutes later both were fast asleep.
***
Percy entered the Burrow with a copied page in his hands. It was neatly folded and stuffed into an envelope, which was just Percy-like.
In his mind he still had the exact words of the document, as if they were burned into his eyes.
Amoratis
In the darkest lands
to the darkest hour
you will find a plant
with amazing power
Just add the red roses' petal
and a Gryffins heart
as well as draconis' powder for a start
Then make it bowl for the time of a day
and then leave it like that for a while
To exactly enchant the right persons heart
add some of the blood that flew through them
and after that you'll need to speak this spell
'I bond you to me
Your heart is mine
you can never break free
until the end of time'
And this will do
A humans soul belongs to you.
You have to face a honest love
which you might not return though
And now chose wisely and decide well,
because there's no known way
to break such a spell
It may lead to war and violence as well as to love
and it may also bring death and loathe.
***
Please review! You know you want to! *grin*.
Yours Lady Alekto