I have failed. I was wrong. We didn't understand. I don't know how much
longer I can hold out. My sense of self is nearly gone, and I am becoming
become just another part of us it, I can still think, though we think it
won't be I I I damn it, I think it won't be much longer until We NO are
complete we wrong pray to my god but he doesn't hear us WRONG. If only he
We are complete. WE ARE COMPLETE.
-- Final entry from the personal journal of James Trenton, October 19th, 1678
A cry went up, of rage, and pain, as the breach was sealed, but another opened near it, darkness spilling onto the ground. A group of demons fell on it, ripping and tearing, before it could take shape. But in places it still rose up, becoming more solid, taking the form of massive barbed monsters that began killing anything that came near. The group of demon defenders scattered, trying to avoid the claws and teeth of the shadows (as they thought of them), but many died, the shadow beasts tearing them apart, and consuming the gory pieces, some of which still moved. Bolts of fire and energy poured onto the area, cleansing shadow and demon alike, until the concentrated power sealed the rift.
Another cry went up, this one of victory, as no more rifts appeared. Groups of robed demons moved among the wounded and dying, killing without mercy those who showed the shadow taint, and those that asked that their pain be ended. A tall, gaunt demon without eyes was led on a chain, sniffing at the air, before barking something that might have been speech to the one who led it. "It has gone," the holder of the chain said, a man who bore ritualistic tattoos over all of his exposed flesh. He turned, and looked at the battlefield, taking pleasure in the suffering he saw.
The pleasure he felt didn't last, for he knew the battle was not truly over. He found he looked forward to the next battle with a mix of anticipation and fear. He jerked the chain roughly, the creature at the end squealing in pain, and walked towards the ramshackle camp that had been constructed for the battle.
Above the field, numerous eyes blinked in unison, as a thousand voices whispered in satisfaction.
---
Buffy stretched, preparing for another session of combat training with Spike. The night after their mutual visitation, and the workings of their friend Tara, had been restful, as neither had dreamed. They had spent the day together, sparring, as Tara and Willow researched the being they had encountered.
Spike was admonishing Buffy again for letting her guard down when he had feigned an injury, when Willow rushed into the room. "Giles found something," she said, nearly out of breath. Spike released Buffy's arm, and she rubbed it, casting a hurt look toward her sparring partner.
"He's on the phone now," Willow said.
---
"I hope that whatever it is that contacted you isn't the same thing I read about," Giles said, taking his glasses off and rubbing his eyes. He'd spent the night in the Watcher library, reading every scrap he could find that referenced the being Buffy had described to him. Her description had been bolstered by Tara, who had seen through darkness, thanks to the residual effects of the seeing spell she had cast.
"As far back as I can go, there are references to the primordial chaos," he said into the phone, replacing his glasses and reading from a sheaf of papers, "it apparently is older than any other living thing, older even than the dimensions that exist now. There are records dating back to before the birth of Christ speaking of the battles that took place when it stirred. It sleeps for thousands of years at a time, but never fully wakes up. Even mostly asleep, it appears to be incredibly powerful."
"And you think that's what we saw last night?" Buffy asked, the worry apparent in her voice.
"What? No, no, but I'm getting around to that." Giles searched the desktop, finding the sheet of parchment he was searching for underneath the journal that had prompted him to make the call. "This chaos being usually manifests as random cataclysms, not always in our world. But there have been times when the creature woke up enough to breach the dimensional barriers. Only twice before has it entered our dimension."
"The first was described in records left by the Egyptians, dating back roughly 5000 years. The transcription made by the Council describes a battle against 'the consuming darkness'. Details are sketchy, but the battle was only won when a being of light, but touched by darkness, sacrificed himself. He sealed the portal, but was left," he paused, searching for the exact passage on the sheet he held, "'forever tainted, walking the earth as a creature of shadow'. The records referred to this being as Anubis."
"Hey, that name sounds familiar. Wasn't he the god of the dead?" Buffy said.
"That's correct, Anubis was the Egyptian lord of the dead," Giles said. "Whether this was the actual being we ascribe the name to is unclear. However, I have further records that that are slightly clearer about the primordial chaos, and possibly about your visitor."
"Around 500 B.C., there are records of a battle in eastern Europe against Chernobog, a Slavic deity associated with chaos, death and darkness. The descriptions match those given in the Egyptian text, but also speak of 'shadow given form', and the creation of an army of upier. An upier is a creature of Polish legend that reportedly had a barbed tongue, and required massive quantities of blood in order to exist. The Council considers this another name for a vampire, but in this case, a researcher has suggested that these beings were actually created from the substance of the chaos being. I believe they are the same creatures you saw in your dreams, but I can't be completely certain."
"Wonderful," Spike said, an involuntary shudder running through him as he thought back to the nightmares.
"Anyway, the record also speaks of Belobog, who was the opposite of Chernobog, a god of light and life, battling against the darkness. He was unable to defeat it, until he merged with Baba Yaga, a death goddess known for devouring men whole. Again, this new being was forced to sacrifice itself in order to finally defeat the chaos."
Buffy turned to Spike, a look of horror dawning on her face. "The link," she said, low enough that she knew only he could hear her. He glanced at her, but made no other movement, his face remaining passive.
"Wait," Willow said, pulling the phone closer to her. "I thought you said that you had more information about the, um, visitor."
"I think I do. And I hate to say it, but on this, the records are quite complete, having been witnessed by several members of the Council. The records are actually fairly extensive, but in summary, a group of Watchers took it upon themselves to attempt the destruction of a creature that matches the description you've given me exactly. It was discovered while investigating rumors of mass possession in east Africa. Together, they managed to work a spell that seemed to force it out of the people, creating 'a cloud of pure darkness that looked upon us with many eyes, and cursed us in many voices'. However, the creature tricked them, and infected them all as well. A few managed to fight it, to keep it from taking over completely, but the effort drove them mad. Eventually, they were," Giles paused. "You'll have to forgive me, but the records become fragmented at this point. One of them, a chronicler for the Council, continued writing up until the time he lost his inner battle with the thing, but he was quite mad, and his writing is difficult to read. From what I can gather, all of them were assimilated into the being, as were all the people it had possessed in Africa. If it wasn't madness speaking, but knowledge gained from the creature itself, this being is almost as old as the primordial chaos itself."
"But," Giles said quickly, "it doesn't sound like either you or Spike were infected by it."
Buffy laughed, the sound bitter, and said, "No. But I think I know why it created the link now."
---
They spent another hour on the phone with Giles, before hitting a button to end the call. Giles had decided it best not to go to the Council, but instead made plans with them to catch a plane back to Sunnydale. Further plans were made after that, and as soon as Buffy was sure everyone knew their part, they split up. Buffy walked with Spike back to his crypt, both of them silent the entire way.
When they made it inside, they sat, but continued the silence, staring at eachother. Spike was the first to speak, "It makes sense. Doesn't make it any easier, but it does explain the changes in both of us over the past week."
Both of them remembered the dreams, the increase in understanding between them, and the changes in both that had allowed them to truly become friends.
"In a way, I'm glad," Buffy said, the hint of a smile touching the corners of her mouth. That smile was quickly replaced with sadness, though, and she said "And in a way, it makes me sick. That it had to happen like this."
"I'm sorry, Buffy," Spike said, moving to sit next to her. He looked at her, and put his arm around her. "I would have done anything to stop it. You know that, right?"
Buffy laughed, "Actually, I do. I'm just realising how much I know about you now, Spike. And you know, if you weren't right about us before," she stopped, and looked at him, "you are now."
"What do you mean?" he asked.
"You are a part of me. Now and forever."
---
It was dark, but the moonlight that filtered in through the window of her room cast enough light for her to see. Cold air poured from the window, and she could almost imagine seeing it, like a waterfall, running down the wall and across the floor. She pulled the blanket more tightly about her, and wished again she understood everything that was happening to her.
More than that, though, she wished Spike was with her.
---
Spike lay awake in his crypt, thinking about Buffy, and wishing for the hundredth time that things hadn't happened the way they did. He thought about all the things he had done to her, said to her, and regretted those things that had caused her pain. He also thought about the others he had hurt, and guilt overwhelmed him. He rose, tears coming involuntarily to his eyes, and thought of all the lives he had ended, all the pain he had inflicted. He got dressed, deciding that a walk would do him good, and set out into the night.
His thoughts turned to Buffy again as he walked, and he managed to smile.
---
She rolled onto her side, staring out the window, as she felt the tears stain her pillow. Silent sobs wracked her, and she closed her eyes.
"Buffy," a voice said, and she opened her eyes to see him sitting on her windowsill. He walked to her, sitting next to her on the bed, and touched her shoulder gently.
"William," she said, wrapping her arms around him. She looked up at him, and he wiped her tears away. Slowly, he leaned toward her. She moved closer to him, and their lips met, as his hand slid down her back.
Spike broke the kiss, and looking at her tenderly, he said, "Are you sure?"
In answer, she sat up, and kissed him again, more passionately this time, as she pulled his duster off. They slowly undressed, kissing, caressing, until they lay naked, side by side, slowly exploring eachother's bodies.
Buffy closed her eyes again, and whispered "Complete me."
They made love, and something flowed between them. Together, they felt passion, and need, their feelings merging, rising. And together, they cried out, their voices becoming one.
---
Buffy awoke to find herself still sitting in the chair in Spike's crypt. She yawned, and smiled, the events of the dream coming back to her. She looked down, and found herself fully clothed, and laughed at herself for expecting to see otherwise. She turned, and found Spike looking at her from the couch.
"Um, Buffy," he said, as he sat up.
The smile slipped away as she saw the look of longing in his eyes, and realised it was the same look he had had in the dream. "Are you sure?" His words came back to her, and she closed her eyes, feeling the kiss again.
"It wasn't just a dream, was it?" she asked.
---
Two who had decided that they were only friends became lovers again, but this time, outside their dreams.
A dark, malicious being watched the end of another battle, and again reached out, touching each of the survivors, destroying their minds before drawing them into itself.
And chaos itself felt pleasure as its children fed upon both the living and the dead.
---
Notes:
I hope no one finds the history lesson on deities of the world boring, but I was tired of the Whedonverse tactic of making up names for beings of power. I also thought it gave the story a nice resonance, by grounding it in actual mythology. I also hope that the final scene moves the reader as much as it did the writer *grin*
-- Final entry from the personal journal of James Trenton, October 19th, 1678
A cry went up, of rage, and pain, as the breach was sealed, but another opened near it, darkness spilling onto the ground. A group of demons fell on it, ripping and tearing, before it could take shape. But in places it still rose up, becoming more solid, taking the form of massive barbed monsters that began killing anything that came near. The group of demon defenders scattered, trying to avoid the claws and teeth of the shadows (as they thought of them), but many died, the shadow beasts tearing them apart, and consuming the gory pieces, some of which still moved. Bolts of fire and energy poured onto the area, cleansing shadow and demon alike, until the concentrated power sealed the rift.
Another cry went up, this one of victory, as no more rifts appeared. Groups of robed demons moved among the wounded and dying, killing without mercy those who showed the shadow taint, and those that asked that their pain be ended. A tall, gaunt demon without eyes was led on a chain, sniffing at the air, before barking something that might have been speech to the one who led it. "It has gone," the holder of the chain said, a man who bore ritualistic tattoos over all of his exposed flesh. He turned, and looked at the battlefield, taking pleasure in the suffering he saw.
The pleasure he felt didn't last, for he knew the battle was not truly over. He found he looked forward to the next battle with a mix of anticipation and fear. He jerked the chain roughly, the creature at the end squealing in pain, and walked towards the ramshackle camp that had been constructed for the battle.
Above the field, numerous eyes blinked in unison, as a thousand voices whispered in satisfaction.
---
Buffy stretched, preparing for another session of combat training with Spike. The night after their mutual visitation, and the workings of their friend Tara, had been restful, as neither had dreamed. They had spent the day together, sparring, as Tara and Willow researched the being they had encountered.
Spike was admonishing Buffy again for letting her guard down when he had feigned an injury, when Willow rushed into the room. "Giles found something," she said, nearly out of breath. Spike released Buffy's arm, and she rubbed it, casting a hurt look toward her sparring partner.
"He's on the phone now," Willow said.
---
"I hope that whatever it is that contacted you isn't the same thing I read about," Giles said, taking his glasses off and rubbing his eyes. He'd spent the night in the Watcher library, reading every scrap he could find that referenced the being Buffy had described to him. Her description had been bolstered by Tara, who had seen through darkness, thanks to the residual effects of the seeing spell she had cast.
"As far back as I can go, there are references to the primordial chaos," he said into the phone, replacing his glasses and reading from a sheaf of papers, "it apparently is older than any other living thing, older even than the dimensions that exist now. There are records dating back to before the birth of Christ speaking of the battles that took place when it stirred. It sleeps for thousands of years at a time, but never fully wakes up. Even mostly asleep, it appears to be incredibly powerful."
"And you think that's what we saw last night?" Buffy asked, the worry apparent in her voice.
"What? No, no, but I'm getting around to that." Giles searched the desktop, finding the sheet of parchment he was searching for underneath the journal that had prompted him to make the call. "This chaos being usually manifests as random cataclysms, not always in our world. But there have been times when the creature woke up enough to breach the dimensional barriers. Only twice before has it entered our dimension."
"The first was described in records left by the Egyptians, dating back roughly 5000 years. The transcription made by the Council describes a battle against 'the consuming darkness'. Details are sketchy, but the battle was only won when a being of light, but touched by darkness, sacrificed himself. He sealed the portal, but was left," he paused, searching for the exact passage on the sheet he held, "'forever tainted, walking the earth as a creature of shadow'. The records referred to this being as Anubis."
"Hey, that name sounds familiar. Wasn't he the god of the dead?" Buffy said.
"That's correct, Anubis was the Egyptian lord of the dead," Giles said. "Whether this was the actual being we ascribe the name to is unclear. However, I have further records that that are slightly clearer about the primordial chaos, and possibly about your visitor."
"Around 500 B.C., there are records of a battle in eastern Europe against Chernobog, a Slavic deity associated with chaos, death and darkness. The descriptions match those given in the Egyptian text, but also speak of 'shadow given form', and the creation of an army of upier. An upier is a creature of Polish legend that reportedly had a barbed tongue, and required massive quantities of blood in order to exist. The Council considers this another name for a vampire, but in this case, a researcher has suggested that these beings were actually created from the substance of the chaos being. I believe they are the same creatures you saw in your dreams, but I can't be completely certain."
"Wonderful," Spike said, an involuntary shudder running through him as he thought back to the nightmares.
"Anyway, the record also speaks of Belobog, who was the opposite of Chernobog, a god of light and life, battling against the darkness. He was unable to defeat it, until he merged with Baba Yaga, a death goddess known for devouring men whole. Again, this new being was forced to sacrifice itself in order to finally defeat the chaos."
Buffy turned to Spike, a look of horror dawning on her face. "The link," she said, low enough that she knew only he could hear her. He glanced at her, but made no other movement, his face remaining passive.
"Wait," Willow said, pulling the phone closer to her. "I thought you said that you had more information about the, um, visitor."
"I think I do. And I hate to say it, but on this, the records are quite complete, having been witnessed by several members of the Council. The records are actually fairly extensive, but in summary, a group of Watchers took it upon themselves to attempt the destruction of a creature that matches the description you've given me exactly. It was discovered while investigating rumors of mass possession in east Africa. Together, they managed to work a spell that seemed to force it out of the people, creating 'a cloud of pure darkness that looked upon us with many eyes, and cursed us in many voices'. However, the creature tricked them, and infected them all as well. A few managed to fight it, to keep it from taking over completely, but the effort drove them mad. Eventually, they were," Giles paused. "You'll have to forgive me, but the records become fragmented at this point. One of them, a chronicler for the Council, continued writing up until the time he lost his inner battle with the thing, but he was quite mad, and his writing is difficult to read. From what I can gather, all of them were assimilated into the being, as were all the people it had possessed in Africa. If it wasn't madness speaking, but knowledge gained from the creature itself, this being is almost as old as the primordial chaos itself."
"But," Giles said quickly, "it doesn't sound like either you or Spike were infected by it."
Buffy laughed, the sound bitter, and said, "No. But I think I know why it created the link now."
---
They spent another hour on the phone with Giles, before hitting a button to end the call. Giles had decided it best not to go to the Council, but instead made plans with them to catch a plane back to Sunnydale. Further plans were made after that, and as soon as Buffy was sure everyone knew their part, they split up. Buffy walked with Spike back to his crypt, both of them silent the entire way.
When they made it inside, they sat, but continued the silence, staring at eachother. Spike was the first to speak, "It makes sense. Doesn't make it any easier, but it does explain the changes in both of us over the past week."
Both of them remembered the dreams, the increase in understanding between them, and the changes in both that had allowed them to truly become friends.
"In a way, I'm glad," Buffy said, the hint of a smile touching the corners of her mouth. That smile was quickly replaced with sadness, though, and she said "And in a way, it makes me sick. That it had to happen like this."
"I'm sorry, Buffy," Spike said, moving to sit next to her. He looked at her, and put his arm around her. "I would have done anything to stop it. You know that, right?"
Buffy laughed, "Actually, I do. I'm just realising how much I know about you now, Spike. And you know, if you weren't right about us before," she stopped, and looked at him, "you are now."
"What do you mean?" he asked.
"You are a part of me. Now and forever."
---
It was dark, but the moonlight that filtered in through the window of her room cast enough light for her to see. Cold air poured from the window, and she could almost imagine seeing it, like a waterfall, running down the wall and across the floor. She pulled the blanket more tightly about her, and wished again she understood everything that was happening to her.
More than that, though, she wished Spike was with her.
---
Spike lay awake in his crypt, thinking about Buffy, and wishing for the hundredth time that things hadn't happened the way they did. He thought about all the things he had done to her, said to her, and regretted those things that had caused her pain. He also thought about the others he had hurt, and guilt overwhelmed him. He rose, tears coming involuntarily to his eyes, and thought of all the lives he had ended, all the pain he had inflicted. He got dressed, deciding that a walk would do him good, and set out into the night.
His thoughts turned to Buffy again as he walked, and he managed to smile.
---
She rolled onto her side, staring out the window, as she felt the tears stain her pillow. Silent sobs wracked her, and she closed her eyes.
"Buffy," a voice said, and she opened her eyes to see him sitting on her windowsill. He walked to her, sitting next to her on the bed, and touched her shoulder gently.
"William," she said, wrapping her arms around him. She looked up at him, and he wiped her tears away. Slowly, he leaned toward her. She moved closer to him, and their lips met, as his hand slid down her back.
Spike broke the kiss, and looking at her tenderly, he said, "Are you sure?"
In answer, she sat up, and kissed him again, more passionately this time, as she pulled his duster off. They slowly undressed, kissing, caressing, until they lay naked, side by side, slowly exploring eachother's bodies.
Buffy closed her eyes again, and whispered "Complete me."
They made love, and something flowed between them. Together, they felt passion, and need, their feelings merging, rising. And together, they cried out, their voices becoming one.
---
Buffy awoke to find herself still sitting in the chair in Spike's crypt. She yawned, and smiled, the events of the dream coming back to her. She looked down, and found herself fully clothed, and laughed at herself for expecting to see otherwise. She turned, and found Spike looking at her from the couch.
"Um, Buffy," he said, as he sat up.
The smile slipped away as she saw the look of longing in his eyes, and realised it was the same look he had had in the dream. "Are you sure?" His words came back to her, and she closed her eyes, feeling the kiss again.
"It wasn't just a dream, was it?" she asked.
---
Two who had decided that they were only friends became lovers again, but this time, outside their dreams.
A dark, malicious being watched the end of another battle, and again reached out, touching each of the survivors, destroying their minds before drawing them into itself.
And chaos itself felt pleasure as its children fed upon both the living and the dead.
---
Notes:
I hope no one finds the history lesson on deities of the world boring, but I was tired of the Whedonverse tactic of making up names for beings of power. I also thought it gave the story a nice resonance, by grounding it in actual mythology. I also hope that the final scene moves the reader as much as it did the writer *grin*