They all stared at me as I stood there with Shippo in my arms. I blinked, not knowing what was wrong or what had happened. I knew that Sesshomaru had taken me here and I remembered our, er, 'conversation' about the battle looming on the horizon over the fate of the Western Lands and Inu Yasha's declaration of our incompatibility. But I didn't know why my friends were staring at me with pity, like I was broken or dying. "What?" I demanded and watched them all become embarrassed.
In my arms Shippo was nodding at Miroku and Sango, the two looking at Inu Yasha s if they'd kill him. Kaede's expression was carefully neutral, carefully blank as if she were hiding without physically doing so. Inu Yasha would not look at me and Sesshomaru shrugged a bare movement of his shoulders. I frowned, looking at them all in confusion.
"Now what happened?" I asked. "Shippo, why are you crying?" I had glanced down at the kitsune out of habit and there were tears in his eyes. They ran down his cheeks as I watched in alarm. "No don't cry! What happened? What's wrong?" I looked at everyone and they only wore those pitying expressions. I soothed Shippo absently, looking at the old priestess for information. "Kaede, what hap-" I was cut off abruptly by a sharp snapping sound.
The leashes snapped and the dogs bounded forward, knocking me backwards and making me loose Shippo mid-flight. The kitsune went one way and I went the other. I slammed into the wooden floor and lay there stunned for a few seconds while two white furry bodies of muscle licked and sniffed me. Knowing that trying to shove them away would prove useless, I lay there, eyes closed and passive, letting them do as they would.
"Kagome?" My hands twitched and rubbed the dogs' bellies. The happy furballs barked happily and lay down, one directly on top of me unfortunately, and the other lay down by my side. I opened my eyes and arranged the dog's hindquarters so they weren't digging into my sore belly. I blinked up into concerned gold eyes, partially blocked by a wagging tail.
"Lady Kagome, are you all right?" I moved my head and saw a worried Miroku.
You are unharmed? The thought made me pause and look in Sesshomaru's direction. The youkai was pointedly ignoring me but at least he had asked. I answered truthfully. Yah, but I'm really tired- and that was before I got tackled! He didn't say anything but he growled, making the dog on top of me climb off and lay down beside me on my free side. I used both hands, one for each, to pet both animals.
Sango offered me a hand up. I shook my head. "I'll just stay here. I was going to go to sleep anyway since no one will tell me anything." I saw her wince and felt guilty. Inu Yasha frowned and disappeared from view. I didn't hunt for him; I could hear him riffling through my pack. Damn it! I struggled to sit up, wincing and putting a hand to my belly when I crushed the healing bruise. For my efforts I got my sleeping bag shoved in my face and the hanyou storming out the door after muttering something that sounded like a death threat for Sesshomaru if he touched me.
One by one, my traveling companions followed Inu Yasha out of the hut, mumbling excuses about going to find him. Kaede, Sesshomaru, the dogs and I were the only ones left in the hut. I held my sleeping bag and didn't know what to do. My brain finally engaged and I began standing up. I had to go find them and find out why they were they acting like someone had died!
"Kagome, it would be unwise to push yourself any further, especially in your condition." Kaede said and I blinked, unsure of what she was saying. It was true that I had taken a beating and was tired but I still wanted to go and find Inu Yasha-not to mention be clued in. "It would be wise to leave the others alone for a while. Come, you can sleep in my room. I'll stay out here and talk to them." My brain stalled.
I looked at Sesshomaru. Do you know what's going on? He arched an eyebrow at me, his face blank.
Yes, but the priestess is right; go rest your body, wench. You'll be no help to anyone if you are too tired to stand. He was right and that was the most annoying part. I knew it and he knew it; I got the impression he was smiling inside, a quiet cheer for his minor victory. Don't get too cocky. I told him and headed after Kaede. I pulled Inu Yasha's coat off and laid it over my bag when I passed it, disappearing through the scant rug that partitioned the two rooms. I laid out my sleeping roll and crawled in, not bothering to change- not with Sesshomaru so close by. I half curled, unable to get comfy. The dogs joined me shortly after I entered, laying down on either side of me. I smiled and fell asleep scratching behind their ears.
Inu Yasha ripped up another tree. He had left the hut and stomped off to his forest to wash off the god awful stench clinging to him. He couldn't think straight with it on, his moods swinging violently from one extreme to the other. He couldn't concentrate on anything for long; his thoughts chased each other round and round his head, making him very confused.
Kagome had smelled different this morning- that was true. She had smelled attractive, wonderful, but not her normal scent. The hanyou folded his arms in the water as he tried to think things out. Kagome couldn't be his mate, couldn't be pregnant. But Sesshomaru wouldn't lie- be irritating, annoying and down right the brother from hell, but the youkai had honor and this was where Sesshomaru drew the line. By all rights, he should have killed Kagome- she had been a thorn in his side forever- so there had to have been a very good reason that prevented Sesshomaru from doing so.
Inu Yasha frowned. Wasn't there was a formal ceremony involved for mates... and something about biting? Damn, he thought. It's been so long since I had to remember any of this court crap. Sesshomaru would know but the hanyou didn't want to ask his brother about it right now. Probably tell me everything but about what I want to know- if he didn't out right attack me. In a way, it was a shame that the brothers' relationship had deteriorated so much; it made the hanyou's life that much lonelier.
As much as he didn't want to admit it, Inu Yasha really needed a friend to talk things over with and the only one he could think of was Kagome. The hanyou thought about the events of the past week, about the night of the new moon- the night something important had happened that he couldn't remember but Inu Yasha suspected that Kagome knew about. He had wanted to ask her about it repeatedly but something inside him was afraid, afraid that she would lie or deny it. He smashed the water's reflective surface. The missing piece of the puzzle was what it was.
Inu Yasha climbed out of the water, shivering slightly in the chill air. He shook himself vigorously, getting rid of the water that coated his skin and soaked his hair. He wished he had brought his coat to wash- if the stench wasn't washed away it would set in and then he'd never be rid of it. Dressed and still unhappy, Inu Yasha's thoughts turned toward matters at hand.
As far as the pregnancy was concerned… If she was indeed pregnant, Kagome was not carrying his pups. They had not had sex, so they couldn't be Inu Yasha's; plain and simply. Vague sensations of her skin beneath his hands, moving in an intimate rhythm haunted him. He could feel her body inside and out, smell her sweet scent, and almost see her as she arched her back… Inu Yasha shook his head violently to chase the images away. The whole thing was akin to a wonderful fantasy- or a very good dream.
His claws bit into his palms as he looked around the woods. No- they had never had sex in reality. He would have smelled it the moment she conceived, but… Doubt wormed its way into his heart, feeding the budding feeling of betrayal growing there. But Kagome had smelled different in her bedroom. His thoughts kept returning to that point, as if it had infinite importance. So, Kagome had to have had slept with someone; a lady did not get pregnant out of thin air. That only meant the father was someone else that she had seen or met in the week she was in her time. That revelation hurt the most; Inu Yasha felt betrayed, felt his heart ache. It mad him even angrier and he slammed his fists into the trunk of the nearest tree.
That tree was followed by several. Inu Yasha didn't just hit them with his fists; he used his claws and incredible strength to tear them to pieces. Each act of violence only fed his rage, making it grow like some angry beast inside his chest- where his heart used to be. Kikyo had betrayed him, sealed him into sleep, and now she gave him mixed messages about her feelings toward him. The shell of grave dirt and bones that housed the hating heart of Kikyo that was her in a way but at the same time not… Those hands had alternately tried to kill him and had held him close in a gentle embrace. It hurt him to think that he had to kill her but he also felt relief that she would be at peace once he destroyed her body.
That didn't mean he wanted to go down that path if he had to, however.
And now Kagome had done the same! He cared for the woman, loved her in a way, and it hurt him to think about this new awful event. Kagome had pledged loyalty to him but had succumbed to another's touch. She had betrayed him and it stirred up the beast of rage inside him as he called on more and more of his demon heritage. He demolished another tree, his fifth, and tossed it over his shoulder to join the growing pile. It surprised him, distantly, that the more he demolished, the stronger he was becoming. It distressed him and he finally sat down on the piled remains of the trees he had destroyed.
Maybe they were just too different. His claws continued to clench and unclench as he thought that through. Separated by almost five hundred years and linked together by a quest and a well, he thought grimly. As naive as his thinking was, he had always thought that Kagome would stay with him. She had put up with a lot of abuse from him and the past week hadn't helped matters. Maybe, he swallowed thickly. Maybe she finally got tired of waiting, of being yelled at, and that's why she… why she… He angrily scrubbed at his face as he felt tears fall. He wouldn't cry. He wouldn't! He rubbed harder at his eyes. Inu Yasha felt alone, abandoned, and smashed his fists into the trees underneath him angrily, trying to make the feelings go away.
.
Sango and Miroku found him that way, smashing the poor trees to splinters without realizing it. The priest cleared his throat, making Inu Yasha look up at the two, noticing them for the first time. His anger was evident on his face and made the two step back, unsure of what to say; they didn't know if consoling him would make him angrier or calmer. They tried anyway with a neutral opener, trying to ease his pain even when they were thinking along the same lines as the hanyou.
"Now Inu Yasha…" Miroku began, trying to be positive. Though he was a bit annoyed with the hanyou, the monk had to admit he was jealous- out of all of them, Miroku had thought he had the best shot of getting anywhere with the ladies.
"Sesshomaru's just being mean!" Sango said fiercely, but her voice wavered with uncertainty at the end.
Inu Yasha looked down at them and he radiated rage. He leapt down and snarled at the two, running at top speed back toward the village. He was going to solve this once and for all. He'd make Kagome tell him who she had slept with, who she had betrayed him for. I bet it was that Hoho guy, or one of her 'friends' from school! The thoughts only made him run faster, only fed his rage. How many men did Kagome know, how many could she have slept with? Inu Yasha scented the air- his nose was working again and he was glad. It was time to see what the truth was, be it good or bad.
He entered the small hut like a barely contained storm of violence. His energy was so much that it awoke Sesshomaru, who had fallen asleep again when Kagome had. The youkai silently sent a thought to Kagome that woke her from her dream and alerted the girl to Inu Yasha's presence- and his mood. Kagome woke fully, thanked Sesshomaru, and lay still, pretending to still be asleep.
Inu Yasha walked in a straight line to Kaede's bedroom. The old priestess was shoved across the room when she tried to stop him. Inu Yasha ignored her and pushed the door flap away, exposing Kagome's sleeping form.
I could feel every step Inu Yasha took as he crossed into the tiny room. I kept my eyes closed and focused on controlling my heart rate. He either didn't care or I did a great imitation of sleeping because he pulled the top of my sleeping bag down. His anger bit along my skin and frightened me. To hide this I rolled over, from my back onto my right side, away from him. The dogs had disappeared for the time being but I'd have to go find them later- after I dealt with this idiot.
Lay passive and let him do what he wants. Sesshomaru ordered in my head. His tone made me bite back my angry retort. I knew he and Kaede were in the doorway, ready to jump Inu Yasha if he tried to hurt me. I did as I was told, playing rag doll when Inu Yasha roughly rolled me back and pulled at my overalls. My acting ability was sorely tested when he shredded the straps- he couldn't get the hooks undone- and pulled the clothing down. He sniffed me; bringing his face close to my skin and making my hair stand up. I tried to roll over, to my left this time, and toward the doorway and safety but he pushed me back down on my back; the hanyou also kept a hand on my shoulder to keep me pinned. Uh oh.
He finally stopped sniffing when he got to my belly. He poked my stomach, hesitantly laying his entire palm against it, and then pushing on the area hard. Now I couldn't ignore him anymore; I slapped his hands away, curled into a ball while on my back, and put my legs between his claws and my body. He pulled his hand back in surprise and shook with fury.
"It's true then." The hanyou said, his voice tight. I had never heard him so angry. What the hell? What was he talking about? I opened my mouth to ask and his hand came down. It stopped a few inches from my face and I stared at it in fear. Suddenly there was a lot of shouting and barking from the other room. The noise distracted Inu Yasha and allowed me the time to think, to move. I kicked out with both legs and hit him in the upper body. As soon as he stumbled back I rolled off the bed and dived for the door.
I was hit from the right and my left side slammed the wall. I felt something crunch inside, pain as an accompaniment. With the pain my power flared and I used it, directing it into a barrier between me and the enraged hanyou. Safe within my shield, I watched Inu Yasha hit it with his fists, trying his best to pop my bubble. I let myself lay on the floor and spit blood, wondering what he had hurt. I watched the others pour into the room, too late to be of any real help, and drag Inu Yasha back. They were losing, being tossed around like dolls- even Sesshomaru-, and I screamed "Sit!" Inu Yasha obediently smashed into the ground and stayed there. Everyone backed off as Inu Yasha started to rise to his feet. I sat him again and again when he got up afterwards. I climbed to my feet and my barrier faded. I leaned against the wall and watched the hanyou rise slowly as well. Sango and Miroku came over to me, watching me like they'd never seen me before.
My patience had reached its limits. I stood there, blood running from my mouth, and ground out, "I have been beaten up, have out competed an Olympic athlete in lifting, and been attacked by one of my best friends." My voice had started out quiet and had increased in volume, reaching maximum on the last. "Someone tell me what the hell is going on and what is wrong with Inu Yasha!" I coughed and winced. Pain seemed to be coming from somewhere inside but I couldn't pinpoint its source- from my lower sternum to my waist; everything was a massive belt of pain. My chest area hurt the most aside from my stomach. Unconsciously, my hand slid down and covered the lower region as well as held up my pants. I rubbed my chest as I waited for an answer. Closed my eyes, I winced, feeling myself slide down the wall to the floor. When next I opened them I was being held by Sesshomaru.
What happened? I asked, and even I thought I sounded fuzzy. I had a sense of de ja vu and flashed on the dream that had started this all, reliving the time I had been hurt by the dream eater youkai and Sesshomaru had helped me feel better by licking my wounds. I felt myself blush and laughed mentally. It was funny, though I couldn't say why. I felt giddy, tipsy, and a little sleepy.
Hush, Kagome. Just lie still. Sesshomaru barked. His message was sent with images- images of the lands and people he had shown me earlier in ruins or laid to waste, overrun by a dark force. Sesshomaru didn't care about me; he was concerned for his kingdom. If I was hurt or damaged, I would be unable to help Sesshomaru and that was why he was sharing his power and healing me. I complied, letting him hold me and feeling the pain ease.
"Kagome?" Sango's face appeared, upside down from my point of view. I blinked and focused on her worried expression, the giddiness draining away.
"Where's Inu Yasha?" Threats first, small talk later.
"Out of reach." I nodded and said the magic word. I heard a thump and cursing- Inu Yasha was on the other side of the room.
"Why-" and I coughed, ignoring Sesshomaru's silent orders to shut up and be still. I drew a painful breath and tried again. "What made him crazy?" Someone touched my stomach and I hissed.
She ignored my question and said something that made me stare at her. "Kaede's afraid that you're losing the baby."
"Baby?!" I coughed and tried to right myself. Sesshomaru held me firm and I couldn't sit up and be comfortable. "What baby?" And this time she stared at me.
"You were pregnant when you came back," Sango looked sad and my fuzzy mind began putting things together. "After being…attacked, Kaede thinks that you're losing the child."
"Can't lose what I never had." I said, raising my head and looking down at myself. I couldn't believe this! They were all acting weird because they though I was pregnant? Where did they get such a stupid idea? Inside my head I felt Sesshomaru shift and knew where the stupid idea had come from. I kicked my foot up and hit Sesshomaru in the head. I struggled out of his arms, scrambling away as far as I could. I ended up in a corner, again, and stared at them all.
I spotted Shippo by my bag, the little kitsune not meeting my eyes. "Shippo!" I yelled and he flinched. "The pocket near your foot has a marker in it. It's the fat one. Pull it out and bring it here, please." He hesitated and then did as I asked. I glared at Sesshomaru and slammed a wall inside my head, shutting him out and blocking his power from me. I immediately felt sleepy and the unidentified pain was back, slightly less but still there. I was going to show them what made my stomach swell and if I had the strength afterwards I was gonna yell like hell.
Pulling my shirt up a bit and pushing the remains of my overalls down, I showed them my stomach. The area was indeed swollen, but discolored in a strange pattern. I pulled the cap off the marker with my teeth, holding the top there while I traced the pattern. They all watched me with interest, especially Inu Yasha. I replaced the cap, finished, and glared at them all, finally locking eyes with the hanyou.
"It is a boot imprint!" I shouted, and indeed the discolored area was shaped like a boot. It was the imprint of one of the hiking boots the leader of that idiotic girl gang of Hojo worshippers had worn. When she had kicked me it had left a massive bruise. I toed off one of my own shoe and matched the heel of it and the heel of the imprint together. "I was in a fight earlier and got kicked low in the stomach!" Now that show and tell was over, I put my clothes back the way they had been and chucked the shoe as hard as I could at the open mouthed Inu Yasha. It was vindictive, true, but also satisfying when it hit him in the head. I threw the marker at Sesshomaru who unfortunately caught the damn thing.
"The area is swollen," I continued slowly for the rest of the assembly, turning my attention on them all. "Because it's filled with healing fluids that are repairing all the damage! I am not pregnant and never was!" I slumped back against the wall, closing my eyes, too disgusted with the people around me. I coughed and felt more blood slip between my lips. "You idiots… Stupid, stupid idiots…" I mumbled and passed out.