chapter 2: Buffys secrets
Buffy watched as Ezra hit and kicked the Punching bag. She was strong, but her methods were reckless. Wild. Just like faith had been Buffy thought to herself. The more Buffy got to know Ezra the more she resembled Faith. Her expressions, her movements, her attitude.
She had even called her B once. Buffy asked her not to, saying that she hated that designation. Ezra just called her Buff now. It made Buffy cringe, but it was better then B.
It had been three days since Ezra had come. And three days since Buffy had seen Spike. The sun had set an hour ago on sunny dale. The magic shop was quiet. The air set heavy, as if stale. It made Buffy sick to her stomach.
Ezra continued to beat away at the punching bag. Dawn sat in the front of the shop with Xander and Willow. Dawn was angry with Willow still. Her arm hurt and she was tired. But she knew that Willow was really sorry, and she saw that Willow was serious about giving it up.
Willow was sad. The power had filled her. It ran through her veins with her blood. She felt empty, hollow with out it. But the pain of the magic, the destruction it had caused, it hadn't been worth it.
Ezra continued to hit the punching bag. Randomly throwing kicks and punches. Xander watched Willow with concern. She was reading a book on the addiction of magic. to bad that hadn't been around before Xander thought to himself.
He looked over at Dawn. She was doing her homework. Every now and then she looked up at Willow, her expression emotionless. Xander wondered if Dawn would ever forgive Willow. He thought she would, but he knew it would take time.
Ezra was still beating the punching bag. "Oh look" a cocky male British voice said, "it's a bitty slayer" the voice said again.
Buffy looked up at the voice of Spike. He had come in through the back, and was standing in the shadows. "Oh look" Ezra said as she stopped hitting the punching bag, "It's a neutered vampire" she finished. Spike glared at her, and she returned the glare with equal strength. "Well, I'd love to stay and chat with one such as your self, but I think I'm ready for a water break" Ezra said. She picked up her water and went into the front of the shop.
"What do you want?" Buffy said as she stood up and began hitting the punching bag. She figured that if she just kept hitting the bag, then Spikes words couldn't reach her.
He came up behind her and put his hands on her shoulders, running the down her arms, stilling her movements. He put his lips near her ear and whispered, "I'm just here to see how everyone is doing."
Buffy leaned back into him and moved her head so her lips were inches away from his. "That's very kind of you, but we're all fine, so you can go" she said, and elbowed him in his ribcage. He stumbled backwards.
"Ya know what?" Spike said, "I'm tired of this. I'm always following you around, making sure your okay, but does anyone ever ask if I'm okay? No" Buffy rolled her eyes at him. "I wasn't joking Summers, I'm tired of being your whipping boy, and I may be concerned about the way your treating your body, but that doesn't mean I'm just taking back everything I said" he said.
"Then leave. You keep on saying your done playing this game, but you keep coming back for another round" she said moving towards him.
He moved towards her meeting each other half way, "Well, when the woman I love is cutting herself I get a little concerned" he said.
Buffy cringed at his words. They were standing close now, too close. There faces were inches away. "You said that already" she said. Back away Buffy" she told herself back away before it's too late. She threw her arms around his neck and started kissing him. He responded by putting his arms around her waist, and pushing her against the wall.
Xander looked at the Small red head, who was chatting away with Dawn. She was so young. How could she be so young, yet still have the weight of the world on her shoulders. Buffy had been that young He remembered. Had she really been that young. Had she ever been as innocent as this young girl who stood before them giggling with Dawn. It seemed so long ago.
Xander went to the back of the magic shop to talk to Buffy. "Buf-" he started to say Buffys name, but stopped as her saw them. Spike was kissing Buffy and she was kissing him back. Neither of them seemed to notice his presence, so he quickly turned around and left.
"eww eww eww eww eww' he said over and over to himself as he walked back to the front of the magic shop. "Somebody pleeeaaassee tell me that the Buffy bot was fixed" he said.
Willow, Anya, Dawn, and Ezra all looked up at him. "Not that I know of" Willow said confused, "Why?" she asked. They all looked at him waiting for an explanation.
"Okay" Xander started, "Brace yourselves for this, it's a big one"
Spike pulled away from Buffy, "I knew you couldn't stay a way, you crave me like I crave blood" he said, then started kissing her again.
Buffy turned her head away, and moved out of his grasp. "Oh my god" she said disgusted with him. "Let us get one thing strait. I do NOT crave you. I never have and I never will".
"Oh yeah" he said, "Well what was that all about?" he crossed his arms over his chest and looked at her waiting for an answer.
"Temporary insanity" she replied, "Now go before someone comes in ands sees us together" she said.
Spike walked up and put his hand behind her neck and pulled her to him. She looked away. "You'll see Buffy, you'll see" he said, and left.
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"So, you and the slayer" Spike looked up at the voice, "William the bloody, and Buffy summers" Spike looked for the person the voice was coming from. Ezra walked out of the shadows. "It's so strange, a vampire loving a slayer" she taunted him.
"What do you want, and what are you blabbing on about, me and Buffy are just friends" he said.
"Ha!" Ezra said. "everyone knows, you guys might not want to make out in the practice room when everyone is at the magic shop" she said. "By the way, I expect Xander will be trying to kill you soon" she smirked.
Spike was stunned, but quickly recovered, "What is your problem?, I never did anything to you" he said.
"your a vampire" she said distracted, she blinked, and wavered on her feet a little as if dizzy, "I'm a... slayer... what more reason....." she moaned in pain and put her arm around her stomach. "Voices" she said. she bent slightly over and clutched her head, "they talk.
"What's wrong with you" Spike asked. She didn't reply. He walked over to her and put his ands on her shoulders. He leaned down and back looking at her face. She had a crazed look on her face. A look Spike knew well. Drucila used to get the same look when she would get a vision. "Ezra, pet, what is it" he said. Drucila may of been insane, but her visions almost were always accurate.
She shook her head and stepped out of his grasp "I'm not your pet" she said. She looked up at him, the look was off her face and she looked like a normal girl again. "I just had a little head ache" she said. "I have to go" she turned and ran away from him.
Spike went back to his crypt and went down stairs, and grabbed his flask and took a big long drink.
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The room went silent as Buffy entered, a bottle of water in hand. They all had grim expressions on their faces. Willow coughed and looked away. Dawn looked up at her and smiled, "Ezra just left for home, I think I'll go see if I can catch up with her" Dawn said, and left before Buffy could respond.
Buffy smiled at them, "So, what's up guys?" she asked.
"Buffy" Xander said, "Are you, ya know, feeling okay. Do you have a fever, are you maybe a little delirious" he walked over to her and put his hand on her forehead.
"Xander" Buffy said and pulled away from his hand laughing slightly at him, "I feal fine, though you might want to get checked out".
"Well" Willow said "Did you maybe like hit your head, like really hard"
"No, by the way, you guys didn't happen to like take a bunch of crazy pills did you?" Buffy asked smiling.
"No" Xander said, But I think you may have. I saw you in the practice room with Spike" he told her, with a serious look on his face.
"Oh that" Buffy said "Well that wasn't what it looked like" she explained.
"Oh? good because it looked allot like you were kissing Spike" Xander said.
"You know what?" Buffy said, "I did hit my head. Ow ow ow, you know I think I'm gonna go home and lie down. My judgment is obviously being effected" she said trying to cover up.
They didn't buy it, "Buffy" Willow said gently, I know your having a hard time and all bu-"
"No" Buffy cut her off, "You don't know. You all think you do but you don't. Now just everyone leave me alone. This is my life and I will live it however I want" she ran out of the magic shop.
"Well" Willow said sarcastically, "That went well".
"Did you guys ever think that maybe we should just leave her alone?" Anya said. "I mean, she's 21, she can live her own life. I'm not saying I approve of the whole Buffy Spike thing, but, I mean, she's having a hard enough time as it is. He apparently can comfort her, we can't" she reasoned.
"No" Xander said sternly, "Buffy does not need Spike, she needs us. Her friends." he looked at Anya. She shook her head and went back to reading her bridal magazine.
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Buffy ran, letting the night air seep into her pours and comfort her. Her feet pounded the ground, one after the other. This could not be happening. They couldn't know. Damn Spike
She thought to herself.
Her hair flew out behind her back. Her feet were aching from running in her heals. But she kept running. She didn't know where she was, or where she was going. She only knew that she wasn't going home. She couldn't.
The night surrounded her, taking her in it's embrace. She looked up at the stars that blurred around her as she ran. She felt the darkness welcoming her like a warm blanket. Rain began to pour from the clouds above her. She opened her mouth welcoming the water.
She continued to run. Her hair no loner flew out behind her back, but was now wet, and stuck to her skin. She was beginning to feal cold. She had on her sweat pants and a small white tank top. Her clothes were soaked through and through. Her foot slid on the mud, and she fell face down. She sat up, covered in mud, and looked around her. She was at the grave yard.
She laid back down on the ground. She sank into the bed of mud and closed her eyes.
"Well well well" an all to familiar voice said. "What is the slayer doing rolled in mud right in front of my crypt at this late hour?" he asked.
Buffy moaned and rolled up into a fetal position in the mud. "Go away and leave me alone Spike" she told him.
Spike crouched down and put a hand on her shoulder, she was ice cold, "Common pet, time to get you inside" he said. She shook her head. "Now now luv" he said as he picked her up, "I don't think your friends would care to much for a wet mud covered Buffy" he said. He carried her into his crypt.
Buffy rested her head against Spike chest and listened to the steady rise and fall of his chest. It was so strange. A vampire that breathes, But Spike was quite unusual. He ate regular food, he smoker, her drank stuff that wasn't blood. He wrote poetry, and he fell in love. Such weird behavior for a vampire Buffy thought to herself. She blinked her eyes a few times and fell into the welcoming world of sleep.
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Buffy spun around in circles, her long skirt flying around her body. Her hair whipped across her face, daisies braided through it. She started to feal dizzy you she let herself fall onto the soft green grass that padded the ground.
But she didn't hit the grass, she hit a ground covered in mud, and shot back to her senses. Buffy sat up and opened her eyes, taking in her surroundings. She was in a bed. It was dark, and dank where she was. She looked down at what she was wearing. A black T-shirt. A black T-shirt that looked strangely familiar.
She looked next to her and there he was, sleeping. She stuck out her hand and flicked his forehead with her finger. He squeezed his eyes tightly shut for a moment then looked up at her. "Why am I here?" she asked annoyed.
"Gee Spike, thank you for taking care of me" he said in a high voice, "Oh no need to thank me, that's just the kind of guy I am" he said in a normal voice. "But surely Spike" he said up in the higher voice again, "There must be some way I can thank you, something I could do maybe some-"
Buffy cut him off, "Let's see, I wake up in the middle of the night, in nothing but one of your dirty shirts on and you want me to thank you? I'd rather take my chances in the mud" she said.
"Do you always wake up in bad moods?" he asked her.
"Only when I wake up next to you Spike" she said. "It's all for you".
"I feal so lucky. Listen pet, It's cold out there, and I didn't think you would fancy waking up in the mud, or in your bed, with your friends, since our little nasty secret is out now" he said.
Buffy made a disgusted look. "Where are my clothes?" she asked him annoyed.
"Over there, are you leaving?" he asked.
She looked at him, opening her mouth to tell him how yes, she would be leaving, and insult him in the process, but the look on his face stopped her. That and the thought of going home to questions she couldn't answer didn't exactly appeal to her at the moment. He looked at her, his blue eyes sparkling, is pink lips parted slightly. His bleached blond hair ruffled slightly with sleep. She reached out and smoothed back his hair, "No, I'll stay. But don't read to much into it. I just don't want to face Willow and Xander yet." she told him.
She laid back down in the bed. "I don't suppose you have a clock of some sort anywhere" she asked.
"No, sorry, but it's still hours before dawn" he told her.
Dawn she shouldn't be staying, Dawn might worry. "I really shouldn't be leaving Dawn home" she said to Spike.
"I'm sure the whole scooby gang is at your house right now. Besides, Ezra's there, she can take care of things for one night." he said.
Buffy nodded. Spike was right. Dawn could handle herself for one night. She closed her eyes. She had one hell of a head ache. "Have any form of aspirin?" she asked him hopefully.
"When you drink like I do, you have to have something to get rid of hang overs" he said smiling at her.
She smiled back. He reached over to the night stand and opened the drawer, grabbed a bottle of excedrin and tossed it to her. He passed her a bottle of water that had been on his night stand.
"Thanks" she said and took two of the small white pills. She laid back down, letting her head sink into the pillows. She looked up at the 'ceiling'. She closed her eyes, trying to block everything out. The air was filed with the scent of Spike. She breathed deeply in.
Spike put a hand on her stomach, being ready to pull away if she wanted him to, but she let him. She welcomed him. He laid his head in the space where her neck met her shoulders, and they both just laid there, and went back to sleep.
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Buffy laid on the soft green field, in a peaceful state of calm. Ezra approached her, wearing a long blue dress. The red waves of her hair was braided behind her back. She carried an object that kept on changing shape. At one moment it was a wolf, then a puppy. Then it would be a bear, then it would change into a red rose, which would turn black, then change into a kitten.
"How long are you going to hide?" Ezra asked her.
"Until their gone" Buffy answered her. She tried to ignore Ezra, hoping she would go away.
She didn't. Her hair fell out of the braid and shortened turning brown. She grew a couple inches taller, and her face changed. Buffy looked at Faith now. "They'll never leave B, you have to face them.
"I'm not ready yet" she said, "It's nice here, I want to stay here, with you. I never see you anymore, I worry".
"Yeah well I'm a busy girl, but you don't need to worry anymore, I've got a nice little set up here. I'm five by five" faith said. She sat down next to Buffy. "You should go though, Dawn comes early, and wont understand night" she said.
"Your probably right" Buffy said, but it's so nice here there no demons to fight, and no one questions me. except for you of course"
Faith laughed. "Well, I'm not gonna make you leave" she said.
Buffy sat up in bed, waking up Spike in the process. "I have to go, she wont understand" Buffy said.
"What? who wont understand" Spike asked, trying to shake of sleep.
As If to answer that they herd Dawn calling for Buffy upstairs. "Oh no" Buffy said. "Where are my clothes, she can't see us like this"
"Buffy" Dawn called again.
"But we were just sleeping" Spike said.
"Well it wont look like that to Dawn" she said.
Dawn climbed down the ladder that led to the bottom part of Spikes crypt. Buffy hadn't come home last night and she was worried. "Spike Buffys missing" she said and turned around.
She stared at the sight before her. Buffy was in bed with Spike wearing one of his T-shirts. She was sitting up and Spike was laying down. "Dawn" Buffy said, "This isn't what it looks like, we were just sleeping" Buffy explained.
"Right" Dawn said. "Just sleeping, how stupid do you think I am. Were you with him the last weak too. You know, I worry about you when you don't call, so next time your just out boinking your boy friend, give me a call so I know your safe" Dawn screamed at her.
"Dawnie, we were only sleeping I swear. I didn't want to have to explain my actions to Xander and willow so I hid" she said, "It was weak I know, and I should of called you. I'm sorry" she gave Dawn her best innocent look.
Spike had been quiet the whole time, but now he chose to talk, "Niblet, Buffy's a big girl, she doesn't need to explain her actions to anyone. Not even you" he said. He was disgusted at the sight of Buffy explaining herself to her kid sister. If she wanted to stay out all night, then no one should be able to stop her.
Dawn glared at him. Spike didn't get it. Dawn liked him, why was she reacting so horribly. He had thought that she at least would be okay with the arrangement. She held her injured arm to her chest.
"Dawn go wait upstairs. I'll be up in a minute and we'll go home. I'll even make you eggs" Buffy tried to appeal to Dawn. She turned around and went up the ladder that led to the top of Spikes crypt.
Buffy put her hands over her face and moaned, "Great, this is just great" she said. "Anyone else, and I could of yelled at them to leave me own and let me make my own mistakes but not Dawn" she said.
"Mistake?" Spike said.
"Yes. A very big mistake" she said. She got up and went over to her clothes and put them on. "I'm keeping your shirt by the way" she said. "Mines not in any shape to be worn. My pants are bad enough." she said.
"Hey, I only have so many shirts" he said. "That one was my favorite".
"Oh come on. You probably have a closet full of black T-shirts. And they all look exactly the same" she said annoyed at him. She left before he could respond.
Spike laid back down in bed. She'll come around He told himself. He was still worried about her though. Her behavior wasn't healthy. And her friends probably weren't helping either, telling her how to live her life.
He closed his eyes and went back to sleep. He could think about it latter.
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Ezra laid down on the couch. Her head was humming with noise. She could here everyone in the house. She could hear what they were thinking. She could usually shut it out, but she was to tired.
Besides, it was always interesting to hear peoples thoughts. Willow was trying not to think about magic, and Tara, but her thoughts kept going back to them. She was filled with sadness. Ezra wished she could do something to make her feal better, but she didn't think anything she said would be helpful.
Dawn was thinking about Willow, Buffy and Spike. She wanted to forgive Willow, but didn't know if she could. She was mad at Buffy for not telling her about Spike. She would of understood. She was fond of Spike, and felt hurt that Buffy would keep their relationship a secret from her sister.
Ezra laughed at that. If she only knew why Buffy didn't tell. Buffy didn't even think of it as a 'relationship', she thought of it as a sick addiction. She listened to Buffys thoughts. Buffy was thinking of Spike. Big surprise Ezra thought to herself. Buffy was confused. She was upset that he always knew what she was thinking. She was also upset because no mater how hard she tried she couldn't stop thinking about him. She wanted him near her. She wanted him to-
Ezra cut off her link to Buffys mind. Some things she just didn't want to hear. She sat up. Her head ache was going away. She grabbed her coat, well Dawns coat and left the house. She wasn't wanting to spend the evening shut up in a house where thoughts were running so wildly.
She wandered the streets for a while, looking for a demon or something to fight. Her skin was crawling. She needed to work out energy. Her keen slayer senses picked up the sound of foot steps behind her. She turned around and went into a ready to attack position.
It was him again. She hated him, he reminded her of Aaron, the way he moved, the way he talked, every thing. She almost came to tears at the thought of Aaron. Since she thought of any of her people.
She shook her head. She didn't want to think about them. "Following me?" she asked glaring at him.
"Right" he said, "Like I have nothing better to do then follow a 15 year old girl" he glared right back at her.
Ezra suddenly bent over in pain. She clutched her head. The thoughts of people all around her started flowing through her mind. She felt as though they were all ramming into one part of her brain. It was like a knife stabbing her head over and over again. The pain was unbearable.
Spike gently put his hands one her shoulders. "Ezra, are you okay?" he asked.
She tried to respond, but only meaningless words came out. She fell forwards against him. She tried shaking her head to make it stop, as she had done earlier. Nothing was working.
At last she resorted to her last option. She had been blocking him for so long now, but she new that if She called upon his mind he could help her. She reached out with her mind, looking for the familiar feal of him, and called 'Aaron' .
Her mind was immediately connected to his and her pain began to go away. She regained her footing and stepped back from Spike, who had been supporting her. Though her pain was relived, her anxiety grew. She had let Aaron back in, which meant he would find her in a matter of hours. She knew he was in sunny dale, she had felt his presence there for days now.
Hiding from her past would no longer be easy. She would have to tell them. They would cast her out, as her people had. She would be forced to go into darkness with Aaron, and her life would never be safe again.
Already she felt his presence grow nearer. 'no' she cried out to him.
'You cant hide from them the truth' his voice said in her mind. The moment she heard it she wanted him to be with her. She wanted him to take her in his arms and make the pain stop. 'and you cant hid from me for long' his voice said. She could almost see the cocky grin on his face.
She looked up at Spike, who was looking down at her worried. "Take me back to Buffy's" she demanded. He nodded, and began to help her along on the side walk. Her strength was low at the moment and she knew that she wouldn't be able to make it to Buffys by herself.
end of chapter 2.
Buffy watched as Ezra hit and kicked the Punching bag. She was strong, but her methods were reckless. Wild. Just like faith had been Buffy thought to herself. The more Buffy got to know Ezra the more she resembled Faith. Her expressions, her movements, her attitude.
She had even called her B once. Buffy asked her not to, saying that she hated that designation. Ezra just called her Buff now. It made Buffy cringe, but it was better then B.
It had been three days since Ezra had come. And three days since Buffy had seen Spike. The sun had set an hour ago on sunny dale. The magic shop was quiet. The air set heavy, as if stale. It made Buffy sick to her stomach.
Ezra continued to beat away at the punching bag. Dawn sat in the front of the shop with Xander and Willow. Dawn was angry with Willow still. Her arm hurt and she was tired. But she knew that Willow was really sorry, and she saw that Willow was serious about giving it up.
Willow was sad. The power had filled her. It ran through her veins with her blood. She felt empty, hollow with out it. But the pain of the magic, the destruction it had caused, it hadn't been worth it.
Ezra continued to hit the punching bag. Randomly throwing kicks and punches. Xander watched Willow with concern. She was reading a book on the addiction of magic. to bad that hadn't been around before Xander thought to himself.
He looked over at Dawn. She was doing her homework. Every now and then she looked up at Willow, her expression emotionless. Xander wondered if Dawn would ever forgive Willow. He thought she would, but he knew it would take time.
Ezra was still beating the punching bag. "Oh look" a cocky male British voice said, "it's a bitty slayer" the voice said again.
Buffy looked up at the voice of Spike. He had come in through the back, and was standing in the shadows. "Oh look" Ezra said as she stopped hitting the punching bag, "It's a neutered vampire" she finished. Spike glared at her, and she returned the glare with equal strength. "Well, I'd love to stay and chat with one such as your self, but I think I'm ready for a water break" Ezra said. She picked up her water and went into the front of the shop.
"What do you want?" Buffy said as she stood up and began hitting the punching bag. She figured that if she just kept hitting the bag, then Spikes words couldn't reach her.
He came up behind her and put his hands on her shoulders, running the down her arms, stilling her movements. He put his lips near her ear and whispered, "I'm just here to see how everyone is doing."
Buffy leaned back into him and moved her head so her lips were inches away from his. "That's very kind of you, but we're all fine, so you can go" she said, and elbowed him in his ribcage. He stumbled backwards.
"Ya know what?" Spike said, "I'm tired of this. I'm always following you around, making sure your okay, but does anyone ever ask if I'm okay? No" Buffy rolled her eyes at him. "I wasn't joking Summers, I'm tired of being your whipping boy, and I may be concerned about the way your treating your body, but that doesn't mean I'm just taking back everything I said" he said.
"Then leave. You keep on saying your done playing this game, but you keep coming back for another round" she said moving towards him.
He moved towards her meeting each other half way, "Well, when the woman I love is cutting herself I get a little concerned" he said.
Buffy cringed at his words. They were standing close now, too close. There faces were inches away. "You said that already" she said. Back away Buffy" she told herself back away before it's too late. She threw her arms around his neck and started kissing him. He responded by putting his arms around her waist, and pushing her against the wall.
Xander looked at the Small red head, who was chatting away with Dawn. She was so young. How could she be so young, yet still have the weight of the world on her shoulders. Buffy had been that young He remembered. Had she really been that young. Had she ever been as innocent as this young girl who stood before them giggling with Dawn. It seemed so long ago.
Xander went to the back of the magic shop to talk to Buffy. "Buf-" he started to say Buffys name, but stopped as her saw them. Spike was kissing Buffy and she was kissing him back. Neither of them seemed to notice his presence, so he quickly turned around and left.
"eww eww eww eww eww' he said over and over to himself as he walked back to the front of the magic shop. "Somebody pleeeaaassee tell me that the Buffy bot was fixed" he said.
Willow, Anya, Dawn, and Ezra all looked up at him. "Not that I know of" Willow said confused, "Why?" she asked. They all looked at him waiting for an explanation.
"Okay" Xander started, "Brace yourselves for this, it's a big one"
Spike pulled away from Buffy, "I knew you couldn't stay a way, you crave me like I crave blood" he said, then started kissing her again.
Buffy turned her head away, and moved out of his grasp. "Oh my god" she said disgusted with him. "Let us get one thing strait. I do NOT crave you. I never have and I never will".
"Oh yeah" he said, "Well what was that all about?" he crossed his arms over his chest and looked at her waiting for an answer.
"Temporary insanity" she replied, "Now go before someone comes in ands sees us together" she said.
Spike walked up and put his hand behind her neck and pulled her to him. She looked away. "You'll see Buffy, you'll see" he said, and left.
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"So, you and the slayer" Spike looked up at the voice, "William the bloody, and Buffy summers" Spike looked for the person the voice was coming from. Ezra walked out of the shadows. "It's so strange, a vampire loving a slayer" she taunted him.
"What do you want, and what are you blabbing on about, me and Buffy are just friends" he said.
"Ha!" Ezra said. "everyone knows, you guys might not want to make out in the practice room when everyone is at the magic shop" she said. "By the way, I expect Xander will be trying to kill you soon" she smirked.
Spike was stunned, but quickly recovered, "What is your problem?, I never did anything to you" he said.
"your a vampire" she said distracted, she blinked, and wavered on her feet a little as if dizzy, "I'm a... slayer... what more reason....." she moaned in pain and put her arm around her stomach. "Voices" she said. she bent slightly over and clutched her head, "they talk.
"What's wrong with you" Spike asked. She didn't reply. He walked over to her and put his ands on her shoulders. He leaned down and back looking at her face. She had a crazed look on her face. A look Spike knew well. Drucila used to get the same look when she would get a vision. "Ezra, pet, what is it" he said. Drucila may of been insane, but her visions almost were always accurate.
She shook her head and stepped out of his grasp "I'm not your pet" she said. She looked up at him, the look was off her face and she looked like a normal girl again. "I just had a little head ache" she said. "I have to go" she turned and ran away from him.
Spike went back to his crypt and went down stairs, and grabbed his flask and took a big long drink.
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The room went silent as Buffy entered, a bottle of water in hand. They all had grim expressions on their faces. Willow coughed and looked away. Dawn looked up at her and smiled, "Ezra just left for home, I think I'll go see if I can catch up with her" Dawn said, and left before Buffy could respond.
Buffy smiled at them, "So, what's up guys?" she asked.
"Buffy" Xander said, "Are you, ya know, feeling okay. Do you have a fever, are you maybe a little delirious" he walked over to her and put his hand on her forehead.
"Xander" Buffy said and pulled away from his hand laughing slightly at him, "I feal fine, though you might want to get checked out".
"Well" Willow said "Did you maybe like hit your head, like really hard"
"No, by the way, you guys didn't happen to like take a bunch of crazy pills did you?" Buffy asked smiling.
"No" Xander said, But I think you may have. I saw you in the practice room with Spike" he told her, with a serious look on his face.
"Oh that" Buffy said "Well that wasn't what it looked like" she explained.
"Oh? good because it looked allot like you were kissing Spike" Xander said.
"You know what?" Buffy said, "I did hit my head. Ow ow ow, you know I think I'm gonna go home and lie down. My judgment is obviously being effected" she said trying to cover up.
They didn't buy it, "Buffy" Willow said gently, I know your having a hard time and all bu-"
"No" Buffy cut her off, "You don't know. You all think you do but you don't. Now just everyone leave me alone. This is my life and I will live it however I want" she ran out of the magic shop.
"Well" Willow said sarcastically, "That went well".
"Did you guys ever think that maybe we should just leave her alone?" Anya said. "I mean, she's 21, she can live her own life. I'm not saying I approve of the whole Buffy Spike thing, but, I mean, she's having a hard enough time as it is. He apparently can comfort her, we can't" she reasoned.
"No" Xander said sternly, "Buffy does not need Spike, she needs us. Her friends." he looked at Anya. She shook her head and went back to reading her bridal magazine.
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Buffy ran, letting the night air seep into her pours and comfort her. Her feet pounded the ground, one after the other. This could not be happening. They couldn't know. Damn Spike
She thought to herself.
Her hair flew out behind her back. Her feet were aching from running in her heals. But she kept running. She didn't know where she was, or where she was going. She only knew that she wasn't going home. She couldn't.
The night surrounded her, taking her in it's embrace. She looked up at the stars that blurred around her as she ran. She felt the darkness welcoming her like a warm blanket. Rain began to pour from the clouds above her. She opened her mouth welcoming the water.
She continued to run. Her hair no loner flew out behind her back, but was now wet, and stuck to her skin. She was beginning to feal cold. She had on her sweat pants and a small white tank top. Her clothes were soaked through and through. Her foot slid on the mud, and she fell face down. She sat up, covered in mud, and looked around her. She was at the grave yard.
She laid back down on the ground. She sank into the bed of mud and closed her eyes.
"Well well well" an all to familiar voice said. "What is the slayer doing rolled in mud right in front of my crypt at this late hour?" he asked.
Buffy moaned and rolled up into a fetal position in the mud. "Go away and leave me alone Spike" she told him.
Spike crouched down and put a hand on her shoulder, she was ice cold, "Common pet, time to get you inside" he said. She shook her head. "Now now luv" he said as he picked her up, "I don't think your friends would care to much for a wet mud covered Buffy" he said. He carried her into his crypt.
Buffy rested her head against Spike chest and listened to the steady rise and fall of his chest. It was so strange. A vampire that breathes, But Spike was quite unusual. He ate regular food, he smoker, her drank stuff that wasn't blood. He wrote poetry, and he fell in love. Such weird behavior for a vampire Buffy thought to herself. She blinked her eyes a few times and fell into the welcoming world of sleep.
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Buffy spun around in circles, her long skirt flying around her body. Her hair whipped across her face, daisies braided through it. She started to feal dizzy you she let herself fall onto the soft green grass that padded the ground.
But she didn't hit the grass, she hit a ground covered in mud, and shot back to her senses. Buffy sat up and opened her eyes, taking in her surroundings. She was in a bed. It was dark, and dank where she was. She looked down at what she was wearing. A black T-shirt. A black T-shirt that looked strangely familiar.
She looked next to her and there he was, sleeping. She stuck out her hand and flicked his forehead with her finger. He squeezed his eyes tightly shut for a moment then looked up at her. "Why am I here?" she asked annoyed.
"Gee Spike, thank you for taking care of me" he said in a high voice, "Oh no need to thank me, that's just the kind of guy I am" he said in a normal voice. "But surely Spike" he said up in the higher voice again, "There must be some way I can thank you, something I could do maybe some-"
Buffy cut him off, "Let's see, I wake up in the middle of the night, in nothing but one of your dirty shirts on and you want me to thank you? I'd rather take my chances in the mud" she said.
"Do you always wake up in bad moods?" he asked her.
"Only when I wake up next to you Spike" she said. "It's all for you".
"I feal so lucky. Listen pet, It's cold out there, and I didn't think you would fancy waking up in the mud, or in your bed, with your friends, since our little nasty secret is out now" he said.
Buffy made a disgusted look. "Where are my clothes?" she asked him annoyed.
"Over there, are you leaving?" he asked.
She looked at him, opening her mouth to tell him how yes, she would be leaving, and insult him in the process, but the look on his face stopped her. That and the thought of going home to questions she couldn't answer didn't exactly appeal to her at the moment. He looked at her, his blue eyes sparkling, is pink lips parted slightly. His bleached blond hair ruffled slightly with sleep. She reached out and smoothed back his hair, "No, I'll stay. But don't read to much into it. I just don't want to face Willow and Xander yet." she told him.
She laid back down in the bed. "I don't suppose you have a clock of some sort anywhere" she asked.
"No, sorry, but it's still hours before dawn" he told her.
Dawn she shouldn't be staying, Dawn might worry. "I really shouldn't be leaving Dawn home" she said to Spike.
"I'm sure the whole scooby gang is at your house right now. Besides, Ezra's there, she can take care of things for one night." he said.
Buffy nodded. Spike was right. Dawn could handle herself for one night. She closed her eyes. She had one hell of a head ache. "Have any form of aspirin?" she asked him hopefully.
"When you drink like I do, you have to have something to get rid of hang overs" he said smiling at her.
She smiled back. He reached over to the night stand and opened the drawer, grabbed a bottle of excedrin and tossed it to her. He passed her a bottle of water that had been on his night stand.
"Thanks" she said and took two of the small white pills. She laid back down, letting her head sink into the pillows. She looked up at the 'ceiling'. She closed her eyes, trying to block everything out. The air was filed with the scent of Spike. She breathed deeply in.
Spike put a hand on her stomach, being ready to pull away if she wanted him to, but she let him. She welcomed him. He laid his head in the space where her neck met her shoulders, and they both just laid there, and went back to sleep.
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Buffy laid on the soft green field, in a peaceful state of calm. Ezra approached her, wearing a long blue dress. The red waves of her hair was braided behind her back. She carried an object that kept on changing shape. At one moment it was a wolf, then a puppy. Then it would be a bear, then it would change into a red rose, which would turn black, then change into a kitten.
"How long are you going to hide?" Ezra asked her.
"Until their gone" Buffy answered her. She tried to ignore Ezra, hoping she would go away.
She didn't. Her hair fell out of the braid and shortened turning brown. She grew a couple inches taller, and her face changed. Buffy looked at Faith now. "They'll never leave B, you have to face them.
"I'm not ready yet" she said, "It's nice here, I want to stay here, with you. I never see you anymore, I worry".
"Yeah well I'm a busy girl, but you don't need to worry anymore, I've got a nice little set up here. I'm five by five" faith said. She sat down next to Buffy. "You should go though, Dawn comes early, and wont understand night" she said.
"Your probably right" Buffy said, but it's so nice here there no demons to fight, and no one questions me. except for you of course"
Faith laughed. "Well, I'm not gonna make you leave" she said.
Buffy sat up in bed, waking up Spike in the process. "I have to go, she wont understand" Buffy said.
"What? who wont understand" Spike asked, trying to shake of sleep.
As If to answer that they herd Dawn calling for Buffy upstairs. "Oh no" Buffy said. "Where are my clothes, she can't see us like this"
"Buffy" Dawn called again.
"But we were just sleeping" Spike said.
"Well it wont look like that to Dawn" she said.
Dawn climbed down the ladder that led to the bottom part of Spikes crypt. Buffy hadn't come home last night and she was worried. "Spike Buffys missing" she said and turned around.
She stared at the sight before her. Buffy was in bed with Spike wearing one of his T-shirts. She was sitting up and Spike was laying down. "Dawn" Buffy said, "This isn't what it looks like, we were just sleeping" Buffy explained.
"Right" Dawn said. "Just sleeping, how stupid do you think I am. Were you with him the last weak too. You know, I worry about you when you don't call, so next time your just out boinking your boy friend, give me a call so I know your safe" Dawn screamed at her.
"Dawnie, we were only sleeping I swear. I didn't want to have to explain my actions to Xander and willow so I hid" she said, "It was weak I know, and I should of called you. I'm sorry" she gave Dawn her best innocent look.
Spike had been quiet the whole time, but now he chose to talk, "Niblet, Buffy's a big girl, she doesn't need to explain her actions to anyone. Not even you" he said. He was disgusted at the sight of Buffy explaining herself to her kid sister. If she wanted to stay out all night, then no one should be able to stop her.
Dawn glared at him. Spike didn't get it. Dawn liked him, why was she reacting so horribly. He had thought that she at least would be okay with the arrangement. She held her injured arm to her chest.
"Dawn go wait upstairs. I'll be up in a minute and we'll go home. I'll even make you eggs" Buffy tried to appeal to Dawn. She turned around and went up the ladder that led to the top of Spikes crypt.
Buffy put her hands over her face and moaned, "Great, this is just great" she said. "Anyone else, and I could of yelled at them to leave me own and let me make my own mistakes but not Dawn" she said.
"Mistake?" Spike said.
"Yes. A very big mistake" she said. She got up and went over to her clothes and put them on. "I'm keeping your shirt by the way" she said. "Mines not in any shape to be worn. My pants are bad enough." she said.
"Hey, I only have so many shirts" he said. "That one was my favorite".
"Oh come on. You probably have a closet full of black T-shirts. And they all look exactly the same" she said annoyed at him. She left before he could respond.
Spike laid back down in bed. She'll come around He told himself. He was still worried about her though. Her behavior wasn't healthy. And her friends probably weren't helping either, telling her how to live her life.
He closed his eyes and went back to sleep. He could think about it latter.
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Ezra laid down on the couch. Her head was humming with noise. She could here everyone in the house. She could hear what they were thinking. She could usually shut it out, but she was to tired.
Besides, it was always interesting to hear peoples thoughts. Willow was trying not to think about magic, and Tara, but her thoughts kept going back to them. She was filled with sadness. Ezra wished she could do something to make her feal better, but she didn't think anything she said would be helpful.
Dawn was thinking about Willow, Buffy and Spike. She wanted to forgive Willow, but didn't know if she could. She was mad at Buffy for not telling her about Spike. She would of understood. She was fond of Spike, and felt hurt that Buffy would keep their relationship a secret from her sister.
Ezra laughed at that. If she only knew why Buffy didn't tell. Buffy didn't even think of it as a 'relationship', she thought of it as a sick addiction. She listened to Buffys thoughts. Buffy was thinking of Spike. Big surprise Ezra thought to herself. Buffy was confused. She was upset that he always knew what she was thinking. She was also upset because no mater how hard she tried she couldn't stop thinking about him. She wanted him near her. She wanted him to-
Ezra cut off her link to Buffys mind. Some things she just didn't want to hear. She sat up. Her head ache was going away. She grabbed her coat, well Dawns coat and left the house. She wasn't wanting to spend the evening shut up in a house where thoughts were running so wildly.
She wandered the streets for a while, looking for a demon or something to fight. Her skin was crawling. She needed to work out energy. Her keen slayer senses picked up the sound of foot steps behind her. She turned around and went into a ready to attack position.
It was him again. She hated him, he reminded her of Aaron, the way he moved, the way he talked, every thing. She almost came to tears at the thought of Aaron. Since she thought of any of her people.
She shook her head. She didn't want to think about them. "Following me?" she asked glaring at him.
"Right" he said, "Like I have nothing better to do then follow a 15 year old girl" he glared right back at her.
Ezra suddenly bent over in pain. She clutched her head. The thoughts of people all around her started flowing through her mind. She felt as though they were all ramming into one part of her brain. It was like a knife stabbing her head over and over again. The pain was unbearable.
Spike gently put his hands one her shoulders. "Ezra, are you okay?" he asked.
She tried to respond, but only meaningless words came out. She fell forwards against him. She tried shaking her head to make it stop, as she had done earlier. Nothing was working.
At last she resorted to her last option. She had been blocking him for so long now, but she new that if She called upon his mind he could help her. She reached out with her mind, looking for the familiar feal of him, and called 'Aaron' .
Her mind was immediately connected to his and her pain began to go away. She regained her footing and stepped back from Spike, who had been supporting her. Though her pain was relived, her anxiety grew. She had let Aaron back in, which meant he would find her in a matter of hours. She knew he was in sunny dale, she had felt his presence there for days now.
Hiding from her past would no longer be easy. She would have to tell them. They would cast her out, as her people had. She would be forced to go into darkness with Aaron, and her life would never be safe again.
Already she felt his presence grow nearer. 'no' she cried out to him.
'You cant hide from them the truth' his voice said in her mind. The moment she heard it she wanted him to be with her. She wanted him to take her in his arms and make the pain stop. 'and you cant hid from me for long' his voice said. She could almost see the cocky grin on his face.
She looked up at Spike, who was looking down at her worried. "Take me back to Buffy's" she demanded. He nodded, and began to help her along on the side walk. Her strength was low at the moment and she knew that she wouldn't be able to make it to Buffys by herself.
end of chapter 2.