The Exposure of Mr. Satan
Mr. Satan was relaxing in his mansion living room, watching his huge screen TV while drinking a glass of Chianti. He laid back on his couch while still being able to see the television, which was displaying the news.
"Ahhh," he thought, "Everything is going so well. I'm rich and famous. After the last World Martial Arts Tournament, I'm going to have more fans than ever. Thanks to my quick pay off to that number 18, I'm still the world champ."
Suddenly, the TV said something that got Mr. Satan's attention.
"Now on to our special report. Mr. Satan is a fraud."
The "world champ" spat out what wine he had in his mouth. "WHAT?!!"
"This discovery was made by news reporter, John Stuple. John?" The TV image switched to another reporter.
"Good evening. I know what most of you are thinking. 'How could Mr. Satan, the one who saved the world from Cell, be a fraud?' Well, tonight, I have some startling proof that would say that he never was a hero."
Mr. Satan quickly grabbed a phone on the couch and speed-dialed the TV station.
"Hello, America to World Broadcast. How may I help you?"
"You have got to turn off that show you are currently broadcasting!" he shouted.
"Sorry, we're on live." The phone hung up. Mr. Satan grimly looked back at the TV.
"We have here some startling footage that will prove what really happened at the Cell Games."
The image then turned into a scene of two huge energy blasts hitting each other. The camera that was taping it honed in on Cell on the left side of the blasts. It panned out and honed in on Gohan on the other side. Again panning out, it moved to the side of the battlefield. Honing in, it showed Mr. Satan cowering behind a rock. The footage stopped for a while and then a scene of a blinding flash came on. After that, it showed young Gohan floating in the air with his hand extended out. It panned over to the side and showed Mr. Satan lying down with the other fighters and TV reporter. Mr. Satan was petrified as he watched the footage showing the world he did not defeat Cell and never doing anything to help. The footage switched back to the reporter and another person.
"This is the man who took that footage. First of all, how did you get it?"
The short, well dressed man said, "I wanted to see and record the Cell Games myself, so I took my camera to the site. After the battle, I found that my tape was damaged. I had it fixed, but I knew no one would believe me if I showed it."
"So, why now just reveal it?"
"After seven years of watching that fake rise, I couldn't stand it anymore. I had to tell the world."
"Ladies and gentlemen," the reporter said, "We have had the tape analyzed by several of the best investigators of the world, and they have concluded that the tape is authentic, never having been altered. So now, we need to ask ourselves, 'what does the champ have to say about this?'"
One of the mansion's butlers walked in. "Master Satan, there are fifty calls from reporters wishing to interview you."
Mr. Satan just kept staring at the TV, bug-eyed.
In the weeks that followed, Mr. Satan laid low from the media. Unfortunately, this brought a wave of doubt with his fans. More and more evidence that he was a fraud came up. Soon enough, accusations were made, ranging from lying to fight fixing. Finally, Videl came to aid him.
"Daddy," she said to her father his room, "you have to tell them the truth."
"What are you talking about? I did defeat Cell! You believe me, don't you?!" He looked at her with hopeful eyes.
"…no."
"WHAT?! You actually believe that a little kid beat Cell?!"
Videl became startled then mad. "You never defeated Cell! Gohan did!"
"Gohan?! Who the fu-, I mean, heck is he?!"
"You don't have to use kid words with me, dad! And for your information, Gohan is the sweetest boy I know and the one who really defeated Cell! Not you! I've known for the longest time!" She walked out of his room.
"What!? Videl, you come back here! Is that the scrawny kid I saw with you at the World Martial Arts Tournament?!"
Nothing answered him.
Mr. Satan walking into the press room and approached the podium. Camera lights were flashing as he readied himself.
"I'll take questions now."
A reporter stood up.
"Mr. Satan, we now know you falsified your accounts of the Cell Games, but suppose you were this Gohan in that event. You are facing the murderous monster that has no regard for human life. The ones you hold dear are being assaulted by his powerful asexual offspring. You try to walk, but the ground is too bloody with your friend's head crushed…"
"What is your question?!"
"My question is about your education background, sir."
"Any relevant questions!?"
Another reporter stood up. "Yes, Mr. Satan, what do you say about the accusation of your last fight in the World Martial Arts Tournament?"
"What do you mean?"
"Well, many are now saying that you paid your competitor, one named Number 18, 20,000,000 zenni to throw the fight."
"I only have one thing to say about that. I did not have fight-fixing relations with that opponent."
It has been several months since Mr. Satan was exposed as a fraud. He has since disappeared; last seen with a fat, pink character named Mr. Buu. In the first bank of what is now called Son City, many people are making usual transactions. Suddenly, three masked people with machine guns busted into the building firing rounds into the air.
"OK! Everyone down!" a tall one said.
The other two spread out on the tall one's command. He walked to one of the tellers and pointed a gun to her head.
"OK! Gimme all you got! And, I ain't taken no funny money!"
Just then, the doors of the bank busted open again, but this time only two characters appeared. One was a fat, pink one with puffy pants and a purple vest and cape. The other was a tall man with a martial arts wardrobe, sunglasses, and a floppy brimmed hat. One part of the brim was buttoned to the hat itself.
"All right!" the one in the sunglasses said, "I am the Great Sapie-man! I go out and defend this city with my sidekick Mr. Buu!"
"Buu! Buu!" the fat one responded.
"Now! Let that poor woman go before I get mad!" the Great Sapie-man demanded.
"What?" another masked robber asked, "Who the hell is this, loser?"
"Loser!? I'll have you know I am the strongest human in the world! Ha ha ha ha! Ha ha!" he said with his mouth gapping open.
"Hey," the third robber said, "Ain't he that washed up dude? Mr. Satin?"
"I am not, in anyway, affiliated with Mr. Satan, although he is my favorite fighter."
"Man! Let's just waste him!"
All three of them pointed there guns to the man in disguise and fired. Mr. Buu, however, dashed in front of the Great Sapie-man and cushioned the bullets with his large stomach. All three robbers became shocked as they rounds they just fired popped out of pink person with a strange antenna coming from the top of his head. Mr. Buu made one swift movement of his gloved hands and the floated to the ceiling.
"OK! Mr. Buu, I can handle it from here," the Sapia-man said to his sidekick.
The hero jump kicked the robber beside the teller, instantly knocking him out. He charged for the other two and, with two swift punches, knocked them out as well. After he made sure they were out, he raised both hands in the air, making a victory sign with each.
"YYYEEEEEAAAHHHHHHHH!"
One of the relieved bankers came to him.
"Oh thank you, Mr. Satan. I know you are labeled as a fraud, but you still have guts."
"What? What are you talking about? I'm not Mr. Satan!"
"Yes you are," another banker rose up and said, "You're trying to copy the Great Saiya-man. Isn't your daughter living with him now?"
"I don't know what you're talking about. With this disguise, nobody can see my real identity. That's me. Identity known to no one, but protector to all! Ha ha ha ha! Ha ha ha !"
"Come one, Mr. Satan. You're obviously trying to blatantly copy the Great Saiya-man with a knock-off costume. And, in my opinion, you look ridiculous in that hat."
"Come one, Mr. Buu," the Great Sapia-man told his sidekick, "Let's get out of here. We have other people to save." Both of them walked out of the bank.
Walking down the street, both of the heros saw people staring at them. As the Great Sapia-man looked at them, he saw a short teenager with an excessive amount gel in his hair. Upon seeing the hero in sunglasses, he widened his eyes and smiled like a sleazy car salesman. He gave the disguised hero two thumbs-up signs.
"Hey, tight out fit!"
After waving to the young man, the Great Sapia-man walked confidently.
"At least one person can't see through my disguise."
THE ENDI hope you have enjoyed the fic. This is my second humor fic, so tell me if I did ok. I do not own DBZ/GT or the Simpsons (the question the first reporter asked was based on a Simpsons' joke). Just your standard legal clause. Blah, blah, blah, yada, yada, yada.