August 18, 2002
"So, Jen." Jack began, conversationally, as they both watched Dawson walk down the ramp that would lead him to his plane.
"So, Jack," she replied.
"Are you going to tell me?"
"Am I going to tell you what?"
"You know full well what I'm talking about." They both waved when Dawson turned around to smiled at them before boarding.
"Why don't you spell it out for me, Jackers?" She tried to laugh off his inquiry as they walked down the concourse toward the exit.
When Jack just looked at her with a raised eyebrow, she said nothing. They took the subway back to their apartment in silence. It wasn't until they were in the little kitchen gathering lunch together that Jack continued.
"Jen," he began tentatively. "You and Dawson shared something special this summer, I'm not asking what that was, but if you want to talk about him or what happened, I'm here for you."
"Jack," she sighed. "I know you are. What happened between Dawson and I was little more than strange circumstances and proximity."
"If you say so. That's not what I saw, but then you've never been one to see what was right in front of you."
"Jack," she said on an exasperated sigh. "What are you talking about?"
"What I'm saying is that, regardless of how it came into being, you and Dawson have a very special bond. Don't let that go. Don't be afraid of it."
Jen stood up from the table taking the two steps to the fridge. She opened the door, looking inside. For what? She couldn't quite remember. She felt panic stinging her throat. Shutting the refrigerator door she turned, empty handed.
"I'm not afraid. Dawson's my friend. One of my best friends. Why would that scare me?" She looked at Jack defiantly, daring him to argue.
"Yes he is. He's one of my best friends too. But I think the two of you could be more."
Suddenly, her throat was dust. She held on to the back of the chair she stood behind until her knuckles were white with tension.
"Jack, that's ridiculous." Her voice shook, betraying her. With a new found resolution, she sat and continued more calmly. "Jack, that's not what I want. That's not what he wants. We're friends. Maybe better friends than before, but just friends."
Jack laughed, "a lot you know about what Dawson wants. That boy's probably more than half in love with you!"
Jen just gave him an icy stare. Jack recognized that the topic was closed and decided to let it drop. He simply shrugged and shifted his attention to lunch.
***
August 25, 2001
Rob looked at Dawson a moment, sitting in front of his computer. He looked tired. He looked frustrated. Actually, he almost looked hurt. Like whatever he was working on caused him pain. It had been that way for the last 5 days. He got back to LA in time to sign the lease on their apartment, then he got behind the computer. Hours each day. Currently, he was leaning back in his desk chair, eyes glazed. Rob couldn't tell if he was staring at the screen or beyond it.
"Hey D, hot Internet romance going on or what?"
Startled, Dawson pressed the keys that brought up his screen saver. He pushed the chair out from the desk to face Rob.
"Jesus, man. You look awful."
"Why thank you for the insight," Dawson drawled in response.
"What have you been doing holed up in here all week. I mean, classes haven't even begun yet."
"I'm working on a screenplay."
"Okay, so why the single minded fervor?"
"I don't know. It seems like every time I try to concentrate on something else I come back to this. It won't let me sleep at night," he sighed and rubbed his hands over his tired face. "I figure I should just let it ride itself out."
"Whatever. What's it about anyway?"
"Ah, it's complicated."
"I think I've just been insulted," he joked. Earning a grin from Dawson. "You don't think I have the sense of the acting majors that you'll use?"
"Nope."
Rob eyed Dawson with suspicion. "Tell me what you really think of me."
"Oh no, Rob, that's not what I meant. It's just... Well, nobody's going to read this one."
"What? Isn't that what you're going to school for? If you aren't going to use it, why spend all this time and energy writing it?"
"Like I said before, I can't help but write. It's like I've got no choice. As for using it, I promised someone very important to me that I wouldn't even write it, let alone turn it in."
"Um-hmm. Well, anyway. I was just coming in to see if you wanted to come out with a bunch of us. Dinner and a movie, your fave?"
"Hey, thanks for the invite, but I'll have to pass. I'm sure this'll let me go eventually, so the sooner I finish it, the sooner I can forget that I wrote it." Dawson gave a weak smile before turning back to face his machine. Rob shrugged and left the room.
What am I doing, Dawson thought as he tipped his head back and stared at the ceiling. Focussing back on the screen he read...
Camera on Tasha, sitting on the edge of the fountain. The surrounding area is overgrown with vegetation. Her arms are folded in her lap as she looks off screen. Eric's voice is heard off screen, but the camera remains on Tasha.
Eric: Ready?
Tasha: Yeah. Okay, so, what's my direction?
Eric: That of longing, incredible sadness. Think about what just happened. The monster you killed is the man you loved. The victim of an experiment gone terribly wrong. Cut. And print.
Tasha: Was that a take cause I can do it again?
Eric: That was amazing.
Tasha: Sadness is my specialty. Should we do it again because..
Eric: It was perfect.
Camera switch to Eric walking toward Tasha, until both are on screen. Eric appears uncomfortable.
Tasha: Well, I had a good director.
Eric: And I had a good actress. So...
Tasha: So..
He groaned, remembering that night. How ironic that he was writing a screen play around he and Jen. Well, actually, a screenplay about Jen that he happened to be in. He'd come a long way from 'Creek Daze'. It was hard to reconcile the boy that he had been to the man he hoped to become. Just remembering how closed minded he had been when he first met Jen was embarrassing. Just the first step into the tragedy that would become high school.