"What are you doing, Sydney?" Vaughn managed. She had pulled away from him, but he could still feel her breath on his sweaty skin. He blinked away Santanic Sydney and her self-fondling tail. "You just nibbled on my ear."
"I, um," Sydney snapped her spine into its most perfect posture. "My neck twitched while I was whispering." She felt the blood rush to her face and cursed herself for coming up with such a lame excuse.
Vaughn raised an eyebrow. "Your neck twitched?"
"That's what I said. Now," Sydney raised her brow and started fondling the buttons on Vaughn's pale blue shirt.
"Will you stop that!" Vaughn ordered, lightly slapping Sydney's persistant hands away.
"But you're sweating. You need to take this off and cool down," Sydney smiled innocently.
"If you would just leave me alone, I would cool down!"
"But I can't leave you alone," she grinned. "Who will protect you from the mean SD-6 men outside?" Sydney innocently batted her doe-eyes. And then she grinned.
Dear God, not that wicked grin again! Vaughn started praying to God, Allah, Buddha... whoever was on duty that day and cared at all about a lowly CIA agent just trying to serve his country.
"Honestly," Sydney's began. "You CIA officers make me sick." She winked, negating the effect of the disgust dripping in her voice. Sydney sidled closer to Vaughn, slowly licking her lips.
Vaughn caught another wiff of Sydney's vanilla scented perfume. Cookies. Alice hated when I ate cookies in bed. Once she even spanked me for it. Spanked me right on my-- "S-Sy-Sydney... you need to step away now. I am not kidding."
Sydney lunged for Vaughn and lapped at his face, lapping from the bottom of his left jaw upwards to his blushing cheek. She snapped back onto her heels just as quickly, batting her deceptively innocent eyes at him.
"You licked my face," he mumbled. Chester used to lick my face. He also used to hump my leg and got the poodle next door pregnant. Doggy style. Vaughn shook away his last thought.
"I'm sorry--I didn't quite catch that?"
"You licked my face." Vaughn's expression was frozen in a state of shock.
"I understand," Sydney sweetly smiled and again batted her eyes.
"No," Vaughn corrected. "No, you don't really. YOU LICKED MY FACE! What are--what the hell is wrong with you? You're making sexual overtures when SD-6 is outside... you licked my face! Does this seem like normal behavior to you?"
Sydney laughed heartily. "But Vaughny--"
"Stop calling me that," he huffed. "Call me Vaughn. Call me Michael. Call me anything but that."
"Okay, Mikey."
He shot an icy look at Sydney. "Also not acceptable. Its Michael Vaughn. Not Mike. Not Mikey. Not Vaughny. Got it?" He arched an expectant brow at his agent.
"Um-hmm." Sydney smiled and tilted her head to the side. "You know, you're kind of cute when you're angry."
Vaughn rolled his eyes. "You really need to get out more."
"Nope, I get out enough with my job, thanks. Now if you'll just hand me your belt--"
"My belt? What do you--"
"I need it," she giggled.
"Oh you need something, alright. But its not my belt." Vaughn blushed as he realized the double meaning of his words. Doesn't matter. Forget about it. "This isn't funny, Sydney. Everything you've done tonight--including licking me--is against CIA protocol. I could lose my job!"
"Bummer for the girls at the office. No more Vaughnylicous eye candy."
"What?"
"Say, I've been wondering something about that CIA protocol." Sydney began matter-of-factly. "Doesn't Langley have anything better to do than issue mandates on dating?"
"No, as a matter of fact they don't."
"Well, it's stupid."
"Langley would disagree. Seems when people date fellow agents, they become emotionally attached and their judgment is impaired. But then you'd know that if you'd have listened to me when I ranted about Dr. Barnette."
"I did listen. I had nothing of value to say in response."
"Since when does the value of your words make a difference?"
Sydney glared at Vaughn. Her gaze wandered down to Vaughn's belt.
"What are you looking at? Dear God, you weren't serious!"
"I have an idea."
"Well it certainly shouldn't involve anything down there!"
Sydney ignored her handler and reached her hand out for the belt. Vaughn slapped at her hands and pushed them away. "There's nothing there--"
"Oh, that's such a shame. And you'd have had such cute children, too."
"NOTHING. THAT. YOU. NEED." Vaughn methodically enunciated.
"I think I can decide what I need, thanks. Wait," Sydney's ears perked towards the door. "What was that?"
Vaughn looked past Sydney to the door and listened. "I don't hear anything," he calmly whispered.
"Well I heard something. Like a door closing."
Vaughn continued focussing on their room's door and intently listening for noises in the distance.
Meanwhile, Sydney grinned wickedly as she reached for his belt. She unbuckled it.
"Sydney!" He yelped.
"Vaughn, you look so--so tense," Sydney began.
Vaughn dropped his head down to look, and snapped back upright. His face flamed read. I can't believe she tricked me like that. "You're dangerously close to making me angry, Sydney."
"Really? I like it when you're angry." She smiled sweetly.
"You don't understand how men process things, Sydney. What you're doing--what you've been doing--creates physical reactions that are extremely difficult to control."
"Physical reactions?" Sydney repeated. "So if I were to undress, throw myself onto the bed, and ask you to make hot stinky monkey love to me, it would only be a physical thing?" She smiled innocently.
"Yes, that's right," Vaughn's voice squeeked as he chased away the mental image of the two of them doing exactly that.
"Well, that's good enough for me," Sydney shrugged. She walked over to the bed and lay across it, lounging seductively on her side. She propped herself up on an elbow and started seductively curling her finger. "Get over here, Vaughny," she beckoned.
Danger Will Robinson. Danger. Vaughn was silent as he stood, frozen in place. "No, I'm fine right here." He was tense now, his need colliding with his logic. This is getting way too real.
"Pretty please, with sugar on top?" Sydney smiled her most captivating smile, dimples fully deployed.
"That's enough Sydney," Vuaghn snapped. "This has to stop right now. There are things you don't know."
Sydney sat up, facing Vaughn. She was angry now, but he wasn't sure he cared anymore.
"Well then tell me," she snapped in response. "For Gods' sake, Vaughn, just tell me!"
A knock on the door caught each of their attention. Vaughn motioned for Sydney to hide in the bathroom. She lept off the bed and quickly obeyed. Once she was safely out of the way, Vaughn walked to the door. "Who is it?" he called through the door. He placed his left hand on the butt of his gun.
"Jiminy Cricket."
Vaughn knew that sarcasm anywhere. He heaved a sigh of relief and removed his hand from his gun. He unlatched the door motioned for Eric Weiss to step inside.
Weiss inhaled deeply and looked around the room.
"So what's going on, Weiss?" Vaughn was grateful for this distraction. He didn't want to know what would have happened if he and Sydney continued this game.
Weiss' eyes were fixed at Vaughn's undone belt. "Funny," he replied with a grin and raised eyebrow. "I could ask you the very same thing. Is there anything you'd like to tell me, Vaughn?"
Vaughn's brow furrowed in confusion. He rolled his eyes. The belt, stupid. He pivoted to the side, hiding his red face, and hastilly rebuckled his belt.
"Sydney missed a meeting with Sloane. Jack covered, but ten minutes later called screaming questions and accusations at Devlin, who in turn screamed more questions and more accusations at me. I told him I'd find you. You know," Weiss began as he craned his neck around the motel room. "I think I've been here before. You know their bed vibra--"
"Sydney," Vaughn called out, interrupting what could only be another edition of Weiss's Guide to One Night Stands.
Sydney slowly opened the bathroom door and joined the two CIA agents. The three of them stood in a triangle facing each other as Sydney explained about Marshall being next door and the SD-6 tail and not having any other way out of the room and that they had needed a distraction to blend into the atmosphere.
Weiss nodded and looked at Vaughn. "I told you the motel room was a bad idea."
"Shut up."
"You know what Haladki's going to do now, right?"
"Yeah, he'll run to Devlin and report me."
"Not if I tell Devlin what happened, first," Sydney offered. She put a hand on Vaughn's shoulder and smiled at Weiss. "Vaughn was a perfect gentleman tonight. Even a manhandling double agent couldn't shake him. The boy done good!" She flashed her winningest smile at Weiss.
Vaughn dropped his head, closed his eyes, and shook his head. He could feel the blush blazing across his face and felt a pinch on his left facial cheek. And another on his right other cheek. He shot a warning look at Sydney, who smiled sweetly in response.
"So Michael, you wanna go get drunk? I know this great club," he began, throwing an arm around Vaughn's shoulders. "There's this dancer there that looks just like--"
"Absolutely not!" Vaughn snapped. "A sports bar, or maybe a pick-up game of hockey. But no women. Got that Weiss? No women!"
Vaughn huffed something in French as he stormed out of the room.
Weiss leaned toward Sydney. "What's that all about?"
"I don't know," she shrugged and flashed Weiss her most innocent face. He shrugged in response and followed his friend.
Syndey watched Weiss leave, waited another 5 minutes, and made her own departure. She made a mental note to ask Vaughn what collogne he wore during their next briefing. For Will's birthday, seven months away.
THE END.