~Yes! Thank you God! I have finally finished this story of pain and suffering, Kimahri style! Enjoy!~Silver Neko, fear her heart, for it knows no terror.
"After horrible blond thing finish ranting about things that are blond, we grab weapons and head through dead Z city. Soon we get to dome thing and dead man pop up and talk. We then go INTO dome. Wow. Inside we see memories of people. Kimahri hates memories. One time in first grade, over weekend, Kimahri given sacred duty to take care of class pet: Miss Snoogles. Kimahri decided to take Miss Snoogles on underwater adventure. How was Kimahri supposed to know that the pressure inside the Submarine/Pepsi bottle was too high and would cause Submarine/Pepsi bottle to implode, killing Miss Snoogles inside. MISS SNOOGLES! AAAAAAAAAAH! Kimahri needs beer now...*Glug*...that better. So inside we fight ALL SORTS of dead things and see many memories of stupid people. We see young Seymour crying about stuff. Teehee. We see Yuna's papa and Man in red when he young man in red AND Blond monster from 1000 years ago's daddy. Whoo.
So we get into the...thing...and inside there am puzzle...and...*Note to readers: Alcohol is kicking in* colors...must step on them. Nooo....guh....blond ducking step on wrong color. Now we have to restart the dance. Kimahri don't remember much then, all to bright. PUZZLE DONE! YES! Oh poop. A monster wants Kimahri's shinys. Kimahri needs this shinys to buy a copy of Green Plummer man's mansion. Ahhh, it make head exploady! Unicorn who's name starts with I saved the day! Yaaaay!
So we go down thing and find out that Final Summon is dead or something. Kimahri both fears and longs for death. Everyone look sad then. But then new dead guy comes and says stuff. So we follow him and meet Lady who wears very little clothing. Wow. She yammer of about the light of hope and Spira's hope and hope and more hope. Hope again. She then say that one of Yuna's guardians must become Final Summon. Please pick Blond boy from 1000 years ago, please pick Blond boy from 1000 years ago, please pick Blond boy from 1000 years ago, please pick Blond boy from 1000 years ago, please pick Blond boy from 1000 years ago, please pick Blond boy from 1000 years ago. Please God, do not deny Kimahri this one simple wish! Puh-leese! Suddenly Yuna ask if some day Sin be defeated...and stuff. Lady with very little clothing say no. Man with odd hair yell and say stuff about mankind cleansing itself of Sin and atoning for sin and sin stuff. Once Kimahri say Sin too many times, word loses all meaning.
Lady with very little clothing say that humanity will never reach that kind of Purity...or something. Shit. Kimahri sick of so much talking! So after that everyone is no happy and we (By "we" Kimahri means everyone but Kimahri) decide to no do Final Summoning. We go into spooky space room and tell lady with not much clothing this. Lady no happy. She say she going to put Kimahri and others out of our misery. Uh oh, Kimahri thinks that mean she gunna kill us....yep...Kimahri was right. So we fight fight fight and nearly become Zombies. At one time or another, Lady with very little clothing on turn into big icky head of DEATH. We then kill her good. So as Lady with very little clothing started to turn to dust, she moan about light of hope being gone and so on. She then say stuff about Yu Yevon. Kimahri no-SQUIRREL THING IN MOUTH! IT TAKING KIMAHRI'S GUM! CURSE YOU SQUIRREL THING! CURSE YOOOOOU! KIMAHRI SHALL HAVE KIMAHRI'S REVENGE....AND GUM!
So we head out of big dome and outside is....Sin. When will the pee dry? Luckily, Sin see Pidgin and merrily chase after it. Al Bhed ship come and pick us up. Wheee! Kimahri is filled with girlish glee! While we on ship, Man with odd hair or Al Bhed girl come up with really stupid idea. They say that Sin gets all sleepy when Sin hears the Fayth song. Kimahri thinks that really, really shitty idea. Yuna like it though. So we decide to travel across Spira and tell people to sing happy song. Is Kimahri still drunk? Kimahri's hand is not talking to Kimahri or calling Kimahri "D" so Kimahri must be sober...for now. Along magical journey happy singing bright and shiny songs, we decide to go to super fun Omega Ruins and get killed....uh.....kill Omega monster. Yes. Let Kimahri tell you something: Monsters in Omega Ruins really fucking tough. After weeks of super non fun running around, we finally meet Omega....but it not really Omega. It just evil clone or something, according to Man in red. So we go in, fight horrible monster of super death and burning pain, and kill it. Yay.
So after THAT, we head to Macalania woods and Kimahri spend a FUCKING YEAR chasing Butterflies while Lady with bird for head pinch Kimahri's ass every chance she get. Finally, Kimahri gets all the blue butterflies. Bird lady give Kimahri a new thing in shape of Saturn. Then Blond boy go off and find a round pulsing thing in a tree that make our weapons all good at killing things better by merging them with two shiny things. Kimahri lets thing have Kimahri's lance that Kimahri got at the Thunder plains. The thing takes Kimahri's two Saturn things and melds them with spear. Yay! Kimahri has kickass Lance of death now! After that, we head off and go to all temples again, talk to people, see dead people, talk to Fayths and buy Cherry Icees (Kimahri loves them Icees good). Finally it time to go fight Sin. So we get on top of ship and play happy Fayth song. Whee. Oh no, now Sin is super non happy. It do funky gravity death attack. We fight one arm, Al Bhed the shoot arm off. That very cool. We fight other arm, it get shooty shoot also. We then hurt Sin's head thingy. Sin the fall and crash into B city. Hehehe, smoke.
Suddenly Sin sprout purdy wings and fly up onto building. Blond boy and Sin have staring contest. Goddamn blond boy. Then we fight. Oh how we fight. It suck to fight monster that could fit you up It's butt. Soon Sin die and dissolve. Suddenly we see fiery eyeball that giggle evilly. Yuna then say we have to go INSIDE dead Sin. What with that? So we go in and wonder around until we reach stairway and walk up it. Shit fuck god, Kimahri is in hell. It Seymour. He just no stay dead. Seymour yammer about controlling Sin but Kimahri no care! It stab time! We make Seymour hurt good and finally Yuna get to send stoopid Measter farplain where he can piss off little balls of light with his poopyness. Yay for Kimahri. We go up more stairs and into horrible tower thing that collapse, and suddenly the next thing Kimahri knows, we're all chasing shiny things around while pointy things try to poke us
Then suddenly, we in place that look like city with name that start with Z, but all lights are off. We find Blond boy's popa. Blond boy scream that he hate his Popa. Popa look sad. Then he fling self into fiery pit of fire and pop out and Final Summon who look suspiciously like Blond boys Popa with claws. So let Kimahri get this strait, IF Blond boy had become Final Summon, Yuna would of Summoned bog hairy Blond boy with claws? *Shudder* Kimahri does not need that image in Kimahri's head. So we fight Blond boys popa and he die. Blond boy hold his popa in his arms and cry cry cry like Kimahri did when Kimahri went to see "A.I." Poor little robot boy doomed from the start. Sniff. So the icky black blob come and it am supposed to be Yu Yevon. Oookaay. Yuna let It posses her Summons and then she kill them. Yu Yevon then show It's true form: Black Tick with angle on tummy. Teehee! Kimahri wants to snuggle it! So we fight fight fight fight fight fight fight fight fight fight fight fight fight *Inhales* fight fight fight fight fight fight fight fight untill Yu Yevon dead like Kimahri's will to live. Yay.
After that, Man in red tell us all that he IS ghost and that he want to be sent to Farplain now. He thunk Kimahri on the chest and the get sent by Yuna. Sniff, Kimahri will miss you, Man in red. You make best fried squirrel things in Spira. We get out of Sin corps and Yuna send all the Summons. Goodbye Unicorn who's name starts with I. Suddenly Blond boy from 1000 years ago says that he is a dream and that he going to DIE now. Sweet! Yuna try to hug him but she fall on face. Damn head voices are yelling at Kimahri again! Kimahri no want to feel bad! Kimahri want to be happy now! Blond boy say he LUV Yuna, Yuna say she LUV Blond boy. Blond boy the fling self off of flying ship. You can not comprehend Kimahri's joy right then.
Months later, Yuna am savior of Spira and everyone love her. She makes big speech about starting a new life and Kimahri hums the Meow Mix song. So everyone happy. Yuna am Goddess, Lady with big boobs now PREGNANT for some reason, Man with odd hair is fat, Al Bhed girl makes machines work again, Man in red is gone, Blond boy is gone and Kimahri sits around and watches Blitz ball all day while eating sour cream and onion potato chips. Life is decent. Yay."
THE END!
~Yaaaaaaay! I'm done! Now I can write about...Pokemon? No, thats not right....eh, I need some new games to inspire me. I'm very VERY glad you people loved this story. The only reason I finished it was the great reveiws. So untill next time, I am....Silver Neko!~Silver Neko, forever the same.
"After horrible blond thing finish ranting about things that are blond, we grab weapons and head through dead Z city. Soon we get to dome thing and dead man pop up and talk. We then go INTO dome. Wow. Inside we see memories of people. Kimahri hates memories. One time in first grade, over weekend, Kimahri given sacred duty to take care of class pet: Miss Snoogles. Kimahri decided to take Miss Snoogles on underwater adventure. How was Kimahri supposed to know that the pressure inside the Submarine/Pepsi bottle was too high and would cause Submarine/Pepsi bottle to implode, killing Miss Snoogles inside. MISS SNOOGLES! AAAAAAAAAAH! Kimahri needs beer now...*Glug*...that better. So inside we fight ALL SORTS of dead things and see many memories of stupid people. We see young Seymour crying about stuff. Teehee. We see Yuna's papa and Man in red when he young man in red AND Blond monster from 1000 years ago's daddy. Whoo.
So we get into the...thing...and inside there am puzzle...and...*Note to readers: Alcohol is kicking in* colors...must step on them. Nooo....guh....blond ducking step on wrong color. Now we have to restart the dance. Kimahri don't remember much then, all to bright. PUZZLE DONE! YES! Oh poop. A monster wants Kimahri's shinys. Kimahri needs this shinys to buy a copy of Green Plummer man's mansion. Ahhh, it make head exploady! Unicorn who's name starts with I saved the day! Yaaaay!
So we go down thing and find out that Final Summon is dead or something. Kimahri both fears and longs for death. Everyone look sad then. But then new dead guy comes and says stuff. So we follow him and meet Lady who wears very little clothing. Wow. She yammer of about the light of hope and Spira's hope and hope and more hope. Hope again. She then say that one of Yuna's guardians must become Final Summon. Please pick Blond boy from 1000 years ago, please pick Blond boy from 1000 years ago, please pick Blond boy from 1000 years ago, please pick Blond boy from 1000 years ago, please pick Blond boy from 1000 years ago, please pick Blond boy from 1000 years ago. Please God, do not deny Kimahri this one simple wish! Puh-leese! Suddenly Yuna ask if some day Sin be defeated...and stuff. Lady with very little clothing say no. Man with odd hair yell and say stuff about mankind cleansing itself of Sin and atoning for sin and sin stuff. Once Kimahri say Sin too many times, word loses all meaning.
Lady with very little clothing say that humanity will never reach that kind of Purity...or something. Shit. Kimahri sick of so much talking! So after that everyone is no happy and we (By "we" Kimahri means everyone but Kimahri) decide to no do Final Summoning. We go into spooky space room and tell lady with not much clothing this. Lady no happy. She say she going to put Kimahri and others out of our misery. Uh oh, Kimahri thinks that mean she gunna kill us....yep...Kimahri was right. So we fight fight fight and nearly become Zombies. At one time or another, Lady with very little clothing on turn into big icky head of DEATH. We then kill her good. So as Lady with very little clothing started to turn to dust, she moan about light of hope being gone and so on. She then say stuff about Yu Yevon. Kimahri no-SQUIRREL THING IN MOUTH! IT TAKING KIMAHRI'S GUM! CURSE YOU SQUIRREL THING! CURSE YOOOOOU! KIMAHRI SHALL HAVE KIMAHRI'S REVENGE....AND GUM!
So we head out of big dome and outside is....Sin. When will the pee dry? Luckily, Sin see Pidgin and merrily chase after it. Al Bhed ship come and pick us up. Wheee! Kimahri is filled with girlish glee! While we on ship, Man with odd hair or Al Bhed girl come up with really stupid idea. They say that Sin gets all sleepy when Sin hears the Fayth song. Kimahri thinks that really, really shitty idea. Yuna like it though. So we decide to travel across Spira and tell people to sing happy song. Is Kimahri still drunk? Kimahri's hand is not talking to Kimahri or calling Kimahri "D" so Kimahri must be sober...for now. Along magical journey happy singing bright and shiny songs, we decide to go to super fun Omega Ruins and get killed....uh.....kill Omega monster. Yes. Let Kimahri tell you something: Monsters in Omega Ruins really fucking tough. After weeks of super non fun running around, we finally meet Omega....but it not really Omega. It just evil clone or something, according to Man in red. So we go in, fight horrible monster of super death and burning pain, and kill it. Yay.
So after THAT, we head to Macalania woods and Kimahri spend a FUCKING YEAR chasing Butterflies while Lady with bird for head pinch Kimahri's ass every chance she get. Finally, Kimahri gets all the blue butterflies. Bird lady give Kimahri a new thing in shape of Saturn. Then Blond boy go off and find a round pulsing thing in a tree that make our weapons all good at killing things better by merging them with two shiny things. Kimahri lets thing have Kimahri's lance that Kimahri got at the Thunder plains. The thing takes Kimahri's two Saturn things and melds them with spear. Yay! Kimahri has kickass Lance of death now! After that, we head off and go to all temples again, talk to people, see dead people, talk to Fayths and buy Cherry Icees (Kimahri loves them Icees good). Finally it time to go fight Sin. So we get on top of ship and play happy Fayth song. Whee. Oh no, now Sin is super non happy. It do funky gravity death attack. We fight one arm, Al Bhed the shoot arm off. That very cool. We fight other arm, it get shooty shoot also. We then hurt Sin's head thingy. Sin the fall and crash into B city. Hehehe, smoke.
Suddenly Sin sprout purdy wings and fly up onto building. Blond boy and Sin have staring contest. Goddamn blond boy. Then we fight. Oh how we fight. It suck to fight monster that could fit you up It's butt. Soon Sin die and dissolve. Suddenly we see fiery eyeball that giggle evilly. Yuna then say we have to go INSIDE dead Sin. What with that? So we go in and wonder around until we reach stairway and walk up it. Shit fuck god, Kimahri is in hell. It Seymour. He just no stay dead. Seymour yammer about controlling Sin but Kimahri no care! It stab time! We make Seymour hurt good and finally Yuna get to send stoopid Measter farplain where he can piss off little balls of light with his poopyness. Yay for Kimahri. We go up more stairs and into horrible tower thing that collapse, and suddenly the next thing Kimahri knows, we're all chasing shiny things around while pointy things try to poke us
Then suddenly, we in place that look like city with name that start with Z, but all lights are off. We find Blond boy's popa. Blond boy scream that he hate his Popa. Popa look sad. Then he fling self into fiery pit of fire and pop out and Final Summon who look suspiciously like Blond boys Popa with claws. So let Kimahri get this strait, IF Blond boy had become Final Summon, Yuna would of Summoned bog hairy Blond boy with claws? *Shudder* Kimahri does not need that image in Kimahri's head. So we fight Blond boys popa and he die. Blond boy hold his popa in his arms and cry cry cry like Kimahri did when Kimahri went to see "A.I." Poor little robot boy doomed from the start. Sniff. So the icky black blob come and it am supposed to be Yu Yevon. Oookaay. Yuna let It posses her Summons and then she kill them. Yu Yevon then show It's true form: Black Tick with angle on tummy. Teehee! Kimahri wants to snuggle it! So we fight fight fight fight fight fight fight fight fight fight fight fight fight *Inhales* fight fight fight fight fight fight fight fight untill Yu Yevon dead like Kimahri's will to live. Yay.
After that, Man in red tell us all that he IS ghost and that he want to be sent to Farplain now. He thunk Kimahri on the chest and the get sent by Yuna. Sniff, Kimahri will miss you, Man in red. You make best fried squirrel things in Spira. We get out of Sin corps and Yuna send all the Summons. Goodbye Unicorn who's name starts with I. Suddenly Blond boy from 1000 years ago says that he is a dream and that he going to DIE now. Sweet! Yuna try to hug him but she fall on face. Damn head voices are yelling at Kimahri again! Kimahri no want to feel bad! Kimahri want to be happy now! Blond boy say he LUV Yuna, Yuna say she LUV Blond boy. Blond boy the fling self off of flying ship. You can not comprehend Kimahri's joy right then.
Months later, Yuna am savior of Spira and everyone love her. She makes big speech about starting a new life and Kimahri hums the Meow Mix song. So everyone happy. Yuna am Goddess, Lady with big boobs now PREGNANT for some reason, Man with odd hair is fat, Al Bhed girl makes machines work again, Man in red is gone, Blond boy is gone and Kimahri sits around and watches Blitz ball all day while eating sour cream and onion potato chips. Life is decent. Yay."
THE END!
~Yaaaaaaay! I'm done! Now I can write about...Pokemon? No, thats not right....eh, I need some new games to inspire me. I'm very VERY glad you people loved this story. The only reason I finished it was the great reveiws. So untill next time, I am....Silver Neko!~Silver Neko, forever the same.