Pilot
Disclaimer: ...
1 2 3 4 5 6 [7] 8 9 0
7
BEGIN TRANSMISSION
(Classical music plays in the background)
Suicune is sitting on a comfy chair.
Suicune: Good evening. I am Suicune, potentate of thug dogs, bringing you a glimpse at an historic episode of Mewtwo: Coast to Coast. Not many people know that in the early stages of this programme, there was a contract dispute in which the outcome was the last-minute hiring of sub-standard Robot Master, Gravity Man. I will be showing many clips and outtakes from this fiasco tonight. I present to you know, the r-r-remains of Gravity Man: Coast to Coast. Enjoy!
(Flim count down with projector sounds. Opening Gravity Man: Coast to Coast theme & titles)
Grav Man! Fun as in transmission.
Grav Man, in the middle of the night.
When your there for Grav Man,
diggin' uncle Grav Man!
GRAVITY MAN: COAST TO COAST
Gravity Man: What if I have to go the bathroom during the interveiw?
Joey: Relax, Jason. You'll be fine. Hey, stop worryin'. Now, I'd like you to meet the show's director, Eneti.
Gravity Man: Hey, Eneti! Good to have you aboard!
Eneti: Yeah, well it's this or back to solitary.
Joey: Jason, this is Suicune, he'll be your band leader.
Suicune: I prefer musical ar-r-r-ranger if you don't mind? Any upright Legendary Dog with an appendage or two can "tickle the ivories". (Plays a classical piano excerpt) Anywho, it's a delight to meet you, Gravity Man, charmed, I'm sure.
Gravity Man: What's with this guy, is he gonna do this on the show?
Eneti: Uh, I gotta question.
Joey: Yeah, babe, shoot.
Eneti: Um, just exactly, um...what do I do?
Joey: I told you, just push the lever up and down, ok?
Eneti: Up, down. (Pushes lever up and down, control room monitor shows off-screen shot of Gravity Man's Metool.) Up, down. (Pushes lever up and down, control room monitor shows Suicune in keyboard pod.) Down... (Pushes lever) Wait a minute!
(Beep!)
(The room is empty, Gravity Man crashes through the ceiling, feet dangling)
Gravity Man: Uh, a little help up here.
(Beep!)
(Gravity Man flies down from above, lands on stage, and does his fighting pose)
Gravity Man: (Speaking Nervously) Um, good evening, um, welcome to the show, I'm, er, your host, uh... (Echo effect) GRAVITY MAAAAAAAAAN! (Camera lens cracks, woman screams) Do I have to pay for that?
(Beep!)
Gravity Man: Good evening everyone, um, I'm your show, Gravity Man...hey, I'm sorry, sorry.
(Beep!)
Gravity Man: I just flew in from the coast and boy, are my arms...oh, thrusters, you wanted thrusters there? I mean, thrusters!
(Beep!)
Gravity Man: Ok, ok, ok, ok...eh, we do it again?
(Beep!)
Gravity Man: Uh, well...hey, have you heard about this grunge rock music the kids are into? It's uh, pretty weird...
Suicune: Yippity, yappity, yappity! What are you going on about, junk robot?
Gravity Man: Um, I'm trying to do my opening monologue.
Suicune: Opening monologue? It sounded more like your were delivering a eulogy! (Laughs)
(Beep!)
Metool: (Hops up)
Gravity Man: (Whispers) Should I start now?
Joey: Yeah.
Gravity Man: Uh, howdy, folks! Let's say hello to our director, uh...
Eneti: Eneti!
Gravity Man: My faithful friend and side kick, Metool.
Metool: (Bows and ducks down)
Gravity Man: And our band leader...
Suicune: Musical Dir-r-r-rector, Suicune! Observe. (Plays something classical on keyboard)
Gravity Man: (Sighs)
Voice: You're pathetic, Suicune.
Gravity Man: What was that?
Joey: Well, that's Lugia...
Lugia: Hello.
Joey: He's our backup bird, you know, in case something happens to Liberace here?
Suicune: I wish my br-r-r-other George was here!
(Beep!)
Gravity Man: Oh, I'm stupid!
Joey: Yeah, just pick up where you left off, Jason, it'll work, just fine.
Gravity Man: Um, tonight's guest are, um...who are the guests, anyway?
Eneti: Ice and Tower, American Gladiators.
Gravity Man: Is that it? Oh, well, ladies and gentlemen, tonight's guests...Tower and Ice.
Monitor lowers with Tower and Ice, followed by dead silence.
Joey: Jason?
Suicune: Well, what are you waiting for, tin can? Say something.
Gravity Man: I will, just gimme a second. (Pause) What should I say?
Joey: Anything you like, just, uh, just wing it, ok, Jason?
Gravity Man: (Pause) OHHHHH, THE PRESSURE!!!
(Beep!)
Gravity Man: Um, welcome, Ice and Tower, it's, it's great to have you here.
Ice: (Laughs)
Gravity Man: Ummmm...
Tower: How are you doin'? I mean, are you...
Gravity Man: Well, not so great, actually. I got my whole entire life riding on this job, and if doesn't work out it probably means the end of my marriage and my career.
Suicune: Oh, my, Gape at me, I'm the pitiful tragic Gravity Man! I flit about in total depression! Oh, poor pitiful me! My world is an irventine pile!
Gravity Man: Ok, that's enough! I can't work with this dog. He's getting on my nerves, and I don't understand a thing he says anyways.
Joey: Jason, Jason, calm down. Just do the show, ok?
Gravity Man: Yeah, ok.
Suicune: My hatred for you...is delicious!
(Beep!)
Metool: (Jumps up and down, in background)
Gravity Man: So, what's your position, uh, on this grunge music?
Tower: I'd have to say my favorite event is the joust, um, it's a great feeling...
Suicune: I say, can't you do anything to squelch the cacophonous hopping of your midget wind-up toy?
Gravity Man: Speak english, sissy!
Suicune: Might I suggst that the beast may provide more entertainment value IF I PULL IT'S STUPID HEAD OFF!!!
Gravity Man: That's it! GRAVITY HOLD, COMMENCE!
(He unleashes a ball of energy slamming Suicune on the ceiling over and over again)
(Film trailer, end of movie reel noise)
Suicune: (Palm-face) I'm sorry...but seeing that again...OH, PLEASE! OH, PLEASE, GO AWAY!
INTERRUPT TRANSMISSION
START TRANSMISSION
Suicune: And now, the conclusion of Gravity Man: Coast to Coast, and mother, stop the VCR, your sonny boy's not in this part.
(Film count down, with projector noises)
Lugia: (In keyboard pod, plays "Chopsticks") (To Eneti) Suicune's in the Hospital. (Evil Laugh)
(Beep!)
Gravity Man: So, what's it's like being a Gladiator?
Ice: It's, uh, it's a lifestyle that's a lot of fun, being a Gladiator and superhero among kids.
Gravity Man: You actually consider yourselves superheroes?
Tower: Yeah.
Gravity Man: Ha! You fight mere mortals, superheroes fight villians, evil villians!
Ice: Actually, I do think we fight villians, don't we? Some of our contestants?
Tower: Well, we got some people, yeah, they're pretty doggone evil, I'll tell you that.
Gravity Man: Yeah, right! Look out for Ted, the volunteer fireman. Woooo!
Tower: Are you challenging us?
Lugia: Sounds like a challenge to me.
Gravity Man: Listen, Lugia! Don't make me angry. You wouldn't like me when I'm angry.
Lugia: I don't like you now!
Tower & Ice: (Laugh)
Eneti: (Laugh)
Gravity Man: Can't I get any respect around here? On my own show?
Tower & Ice: No, probably not.
Eneti: No!
Gravity Man: I demand respect, I'm Gravity Man! (Echo effect) GRAVITY MAAAAAN!
Lugia: Yeah, whatever.
Gravity Man: Ooooh, I hate you! I hate you all! (Flies off)
Tower: Now, if he was a Gladiator, what would we call him, like, Cry-baby or something?
Eneti: CRY-BABY?! (Laughs)
Lugia: (Laughs) Oh, that's rich!
Gravity Man: (Flies back, angry) I heard that!
(Beep!)
Joey: Jason! Jason, pull yourself together! It's gettin' late here, man.
Gravity Man: Ok, ok, get off my back! (Holy ra! Sun's goin' down. Must finish interview before my secret is reveiled.)
Joey: Jason, while we're young alright?
Gravity Man: Um, ok. Y'know, my wife always wants me to do things around the house, like move stuff, y'know, open the pickle jar.
Tower: The pickle jar? (Laughs)
Ice: The pickle jar.
Gravity Man: Do you have that problem?
Ice: You know, this is what I tell people, a lot of people want me to open jars, help them move. These muscles are for show. (Laughs)
Gravity Man: (Dozes off for a second)
Tower: Later, not! (Laughs)
Ice: These things really don't work! (Laughs)
Gravity Man: Actually, my wife is thinking of leaving me.
Tower & Ice: (Laugh)
Gravity Man: I'm serious.
(Beep!)
Ice: Imagine about twenty tousand people watching you...
Gravity Man: (Nodding off as she speaks)
Ice: And it's very dark on the floor, and you can't see anything in front of you, and I tripped on a mat! (Laughs)
Gravity Man: (Asleep at the desk)
Eneti: Gravity Man!
Gravity Man: (Wakes up) Uh, here, here!
Joey: Jason...are you all right?
Gravity Man: Uh, wha? Oh, um, sorry, uh, low blood sugar.
Joey: Hey, can, can we get a peon to bring bring this loser some coffee?
Eneti: Cry-baby!
(Beep!)
Joey: What do you mean you can't do this show at night?!
Gravity Man: (Struggling to stay awake) When...stars...rays...hit me...Gravity Man......loses...energy.
Joey: YOU GOTTA BE KIDDIN' ME! DR. WILY DIDN'T SAY ANYTHING ABOUT THIS!
Gravity Man: Wait...till...morning...Gravity Man...be...fine. (Drops head on desk, falls asleep)
Lugia: Well, thanks for comin' guys. Say, goodnight, Gravity Man.
Gravity Man: (Mumbles in hs sleep) Uh, goodnight, Gravity...Man...
Ice: Thank you.
Gravity Man: Goodnight...
Tower: Cry-baby. (Laughs)
Eneti: I guess it's past his bedtime.
Lugia: Let's cook him! I bet he taste like chicken! (evil laugh)
Gravity Man: (Talking in his sleep) I'll be good...
Joey: JASON!
Gravity Man: (Wakes up) Uh, oh, uh, are we done?
Joey: No, Jason, but you are.
Gravity Man: What?
Joey: Gravity Man, YOU'RE FIRED!
Eneti: (Laughs)
Lugia: (Laughs) Yeah!
Gravity Man: Look, you can't do this to me. I need this job! I'll do anything! I'll get a sunlamp, you don't understand, you can't fire me, I'm the Gravity Man!
Lugia: The Gravity Man?
Gravity Man: The Gravity Man is all right, he's ok! Don't you know who you're dealing with here?! The Gravity Man, THE GRAVITY MAN! GRAVITY Maaan!(Collapses on his desk, sobs, then falls asleep again)
Eneti: So, I guess we're cancelled, right?
Lugia: Should be.
Joey: Hey, good news, everyone! I just got off the phone with Mewtwo's agent, and everything's copacetic. Tommorow, we start shooting "Mewtwo: Coast to Coast". How about that, gang?
Eneti and Lugia: (Screams)
(Film trailer, end of movie reel noises)
Suicune: And so, Gravity Man's tears flowed on and on. A little Magnemite toldme he's now selling tent campers in Indiana. Tis true! I hear that if you say that Metool sent you, the propane tanks are free! Good night, all! Kiss kiss!
(Credits roll)
Gravity Man: (very tired voice) Graaaaaavity...Maaaaaaaaan...
EPISODE 39 PILOT
(Head hits the desk)
Disclaimer: ...
1 2 3 4 5 6 [7] 8 9 0
7
BEGIN TRANSMISSION
(Classical music plays in the background)
Suicune is sitting on a comfy chair.
Suicune: Good evening. I am Suicune, potentate of thug dogs, bringing you a glimpse at an historic episode of Mewtwo: Coast to Coast. Not many people know that in the early stages of this programme, there was a contract dispute in which the outcome was the last-minute hiring of sub-standard Robot Master, Gravity Man. I will be showing many clips and outtakes from this fiasco tonight. I present to you know, the r-r-remains of Gravity Man: Coast to Coast. Enjoy!
(Flim count down with projector sounds. Opening Gravity Man: Coast to Coast theme & titles)
Grav Man! Fun as in transmission.
Grav Man, in the middle of the night.
When your there for Grav Man,
diggin' uncle Grav Man!
GRAVITY MAN: COAST TO COAST
Gravity Man: What if I have to go the bathroom during the interveiw?
Joey: Relax, Jason. You'll be fine. Hey, stop worryin'. Now, I'd like you to meet the show's director, Eneti.
Gravity Man: Hey, Eneti! Good to have you aboard!
Eneti: Yeah, well it's this or back to solitary.
Joey: Jason, this is Suicune, he'll be your band leader.
Suicune: I prefer musical ar-r-r-ranger if you don't mind? Any upright Legendary Dog with an appendage or two can "tickle the ivories". (Plays a classical piano excerpt) Anywho, it's a delight to meet you, Gravity Man, charmed, I'm sure.
Gravity Man: What's with this guy, is he gonna do this on the show?
Eneti: Uh, I gotta question.
Joey: Yeah, babe, shoot.
Eneti: Um, just exactly, um...what do I do?
Joey: I told you, just push the lever up and down, ok?
Eneti: Up, down. (Pushes lever up and down, control room monitor shows off-screen shot of Gravity Man's Metool.) Up, down. (Pushes lever up and down, control room monitor shows Suicune in keyboard pod.) Down... (Pushes lever) Wait a minute!
(Beep!)
(The room is empty, Gravity Man crashes through the ceiling, feet dangling)
Gravity Man: Uh, a little help up here.
(Beep!)
(Gravity Man flies down from above, lands on stage, and does his fighting pose)
Gravity Man: (Speaking Nervously) Um, good evening, um, welcome to the show, I'm, er, your host, uh... (Echo effect) GRAVITY MAAAAAAAAAN! (Camera lens cracks, woman screams) Do I have to pay for that?
(Beep!)
Gravity Man: Good evening everyone, um, I'm your show, Gravity Man...hey, I'm sorry, sorry.
(Beep!)
Gravity Man: I just flew in from the coast and boy, are my arms...oh, thrusters, you wanted thrusters there? I mean, thrusters!
(Beep!)
Gravity Man: Ok, ok, ok, ok...eh, we do it again?
(Beep!)
Gravity Man: Uh, well...hey, have you heard about this grunge rock music the kids are into? It's uh, pretty weird...
Suicune: Yippity, yappity, yappity! What are you going on about, junk robot?
Gravity Man: Um, I'm trying to do my opening monologue.
Suicune: Opening monologue? It sounded more like your were delivering a eulogy! (Laughs)
(Beep!)
Metool: (Hops up)
Gravity Man: (Whispers) Should I start now?
Joey: Yeah.
Gravity Man: Uh, howdy, folks! Let's say hello to our director, uh...
Eneti: Eneti!
Gravity Man: My faithful friend and side kick, Metool.
Metool: (Bows and ducks down)
Gravity Man: And our band leader...
Suicune: Musical Dir-r-r-rector, Suicune! Observe. (Plays something classical on keyboard)
Gravity Man: (Sighs)
Voice: You're pathetic, Suicune.
Gravity Man: What was that?
Joey: Well, that's Lugia...
Lugia: Hello.
Joey: He's our backup bird, you know, in case something happens to Liberace here?
Suicune: I wish my br-r-r-other George was here!
(Beep!)
Gravity Man: Oh, I'm stupid!
Joey: Yeah, just pick up where you left off, Jason, it'll work, just fine.
Gravity Man: Um, tonight's guest are, um...who are the guests, anyway?
Eneti: Ice and Tower, American Gladiators.
Gravity Man: Is that it? Oh, well, ladies and gentlemen, tonight's guests...Tower and Ice.
Monitor lowers with Tower and Ice, followed by dead silence.
Joey: Jason?
Suicune: Well, what are you waiting for, tin can? Say something.
Gravity Man: I will, just gimme a second. (Pause) What should I say?
Joey: Anything you like, just, uh, just wing it, ok, Jason?
Gravity Man: (Pause) OHHHHH, THE PRESSURE!!!
(Beep!)
Gravity Man: Um, welcome, Ice and Tower, it's, it's great to have you here.
Ice: (Laughs)
Gravity Man: Ummmm...
Tower: How are you doin'? I mean, are you...
Gravity Man: Well, not so great, actually. I got my whole entire life riding on this job, and if doesn't work out it probably means the end of my marriage and my career.
Suicune: Oh, my, Gape at me, I'm the pitiful tragic Gravity Man! I flit about in total depression! Oh, poor pitiful me! My world is an irventine pile!
Gravity Man: Ok, that's enough! I can't work with this dog. He's getting on my nerves, and I don't understand a thing he says anyways.
Joey: Jason, Jason, calm down. Just do the show, ok?
Gravity Man: Yeah, ok.
Suicune: My hatred for you...is delicious!
(Beep!)
Metool: (Jumps up and down, in background)
Gravity Man: So, what's your position, uh, on this grunge music?
Tower: I'd have to say my favorite event is the joust, um, it's a great feeling...
Suicune: I say, can't you do anything to squelch the cacophonous hopping of your midget wind-up toy?
Gravity Man: Speak english, sissy!
Suicune: Might I suggst that the beast may provide more entertainment value IF I PULL IT'S STUPID HEAD OFF!!!
Gravity Man: That's it! GRAVITY HOLD, COMMENCE!
(He unleashes a ball of energy slamming Suicune on the ceiling over and over again)
(Film trailer, end of movie reel noise)
Suicune: (Palm-face) I'm sorry...but seeing that again...OH, PLEASE! OH, PLEASE, GO AWAY!
INTERRUPT TRANSMISSION
START TRANSMISSION
Suicune: And now, the conclusion of Gravity Man: Coast to Coast, and mother, stop the VCR, your sonny boy's not in this part.
(Film count down, with projector noises)
Lugia: (In keyboard pod, plays "Chopsticks") (To Eneti) Suicune's in the Hospital. (Evil Laugh)
(Beep!)
Gravity Man: So, what's it's like being a Gladiator?
Ice: It's, uh, it's a lifestyle that's a lot of fun, being a Gladiator and superhero among kids.
Gravity Man: You actually consider yourselves superheroes?
Tower: Yeah.
Gravity Man: Ha! You fight mere mortals, superheroes fight villians, evil villians!
Ice: Actually, I do think we fight villians, don't we? Some of our contestants?
Tower: Well, we got some people, yeah, they're pretty doggone evil, I'll tell you that.
Gravity Man: Yeah, right! Look out for Ted, the volunteer fireman. Woooo!
Tower: Are you challenging us?
Lugia: Sounds like a challenge to me.
Gravity Man: Listen, Lugia! Don't make me angry. You wouldn't like me when I'm angry.
Lugia: I don't like you now!
Tower & Ice: (Laugh)
Eneti: (Laugh)
Gravity Man: Can't I get any respect around here? On my own show?
Tower & Ice: No, probably not.
Eneti: No!
Gravity Man: I demand respect, I'm Gravity Man! (Echo effect) GRAVITY MAAAAAN!
Lugia: Yeah, whatever.
Gravity Man: Ooooh, I hate you! I hate you all! (Flies off)
Tower: Now, if he was a Gladiator, what would we call him, like, Cry-baby or something?
Eneti: CRY-BABY?! (Laughs)
Lugia: (Laughs) Oh, that's rich!
Gravity Man: (Flies back, angry) I heard that!
(Beep!)
Joey: Jason! Jason, pull yourself together! It's gettin' late here, man.
Gravity Man: Ok, ok, get off my back! (Holy ra! Sun's goin' down. Must finish interview before my secret is reveiled.)
Joey: Jason, while we're young alright?
Gravity Man: Um, ok. Y'know, my wife always wants me to do things around the house, like move stuff, y'know, open the pickle jar.
Tower: The pickle jar? (Laughs)
Ice: The pickle jar.
Gravity Man: Do you have that problem?
Ice: You know, this is what I tell people, a lot of people want me to open jars, help them move. These muscles are for show. (Laughs)
Gravity Man: (Dozes off for a second)
Tower: Later, not! (Laughs)
Ice: These things really don't work! (Laughs)
Gravity Man: Actually, my wife is thinking of leaving me.
Tower & Ice: (Laugh)
Gravity Man: I'm serious.
(Beep!)
Ice: Imagine about twenty tousand people watching you...
Gravity Man: (Nodding off as she speaks)
Ice: And it's very dark on the floor, and you can't see anything in front of you, and I tripped on a mat! (Laughs)
Gravity Man: (Asleep at the desk)
Eneti: Gravity Man!
Gravity Man: (Wakes up) Uh, here, here!
Joey: Jason...are you all right?
Gravity Man: Uh, wha? Oh, um, sorry, uh, low blood sugar.
Joey: Hey, can, can we get a peon to bring bring this loser some coffee?
Eneti: Cry-baby!
(Beep!)
Joey: What do you mean you can't do this show at night?!
Gravity Man: (Struggling to stay awake) When...stars...rays...hit me...Gravity Man......loses...energy.
Joey: YOU GOTTA BE KIDDIN' ME! DR. WILY DIDN'T SAY ANYTHING ABOUT THIS!
Gravity Man: Wait...till...morning...Gravity Man...be...fine. (Drops head on desk, falls asleep)
Lugia: Well, thanks for comin' guys. Say, goodnight, Gravity Man.
Gravity Man: (Mumbles in hs sleep) Uh, goodnight, Gravity...Man...
Ice: Thank you.
Gravity Man: Goodnight...
Tower: Cry-baby. (Laughs)
Eneti: I guess it's past his bedtime.
Lugia: Let's cook him! I bet he taste like chicken! (evil laugh)
Gravity Man: (Talking in his sleep) I'll be good...
Joey: JASON!
Gravity Man: (Wakes up) Uh, oh, uh, are we done?
Joey: No, Jason, but you are.
Gravity Man: What?
Joey: Gravity Man, YOU'RE FIRED!
Eneti: (Laughs)
Lugia: (Laughs) Yeah!
Gravity Man: Look, you can't do this to me. I need this job! I'll do anything! I'll get a sunlamp, you don't understand, you can't fire me, I'm the Gravity Man!
Lugia: The Gravity Man?
Gravity Man: The Gravity Man is all right, he's ok! Don't you know who you're dealing with here?! The Gravity Man, THE GRAVITY MAN! GRAVITY Maaan!(Collapses on his desk, sobs, then falls asleep again)
Eneti: So, I guess we're cancelled, right?
Lugia: Should be.
Joey: Hey, good news, everyone! I just got off the phone with Mewtwo's agent, and everything's copacetic. Tommorow, we start shooting "Mewtwo: Coast to Coast". How about that, gang?
Eneti and Lugia: (Screams)
(Film trailer, end of movie reel noises)
Suicune: And so, Gravity Man's tears flowed on and on. A little Magnemite toldme he's now selling tent campers in Indiana. Tis true! I hear that if you say that Metool sent you, the propane tanks are free! Good night, all! Kiss kiss!
(Credits roll)
Gravity Man: (very tired voice) Graaaaaavity...Maaaaaaaaan...
EPISODE 39 PILOT
(Head hits the desk)