Chapter 2
"Oh no!!" Klaus tried with all his might to pry open the door before theater troupe was out of the car and crowded around the trunk, waiting to unpack their junk and find a new hideout. Wherever they had parked, it must have been safe for six criminals to walk casually around to the trunk of their car, chatting quite loudly.
Sunny cringed and hid her face in Klaus's jacket as the acting troupe opened the trunk door. Count Olaf gasped sarcastically.
"Well, well well. I see we have some stowaways here who happen to have an exceptionally large fortune that they will inherit in a little over three years," Count Olaf snarled as he grabbed Sunny, who was struggling to break free. "Get out now!" he ordered Violet and Klaus.
All three orphans looked around. They had expected to find themselves in some dimly-lit alley or near a crummy old bar or even back at Olaf's house. But as they looked around, they were surprised to see merry-go-rounds and ferris wheels. Violet wondered if it was a joke.
The six villains led them into a fairly small yellow-and-white striped tent, where Esme explained to them what their fates would be.
"OK, brats, here's the deal. Actually, it's not really a deal, because you three don't get anything, but what do I care? Anyway, me and Olaf have decided who we want to keep and who we can dispose of. You'd think we'd pick the baby, because she is travel-size, but she won't always be so small, and besides, who wants to wait eighteen years for the fortune? Since you "murderers" are so dumb, then you'd assume I'd want to keep the oldest smart-aleck if i didn't want to wait for the cash. But you're wrong, because she's extremely inconveniently-sized and I can't deal with having to push a large brat around. So, we'll kill the oldest and youngest, but we'll keep the bookworm because he's not as big and not as young as the other two," explained Esme.
The Baudelaires stared, unable to speak. How would they get out of this mess? They had no one to help them now. Their only friends were flying forever in a self-sustaining mobile home, or so they thought.
"Of course, we'll kill the middle brat, too, once we have the money, don't worry. You will all be back with your darling parents before you know it!" Esme cackled.
"Fastinny!" Sunny shrieked. Her siblings knew at once that she meant "Not if we can help it" and the three convicted murderers raced out of the tent as fast as their legs could carry them.
"Hurry! Into that blue-and-white tent over there!" Violet said to Klaus and Sunny. Inside, a dark-haired woman wearing a bandana, a frilly red dress, and extremely large hoop earrings was staring down at her desk with a sad look on her face.
"Er...excuse me, ma'am? C-could we, um, hide in here? We're in something of an emergency situation right now," Klaus explained hastily.
"Why, sure, darlin'!" the lady smiled and pointed at a flap in the wall of the tent behind her desk. "Y'all can hide in this here room. 'Swhere I keep all my fortune tellin' stuff."
"Thank you so much! We'll explain later, and we'll pay you back, we promise," Violet said gratefully, and ushered Sunny and Klaus through the flap in the wall of the tent. It was dark and damp and smelled like fish that had been dead for a day or two and had not been refrigerated, but the orphans didn't mind. They dived into a pile of more frilly dresses and capes and decks of tarot cards and other fortune teller-like things, so they would not be seen if Count Olaf or one of his associates looked in the back room.
Sure enough, in a couple of minutes, they heard the voice of the hook- handed man.
"Have you seen three bratty orphans? Anywhere??" he asked in a desperate voice.
"Naw, sir, there ain't no kids in these here parts, I'll tell you's that. You'd best be on yer way, I'll tell you's if I see some suspicious-looking children 'round here, alrighty?" they heard the lady lie.
"The boss will KILL me!" the hook-handed man exclaimed as he ran out of the tent.
"It's safe for y'all to come out now; as I reckon that's who you's were runnin' from." The Baudelaires stepped hesitantly into the main part of the tent. "Aw, by the way, m'name's Madam Lulu. See, I went to France fer a year 'r two, 'n I saw this performin' cat, and 'er name was Lulu. I thought she was swell and I wanted people to think o' me that way, so I named meself after 'er. Only problem is I don't sound half as elegant as my name, so most people think I'm a phony psychic." She shuffled some cards. "Say, what're your names?"
Violet paused. If Madam Lulu read the Daily Punctilio, she'd call the police when Violet told her their names. The orphans had to be very careful about revealing their names to strangers, just in case.
"Umm...my name is...Isadora Quagmire. This is my brother, Duncan, and my sister, ah, Quiglina," Violet said, using the first names that popped into her head.
"OK, Isadora. Well, I have somethin' of a favor to ask of you three, if you do want to pay me back for hidin' y'all, like you said. You see, I'm in danger of losin' my job 'cause I accidentally let Chabo, my little V.F.D, loose, er, at acrobat's practice and he...hurt three of 'em real bad. They had to go off t' the hospital, and we can't perform without 'em. I promised the boss I'd find him three new acrobats for the show and....I can't bear to be kicked out of another travelin' carnival!!" and with that Madam Lulu put her head on her desk and cried.
"Noque, noque," Sunny said comfortingly, which, as you may remember, means "There, there."
"We'll be the acrobats, Madam Lulu...don't worry. But what, exactly, did you mean when you said Chabo was a V.F.D.?" Klaus said excitedly. The Baudelaires waited expectantly for her answer.
"Very Freakish Dog, of course!"
"Oh no!!" Klaus tried with all his might to pry open the door before theater troupe was out of the car and crowded around the trunk, waiting to unpack their junk and find a new hideout. Wherever they had parked, it must have been safe for six criminals to walk casually around to the trunk of their car, chatting quite loudly.
Sunny cringed and hid her face in Klaus's jacket as the acting troupe opened the trunk door. Count Olaf gasped sarcastically.
"Well, well well. I see we have some stowaways here who happen to have an exceptionally large fortune that they will inherit in a little over three years," Count Olaf snarled as he grabbed Sunny, who was struggling to break free. "Get out now!" he ordered Violet and Klaus.
All three orphans looked around. They had expected to find themselves in some dimly-lit alley or near a crummy old bar or even back at Olaf's house. But as they looked around, they were surprised to see merry-go-rounds and ferris wheels. Violet wondered if it was a joke.
The six villains led them into a fairly small yellow-and-white striped tent, where Esme explained to them what their fates would be.
"OK, brats, here's the deal. Actually, it's not really a deal, because you three don't get anything, but what do I care? Anyway, me and Olaf have decided who we want to keep and who we can dispose of. You'd think we'd pick the baby, because she is travel-size, but she won't always be so small, and besides, who wants to wait eighteen years for the fortune? Since you "murderers" are so dumb, then you'd assume I'd want to keep the oldest smart-aleck if i didn't want to wait for the cash. But you're wrong, because she's extremely inconveniently-sized and I can't deal with having to push a large brat around. So, we'll kill the oldest and youngest, but we'll keep the bookworm because he's not as big and not as young as the other two," explained Esme.
The Baudelaires stared, unable to speak. How would they get out of this mess? They had no one to help them now. Their only friends were flying forever in a self-sustaining mobile home, or so they thought.
"Of course, we'll kill the middle brat, too, once we have the money, don't worry. You will all be back with your darling parents before you know it!" Esme cackled.
"Fastinny!" Sunny shrieked. Her siblings knew at once that she meant "Not if we can help it" and the three convicted murderers raced out of the tent as fast as their legs could carry them.
"Hurry! Into that blue-and-white tent over there!" Violet said to Klaus and Sunny. Inside, a dark-haired woman wearing a bandana, a frilly red dress, and extremely large hoop earrings was staring down at her desk with a sad look on her face.
"Er...excuse me, ma'am? C-could we, um, hide in here? We're in something of an emergency situation right now," Klaus explained hastily.
"Why, sure, darlin'!" the lady smiled and pointed at a flap in the wall of the tent behind her desk. "Y'all can hide in this here room. 'Swhere I keep all my fortune tellin' stuff."
"Thank you so much! We'll explain later, and we'll pay you back, we promise," Violet said gratefully, and ushered Sunny and Klaus through the flap in the wall of the tent. It was dark and damp and smelled like fish that had been dead for a day or two and had not been refrigerated, but the orphans didn't mind. They dived into a pile of more frilly dresses and capes and decks of tarot cards and other fortune teller-like things, so they would not be seen if Count Olaf or one of his associates looked in the back room.
Sure enough, in a couple of minutes, they heard the voice of the hook- handed man.
"Have you seen three bratty orphans? Anywhere??" he asked in a desperate voice.
"Naw, sir, there ain't no kids in these here parts, I'll tell you's that. You'd best be on yer way, I'll tell you's if I see some suspicious-looking children 'round here, alrighty?" they heard the lady lie.
"The boss will KILL me!" the hook-handed man exclaimed as he ran out of the tent.
"It's safe for y'all to come out now; as I reckon that's who you's were runnin' from." The Baudelaires stepped hesitantly into the main part of the tent. "Aw, by the way, m'name's Madam Lulu. See, I went to France fer a year 'r two, 'n I saw this performin' cat, and 'er name was Lulu. I thought she was swell and I wanted people to think o' me that way, so I named meself after 'er. Only problem is I don't sound half as elegant as my name, so most people think I'm a phony psychic." She shuffled some cards. "Say, what're your names?"
Violet paused. If Madam Lulu read the Daily Punctilio, she'd call the police when Violet told her their names. The orphans had to be very careful about revealing their names to strangers, just in case.
"Umm...my name is...Isadora Quagmire. This is my brother, Duncan, and my sister, ah, Quiglina," Violet said, using the first names that popped into her head.
"OK, Isadora. Well, I have somethin' of a favor to ask of you three, if you do want to pay me back for hidin' y'all, like you said. You see, I'm in danger of losin' my job 'cause I accidentally let Chabo, my little V.F.D, loose, er, at acrobat's practice and he...hurt three of 'em real bad. They had to go off t' the hospital, and we can't perform without 'em. I promised the boss I'd find him three new acrobats for the show and....I can't bear to be kicked out of another travelin' carnival!!" and with that Madam Lulu put her head on her desk and cried.
"Noque, noque," Sunny said comfortingly, which, as you may remember, means "There, there."
"We'll be the acrobats, Madam Lulu...don't worry. But what, exactly, did you mean when you said Chabo was a V.F.D.?" Klaus said excitedly. The Baudelaires waited expectantly for her answer.
"Very Freakish Dog, of course!"