Disclaimer: Theirs made them money, mine make me smile. That's about it as far as monetary value goes. (mine not theirs.) So obviously I don't own any of the originals. More's the pity. Any way. Don't play with mine until I'm done with them, and don't play with them until I say 's okay, kay? Oh and one more thing. It has been brought to my attention that archiving info should be posted, so…. Want, ASK. Take and enjoy. Enjoy without asking you get beat.
Author's note: I know that I said earlier that I would not be making anymore apologies, but in this case I feel the need to make a slight one. Going back over ch. 12 after it was posted I noticed the screw up as far as the style and marking of the dialogue was concerned, and a few have complained that this made the chapter harder to follow. To these people I apologize. Everything was fixed so that that would not be a problem, but as all of you know my computer hates me, and somehow, during the transition from regular to html format, something went kablewy and the end result was a semi-confusing format when posted. Once again I apologize. That was not supposed to be it's appearance but that's how it went. And though I know that this will take up more of your time, for those of you interested in seeing how things were supposed to be read look to the following below. Those who wish to simply get on with the story page down and begin reading.
How things were supposed to go:
Internal thought was supposed to be seen as follows: 'Internal thought'
Internal debate was supposed to go follows: 'Internal self'
'Internal sub-conscience'
Telepathic thought should have been as follows: *Telepathic thought*
This is also the format that will try to be used through the remainder of this fic. As to whether or not it will work remains to be seen but rest assured I will do my damndest to see that it does. Okay, now you can go read. I'm done. I promise.
The Irony Of It All
Chapter 13: "Cat and Mouse"
"And that damned ole chickenlaid a hard-boiled egg!!!!!!!!"
One of the older goblins was swinging from the chandelier with a mug of wine sloshing down on those below. "Once more with feeling laddy boys!"
Sinoa rubbed the bridge of her nose, trying to allay the headache on the way. She was going to kill Fiametta.
"Oh well one high day
we was on our way
to see the briney sea…"
"What's a briney?"
No, on second thought, she was going to torture and then kill Fiametta. Once again Sinoa glanced around the room, taking notice of the illusion coats over the windows around the room. Basically, they meant that she was stuck in here for at least the next twelve hours, and quite possibly the next twenty-four, it all depended on how sadistic Fiametta had been feeling when she placed her in this room with no other intelligible creatures with which to converse, or even plot with. All in all she would rather have been launched into a pit a starving maze fairies than have to listen to this.
The drunken hoard started another rousing chorus.
She really was going to kill Fiametta. Well, when she saw her anyway.
Sinoa gave a mirthless laugh. Here she was, a princess of Tir Na Nog, and she was stuck in a chamber full a loud, smelly, rambunctious Goblins who were all drunk on what she suspected was her Uncle Dionysious' party wine. No doubt he had thoughtfully supplied several dozens of barrels of it for Fiametta's devious purposes. Honestly the two of them were incorrigible when they got together. Mentally she added him to her murder-maim-kill-List.
Just for the Tartarus inferno of it, she once more tried to mentally/magically remove the shields over the windows that held her here, and then winced when her headache suddenly intensified. 'When I get my hands on you Fiametta…'
Miserably she shoved a goblin off the throne and plopped herself down Indian-style on the seat. Sighing heavily Sinoa laid her head in her hands and went over various methods of mutilation ion her mind. If she was going to be stuck in here, she might as well be productive…..
"Ouch!" Automatically her hand came up to rub the sore spot on her head where something very solid had decided to acquaint itself with her scalp. "What the…? Oh wait a sec. I know you. You were at the gym weren't you? Poor baby, you didn't ask to get caught up in this mess did you?" Bending down Sinoa reached to pick up the exotic feline that was currently sizing her up.
"Poor baby? Really, just because I walk on four legs rather than two does not mean you have to speak to me as if I was a simpleton."
"Ahhh!" Scrambling backwards, (and ultimately landing flat on her @$$) Sinoa looked up to find the cat was currently perched on the throne, and was regarding her with what could only be amusement.
"You talk."
"Ah, the notorious Fae perception finally makes an appearance."
Sinoa's mouth opened and closed awkwardly for a few moments before she gave up and settled for glaring instead…well for a few moments anyway. "You can talk?"
Voice dripping with amused condescension, Lynx countered,"I thought we'd established that already. But if you need it clarified once more, then yes, I can talk."
"Apparently you can be annoying as well."
"Stating the facts is still considered annoying eh? At least that hasn't changed…"
"Well, if you can speak than you can at least be civil about it." Sinoa sniffed in what she hoped was a dignified manner, after all, she was still sitting on the floor, currently being put in her place by a cat.
More amusement from Lynx, drolly he replied, "Civil? Ah you mean pretend to be stupid so that your pride will not be offended, correct? I'm sorry but…no."
"Pretend? From what I can tell you don't have to pretend, after all you're currently insulting someone who could turn you into a toad."
"If that's the case then why are you still sprawled on the floor?" Lynx nimbly jumped off the seat of the throne and perched himself on Sinoa's knee, and stretched his face so that they were a millimeter away from being nose to nose, "Hmm?"
If it were possible Sinoa would have swore that his eyebrow lifted. "I..well…it's….because Dammit!"
"Because dammit. That was rather in depth response, wouldn't you say?"
That oh so irritating voice! So cultured, as though he'd been speaking his whole life, so damnably smug. 'Okay kitty-boy, let's play…'
Sinoa opted not to respond. She merely initiated a staring contest. With another look of amused superiority Lynx decided he'd play. Not fairly of course…
Slowly, millimeter by millimeter he got closer and closer and closer and-
"Dammit!" Sinoa pulled her face back and blinked several times, before turning her head back to glare at the offending cat. "You cheated!"
Lynx scoffed, "I cheated? How so?"
"Your whiskers tickled me! And you did it on purpose!"
Lynx once again sliced and diced with his voice in five simple words, "You never said I couldn't."
"But…I…that…wh-"
"Are you always this articulate?"
'Okay that does it.' "Are you always this irritating?"
Lynx lifted a paw to his chest in faux pain. "Ouch that one hurt."
"What's your problem anyway?"
"Other than your incompetence?"
"My incompetence!?!"
"Did I stu-stu-stutter? Your incompetence."
Flustered Sinoa abruptly stood, pushing Lynx off her knee as she did so. "What exactly do you mean, and keep in mind that while you may be able to speak right now, I'm still fighting the temptation to turn you into a croaking toad."
Lynx once again leapt onto the throne seat and then continued his ascent to the back board off the throne, (it made him look more imposing), before continuing, "You think to turn me into a toad, and yet you can't even get past the simple illusion coats over the windows. I'd love to see you try and manage an actual spell."
"You think you can do better Kitty-cat?"
Drawing himself up to his full seated height, (all 27 inches of it) Lynx did his damndest to smirk with his limited range of feline facial movement. "As a matter of fact, I can."
And with that, he muttered a few choice words under his breath and Sinoa could only stare in open-mouthed astonishment as the window guards wavered for a moment and then disappeared.
Trotting lightly towards the nearest open window Lynx called over his shoulder, "Well? Are you coming or not?"
Sinoa stood for a few moments and allowed all of this to process. "Uh…ya."
And she numbly climbed out of the window after him.
~~~*****~~~
Author's Note: I know that this is a short chapter but I still like it. And if things go the way I want them to, (they inevitably won't but I have to try) You should like the next two chapters as well. Anyway, chapters should also be making more appearances now that that evil bitch of a chapter is over with. (Note the should) I have to thank everybody whose reviewed and those of you who have reviewed numerous times. You know who you are. And last but never least, I have to thank Celestia for her never-ending patience. Seriously, I go by for three weeks without sending her a word of anything, and then suddenly I'll send her a million things all at once. And she magically makes everything better, and reassures me that the sun till rises in the east and sets in the west, and somehow she makes all this look effortless. So if any of y'all are about to thank me, remember half the credit goes to her.