Heros
Mr Ong has a nipple ring. Mr Ong lives under the stairs. Mr Ong has a greasy ponytail. Once day we went out to be bums, and we walked past the park. Standing under a bridge was God, and to our surprise he beckoned us to him, told us we were his children and gave us a magic bean. Mine was penk! Then God vanished and we were left in the park, now standing infront of a huge hole, so naturally, we jumped in…
"Fuck!" I yelled.
It was freezing cold! Then I remembered that I CANT SWIM!!!
"Help! Help! Im drowing!" I screamed hysterically.
But no-one saved me. Then I stood up and realised that the water was only up to my knees.
"Oh… crap!"
Like duh! Anyway, we got out, feeling stupid, when suddenly a voice yelled out
"Hey, pig fuckers, do you mind if I call you pig fuckers?"
"Fuck you chode sucker!"
Well, that was a mistake. When we turned around, we saw… Oh No! It was… THE SHIM!!! Oh-oh, we were screwed! We ran and ran and then we thought.
"OMG. Hello, this is a shim. Tell it that trees are blue."
"But trees arnt blue!"
"I know, it'll get confused and we can run away, quick, it's close!"
"Okay… TREES ARE BLUE!!!"
"Huh?" replied the shim. "Wot?"
"Ahhh fuck, it's a dumb shim! I kill you! Die! Die shim die!" I screamed.
"No, wait! That's… SUPER SHIM!" yelled this fat… thing… that had just appeared out of no-where.
"Who the fuck are you?"
"I'm… WONDER WANKER!" announced the fat… thing.
A Xena warcrying figure jumped down out of the trees, holding a double ended shiny red lightsabre.
"I'm Darth Maul!"
"No you're not, you're Toad from the Xmen, with your face painted to look like Darth Maul!"
"NO! IM DARTH MAUL! I AM NOT TOAD FROM THE XMEN DAMMNIT WONDER WANKER! IM GONNA KILL YOU AND SUPER SHIM WITH MY DOUBLE ENDED SHINY RED LIGHTSABRE!!! DIE!!!"
"Noooooooooooooooo I wont die, not here and not today!"
"Fine then. Screw you, I'm going home. Punce!"
Then from behind I saw a flash of light, I turned around and yelled out "Die!" and the fight began. I fought for evil, he fought for good, I killed him and he screamed like a shim! Now evil rules the world, I rule the world and you will all die. BEWARE!!!
Mr Ong has a nipple ring. Mr Ong lives under the stairs. Mr Ong has a greasy ponytail. Once day we went out to be bums, and we walked past the park. Standing under a bridge was God, and to our surprise he beckoned us to him, told us we were his children and gave us a magic bean. Mine was penk! Then God vanished and we were left in the park, now standing infront of a huge hole, so naturally, we jumped in…
"Fuck!" I yelled.
It was freezing cold! Then I remembered that I CANT SWIM!!!
"Help! Help! Im drowing!" I screamed hysterically.
But no-one saved me. Then I stood up and realised that the water was only up to my knees.
"Oh… crap!"
Like duh! Anyway, we got out, feeling stupid, when suddenly a voice yelled out
"Hey, pig fuckers, do you mind if I call you pig fuckers?"
"Fuck you chode sucker!"
Well, that was a mistake. When we turned around, we saw… Oh No! It was… THE SHIM!!! Oh-oh, we were screwed! We ran and ran and then we thought.
"OMG. Hello, this is a shim. Tell it that trees are blue."
"But trees arnt blue!"
"I know, it'll get confused and we can run away, quick, it's close!"
"Okay… TREES ARE BLUE!!!"
"Huh?" replied the shim. "Wot?"
"Ahhh fuck, it's a dumb shim! I kill you! Die! Die shim die!" I screamed.
"No, wait! That's… SUPER SHIM!" yelled this fat… thing… that had just appeared out of no-where.
"Who the fuck are you?"
"I'm… WONDER WANKER!" announced the fat… thing.
A Xena warcrying figure jumped down out of the trees, holding a double ended shiny red lightsabre.
"I'm Darth Maul!"
"No you're not, you're Toad from the Xmen, with your face painted to look like Darth Maul!"
"NO! IM DARTH MAUL! I AM NOT TOAD FROM THE XMEN DAMMNIT WONDER WANKER! IM GONNA KILL YOU AND SUPER SHIM WITH MY DOUBLE ENDED SHINY RED LIGHTSABRE!!! DIE!!!"
"Noooooooooooooooo I wont die, not here and not today!"
"Fine then. Screw you, I'm going home. Punce!"
Then from behind I saw a flash of light, I turned around and yelled out "Die!" and the fight began. I fought for evil, he fought for good, I killed him and he screamed like a shim! Now evil rules the world, I rule the world and you will all die. BEWARE!!!