"Once again we see our friends off on another journey, Ash, Misty, and Bro- HEY! What the heck!? Those aren't Ash, Misty and Brock!", the Narrator suddenly yells in protest, as he jumps up from his E-Z-chair.
"Right again, Mr. Narrator sir! You sure are smart!" T.B. Stormshot grins as she walks out from behind a tree and waves at the narrator. "Today, I, being the all-omnipotent being I am (Like Q!) have decided to take over the Pokemon universe to suit my own twisted purposes and pleasures. Perky D eh?"
The Narrator suddenly leans back in his easy chair, relaxing again. "Oh, a fanfiction author, one of THOSE, whatever, I don't care, nobody makes fun of the narrator anyway." He then pulls out a magazine and begins to read.
T.B. Stormshot then looks at a loss as she was hoping for some fightin' words. "Oh, well, uh... okay... but um, you should know something..."
The Narrator looks up from a magazine he had pulled out, "What?"
"I hate Pokemon!"
"Perky D, whatever." The Narrator shrugged as he went back to his magazine.
"Oh... well... Oookay..."
Pokeballs Z
By T.B. Stormshot
I Don't own Dragonball Z, and thank God, I don't own Pokemon.... actually no, cuz if I did own Pokemon, I'd have quite a bit of money by now... Darn...
"Once again we see our friends off on another journey, Yamcha, Bulma, and Piccolo, the three heroes of our story, find themselves inside a deep, deep forest, which in any other case, had they been lost, they would never, EVER... have gotten out... But luckily our friends have a map"
"Okay, who's got the map?!" Bulma yelled as she looked through all her things, including the broken capsules, the makeup kit in need of a refill, her case of various hairbrushes and combs, the little case of gel she never used, the extra pair of contacts she had just in case she lost the pair that made sure her eyes would ALWAYS be blue, and just about everything possible you could think of... except a map.
Bulma then swung around to face Piccolo, who had been trailing the whole day long in protest of being with Yamcha and Bulma. "YOU! YOU had the map! Therefore YOU got US lost! Damn it Piccolo, how are we supposed to find our way out of this stupid forest if YOU can't even read a map?!"
Piccolo, surprised by this outburst, then got that pissed look on his face we all know and love. "Hey! Don't look at me! It was HIS job to hold the map!" Piccolo yelled as he pointed at Yamcha. Yamcha looked shocked at Piccolo's treachery before hiding behind a tree.
Bulma turned to then unleash her wrath, but just before she could verbally KILL Yamcha, a shadow suddenly LEAPED out of the bushes and ONTO BULMA'S CHEST! Bulma then went totally white. "AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!! AAAAHH! AHH! AH... GET IT OFFA MEEEE!!!" Bulma screamed (loudly), as she sped off in circles trying to get whatever it was OFF of her. "HEELP!!!"
"Turrrlees!" the thing cried as it suddenly leapt off, obviously in pain from Bulma's high-pitched screaming.
Bulma took another look at the thing, before screaming (not quite as loudly) and speeding off to hide in Piccolo's cape.
"What IS that?" Yamcha asked in surprise as he looked at the odd animal in front of him.
"Get out of my cape!" Piccolo yelled as he tried to drag Bulma out of it, without much luck.
Yamcha pulled out his Dragodex to check.
"Turles. The. Tree-dwelling. Saiyamon. This Saiyamon, has the power, to spit out giant seed pods, which suck energy, from it's... opponent," the Dragodex said.
"Turrrrlessss...." the Turles yawned as it sat on a rock and ignored the three Saiyatrainers. It scratched at it's black hair with a almost human-like hand.
"Wow! What a COOL saiyamon! I'm gonna CATCH IT!" Yamcha yelled excitedly as he pulled out his saiyaballs. "Now which one to battle first...?" he he asked himself as he looked at his saiyaballs, all three of them.
"Yamcha, we have no time for this thing! We're lost in this stupid forest, and we need to find a way out, NOW," Piccolo told Yamcha, still trying to pull Bulma out of his cape (to no avail).
"I KNOW!" Yamcha yelled out excitedly as he jumped up and down, ignoring Piccolo who had STILL failed to get Bulma out. Yamcha quickly grew serious as he put the other saiyaballs back and held the other in his hand. "I choose you..."
"Yamcha, we don't have time for-" Piccolo yelled.
"KRILLIN!" Yamcha yelled, throwing it.
"Kriiiiiiiiiiiiill! Krill! Krill!" the Krillin squeaked. It jumped up and down wagging it's butt as if it had a tail. Which it didn't.
"He never listens..." Piccolo sighed angrily. "THEY NEVER LISTEN!!" He looked down at a moving bulge in his cape. "Get out of my CAPE!"
"Krillin! Use... SUPER DESTRUCTO DISK!!!!!" Yamcha yelled out heroically.
"Kriiiiilll!" Krillin yelled as he jumped towards his opponent, he lifted his small arms and concentrated. "Kriiiiiiiilll.... krilll.... krilll... KRILL!" He yelled as a SUPER DESTRUCTO DISK formed above his hands, he promptly threw it at the Turles with a heroic Kriiiiiilll!
Turles promptly dodged it.
"Krill?"
Turles jumped up and threw a seed pod at the stunned Krillin, which neatly hit him on the head and knocked him out. Turles proceeded to make a rasberry at Yamcha before disappearing into the bushes.
"Oh no! Krillin!" Yamcha yelled. "I know! You'll feel a WHOLE lot better in your tiny, windowless, green-house effected, SAIYABALL!" he yelled. "RETURN KRILLIN!" He yelled even more heroically before pointing the saiyaball at Krillin which instantly dragged the helpless creature into it's clutches.
"Haha! I have done it! Once again I know EXACTLY what to do!" Yamcha laughed as he got out his Dragodex. "Hm, but why couln't I catch that Turles. DRAGODEX, do YOU know??"
"The... Turles... is an... advanced species... of the... saiyan... genus... STUPID trainers... are unable... to... catch them..." the Dragodex replied.
"Gee whiz Dragodex! You almost sound like you're insulting me!" Yamcha replied in surprise.
"... I...am..."
"Hohoho! Piccolo! These things sound so REAL these days. If I didn't know this DRAGODEX for what it really was, a calculator with a funky, plastic mold, I might actually think it really WAS insulting me!"
"Shut up," Piccolo replied. He looked down at the shivering blob inside his cape. "Alright, it's GONE now! You can get OUT! Any TIME now!"
"I can't!" came a muffled voice from his cape.
"Well why the hell not??!" Piccolo swore.
"I'm lost!" the fearful voice replied.
While the next five minutes were spent in colorful swearing, however the company which produced "Saiyaballs", which was NOT FUNimation, simply dubbed this over in a weak attempt to show a seen of comedic laughter in it's place, similar to FUNimation's similarily weak attempt in which Piccolo attempts to introduce Gohan to the wilds of the outdoors, and instead becomes trapped on a rather high cliff, and as he watches over the boy, Piccolo neatly curses him, though was neatly FUNimized into thinking something rather positive and inspiring.
Of course the odd aggravated sneer that is placed upon his face as he thinks this positive and inspiring thought really takes the positiveness and inspiration right out of it.
Anyway...
Piccolo seethed angrily as he picked up his long, ravishing, eternally windy cape, and shook it harshly. Various change, an assortment of sticks, and a half-full bottle of water fell from it.
"I'm still lost in here! Help!" a muffled voice yelped.
Piccolo growled a few more things that would be best left unsaid, before shaken it again, this time MORE change, some rocks, a few small bones the others knew better then to inquire about, and Bulma fell out.
"Man, your cape is FREAKY! I almost thought I fell into another dimension or something!" Bulma told him nervously as she struggled to get up.
Piccolo shrugged and picked up the bottle of water and untwisted the cap before he replied, "What makes you think you didn't?" He then took a long swig.
Bulma coughed uncomfortably.
"AAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!" Yamcha suddenly yelled in surprise and shock, a look of pure horror written upon his face.
"What?!" Bulma shouted as she and Piccolo whipped their heads around for trouble.
"Nuttin' I just wanted your attention. I'm supposed to be the main character you know," Yamcha shrugged before grinning widely.
Piccolo then proceeded to get a very pissed off look on his face while Bulma neatly screamed.
Yamcha and Piccolo blinked before turning to Bulma. "What now?" Piccolo asked in annoyance.
"I just realized I'm stuck in this forest with YOU," Bulma cried.
Piccolo turned a rather pale-green as he pondered the fact of spending the rest of his life with the two idiots standing next to him.
"That's it. I'm finding a way out if it KILLS me," Piccolo decided out loud.
Bulma agreed while Yamcha cluelessly laughed at the various insults that his Dragodex was throwing at him. "Oh Dragodex!" Yamcha chuckled, "You're such a card!"
Suddenly Bulma screamed again.
"WHAT?!" Piccolo screeched. "We've already decided to find a way out! You AREN'T going to spend the rest of your life with us!"
"No! That isn't it!" Bulma gasped unhappily.
"Then WHAT?!" Piccolo yelled.
"I just realized we're standing on top of a hole!" Bulma squeaked unhappily.
Piccolo looked down and at that moment the hole chose to collapse. Coincidences... all around.
"Wow! That wasn't NEARLY as bad as I thought!" Bulma commented in surprise.
"If you don't get off of me RIGHT NOW, I SWEAR I'll-" Piccolo growled from underneath Bulma.
"Now how did THAT happen??" Yamcha asked with a certain amount of wonder on his face.
"HO!HO!HO!" came a sudden laughter from the top of the hole.
"HE!HE!HE!" came another cackle from above.
"Ho! Ho! Ho! He! He! He! Little Brown Jug how I love thee!" Yamcha suddenly sang.
"You know... I'm getting really sick of that..." the masculine 'hoing' voice sighed.
"Well, I could probably take over the hohohoing part-" a more feminine, but still quite obviously male voice spoke up.
"Shut up. I'd rather let a hundred people sing "Little Brown Jug" then let YOU take over," the masculine voice snorted.
"Come on! You've been a dictator ever since we started working together and I'm SICK of it! I'M JUST AS MANLY AS YOU ARE!" the feminine voice screamed.
"If you don't shut up and do this job right for a change I will make your life more of a living Hell then it already is. I will also start to do the cooking and force it down you throat. Before I take whatever little change we have left and go out for pizza, which I will not share," the more masculine voice said in a quiet, almost pleasant voice, "Now, do we have an understanding?"
"Absolutely!" the feminine voice said cheerfully.
"That's good. That's very good. Now-" the masculine one looked down into the pit trap they had set up and looked rather shocked. "What the-Where'd they go?!"
"Oh! Well we just decided it was really uncomfortable in that hole and wasn't really a place for a Saiyamon battle. So we climbed out while you were fighting!" Yamcha grinned cheerfully.
The shadowy masculine 'figure' growled and looked sideways at his equally shadowy feminine partner. "Afterwards... I'M making lunch..."
The feminine shadowy figure gulped.
"So let's Saiyabattle!" Yamcha shouted excitedly.
"Oh yippie. Now we get to witness a battle that I'm sure will be EXTREMELY Earth-shattering in MOMENTOUS proportions," Piccolo said sarcastically as he leaned onto a tree.
"Yes. I'm really excited," Bulma yawned, also leaning next to a tree.
"Oh, you are BOTH such CARDS!" Yamcha chuckled.
"WAIT! We can not battle!" the masculine voice called out suddenly.
"Well, why not??" Yamcha asked unhappily with a slightly puppy-dog like face.
"We can not battle... until... we've said... the motto..." the masculine figure said, his voice dropping down to a mere whisper.
"Well, I REALLY wanna Saiyabattle so say your motto and quick!", Yamcha hurried earnestly, practically jumping up and down.
"You CAN NOT RUSH THE MOTTO!" the masculine voice yelled angrily, with an almost hurt tone to his voice.
"I don't know WHY we do this stupid thing in the first place," the feminine voice muttered.
"Shut up," the masculine said calmly. "Now...
"PREPARE FOR TROUBLE!"
"AND MAKE THAT DOUBLE!" the feminine voice followed up.
"To save the universe from all that's evil!"
"To use our ki to undo the disheval,"
"To spread our strength across the land,"
"To stamp the cereal with a rocket-type brand!"
"Cell!" suddenly the masculine, shadowy figure became a masculine super-villainy type figure!
"Frieza!" suddenly the feminine, shadowy figure became a FEMININE super-villiany type figure!
"Team Soapbox- Blasting off at the speed of sound"
"Back off now or trouble will be found!"
Suddenly a giant hairball flung itself over the two heads and onto the ground! "Raaaad! We're on top of THIS mound!" it yelled.
"Gee whilickers! It's a TALKING Raditz!" Yamcha yelled in shock and amazement.
"Gee whilickers! Yamcha actually KNEW that Saiyamon without looking it up in his Dragodex!" Bulma exclaimed.
"Now we know the world really IS coming to an end," Piccolo said solemnly.
"Hah! So now we have said our motto and now we are ready to Saiyabattle!" Cell shouted confidently.
"Your motto really sucks," Piccolo told him bluntly.
"Shut up," Cell told him just as bluntly.
"You realize that half your motto announces you're going to spread love and joy across the land and make sure everyone lives in peace right?" Bulma asked.
"I told you!"Frieza yelled as Cell.
"I'll be making chocolate cake too for dessert," Cell growled, glaring sideways at Frieza.
"Hey, I have absolutely NOTHING against the motto. Absolutely nothing, sounds perfectly fine to me and it surely strikes terror into the hearts of all our foes," Frieza grinned widely as he backed slowly away.
"It sure struck terror into MY heart!" Yamcha agreed cheerfully. "Now, what the heck are you doing around here digging holes in the ground? Innocent people can get hurt that way!"
"Hah hah! We're going to steal all your Saiyamon, that's what!" Raditz cackled.
"Well I can't let you do that! Stealing is wrong and I'm totally against it! I fight for love and justice, and that means YOU!" Yamcha yelled angrily.
"Okay, if the author drags another crappy series into this already dumpy, class-F fan fic... I'm just going to have to kill her," Piccolo growled.
"I'll back you up on that one..." Frieza muttered.
"VEGETA! I CHOOSE YOOOOOUUU!" Yamcha yelled as he threw out a Saiyaball.
"Vegeeee!" Vegeta yelled as he burst out of the Saiyaball in a brilliant red light!
"Goooo BROLLY!" Cell yelled as he threw out his Saiyaball, a giant yellow-haired Brolly suddenly appeared out of the ball!
"Goooo NAPPA!" Frieza yelled as he threw out his Saiyaball, a some-what smaller, bald Nappa suddenly appeared out of the ball!
Yamcha gasped. "You FIENDS! TWO Saiyamon! That's against the rules!" he yelled virtuously.
"Yeah well... that's why we're the bad guys..." Cell shrugged.
"Well I'm going to beat you anyway because my Vegeta is really, really strong and probably much stronger than your Saiyamon!" Yamcha yelled mightily.
"Yeah! But is it stronger than both of our Saiyamon COMBINED??!" Cell shouted.
"Yes! Yes it probably is!" Yamcha confirmed.
Well then, how about Brolly, Nappa, and RADITZ combined?" Cell yelled pointing at Raditz.
"I DON'T know!" Yamcha shouted heroically.
"And you're not going to know either. I'm strictly a lover, not a fighter, "Raditz yawned, grooming his long, lush hair.
"Yeah well... I STILL bet your Vegeta is not as strong as our Brolly and Nappa combined!" Cell yelled angrily.
"Yeah? Well I bet you're wrong!" Yamcha shouted back.
"Well you're really stupid!" Cell retorted.
"No I'm not! You're the stupid one!" Yamcha screamed back.
"No I'm not! You are!"
"No, YOU are!"
"NO YOU ARE!"
"NO YOU ARE!"
"NO YOU ARE!"
"NO YOU ARE"
"NO-"
"Come on! This is supposed to be a SAIYABATTLE! STOP ACTING LIKE LITTLE WHINY BRATS AND FIGHT ALREADY!" Frieza screamed.
"Amen," Bulma agreed.
"And cookies, many, many cookies... PEANUT BUTTER cookies," Cell growled viciously as fingers curved into claws as he glared ferily at Frieza.
Frieza whimpered.
"Okay! Just to PROVE your Vegeta is not as strong as our Brolly and Nappa combined, I'll let YOU have the first move!" Cell yelled arrogantly.
"Hah! Your arrogance shall be your downfall Cell! I will ki-*make your Saiyamon faint* in ONE blow! Ha ha! Isn't that right guys?" Yamcha laughed arrogantly as he turned his head to glance back at his friends Piccolo and Bulma.
Piccolo and Bulma looked up distractedly from their cards. "What? Oh, yeah, whatever," Bulma told him before going back to concentrating on her cards. "Got any... twos?"
"Go fish," Piccolo yawned.
"Hah! See? While you have the power of evil and unfriendliness on YOUR side I have the power of LOVE and FRIENDLINESS on MY side! And that is why I will beat you Team Soapbox!" Yamcha yelled heroically.
"Well... I don't really give a damn," Cell told him calmly.
"Oh... well... alrighty... Vegeta! Use your Super Duper Big Bang Attack!" Yamcha yelled.
"Vegeeee..." Vegeta yawned as he pawed through his spiky hair. He then proceeded to lay down and take a nap.
"Hah hah! Obviously you are not a good trainer or certainly your Vegeta would have obeyed you! I have already won this battle! Hah hah!" Cell shouted arrogantly.
"If they don't shut up in about ten seconds I will NOT be held resposible for my actions, " Piccolo growled, crumpling his cards partially.
"Darn!" Yamcha growled angrily as he returned his sleeping Vegeta to the tiny Saiyaball. "Vegeta was most certainly my strongest Saiyamon and without him Team Soapbox will most certainly win! But still, I can not give up for that would go against the honor code of all Saiyamon trainers! I will PERSEVERE!" Yamcha yelled heroically as he punched the air and reached for a different Saiyaball. "Now I will choose my FIRST Saiyamon, which though is supposed to be really really mean and hard to tame-I, a rookie, have managed to do so anyway! I choose yooou-GOKU!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
Suddenly a bright-red light burst out of the Saiyaball and a Goku appeared! "Gokuuuuu!" it squealed, ready for a battle!
"Ha ha! Certainly you do not think you will beat us with such a tiny, third-class Saiyamon as that GOKU?!" Frieza laughed mightily.
"Shut up!" Cell yelled at Frieza. "Don't go off stealing my lines like that!"
"...sorry, just feeling sort of left out..." Frieza sniffed.
"Hah! You under estimate my Saiyamon! For this is but no ORDINARY Goku, but an extremely SPECIAL Goku! THE Goku! And it will beat your Saiyamon in one swipe!" Yamcha laughed heroically.
"Gokuuuuuuu!" Goku squealed challengingly.
"Brrrolly!" Brolly growled back.
"Naaaappa!" Nappa snarled just as meanly.
"Ha! We shall see about that! Brolly! Use your Super Duper "Fill-In-The-Blank attack NOOOW!" Cell yelled. "And Nappa! Use your Extra-Special "Unknown-Name" attack NOOOOOW!"
"But Nappa's MY Saiyamon!" Frieza whined.
"Just shut up Frieza! We know that you are absolutely no good as Saiyamon trainer and that it is quite obvious that I must make up for your lack of skill by doing everything BY MYSELF!" Cell yelled.
"Well you didn't have to SAY it..." Frieza muttered in annoyance as he crossed his arms.
Suddenly! Brolly and Nappa ATTACKED Goku with their Super Duper, Extra-Special ATTACKS! Luckily Goku dodged them in just the nick of time. "Gokuuuu!" he shouted in battle-cry.
"Hah! You miss! You did not expect such agility from my extremely SPECIAL Goku and now you will PAY because of it!" Yamcha shouted victoriously. "Goku! Use your Really Cool Super Blast ATTACK!"
"Goooooookuuuuu..." Goku yelled as he began to power up...
"Nappa?" Nappa spoke worriedly.
"BrollyBrrolly!" Brolly snapped back.
"Gokuuuuuuuuuuuu!" Goku yelled suddenly as he released his Really Cool Super Blast ATTACK!
Brolly and Nappa dodged it.
"Ha ha! You forget! Our Brolly and Nappa are still much stronger than your Goku! Even your extremely SPECIAL Goku! So they must naturally be much faster as well! Haha! You LOSE!" Cell yelled arrogantly.
"Oh no! I did not expect THAT to happen! Now what will we DO??!" Yamcha wailed as he dropped to his knees. "But wait! What is this?" he suddenly asked in surprise as a glowing yellow light suddenly covered his extremely SPECIAL Goku.
Suddenly-"Oh my GOODNESS! Goku has saiyavolved into a SUPER SAIYAMON!" Yamcha yelled excitedly as suddenly his extremely SPECIAL Goku became a bigger, better, yellow-haired, blue-eyes SUPER SAIYAMON!!
"Kame! Ka-Kamehame! Ha! Hame!" the SUPER SAIYAMON shouted.
"Well that was unexpected," Cell commented.
"Hah! Now we shall defeat you Team Soapbox! And you will never finish your dastardly deed!" Yamcha shouted triumphantly. "SUPER SAIYAMON! USE YOUR TOTALLY AWESOME HAWIIAN EMPEROR ATTACK!!!!!"
"Ka! Kame!" SUPER SAIYAMON agreed as he began to power up for his TOTALLY AWESOME HAWIIAN EMPEROR ATTACK," KaaaaaaMeeeeeeHaaaaaMeeeeee-"
"Na! Nappa!" Nappa whimpered.
"BrrrollyBrrroll..." Brolly simply muttered in annoyance.
"HAAAAAAA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" SUPER SAIYAMON yelled as suddenly a bright beam of light burst from his hands and against the two Saiyamon and, incidentally, their two trainers and talking Raditz, who then, incidentally, went blasting off into the sky.
"Daaaaaaaaaaammm-" Cell and Frieza screeched as they faded into the distance, then only showing a tiny bright twinkle in the sky.
"...and that's the end of that story," Yamcha grinned as he looked cheerfully back at his companions.
"You know what, a hoverbike isn't worth this kind of torture," Bulma commented.
"... I can't even remember WHY I'm traveling with you... PEOPLE.... at all..." Piccolo muttered as he tried to remember just why he WAS exactly...
"Oh SUPER SAIYAMON!" Yamcha shouted cheerfully as he wrapped his arms around his SUPER SAIYAMON. "I just KNEW you were an extremely SPECIAL Goku! And I was right because you saiyavolved into the most POWERFUL Saiyamon of ALL TIME! The SUPER SAIYAMON!"
Suddenly Super SAIYAMON de-saiyavolved into the extremely SPECIAL Goku. "Gokuuu?" Goku asked curiously, a slightly puzzled look on his extremely naive-looking face.
"Oh! SUPER SAIYAMON! You de-saiyavolved into my extremely SPECIAL Goku! How unexpected!" Yamcha said with a touch of disappointment in his voice, he brightened quickly though as a single tear of love and compassion twinkled down from his eye. "But that's okay! Because SUPER SAIYAMON still lives on in MY heart! And as long as I believe in SUPER SAIYAMON and myself, I am sure that this will not be the LAST we see of SUPER SAIYAMON," Yamcha shouted triumphantly.
"You know what... I just realized there IS no reason I'm traveling with you sick freaks," Piccolo suddenly said. He fumbled around in his cape before pulling out... a SAIYABALL!. And from out of the Saiyaball came...
"What the heck kind of FREAK Saiyamon is THAT?!" Yamcha asked with a touch of hideous disgust in his voice.
"Yeah! That thing looks like it's about to roll over and die! What IS it?! Some sort of malformed Hiyaa Dragon??!" Bulma exclaimed.
"You should put that thing down or something!" Yamcha agreed.
"Do I really give a damn? It can fly. I'm outta here," Piccolo snapped as he climbed unto the seemingly hideous Saiyamon and took off into the sky.
"Chaaaar..." the bright-orange, blue-winged, absolutely beastly Saiyamon agreed.
Bulma suddenly realized that without Piccolo, she was stuck with Yamcha. Alone. "WAAAAIIIITT! TAKE ME WITH YOU!" Bulma screamed as she took off running after Piccolo.
"... no ... hitchhikers..." Piccolo called off from the distance.
"Oh well," Yamcha shrugged as Bulma came trudging back with a rather depressed look on her face. "We can find our OWN way out of this seemingly endless forest, because together, we can do ANYTHING!"
Bulma cried.
"Hiya!" a cheerful voice shouted as a pasty white, red-cheeked midget popped out of the bushes.
'Hiya!" Yamcha greeted. "Who are you?"
"Why! My name is CHOUTZU! And I am a Saiyamon Watcher!" he said cheerfully as he pointed at his pudgy white chest.
"Hi Choutzu! The Saiyamon Watcher! Say, you wanna join our crew?" Yamcha asked cheerfully.
"Would I ever!" Choutzu grinned widely. "Now just stand reeeaal still, and I'll DRAW YOU!"
"Alrighty then! Say CHEESE Bulma!" Yamcha grinned happily as he pulled Bulma into the picture.
Bulma cried louder.
"You better finish ALL that BEEF stew... or YOU know what'll happen..." Cell growled angrily as he checked over a few other items simmering over the open coals of Team Soapbox's campfire.
"R-right..." Frieza stammered fearfully as he struggled to stuff another bite down. Oh what pain, what torture... and SO much more to go... the cookies, the cake, and all the other nasty surprises Cell had threatened him with after they had landed... Perfect.
Frieza sighed in content. Ah yes, the so-called disgusting, rottenly nauseating beef stew was actually probably the most heavenly thing he had ever eaten.
In fact, ALL of Cell's cooking was quite good... he just didn't know it...
"Heh heh heh heh..." Frieza chuckled evily under his breath. He was also the LAST person to let Cell KNOW about this hidden talent as well... Ah yes, both he and Raditz had agreed, as long as Cell did not know, and they goaded him on at least a few times a day... they wouldn't have to worry about starving for a very... long... time... "Heh heh... hahahahehehHAHHEAHHAHHAHEEHEHEHAHEA-"
"WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU LAUGHING ABOUT?!" Cell bellowed furiously.
"Nothing. Absolutely nothing," Frieza stopped, coughing uncomfortably.
"Well shut up. My SPECIAL... CHOCOLATE cake is almost ready... and you're damned well about to cram every little bit of it down that SCRAWNY neck of yours or else-" Cell started to threaten.
"I-I know," Frieza stammered... acting classes were definitely starting to pay off.
Frieza took a bite of a peanut butter cookie... and closed his eyes in simple bliss.
THE END
Author's Note* This has got to be one of THE most pointless things I've ever written... but it's so DAMN FUNNY!!!
"Right again, Mr. Narrator sir! You sure are smart!" T.B. Stormshot grins as she walks out from behind a tree and waves at the narrator. "Today, I, being the all-omnipotent being I am (Like Q!) have decided to take over the Pokemon universe to suit my own twisted purposes and pleasures. Perky D eh?"
The Narrator suddenly leans back in his easy chair, relaxing again. "Oh, a fanfiction author, one of THOSE, whatever, I don't care, nobody makes fun of the narrator anyway." He then pulls out a magazine and begins to read.
T.B. Stormshot then looks at a loss as she was hoping for some fightin' words. "Oh, well, uh... okay... but um, you should know something..."
The Narrator looks up from a magazine he had pulled out, "What?"
"I hate Pokemon!"
"Perky D, whatever." The Narrator shrugged as he went back to his magazine.
"Oh... well... Oookay..."
Pokeballs Z
By T.B. Stormshot
I Don't own Dragonball Z, and thank God, I don't own Pokemon.... actually no, cuz if I did own Pokemon, I'd have quite a bit of money by now... Darn...
"Once again we see our friends off on another journey, Yamcha, Bulma, and Piccolo, the three heroes of our story, find themselves inside a deep, deep forest, which in any other case, had they been lost, they would never, EVER... have gotten out... But luckily our friends have a map"
"Okay, who's got the map?!" Bulma yelled as she looked through all her things, including the broken capsules, the makeup kit in need of a refill, her case of various hairbrushes and combs, the little case of gel she never used, the extra pair of contacts she had just in case she lost the pair that made sure her eyes would ALWAYS be blue, and just about everything possible you could think of... except a map.
Bulma then swung around to face Piccolo, who had been trailing the whole day long in protest of being with Yamcha and Bulma. "YOU! YOU had the map! Therefore YOU got US lost! Damn it Piccolo, how are we supposed to find our way out of this stupid forest if YOU can't even read a map?!"
Piccolo, surprised by this outburst, then got that pissed look on his face we all know and love. "Hey! Don't look at me! It was HIS job to hold the map!" Piccolo yelled as he pointed at Yamcha. Yamcha looked shocked at Piccolo's treachery before hiding behind a tree.
Bulma turned to then unleash her wrath, but just before she could verbally KILL Yamcha, a shadow suddenly LEAPED out of the bushes and ONTO BULMA'S CHEST! Bulma then went totally white. "AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!! AAAAHH! AHH! AH... GET IT OFFA MEEEE!!!" Bulma screamed (loudly), as she sped off in circles trying to get whatever it was OFF of her. "HEELP!!!"
"Turrrlees!" the thing cried as it suddenly leapt off, obviously in pain from Bulma's high-pitched screaming.
Bulma took another look at the thing, before screaming (not quite as loudly) and speeding off to hide in Piccolo's cape.
"What IS that?" Yamcha asked in surprise as he looked at the odd animal in front of him.
"Get out of my cape!" Piccolo yelled as he tried to drag Bulma out of it, without much luck.
Yamcha pulled out his Dragodex to check.
"Turles. The. Tree-dwelling. Saiyamon. This Saiyamon, has the power, to spit out giant seed pods, which suck energy, from it's... opponent," the Dragodex said.
"Turrrrlessss...." the Turles yawned as it sat on a rock and ignored the three Saiyatrainers. It scratched at it's black hair with a almost human-like hand.
"Wow! What a COOL saiyamon! I'm gonna CATCH IT!" Yamcha yelled excitedly as he pulled out his saiyaballs. "Now which one to battle first...?" he he asked himself as he looked at his saiyaballs, all three of them.
"Yamcha, we have no time for this thing! We're lost in this stupid forest, and we need to find a way out, NOW," Piccolo told Yamcha, still trying to pull Bulma out of his cape (to no avail).
"I KNOW!" Yamcha yelled out excitedly as he jumped up and down, ignoring Piccolo who had STILL failed to get Bulma out. Yamcha quickly grew serious as he put the other saiyaballs back and held the other in his hand. "I choose you..."
"Yamcha, we don't have time for-" Piccolo yelled.
"KRILLIN!" Yamcha yelled, throwing it.
"Kriiiiiiiiiiiiill! Krill! Krill!" the Krillin squeaked. It jumped up and down wagging it's butt as if it had a tail. Which it didn't.
"He never listens..." Piccolo sighed angrily. "THEY NEVER LISTEN!!" He looked down at a moving bulge in his cape. "Get out of my CAPE!"
"Krillin! Use... SUPER DESTRUCTO DISK!!!!!" Yamcha yelled out heroically.
"Kriiiiilll!" Krillin yelled as he jumped towards his opponent, he lifted his small arms and concentrated. "Kriiiiiiiilll.... krilll.... krilll... KRILL!" He yelled as a SUPER DESTRUCTO DISK formed above his hands, he promptly threw it at the Turles with a heroic Kriiiiiilll!
Turles promptly dodged it.
"Krill?"
Turles jumped up and threw a seed pod at the stunned Krillin, which neatly hit him on the head and knocked him out. Turles proceeded to make a rasberry at Yamcha before disappearing into the bushes.
"Oh no! Krillin!" Yamcha yelled. "I know! You'll feel a WHOLE lot better in your tiny, windowless, green-house effected, SAIYABALL!" he yelled. "RETURN KRILLIN!" He yelled even more heroically before pointing the saiyaball at Krillin which instantly dragged the helpless creature into it's clutches.
"Haha! I have done it! Once again I know EXACTLY what to do!" Yamcha laughed as he got out his Dragodex. "Hm, but why couln't I catch that Turles. DRAGODEX, do YOU know??"
"The... Turles... is an... advanced species... of the... saiyan... genus... STUPID trainers... are unable... to... catch them..." the Dragodex replied.
"Gee whiz Dragodex! You almost sound like you're insulting me!" Yamcha replied in surprise.
"... I...am..."
"Hohoho! Piccolo! These things sound so REAL these days. If I didn't know this DRAGODEX for what it really was, a calculator with a funky, plastic mold, I might actually think it really WAS insulting me!"
"Shut up," Piccolo replied. He looked down at the shivering blob inside his cape. "Alright, it's GONE now! You can get OUT! Any TIME now!"
"I can't!" came a muffled voice from his cape.
"Well why the hell not??!" Piccolo swore.
"I'm lost!" the fearful voice replied.
While the next five minutes were spent in colorful swearing, however the company which produced "Saiyaballs", which was NOT FUNimation, simply dubbed this over in a weak attempt to show a seen of comedic laughter in it's place, similar to FUNimation's similarily weak attempt in which Piccolo attempts to introduce Gohan to the wilds of the outdoors, and instead becomes trapped on a rather high cliff, and as he watches over the boy, Piccolo neatly curses him, though was neatly FUNimized into thinking something rather positive and inspiring.
Of course the odd aggravated sneer that is placed upon his face as he thinks this positive and inspiring thought really takes the positiveness and inspiration right out of it.
Anyway...
Piccolo seethed angrily as he picked up his long, ravishing, eternally windy cape, and shook it harshly. Various change, an assortment of sticks, and a half-full bottle of water fell from it.
"I'm still lost in here! Help!" a muffled voice yelped.
Piccolo growled a few more things that would be best left unsaid, before shaken it again, this time MORE change, some rocks, a few small bones the others knew better then to inquire about, and Bulma fell out.
"Man, your cape is FREAKY! I almost thought I fell into another dimension or something!" Bulma told him nervously as she struggled to get up.
Piccolo shrugged and picked up the bottle of water and untwisted the cap before he replied, "What makes you think you didn't?" He then took a long swig.
Bulma coughed uncomfortably.
"AAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!" Yamcha suddenly yelled in surprise and shock, a look of pure horror written upon his face.
"What?!" Bulma shouted as she and Piccolo whipped their heads around for trouble.
"Nuttin' I just wanted your attention. I'm supposed to be the main character you know," Yamcha shrugged before grinning widely.
Piccolo then proceeded to get a very pissed off look on his face while Bulma neatly screamed.
Yamcha and Piccolo blinked before turning to Bulma. "What now?" Piccolo asked in annoyance.
"I just realized I'm stuck in this forest with YOU," Bulma cried.
Piccolo turned a rather pale-green as he pondered the fact of spending the rest of his life with the two idiots standing next to him.
"That's it. I'm finding a way out if it KILLS me," Piccolo decided out loud.
Bulma agreed while Yamcha cluelessly laughed at the various insults that his Dragodex was throwing at him. "Oh Dragodex!" Yamcha chuckled, "You're such a card!"
Suddenly Bulma screamed again.
"WHAT?!" Piccolo screeched. "We've already decided to find a way out! You AREN'T going to spend the rest of your life with us!"
"No! That isn't it!" Bulma gasped unhappily.
"Then WHAT?!" Piccolo yelled.
"I just realized we're standing on top of a hole!" Bulma squeaked unhappily.
Piccolo looked down and at that moment the hole chose to collapse. Coincidences... all around.
"Wow! That wasn't NEARLY as bad as I thought!" Bulma commented in surprise.
"If you don't get off of me RIGHT NOW, I SWEAR I'll-" Piccolo growled from underneath Bulma.
"Now how did THAT happen??" Yamcha asked with a certain amount of wonder on his face.
"HO!HO!HO!" came a sudden laughter from the top of the hole.
"HE!HE!HE!" came another cackle from above.
"Ho! Ho! Ho! He! He! He! Little Brown Jug how I love thee!" Yamcha suddenly sang.
"You know... I'm getting really sick of that..." the masculine 'hoing' voice sighed.
"Well, I could probably take over the hohohoing part-" a more feminine, but still quite obviously male voice spoke up.
"Shut up. I'd rather let a hundred people sing "Little Brown Jug" then let YOU take over," the masculine voice snorted.
"Come on! You've been a dictator ever since we started working together and I'm SICK of it! I'M JUST AS MANLY AS YOU ARE!" the feminine voice screamed.
"If you don't shut up and do this job right for a change I will make your life more of a living Hell then it already is. I will also start to do the cooking and force it down you throat. Before I take whatever little change we have left and go out for pizza, which I will not share," the more masculine voice said in a quiet, almost pleasant voice, "Now, do we have an understanding?"
"Absolutely!" the feminine voice said cheerfully.
"That's good. That's very good. Now-" the masculine one looked down into the pit trap they had set up and looked rather shocked. "What the-Where'd they go?!"
"Oh! Well we just decided it was really uncomfortable in that hole and wasn't really a place for a Saiyamon battle. So we climbed out while you were fighting!" Yamcha grinned cheerfully.
The shadowy masculine 'figure' growled and looked sideways at his equally shadowy feminine partner. "Afterwards... I'M making lunch..."
The feminine shadowy figure gulped.
"So let's Saiyabattle!" Yamcha shouted excitedly.
"Oh yippie. Now we get to witness a battle that I'm sure will be EXTREMELY Earth-shattering in MOMENTOUS proportions," Piccolo said sarcastically as he leaned onto a tree.
"Yes. I'm really excited," Bulma yawned, also leaning next to a tree.
"Oh, you are BOTH such CARDS!" Yamcha chuckled.
"WAIT! We can not battle!" the masculine voice called out suddenly.
"Well, why not??" Yamcha asked unhappily with a slightly puppy-dog like face.
"We can not battle... until... we've said... the motto..." the masculine figure said, his voice dropping down to a mere whisper.
"Well, I REALLY wanna Saiyabattle so say your motto and quick!", Yamcha hurried earnestly, practically jumping up and down.
"You CAN NOT RUSH THE MOTTO!" the masculine voice yelled angrily, with an almost hurt tone to his voice.
"I don't know WHY we do this stupid thing in the first place," the feminine voice muttered.
"Shut up," the masculine said calmly. "Now...
"PREPARE FOR TROUBLE!"
"AND MAKE THAT DOUBLE!" the feminine voice followed up.
"To save the universe from all that's evil!"
"To use our ki to undo the disheval,"
"To spread our strength across the land,"
"To stamp the cereal with a rocket-type brand!"
"Cell!" suddenly the masculine, shadowy figure became a masculine super-villainy type figure!
"Frieza!" suddenly the feminine, shadowy figure became a FEMININE super-villiany type figure!
"Team Soapbox- Blasting off at the speed of sound"
"Back off now or trouble will be found!"
Suddenly a giant hairball flung itself over the two heads and onto the ground! "Raaaad! We're on top of THIS mound!" it yelled.
"Gee whilickers! It's a TALKING Raditz!" Yamcha yelled in shock and amazement.
"Gee whilickers! Yamcha actually KNEW that Saiyamon without looking it up in his Dragodex!" Bulma exclaimed.
"Now we know the world really IS coming to an end," Piccolo said solemnly.
"Hah! So now we have said our motto and now we are ready to Saiyabattle!" Cell shouted confidently.
"Your motto really sucks," Piccolo told him bluntly.
"Shut up," Cell told him just as bluntly.
"You realize that half your motto announces you're going to spread love and joy across the land and make sure everyone lives in peace right?" Bulma asked.
"I told you!"Frieza yelled as Cell.
"I'll be making chocolate cake too for dessert," Cell growled, glaring sideways at Frieza.
"Hey, I have absolutely NOTHING against the motto. Absolutely nothing, sounds perfectly fine to me and it surely strikes terror into the hearts of all our foes," Frieza grinned widely as he backed slowly away.
"It sure struck terror into MY heart!" Yamcha agreed cheerfully. "Now, what the heck are you doing around here digging holes in the ground? Innocent people can get hurt that way!"
"Hah hah! We're going to steal all your Saiyamon, that's what!" Raditz cackled.
"Well I can't let you do that! Stealing is wrong and I'm totally against it! I fight for love and justice, and that means YOU!" Yamcha yelled angrily.
"Okay, if the author drags another crappy series into this already dumpy, class-F fan fic... I'm just going to have to kill her," Piccolo growled.
"I'll back you up on that one..." Frieza muttered.
"VEGETA! I CHOOSE YOOOOOUUU!" Yamcha yelled as he threw out a Saiyaball.
"Vegeeee!" Vegeta yelled as he burst out of the Saiyaball in a brilliant red light!
"Goooo BROLLY!" Cell yelled as he threw out his Saiyaball, a giant yellow-haired Brolly suddenly appeared out of the ball!
"Goooo NAPPA!" Frieza yelled as he threw out his Saiyaball, a some-what smaller, bald Nappa suddenly appeared out of the ball!
Yamcha gasped. "You FIENDS! TWO Saiyamon! That's against the rules!" he yelled virtuously.
"Yeah well... that's why we're the bad guys..." Cell shrugged.
"Well I'm going to beat you anyway because my Vegeta is really, really strong and probably much stronger than your Saiyamon!" Yamcha yelled mightily.
"Yeah! But is it stronger than both of our Saiyamon COMBINED??!" Cell shouted.
"Yes! Yes it probably is!" Yamcha confirmed.
Well then, how about Brolly, Nappa, and RADITZ combined?" Cell yelled pointing at Raditz.
"I DON'T know!" Yamcha shouted heroically.
"And you're not going to know either. I'm strictly a lover, not a fighter, "Raditz yawned, grooming his long, lush hair.
"Yeah well... I STILL bet your Vegeta is not as strong as our Brolly and Nappa combined!" Cell yelled angrily.
"Yeah? Well I bet you're wrong!" Yamcha shouted back.
"Well you're really stupid!" Cell retorted.
"No I'm not! You're the stupid one!" Yamcha screamed back.
"No I'm not! You are!"
"No, YOU are!"
"NO YOU ARE!"
"NO YOU ARE!"
"NO YOU ARE!"
"NO YOU ARE"
"NO-"
"Come on! This is supposed to be a SAIYABATTLE! STOP ACTING LIKE LITTLE WHINY BRATS AND FIGHT ALREADY!" Frieza screamed.
"Amen," Bulma agreed.
"And cookies, many, many cookies... PEANUT BUTTER cookies," Cell growled viciously as fingers curved into claws as he glared ferily at Frieza.
Frieza whimpered.
"Okay! Just to PROVE your Vegeta is not as strong as our Brolly and Nappa combined, I'll let YOU have the first move!" Cell yelled arrogantly.
"Hah! Your arrogance shall be your downfall Cell! I will ki-*make your Saiyamon faint* in ONE blow! Ha ha! Isn't that right guys?" Yamcha laughed arrogantly as he turned his head to glance back at his friends Piccolo and Bulma.
Piccolo and Bulma looked up distractedly from their cards. "What? Oh, yeah, whatever," Bulma told him before going back to concentrating on her cards. "Got any... twos?"
"Go fish," Piccolo yawned.
"Hah! See? While you have the power of evil and unfriendliness on YOUR side I have the power of LOVE and FRIENDLINESS on MY side! And that is why I will beat you Team Soapbox!" Yamcha yelled heroically.
"Well... I don't really give a damn," Cell told him calmly.
"Oh... well... alrighty... Vegeta! Use your Super Duper Big Bang Attack!" Yamcha yelled.
"Vegeeee..." Vegeta yawned as he pawed through his spiky hair. He then proceeded to lay down and take a nap.
"Hah hah! Obviously you are not a good trainer or certainly your Vegeta would have obeyed you! I have already won this battle! Hah hah!" Cell shouted arrogantly.
"If they don't shut up in about ten seconds I will NOT be held resposible for my actions, " Piccolo growled, crumpling his cards partially.
"Darn!" Yamcha growled angrily as he returned his sleeping Vegeta to the tiny Saiyaball. "Vegeta was most certainly my strongest Saiyamon and without him Team Soapbox will most certainly win! But still, I can not give up for that would go against the honor code of all Saiyamon trainers! I will PERSEVERE!" Yamcha yelled heroically as he punched the air and reached for a different Saiyaball. "Now I will choose my FIRST Saiyamon, which though is supposed to be really really mean and hard to tame-I, a rookie, have managed to do so anyway! I choose yooou-GOKU!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
Suddenly a bright-red light burst out of the Saiyaball and a Goku appeared! "Gokuuuuu!" it squealed, ready for a battle!
"Ha ha! Certainly you do not think you will beat us with such a tiny, third-class Saiyamon as that GOKU?!" Frieza laughed mightily.
"Shut up!" Cell yelled at Frieza. "Don't go off stealing my lines like that!"
"...sorry, just feeling sort of left out..." Frieza sniffed.
"Hah! You under estimate my Saiyamon! For this is but no ORDINARY Goku, but an extremely SPECIAL Goku! THE Goku! And it will beat your Saiyamon in one swipe!" Yamcha laughed heroically.
"Gokuuuuuuu!" Goku squealed challengingly.
"Brrrolly!" Brolly growled back.
"Naaaappa!" Nappa snarled just as meanly.
"Ha! We shall see about that! Brolly! Use your Super Duper "Fill-In-The-Blank attack NOOOW!" Cell yelled. "And Nappa! Use your Extra-Special "Unknown-Name" attack NOOOOOW!"
"But Nappa's MY Saiyamon!" Frieza whined.
"Just shut up Frieza! We know that you are absolutely no good as Saiyamon trainer and that it is quite obvious that I must make up for your lack of skill by doing everything BY MYSELF!" Cell yelled.
"Well you didn't have to SAY it..." Frieza muttered in annoyance as he crossed his arms.
Suddenly! Brolly and Nappa ATTACKED Goku with their Super Duper, Extra-Special ATTACKS! Luckily Goku dodged them in just the nick of time. "Gokuuuu!" he shouted in battle-cry.
"Hah! You miss! You did not expect such agility from my extremely SPECIAL Goku and now you will PAY because of it!" Yamcha shouted victoriously. "Goku! Use your Really Cool Super Blast ATTACK!"
"Goooooookuuuuu..." Goku yelled as he began to power up...
"Nappa?" Nappa spoke worriedly.
"BrollyBrrolly!" Brolly snapped back.
"Gokuuuuuuuuuuuu!" Goku yelled suddenly as he released his Really Cool Super Blast ATTACK!
Brolly and Nappa dodged it.
"Ha ha! You forget! Our Brolly and Nappa are still much stronger than your Goku! Even your extremely SPECIAL Goku! So they must naturally be much faster as well! Haha! You LOSE!" Cell yelled arrogantly.
"Oh no! I did not expect THAT to happen! Now what will we DO??!" Yamcha wailed as he dropped to his knees. "But wait! What is this?" he suddenly asked in surprise as a glowing yellow light suddenly covered his extremely SPECIAL Goku.
Suddenly-"Oh my GOODNESS! Goku has saiyavolved into a SUPER SAIYAMON!" Yamcha yelled excitedly as suddenly his extremely SPECIAL Goku became a bigger, better, yellow-haired, blue-eyes SUPER SAIYAMON!!
"Kame! Ka-Kamehame! Ha! Hame!" the SUPER SAIYAMON shouted.
"Well that was unexpected," Cell commented.
"Hah! Now we shall defeat you Team Soapbox! And you will never finish your dastardly deed!" Yamcha shouted triumphantly. "SUPER SAIYAMON! USE YOUR TOTALLY AWESOME HAWIIAN EMPEROR ATTACK!!!!!"
"Ka! Kame!" SUPER SAIYAMON agreed as he began to power up for his TOTALLY AWESOME HAWIIAN EMPEROR ATTACK," KaaaaaaMeeeeeeHaaaaaMeeeeee-"
"Na! Nappa!" Nappa whimpered.
"BrrrollyBrrroll..." Brolly simply muttered in annoyance.
"HAAAAAAA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" SUPER SAIYAMON yelled as suddenly a bright beam of light burst from his hands and against the two Saiyamon and, incidentally, their two trainers and talking Raditz, who then, incidentally, went blasting off into the sky.
"Daaaaaaaaaaammm-" Cell and Frieza screeched as they faded into the distance, then only showing a tiny bright twinkle in the sky.
"...and that's the end of that story," Yamcha grinned as he looked cheerfully back at his companions.
"You know what, a hoverbike isn't worth this kind of torture," Bulma commented.
"... I can't even remember WHY I'm traveling with you... PEOPLE.... at all..." Piccolo muttered as he tried to remember just why he WAS exactly...
"Oh SUPER SAIYAMON!" Yamcha shouted cheerfully as he wrapped his arms around his SUPER SAIYAMON. "I just KNEW you were an extremely SPECIAL Goku! And I was right because you saiyavolved into the most POWERFUL Saiyamon of ALL TIME! The SUPER SAIYAMON!"
Suddenly Super SAIYAMON de-saiyavolved into the extremely SPECIAL Goku. "Gokuuu?" Goku asked curiously, a slightly puzzled look on his extremely naive-looking face.
"Oh! SUPER SAIYAMON! You de-saiyavolved into my extremely SPECIAL Goku! How unexpected!" Yamcha said with a touch of disappointment in his voice, he brightened quickly though as a single tear of love and compassion twinkled down from his eye. "But that's okay! Because SUPER SAIYAMON still lives on in MY heart! And as long as I believe in SUPER SAIYAMON and myself, I am sure that this will not be the LAST we see of SUPER SAIYAMON," Yamcha shouted triumphantly.
"You know what... I just realized there IS no reason I'm traveling with you sick freaks," Piccolo suddenly said. He fumbled around in his cape before pulling out... a SAIYABALL!. And from out of the Saiyaball came...
"What the heck kind of FREAK Saiyamon is THAT?!" Yamcha asked with a touch of hideous disgust in his voice.
"Yeah! That thing looks like it's about to roll over and die! What IS it?! Some sort of malformed Hiyaa Dragon??!" Bulma exclaimed.
"You should put that thing down or something!" Yamcha agreed.
"Do I really give a damn? It can fly. I'm outta here," Piccolo snapped as he climbed unto the seemingly hideous Saiyamon and took off into the sky.
"Chaaaar..." the bright-orange, blue-winged, absolutely beastly Saiyamon agreed.
Bulma suddenly realized that without Piccolo, she was stuck with Yamcha. Alone. "WAAAAIIIITT! TAKE ME WITH YOU!" Bulma screamed as she took off running after Piccolo.
"... no ... hitchhikers..." Piccolo called off from the distance.
"Oh well," Yamcha shrugged as Bulma came trudging back with a rather depressed look on her face. "We can find our OWN way out of this seemingly endless forest, because together, we can do ANYTHING!"
Bulma cried.
"Hiya!" a cheerful voice shouted as a pasty white, red-cheeked midget popped out of the bushes.
'Hiya!" Yamcha greeted. "Who are you?"
"Why! My name is CHOUTZU! And I am a Saiyamon Watcher!" he said cheerfully as he pointed at his pudgy white chest.
"Hi Choutzu! The Saiyamon Watcher! Say, you wanna join our crew?" Yamcha asked cheerfully.
"Would I ever!" Choutzu grinned widely. "Now just stand reeeaal still, and I'll DRAW YOU!"
"Alrighty then! Say CHEESE Bulma!" Yamcha grinned happily as he pulled Bulma into the picture.
Bulma cried louder.
"You better finish ALL that BEEF stew... or YOU know what'll happen..." Cell growled angrily as he checked over a few other items simmering over the open coals of Team Soapbox's campfire.
"R-right..." Frieza stammered fearfully as he struggled to stuff another bite down. Oh what pain, what torture... and SO much more to go... the cookies, the cake, and all the other nasty surprises Cell had threatened him with after they had landed... Perfect.
Frieza sighed in content. Ah yes, the so-called disgusting, rottenly nauseating beef stew was actually probably the most heavenly thing he had ever eaten.
In fact, ALL of Cell's cooking was quite good... he just didn't know it...
"Heh heh heh heh..." Frieza chuckled evily under his breath. He was also the LAST person to let Cell KNOW about this hidden talent as well... Ah yes, both he and Raditz had agreed, as long as Cell did not know, and they goaded him on at least a few times a day... they wouldn't have to worry about starving for a very... long... time... "Heh heh... hahahahehehHAHHEAHHAHHAHEEHEHEHAHEA-"
"WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU LAUGHING ABOUT?!" Cell bellowed furiously.
"Nothing. Absolutely nothing," Frieza stopped, coughing uncomfortably.
"Well shut up. My SPECIAL... CHOCOLATE cake is almost ready... and you're damned well about to cram every little bit of it down that SCRAWNY neck of yours or else-" Cell started to threaten.
"I-I know," Frieza stammered... acting classes were definitely starting to pay off.
Frieza took a bite of a peanut butter cookie... and closed his eyes in simple bliss.
THE END
Author's Note* This has got to be one of THE most pointless things I've ever written... but it's so DAMN FUNNY!!!