Later that night, in a room lit with stolen lanterns, around a round stolen table, a man with long blue-black hair and a scar down his cheek grins and recites the following ritual greeting:
"Kombawa!
Who is it?
Why, it is Koji-san's money! Can we come live in Chichiri-kun's poker pile, since Chichiri-kun has called Koji-san's pathetic bluff ?
Sure! I think that would be fucking cool no da!
Arigato!"
Chichiri ended the routine by sliding his winnings into his transformed lap. Then he transformed back into himself in a puff of smoke. There was stunned silence at the uncanniness of the imitation, and then the bandits burst into raucuous laughter.
"Oh, what-EVER, Chichiri-san." Koji laughed, wiping a tear from his eye. "I've only done that greeting in front of you, like, twice."
"Yeah, well, he's got you down cold, man." Tasuki chuckled. "That was damn scary. And Chichiri! Language! Man, I never thought I would ever hear "fucking" and "no da" in the same--- SHUT UP, NURIKO!"
Everyone in the room paused for a second.
"Anyway." Koji continued smoothly, not even sparing Tasuki a strange glance at this point.
"How is it you've been winning every third hand, and Genrou's been winning the rest? I'm getting killed over here. Is there something we don't know about Seishi powers and poker? Like has Suzaku granted you guys amazing cheating powers?"
"I am but an honest monk, who just happens to be in "the zone" na no da." Chichiri stated, his mask a picture of innocence, "However, Tasuki is definitely cheating no da."
Chichiri grinned at the red head, who quickly looked down at the table. This made it look like Tasuki had indeed been cheating, which was sort of unfair, since he had only looked down to hide his blushing reaction to Chichiri's wide smile. But it wasn't that unfair, since Nuriko actually had been helping Tasuki cheat this whole time. (Tasuki had resigned himself to Nuriko's visitation rights to his brain, and was making the most of it.)
"Oh, by the way, Chichiri-san," Benjiro tried to sound casual. "I don't suppose you can make yourself look like... Emperor Hotohori?"
"Well, theoretically no da..." Chichiri began slowly, wary of the way Benjiro was looking at him now.
"Wait, 'theoretically'?" Tasuki interrupted with a wicked grin. "I heard you did it for like two days once." And this was an evil thing of Tasuki to say, because now Benjiro was practically salivating over poor Chichiri. But Tasuki realized that we all must pay for our evil deeds when Nuriko exclaimed and began lamenting (while describing in great detail) all of the sexual escapades Chichiri's shapeshifting abilities could have provided him with, if only he'd thought of it while he were still alive, and further describing all the different people Tasuki could now have sex with if he could just get Chichiri to shapeshift into them, and then Nuriko detailed about a dozen other unsavory plans all of which just made Tasuki ready to kill him. Again.
The End. Again.
A/N:
1. The bandits are playing Pai-Gow, which is a really old chinese gambling game, using tiles. However, we Americans have a bastardized version of it called Pai-Gow poker, which is played with cards representing the tiles, which is why I'm using Pai-Gow and poker interchangeably, and pretty much treating the gameplay like poker. But they are using tiles. Just in case you guys are keeping score.
2. That first part up there is supposed to be Chichiri morphing into Koji and doing the "Koji Entrance Routine", which sounded to me like something Chichiri would do. Or maybe it's just the voice actor that makes me think that. Whatever. It's my epilogue.