Xo growls as Courage runs screaming through the bathroom door.
"RRRGH I can't WAIT till the newbys are all out of the house..CHELSEA! I THOUGHT YOU GOT RID OF THEM ALREADY!"
*cue ramses theme, Chelsea the trench coat girl is standing under the bathroom window and lightning flashes.
"Xo, why are you naked?"
"I was takin' a shower fer pete's sake, just cos I am not human doesn't mean I haven't any hygeine."
"Your grossing Dead Kitty out with your nudeyness.."
"WILL YOU FORGET THE NUDITY CRAP!"shouts Xo. "JUST GET RID OF THE NEWBYS! You know why i brought you here. SERVE YOUR PURPOSE!"
"Sorry. I don't do in ANYONE until I get the green."
"WHAAAAAT!?"
"No cash, no kill."
"RRRRRG! I AM SAVING THAT MONEY FOR A LENORE COMIC YOU BIG FAT STINKY LOOZER POOZER STOOPY!"
"Stoopy? _O"
"Er..YEAH!"
"Xo, pay me now-
*takes out butcher knife, cue ramses theme again*O.O!!!
-or suffer the consequences."snarls Chelsea.
".SIIIIIIGH. How much do ya want?"
* * *
Courage is racing down the hallway trying to get to the attic stairs- "PANT PANT PANT-AAAAAAA!"
The same smoky lady(ghost actually) from before is sitting on the stairs reading a fashion magazine. She is very pretty( she was a model actually.)and frowns angrilly at him. "I THOUGHT WE GOT RID OF ALL YOU BLASTED NEWBYS!*snarls*"
"AAAAAAH!*screams and runs through the ghost's transparent body leaving a dog-hole through her bosom and races up the stairs*
":s...HEY! GET BACK HERE! YOU LIDDLE-
Courage screams all the way up the stairs and slams the door and pants hard. Her voice comes from behind the door-
"HEY! YOU OPEN THIS DOOR RIGHT NOW YOU STUPID ANIMAL!"
"AIEEE! WHATDOIDO!WHATDOIDO!?"
Grey lady continues to pound on the door with her fists-
"YOU BETTER LET ME IN! I'M A GHOST!! UHM..YEAH! SO LET ME IN YOU STUPID DOG!"
"AAAAAAA!....*Grey lady continues to bang on the door, and doesn't walk through. Courage raises an eyebrow.* "huh? ~_'"
Grey lady continues to bang on the door and rant and rave at Courage. He stares oddly for a moment and then shrugs at the audience.
He rushes off to the computer in the corner of the room and begins to type furiously.
"Freaks..attacking..the farm! So very many..FREAKS! WHATDOIDO! *ENTER*"
"Freaks after your farm?" drawls the computer with so much sarcasm its frightening. "How unusual."
"BABABAA, ITS SO MANY!!! ALL AT ONCE! ITS LIKE A CLUB OR SOMETHING! HELP! *ENTER*"
"So sorry. You're going to have to be more specific."
"...sheesh. Some advanced technology! *grumbles and types faster* VAMPIRES WITH GREEN HAIR AND TINY TSHIRTS, LITTLE GIRLS WITH DEAD CATS AND KNIVES IN TRENCH COATS, GHOSTS WITH LARGE...THINGS, NAKED PIXIE-DEMONS IN THE SHOWER SINGING RAINSONGS-OOOOOooogg!!! DOSOMETHING!! *ENTER!*"
"Lemme GUESS. Smoking parsely again old boy?" it types back. "That is SOOO out.."it drawls.
"Oh thanks a LOT.." .P"
"WHY YOU!!!"
"AAAAAAA!" Courage screams and rushes downstairs. He is halfway down the stairs when suddenly he comes screeching to a halt to take a few breaths-"pant pant pant..where was I? Oh yeah-AAAAAAaaaaaaa!"
He finsishes his screaming then runs down to the left of the corridor, while Grey lady flies off to the right-
"NOW WHERE'D THAT STUPID NEWBY GET TOO!?"
Courage pants hard and rushes down to the cellar and slams the door.
"PHEWWW! pant pant pant.." he sits down in the dark to rest when suddenly he hears some faint voices.
"-whaddya mean the newbys are STILL ALIVE?"
"-shh milificent!"
"BUT XO! WE'RE SUPPOSED TO TAKE BACK THE PLACE BEFORE DAWN! OTHERWISE WE'LL-
"hehehhehe. SOON, I shall have the whole WORLD at my beckoning!!"
"-be QUIET mister bobo!" snaps the voice of Christi, the vampire girl.
Courage raises an eyebrow and tiptoes in the direction of the conversation-
"Huh? Who ARE all these people?*turns round the corner in caution, then his jaw falls to the floor* EEEEH!!! OH NOOO.."
Gathered round are an even larger group of freaks! Steel and Genisis are on one side along with a red-headed very angry looking new girl. There is nothing unusual about her, save the enormous tail and the tiny batlike rainbow colored dragon wings.. On the other side of the room is the green haired wicca-vampire named Christi from before, fidgeting nervously with the pipes, a panda doll with big spooky eyes, a girl with messy black and purple hair and a tshirt that says 'Yuri' on it rolling up a comicbook, and a black adolescent girl with bright pink eyes, pink wings pink lips and pink hair, and a hot pink pair of jeans and a tshirt on, plus many more oddities who are all female. There are halfmelted candles of assorted shapes and colors and sizes littered around the room and incense heavily perfumes the air. Their all focusing on Xo who is STILL wearing towels and is sitting crosslegged on a crate dripping wet, twitching her antenae-
Courage gapes. "O_____O..eek!"
The redhead growls menacingly. "CURSE those NEWBYS..Xo! I thought you killed them all!!!"
Milificent, the purple haired comic girl nods fervently. "We need to get this clubhouse back as soon as possible! What's taking so long! They should be out by now! This is OUR clubhouse, not theirs!!"
"YEAH THATS RIGHT!" snaps Christi. "WE built this clubhouse, WE managed this clubhouse, and WE will RETREIVE this clubhouse if its the last thing we do!"
There is much cheering and hooting after this speech,apparently Christi's the ringleader and Xo and Mil are the understudys.
Courage is puzzled. " A clubhouse? ~_' Our farm is their..CLUBHOUSE!? oog!! I don't like the sounds of this..or my name is Foofoo!-and thank HEAVENS it's NOT!"
"SO WHAT'RE WE WAITING FOR!!"roars the redhead dragongirl. "LETS KILL THEM ALL RIGHT NOW!"
Courage squeals.
"Sit down Lucy!" snaps Roseopal, the girl draped in pink. "We can't just go on an all out massacre. It'll be too conspicous, who KNOWS how many newbys have inherited it, since we left. We can't just go round slaughtering unumbered people."
"Conspicous!? WHO CARES? Look, the newbys are gathering, AS WE SPEAK! WE MUST BE RID OF THEM IMMIEDIATLY!"
"hey we were ALL Newbys once Lucy.." interupts Christi.
Lucy silences Christi with a horrible growl. Christi sneers.
"Oh so its a FIGHT you want eh?" she smirks, baring her vampire fangs. Lucy hisses, and bares her dragon teeth, ready for battle. Xo suddenly makes her first speech.
"Comrades! COMRADES! Steel, break them up-.."
Steel takes Christi's hand uneasily and leads her away from the fight, while Milificent takes Lucy who reluctantly sits down, and glares at Christi.
"Comrades.."mutters Xo in a steady, moody voice. "The newbys are of no threat to us. There are only three- a farmer, his grossly obese dwarf of a wife, and a cute pink doggy..wholikestospyonnakedpeople..He looks more like a JACKEL than a dog.I HAve seeeeen hiimmm..:P"
They all gasp.
"BURN THEMMMM BURNTHEMBURNTHEMBURNTHEEEM Aaaaallll!!" shrieks Mister Bobo, the panda doll.
"SILENCE!" booms Xo, twitching another antenae. Although Christi may be the most popular of the group, Xo seems to be by far the most manipulative, even when she doesn't seem to intend it, when she speaks, everybody listens- except lucy who is giving Christi and Xo death stares.
Courage crawls a teensy bit farther into the room, behind the girls nervously. "What the heck is going ON here?" he whispers to himself.
"As we speak, my multi-talented hired lackey Agent CHELSEA is bringing the newbys to their DOOM!"
"oooooo.." ooh's the audience.
"ULTIMATE DESTRUCTION!" crows Xo.
"Aaaaah.." Ah's the crowd.
"TERRIBLE FATE!"
"ohhhh-
"HIDEOUS-
"JUST GED ON WITH IT MATE!" calls out Genisis.
"Chelsea will be doing in the newbys soon enough. So there is absolutly no reason for this nonsense! Comrades, this is a time for CELEBRATION! In a few more minutes, the clubhouse will be OURS AGAIN!
THEN...Ohhh THEN-.."
The crowd leans foward anxiously, and Xo grins wickedly.
"THE FUN WILL BEGIN ONCE MOOOORE!!! WAHAHAHHAHA!!!*throws up her arms into the air and cackles like a mad-scientist, and lightning flashes*
The crowd stares blankly.
Xo pouts and twitches her antenae.
"Well???"
"......"
"CHEER YOU FOOLS!"
"....*tiny voice breaks out in the back row* Wheee!!.."
"AHEMN. You call that CHEERING?..CMON! OR ARE Y'ALL JUST CHICKEN?"
"YAAAAAAAAAY! WHOOOOO! WAHAHAHAHA! YIPPEEEE HOORAY! hehehehheee!"
Milificent shrieks and throws Xo up into the air-
"Xo rocketh, yes she do!"
"Aw g'wan!D"
Christi and Mil and all teh others pick up Xo and throw her into the air-
O.O AIEEE!
Lucy laughs hysterically in the background as she hits teh floor with a THUD! and they all start dancing and stomping all over the floor-
"OW!OFF!HEY-MY BODYYY-OWCH!ACK!MY FACE! MY BONES!AAAAAH.."
Out of the ceiling comes a disco ball, and color-changing lights flicker on and off, and very fast techno music plays. The girls dance VERY badly, and Xo is clinging to the disco ball for dear life, bruised and battered and covered in footprints out of range of the dancers..
2 girls named Sam and Saskia with crazy brown and blue hair and wearing rather slutty catsuits and enormous boots pass round cheese and crackers on platters. Courage's eyes widen in horror. "I CAN'T LET THEM DO THIS!! I'VE GOT TO SAVE MUREIL FROM THESE FREAKS!" Courage quickly turns round and tries to run away but, in doing so, trips, and knocks over a table of refreshments-
A punchbowl falls on him with a clatter and a splash! He lifts it up and gives a dazed goofy grin. "Heeheee HA HA HA HA HEEE..:D"
Everyone suddenly gapes in his direction and steel points-
"EEEEEEK!"
Christi frowns. "Doggone it, theres a dog in our punch! YOU'VE RUINED OUR BEVERAGES FOR THE LAST TIME NEWBY-DOG!" P
The freaks-club lunges toward Courage who runs between everyone's legs. "AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!" They try to grab him but are unable to catch the puny pink canine-
They all rush down excitedly up the stairs squealing like a bunch of airheaded slumber party girls-
Steel: AWWW WHATTA CUTE DOGGY!
Christi:LETS EAT HIM! He looks like a poodle!!! :d
Lucy(redheaded dragon girl):GRRR I HATE NEWBYS!
Milificent(the yuri comic girl): NOOO BE NICE! HE'S SO CUTE! I WANNA PET HIM! Sorcerie/Tzat foreva!
Genisis:EH MATE! WE AINT'S GONNA EAT YA! WE JEST WANNA PLAY WID YEH'S!
Mr. Bobo: Mooooo-wAHAHHAHAAaaaHAHAHHAHaaaaaa!! FEAR ME AND MY FRIGHTSOME...-NESS!
Xo*holding onto her towels as she runs*: Its awfully hard to run in these things, could SOMEBODY PLEEEZ donate some stinkin pants!? Mister Bobo YA MIND RUNNING A BIT FASTER!@@*kicks stuffed panda out of her way*
Mister Bobo the evil panda doll goes flying into the living room where Eustace is still unsucessfully trying to fix the tv. Mureil is reading a book-
Mister bobo: MOOWAHAHAHA!!!
*attacks Mureil's face*
Mureil:AAAAAAACK!
Eusteace: MUREIL SHADDAP I'M TRYIN TO FIX THE DARN TV SET!
Mureil shrieks and rips Mister Bobo off. He gets stuck to Eustace's face-
"loook into myyyyy eyeeeeezz..."he croons.
"AUGH! STOOPID PANDA THINGY!!! GEDDOFF!"
He tugs at the plush panda that holds firmly to his face, and continues to ignore its sadistic commands-
"BURN THE HOUSE DOWN BURN THE WHOLE HOUSE DowwnnnNUH!SMASH THE SHIP! SMASH THE SHIP! SMASH THE SHIP-
"ARGHH! STOOPID BEAR! STOOPID ANNOYING FREAKY FREAK FREAKY BEAR!!! NNGG!"
Eustace no matter how hard he tries, cannot get Bobo off his face, and slowly but surely his resistance is weakening. Mureil is screaming in the background-
"COOOOOURAGE! HEEEEELP!"
Courage is to busy running away from the rest of the freaks who are having a major ball chasing the poor dog around the rest of the house.
Suddenly another bear comes into the living room, but this one is VERY different from Mister Bobo. For one thing, it is a brown teddy bear, and although his narrowed angry eyes arent nearly as scary as Bobo's hypnotic ones, his fanged smirk and knife-bladed claws are ten times more horrible. His entire body is covered with horrible stitches-or are they scars?- and nasty looking pins stick out from all over him. Most eerie of all is the fact he is glowing with dark fire..
"Let the old man go, you fool.." hisses the new bear sinisterly.
"WHO ARE YOU TO GIVE ME ORDERS!!" cackles the maniac panda still clutching Eustace's bald head.
"I am the center of the almighty evil force of Voodoo. I am Voodoo teddy. I ask you again to remove the old man. He is for me to settle. My mistress told me to do him in. So please let his face go. Or I will be forced to do something...*grins terrifyingly, cue Ramses theme*.....NoT aT AlL PlEaSeNT."
"KNEELBEFOREYOURMASTER,BOBO, YOUUNGRATEFUL-
Voodoo Teddy bear sticks out one claw-
*SLASH!!!!!*
Eustace sits in the middle of the living room rubbing his eyes.
"Ugghnn...whereamI? Huh? HEY! WHo are yoU!??"
Voodoo Teddy is standing in a large pile of stuffing, and two glass eyes that still continue to gaze hypnoticaly at the ceiling.
"YoUR WoRsT NiGhTmAre." )
"AAAAAAAACK!"wails Mureil.
"MUREIL! How many times have I told you to quit buyin' every durn thing ya see on the Home Shopping channel!!?"snaps Eustace.
"This is gonna hurt-" hisses Voodoo Teddy as he nears in on Eustace.
* * *
Xo at the end of the large parade chasing after Courage takes a breather, and gasps for air as she is falling behind everyone else.
"PANT PANT PANT..MAN! I REALLY NEED SOME CLOTHES.."she chokes, wheezing and holding onto a doorknob for support-
Suddenly the door bursts open, slamming Xo behind it. In march five figures, large fairys! The riff-raff!
"ALRIGHT XO! YER COMIN WITH US BACK TO THE FAY! THE PHAIRY-QUIENE DEMANDS YOUR ARREST! IN THE NAME OF DA LAW! PUT YER HANDS UP AND YOUR WINGS DOWN IMMEADIETLY, OR WE WILL BE FORCED TO USE VIOLANCE ON A KID'S SHOW! SO SHOW YOURSELF, YOU VILE FIEND OF A CROOK!"
"NGGG..oogy boogy booh..uggh."
"BEHIND THE DOOR!" crows the leader with the shiny badge on her hat. She is bright blue, with gold wings, and adorable anime green eyes. Despite the fairy's cuteness though, her voice has an unpleasent bark to it.
One of her rookies closes the door, Xo plastered on the side of the wall with x'ed out eyes..
"...woah. *the leader looks away* Give her this-" *hands her hat to the rookie who gives it to Xo.*
Xo shakes herself awake, grins goofily and blushes profusly and covers her naked body with the enormous witches hat that the leader lent her.
"S-sorryabout that..:S Er..what's all this about?"
"WE'RE TAKING YOU AND THIS SICK LITTLE CULT OF YOURS TO JAIL!" shrieks the little fairy-girl, wings flapping rudely.
"Sheesh. WHY!?"
"*Ahem*"coughs a rookie nudging Xo in the ribs.
"Oh..*looks up at the ceiling*..oopsy. I forgot about that. That..oh cmon you cant STILL want me arrested after doing that, that was SOO long ago I-
The leader shakes her head, golden curls bouncing from side to side. "Sorry chum. Yer comin' with us. Your under arrest for burglary, homicide, genocide, attempts at suicide, pesticide-
"PESTticide!?"
"It says here that you've made the entire race of the japanese polka-dotted magenta legged mosquito species completely extinct.."snorts the leader.
"WHAT!? I've never even HEARD of such a thing-"remarks a rookie.
"Thats because SHE-*points at blushing Xo* wiped them all out!"
"I only killed ONE!!"squeaks Xo.
"Maybe because that was the only one in EXISTENCE!??" snaps the fairy. "Also, you've commited dog-napping, kid napping of BOTH children and small goats, stealing, bank robbery, shop lifting, association with Dead Kitty and the Goth Girl aka Agent CHELSEA, as well as vampires, hentai-pervs, homicidal maniacs, alien invaders, terrorists, animanaguses, false-prophets, druglords, store-clerks, dictators, homeless people, evil sultans, wicked wizards, lion tamers, anarchists, communists, capitalists, and Canadian Prime Ministers, you've stolen GOD knows what from organ donars, and finally-
"I DID MY TIME FOR...IT...ALREADY!!"
"Oh NO you didn't! It says here you ALSO escaped from jail, instead of serving your sentence for 15 minutes in the time out room!"
"Shoot. Well. I HAVE been a bad girl haven't I?" *blushes* "Um..well. Couldja at least let the rest of them stay and take over the clubhouse?"
"Xo your secret hideout has already been located and has been turned into a very nice bookstore." replies the fairy. "As for this place, well it only adds to your list of crimes. BEING..THAT THIS IS NOT YOUR ANCIENT HIDEOUT."
"...its not?"
"No." smirks the leader. A tiny grin forms on her plump pink lips and her smooth black eyebrows narrow devilishly. "Just a farm."
"...but but but.."
"Oh and uh, here, I've got a present for ya-*she takes out a pair of handcuffs* They're sure to look just lovely with the rest of your uniform."
"NO! UNIFORM BAD!! I AM NOT A BRIT! I AM NOT A BRIT! HEY! HEY!! LEAVE US KIDS ALONE! MUST! ESCAPE! FLEEE!" shrieks Xo. She vanishes suddenly in a puff of grey smoke!
"coff coff coff!" hacks the riff-raff. "SHE'S VANISHED!!"
"Uh oh.." groans the leader. On her wrist is one of the handcuffs meant for Xo. The other one is attached to the stair banister.
Shrieking in a veruca salt fashion, she demands them to pursuit Xo and her followers and take them all under arrest immeadietly! "AND DO IT NOWWWW!!"
The other fairys flutter off in a big hurry.
* * *
Courage wails as he and the parade runs round the dinner table for like the 6th time. They wind up turning into a conga line, and stampede into the livingroom right ontop of Voodoo teddy who is about to make his move, smooshing him into nothing but fluff and pins! A dark wisp of smoke drifts unoticed out the window..
"HEY! WHO'RE YOU!?" snaps Eustace.
"AIEEEEEE! COURAAAAAGE! HELP ME!" screams Mureil.
"AAAAAAH!!" screams Courage. The conga line turns into a vicious choochoo train and are pushing Courage, whose ontop of Mureil, whose ontop of Eustace reluctantly across the floor-
"GET OUT YOU NEWBYS!" crows Christi.
"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!" screams Courage.
"WE'VE GOT YOU NOW, FUZZBALL, AHAHA! NIPPY NIPPY NIP NIP!" cackles Milificent.
"OOOOOOOOOOH!!" moans Eustace.
"TAKE THIS!" roars Lucy.
"AhhhhhHHHHH!" cries Mureil-
*insert a locomotive sound effective*
They rush faster and faster and are inside the kitchen-
"LETS EAT THE FAT ONE!" laughs Roseopal.
"AAAAAHHHH!" wails Mureil covering her face.
Courage's eyes boggle out and realizes what they're going to do! "They're going to COOK us!AAAAA!"
Sure enough, the train is carrying Eustace, Mureil and Courage, towards the open mouth of the stove! Flames lick the inside of it, and Courage screams and covers his eyes-
Suddenly!
"HYAAAAAAAH!"
The riff raff fairys to the rescue!
"STOP RIGHT DER IN DA NAME OF DA LAW!!" shouts a rookie, pointing at the train of freaks.
The other fairy rookies slide down from ropes in the ceiling, and perform fancy ninja kicks and stunts-
"NI BIDDY WAH! POP! CHIM CHIM CHIM CHIM CHA ROOOOO! HIIIII YIIIII! ROOOOO!"
The line comes to a direct halt. Courage sighs. "WHAT TOOK them so long!??"
"GED OUT OF MY DURN KITCHEN!" yells Eustace.
"OH NO! ITS THE RIFF RAFF!" gasps Christi. "RUN AWAYYYY!"
"EEEEEK! RUNAWAAAY!" yells Steel.
"RUN AWAYY RUn awaaay run awayyy.." cry the rest of the freaks, retreating from the kitchen. They drop Mureil and Courage and Eustace on the floor and leave the room in a big delighted panic.
"Liongurl! WHAT'RE WE GOING TO DO!?"pants Christi, running out of the kitchen.
"Well..pant pant..I say we PANT! find Xo and pant pant pant.."
"oh what the heck, LETS GET OUT OF HERE!!"cries Milificent.
The ninja fairys fly after them, and manage to restrain a few freaks- they capture Venus Dark Angel, Fallen Angel, Roseopal Angel, Moon Angel, and Cherry.
The freaks all run screaming their defeat-cries of 'runaway!' and crash through the side of the house, making trails across the landscape of Nowhere, and dissapear into the distance..
* * * *
Dawn rises on Nowhere.
*cue creaky rocking chair music*
The calender says 'Saterday 14' on it. Courage sighs contentedly in Mureil's lap, and she sips her chammomile tea.
"Happily, all has ended well." she says to Courage.
"Blah blah blah." grunts Eustace. "MUREIL! MAKE ME BREKFAST! Where's my Bran? Darn Tv set STILL ain't fixed.."
Courage sighs. "It seems like things are starting to get back to normal afterall.."smiles Mureil.
There is a knock on the door.
"WHo could that be?" Courage asks out loud.
"I wonder who it is.." says Mureil.
"Go answer the stinkin door you stupid dog!"
Courage sighs and answers the door-
*cue ramses theme*
Xo and Agent CHELSEA are there, Xo towering on the left in a black duster with big black buttons on, and large drooping sleeves, black gloves, jeans and curly black elf-shoes, and is holding a briefcase. Chelsea has Dead Kitty wrapped round her neck like a frock, and is still wearing her trench coat and is holding a toolbox which drips blood on the porch.
"Excuse me sir-" says Chelsea in a most twisted voice, with a homicidal glare; "-but did you call for an electrician???" finishes Xo. )
Agent CHELSEA, casts an annoyed sidelong glance at Xo. Xo's left antennae twitches with a sickening noise, like a broken wire and grins wickedly at Courage..
*Cue Ramses theme*
O__________O......
Mureil calls in from the living room-
"Is that the electrician Courage?"^_^
"O________________O..................AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
:D HOOO- DOW! :D
"RRRGH I can't WAIT till the newbys are all out of the house..CHELSEA! I THOUGHT YOU GOT RID OF THEM ALREADY!"
*cue ramses theme, Chelsea the trench coat girl is standing under the bathroom window and lightning flashes.
"Xo, why are you naked?"
"I was takin' a shower fer pete's sake, just cos I am not human doesn't mean I haven't any hygeine."
"Your grossing Dead Kitty out with your nudeyness.."
"WILL YOU FORGET THE NUDITY CRAP!"shouts Xo. "JUST GET RID OF THE NEWBYS! You know why i brought you here. SERVE YOUR PURPOSE!"
"Sorry. I don't do in ANYONE until I get the green."
"WHAAAAAT!?"
"No cash, no kill."
"RRRRRG! I AM SAVING THAT MONEY FOR A LENORE COMIC YOU BIG FAT STINKY LOOZER POOZER STOOPY!"
"Stoopy? _O"
"Er..YEAH!"
"Xo, pay me now-
*takes out butcher knife, cue ramses theme again*O.O!!!
-or suffer the consequences."snarls Chelsea.
".SIIIIIIGH. How much do ya want?"
* * *
Courage is racing down the hallway trying to get to the attic stairs- "PANT PANT PANT-AAAAAAA!"
The same smoky lady(ghost actually) from before is sitting on the stairs reading a fashion magazine. She is very pretty( she was a model actually.)and frowns angrilly at him. "I THOUGHT WE GOT RID OF ALL YOU BLASTED NEWBYS!*snarls*"
"AAAAAAH!*screams and runs through the ghost's transparent body leaving a dog-hole through her bosom and races up the stairs*
":s...HEY! GET BACK HERE! YOU LIDDLE-
Courage screams all the way up the stairs and slams the door and pants hard. Her voice comes from behind the door-
"HEY! YOU OPEN THIS DOOR RIGHT NOW YOU STUPID ANIMAL!"
"AIEEE! WHATDOIDO!WHATDOIDO!?"
Grey lady continues to pound on the door with her fists-
"YOU BETTER LET ME IN! I'M A GHOST!! UHM..YEAH! SO LET ME IN YOU STUPID DOG!"
"AAAAAAA!....*Grey lady continues to bang on the door, and doesn't walk through. Courage raises an eyebrow.* "huh? ~_'"
Grey lady continues to bang on the door and rant and rave at Courage. He stares oddly for a moment and then shrugs at the audience.
He rushes off to the computer in the corner of the room and begins to type furiously.
"Freaks..attacking..the farm! So very many..FREAKS! WHATDOIDO! *ENTER*"
"Freaks after your farm?" drawls the computer with so much sarcasm its frightening. "How unusual."
"BABABAA, ITS SO MANY!!! ALL AT ONCE! ITS LIKE A CLUB OR SOMETHING! HELP! *ENTER*"
"So sorry. You're going to have to be more specific."
"...sheesh. Some advanced technology! *grumbles and types faster* VAMPIRES WITH GREEN HAIR AND TINY TSHIRTS, LITTLE GIRLS WITH DEAD CATS AND KNIVES IN TRENCH COATS, GHOSTS WITH LARGE...THINGS, NAKED PIXIE-DEMONS IN THE SHOWER SINGING RAINSONGS-OOOOOooogg!!! DOSOMETHING!! *ENTER!*"
"Lemme GUESS. Smoking parsely again old boy?" it types back. "That is SOOO out.."it drawls.
"Oh thanks a LOT.." .P"
"WHY YOU!!!"
"AAAAAAA!" Courage screams and rushes downstairs. He is halfway down the stairs when suddenly he comes screeching to a halt to take a few breaths-"pant pant pant..where was I? Oh yeah-AAAAAAaaaaaaa!"
He finsishes his screaming then runs down to the left of the corridor, while Grey lady flies off to the right-
"NOW WHERE'D THAT STUPID NEWBY GET TOO!?"
Courage pants hard and rushes down to the cellar and slams the door.
"PHEWWW! pant pant pant.." he sits down in the dark to rest when suddenly he hears some faint voices.
"-whaddya mean the newbys are STILL ALIVE?"
"-shh milificent!"
"BUT XO! WE'RE SUPPOSED TO TAKE BACK THE PLACE BEFORE DAWN! OTHERWISE WE'LL-
"hehehhehe. SOON, I shall have the whole WORLD at my beckoning!!"
"-be QUIET mister bobo!" snaps the voice of Christi, the vampire girl.
Courage raises an eyebrow and tiptoes in the direction of the conversation-
"Huh? Who ARE all these people?*turns round the corner in caution, then his jaw falls to the floor* EEEEH!!! OH NOOO.."
Gathered round are an even larger group of freaks! Steel and Genisis are on one side along with a red-headed very angry looking new girl. There is nothing unusual about her, save the enormous tail and the tiny batlike rainbow colored dragon wings.. On the other side of the room is the green haired wicca-vampire named Christi from before, fidgeting nervously with the pipes, a panda doll with big spooky eyes, a girl with messy black and purple hair and a tshirt that says 'Yuri' on it rolling up a comicbook, and a black adolescent girl with bright pink eyes, pink wings pink lips and pink hair, and a hot pink pair of jeans and a tshirt on, plus many more oddities who are all female. There are halfmelted candles of assorted shapes and colors and sizes littered around the room and incense heavily perfumes the air. Their all focusing on Xo who is STILL wearing towels and is sitting crosslegged on a crate dripping wet, twitching her antenae-
Courage gapes. "O_____O..eek!"
The redhead growls menacingly. "CURSE those NEWBYS..Xo! I thought you killed them all!!!"
Milificent, the purple haired comic girl nods fervently. "We need to get this clubhouse back as soon as possible! What's taking so long! They should be out by now! This is OUR clubhouse, not theirs!!"
"YEAH THATS RIGHT!" snaps Christi. "WE built this clubhouse, WE managed this clubhouse, and WE will RETREIVE this clubhouse if its the last thing we do!"
There is much cheering and hooting after this speech,apparently Christi's the ringleader and Xo and Mil are the understudys.
Courage is puzzled. " A clubhouse? ~_' Our farm is their..CLUBHOUSE!? oog!! I don't like the sounds of this..or my name is Foofoo!-and thank HEAVENS it's NOT!"
"SO WHAT'RE WE WAITING FOR!!"roars the redhead dragongirl. "LETS KILL THEM ALL RIGHT NOW!"
Courage squeals.
"Sit down Lucy!" snaps Roseopal, the girl draped in pink. "We can't just go on an all out massacre. It'll be too conspicous, who KNOWS how many newbys have inherited it, since we left. We can't just go round slaughtering unumbered people."
"Conspicous!? WHO CARES? Look, the newbys are gathering, AS WE SPEAK! WE MUST BE RID OF THEM IMMIEDIATLY!"
"hey we were ALL Newbys once Lucy.." interupts Christi.
Lucy silences Christi with a horrible growl. Christi sneers.
"Oh so its a FIGHT you want eh?" she smirks, baring her vampire fangs. Lucy hisses, and bares her dragon teeth, ready for battle. Xo suddenly makes her first speech.
"Comrades! COMRADES! Steel, break them up-.."
Steel takes Christi's hand uneasily and leads her away from the fight, while Milificent takes Lucy who reluctantly sits down, and glares at Christi.
"Comrades.."mutters Xo in a steady, moody voice. "The newbys are of no threat to us. There are only three- a farmer, his grossly obese dwarf of a wife, and a cute pink doggy..wholikestospyonnakedpeople..He looks more like a JACKEL than a dog.I HAve seeeeen hiimmm..:P"
They all gasp.
"BURN THEMMMM BURNTHEMBURNTHEMBURNTHEEEM Aaaaallll!!" shrieks Mister Bobo, the panda doll.
"SILENCE!" booms Xo, twitching another antenae. Although Christi may be the most popular of the group, Xo seems to be by far the most manipulative, even when she doesn't seem to intend it, when she speaks, everybody listens- except lucy who is giving Christi and Xo death stares.
Courage crawls a teensy bit farther into the room, behind the girls nervously. "What the heck is going ON here?" he whispers to himself.
"As we speak, my multi-talented hired lackey Agent CHELSEA is bringing the newbys to their DOOM!"
"oooooo.." ooh's the audience.
"ULTIMATE DESTRUCTION!" crows Xo.
"Aaaaah.." Ah's the crowd.
"TERRIBLE FATE!"
"ohhhh-
"HIDEOUS-
"JUST GED ON WITH IT MATE!" calls out Genisis.
"Chelsea will be doing in the newbys soon enough. So there is absolutly no reason for this nonsense! Comrades, this is a time for CELEBRATION! In a few more minutes, the clubhouse will be OURS AGAIN!
THEN...Ohhh THEN-.."
The crowd leans foward anxiously, and Xo grins wickedly.
"THE FUN WILL BEGIN ONCE MOOOORE!!! WAHAHAHHAHA!!!*throws up her arms into the air and cackles like a mad-scientist, and lightning flashes*
The crowd stares blankly.
Xo pouts and twitches her antenae.
"Well???"
"......"
"CHEER YOU FOOLS!"
"....*tiny voice breaks out in the back row* Wheee!!.."
"AHEMN. You call that CHEERING?..CMON! OR ARE Y'ALL JUST CHICKEN?"
"YAAAAAAAAAY! WHOOOOO! WAHAHAHAHA! YIPPEEEE HOORAY! hehehehheee!"
Milificent shrieks and throws Xo up into the air-
"Xo rocketh, yes she do!"
"Aw g'wan!D"
Christi and Mil and all teh others pick up Xo and throw her into the air-
O.O AIEEE!
Lucy laughs hysterically in the background as she hits teh floor with a THUD! and they all start dancing and stomping all over the floor-
"OW!OFF!HEY-MY BODYYY-OWCH!ACK!MY FACE! MY BONES!AAAAAH.."
Out of the ceiling comes a disco ball, and color-changing lights flicker on and off, and very fast techno music plays. The girls dance VERY badly, and Xo is clinging to the disco ball for dear life, bruised and battered and covered in footprints out of range of the dancers..
2 girls named Sam and Saskia with crazy brown and blue hair and wearing rather slutty catsuits and enormous boots pass round cheese and crackers on platters. Courage's eyes widen in horror. "I CAN'T LET THEM DO THIS!! I'VE GOT TO SAVE MUREIL FROM THESE FREAKS!" Courage quickly turns round and tries to run away but, in doing so, trips, and knocks over a table of refreshments-
A punchbowl falls on him with a clatter and a splash! He lifts it up and gives a dazed goofy grin. "Heeheee HA HA HA HA HEEE..:D"
Everyone suddenly gapes in his direction and steel points-
"EEEEEEK!"
Christi frowns. "Doggone it, theres a dog in our punch! YOU'VE RUINED OUR BEVERAGES FOR THE LAST TIME NEWBY-DOG!" P
The freaks-club lunges toward Courage who runs between everyone's legs. "AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!" They try to grab him but are unable to catch the puny pink canine-
They all rush down excitedly up the stairs squealing like a bunch of airheaded slumber party girls-
Steel: AWWW WHATTA CUTE DOGGY!
Christi:LETS EAT HIM! He looks like a poodle!!! :d
Lucy(redheaded dragon girl):GRRR I HATE NEWBYS!
Milificent(the yuri comic girl): NOOO BE NICE! HE'S SO CUTE! I WANNA PET HIM! Sorcerie/Tzat foreva!
Genisis:EH MATE! WE AINT'S GONNA EAT YA! WE JEST WANNA PLAY WID YEH'S!
Mr. Bobo: Mooooo-wAHAHHAHAAaaaHAHAHHAHaaaaaa!! FEAR ME AND MY FRIGHTSOME...-NESS!
Xo*holding onto her towels as she runs*: Its awfully hard to run in these things, could SOMEBODY PLEEEZ donate some stinkin pants!? Mister Bobo YA MIND RUNNING A BIT FASTER!@@*kicks stuffed panda out of her way*
Mister Bobo the evil panda doll goes flying into the living room where Eustace is still unsucessfully trying to fix the tv. Mureil is reading a book-
Mister bobo: MOOWAHAHAHA!!!
*attacks Mureil's face*
Mureil:AAAAAAACK!
Eusteace: MUREIL SHADDAP I'M TRYIN TO FIX THE DARN TV SET!
Mureil shrieks and rips Mister Bobo off. He gets stuck to Eustace's face-
"loook into myyyyy eyeeeeezz..."he croons.
"AUGH! STOOPID PANDA THINGY!!! GEDDOFF!"
He tugs at the plush panda that holds firmly to his face, and continues to ignore its sadistic commands-
"BURN THE HOUSE DOWN BURN THE WHOLE HOUSE DowwnnnNUH!SMASH THE SHIP! SMASH THE SHIP! SMASH THE SHIP-
"ARGHH! STOOPID BEAR! STOOPID ANNOYING FREAKY FREAK FREAKY BEAR!!! NNGG!"
Eustace no matter how hard he tries, cannot get Bobo off his face, and slowly but surely his resistance is weakening. Mureil is screaming in the background-
"COOOOOURAGE! HEEEEELP!"
Courage is to busy running away from the rest of the freaks who are having a major ball chasing the poor dog around the rest of the house.
Suddenly another bear comes into the living room, but this one is VERY different from Mister Bobo. For one thing, it is a brown teddy bear, and although his narrowed angry eyes arent nearly as scary as Bobo's hypnotic ones, his fanged smirk and knife-bladed claws are ten times more horrible. His entire body is covered with horrible stitches-or are they scars?- and nasty looking pins stick out from all over him. Most eerie of all is the fact he is glowing with dark fire..
"Let the old man go, you fool.." hisses the new bear sinisterly.
"WHO ARE YOU TO GIVE ME ORDERS!!" cackles the maniac panda still clutching Eustace's bald head.
"I am the center of the almighty evil force of Voodoo. I am Voodoo teddy. I ask you again to remove the old man. He is for me to settle. My mistress told me to do him in. So please let his face go. Or I will be forced to do something...*grins terrifyingly, cue Ramses theme*.....NoT aT AlL PlEaSeNT."
"KNEELBEFOREYOURMASTER,BOBO, YOUUNGRATEFUL-
Voodoo Teddy bear sticks out one claw-
*SLASH!!!!!*
Eustace sits in the middle of the living room rubbing his eyes.
"Ugghnn...whereamI? Huh? HEY! WHo are yoU!??"
Voodoo Teddy is standing in a large pile of stuffing, and two glass eyes that still continue to gaze hypnoticaly at the ceiling.
"YoUR WoRsT NiGhTmAre." )
"AAAAAAAACK!"wails Mureil.
"MUREIL! How many times have I told you to quit buyin' every durn thing ya see on the Home Shopping channel!!?"snaps Eustace.
"This is gonna hurt-" hisses Voodoo Teddy as he nears in on Eustace.
* * *
Xo at the end of the large parade chasing after Courage takes a breather, and gasps for air as she is falling behind everyone else.
"PANT PANT PANT..MAN! I REALLY NEED SOME CLOTHES.."she chokes, wheezing and holding onto a doorknob for support-
Suddenly the door bursts open, slamming Xo behind it. In march five figures, large fairys! The riff-raff!
"ALRIGHT XO! YER COMIN WITH US BACK TO THE FAY! THE PHAIRY-QUIENE DEMANDS YOUR ARREST! IN THE NAME OF DA LAW! PUT YER HANDS UP AND YOUR WINGS DOWN IMMEADIETLY, OR WE WILL BE FORCED TO USE VIOLANCE ON A KID'S SHOW! SO SHOW YOURSELF, YOU VILE FIEND OF A CROOK!"
"NGGG..oogy boogy booh..uggh."
"BEHIND THE DOOR!" crows the leader with the shiny badge on her hat. She is bright blue, with gold wings, and adorable anime green eyes. Despite the fairy's cuteness though, her voice has an unpleasent bark to it.
One of her rookies closes the door, Xo plastered on the side of the wall with x'ed out eyes..
"...woah. *the leader looks away* Give her this-" *hands her hat to the rookie who gives it to Xo.*
Xo shakes herself awake, grins goofily and blushes profusly and covers her naked body with the enormous witches hat that the leader lent her.
"S-sorryabout that..:S Er..what's all this about?"
"WE'RE TAKING YOU AND THIS SICK LITTLE CULT OF YOURS TO JAIL!" shrieks the little fairy-girl, wings flapping rudely.
"Sheesh. WHY!?"
"*Ahem*"coughs a rookie nudging Xo in the ribs.
"Oh..*looks up at the ceiling*..oopsy. I forgot about that. That..oh cmon you cant STILL want me arrested after doing that, that was SOO long ago I-
The leader shakes her head, golden curls bouncing from side to side. "Sorry chum. Yer comin' with us. Your under arrest for burglary, homicide, genocide, attempts at suicide, pesticide-
"PESTticide!?"
"It says here that you've made the entire race of the japanese polka-dotted magenta legged mosquito species completely extinct.."snorts the leader.
"WHAT!? I've never even HEARD of such a thing-"remarks a rookie.
"Thats because SHE-*points at blushing Xo* wiped them all out!"
"I only killed ONE!!"squeaks Xo.
"Maybe because that was the only one in EXISTENCE!??" snaps the fairy. "Also, you've commited dog-napping, kid napping of BOTH children and small goats, stealing, bank robbery, shop lifting, association with Dead Kitty and the Goth Girl aka Agent CHELSEA, as well as vampires, hentai-pervs, homicidal maniacs, alien invaders, terrorists, animanaguses, false-prophets, druglords, store-clerks, dictators, homeless people, evil sultans, wicked wizards, lion tamers, anarchists, communists, capitalists, and Canadian Prime Ministers, you've stolen GOD knows what from organ donars, and finally-
"I DID MY TIME FOR...IT...ALREADY!!"
"Oh NO you didn't! It says here you ALSO escaped from jail, instead of serving your sentence for 15 minutes in the time out room!"
"Shoot. Well. I HAVE been a bad girl haven't I?" *blushes* "Um..well. Couldja at least let the rest of them stay and take over the clubhouse?"
"Xo your secret hideout has already been located and has been turned into a very nice bookstore." replies the fairy. "As for this place, well it only adds to your list of crimes. BEING..THAT THIS IS NOT YOUR ANCIENT HIDEOUT."
"...its not?"
"No." smirks the leader. A tiny grin forms on her plump pink lips and her smooth black eyebrows narrow devilishly. "Just a farm."
"...but but but.."
"Oh and uh, here, I've got a present for ya-*she takes out a pair of handcuffs* They're sure to look just lovely with the rest of your uniform."
"NO! UNIFORM BAD!! I AM NOT A BRIT! I AM NOT A BRIT! HEY! HEY!! LEAVE US KIDS ALONE! MUST! ESCAPE! FLEEE!" shrieks Xo. She vanishes suddenly in a puff of grey smoke!
"coff coff coff!" hacks the riff-raff. "SHE'S VANISHED!!"
"Uh oh.." groans the leader. On her wrist is one of the handcuffs meant for Xo. The other one is attached to the stair banister.
Shrieking in a veruca salt fashion, she demands them to pursuit Xo and her followers and take them all under arrest immeadietly! "AND DO IT NOWWWW!!"
The other fairys flutter off in a big hurry.
* * *
Courage wails as he and the parade runs round the dinner table for like the 6th time. They wind up turning into a conga line, and stampede into the livingroom right ontop of Voodoo teddy who is about to make his move, smooshing him into nothing but fluff and pins! A dark wisp of smoke drifts unoticed out the window..
"HEY! WHO'RE YOU!?" snaps Eustace.
"AIEEEEEE! COURAAAAAGE! HELP ME!" screams Mureil.
"AAAAAAH!!" screams Courage. The conga line turns into a vicious choochoo train and are pushing Courage, whose ontop of Mureil, whose ontop of Eustace reluctantly across the floor-
"GET OUT YOU NEWBYS!" crows Christi.
"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!" screams Courage.
"WE'VE GOT YOU NOW, FUZZBALL, AHAHA! NIPPY NIPPY NIP NIP!" cackles Milificent.
"OOOOOOOOOOH!!" moans Eustace.
"TAKE THIS!" roars Lucy.
"AhhhhhHHHHH!" cries Mureil-
*insert a locomotive sound effective*
They rush faster and faster and are inside the kitchen-
"LETS EAT THE FAT ONE!" laughs Roseopal.
"AAAAAHHHH!" wails Mureil covering her face.
Courage's eyes boggle out and realizes what they're going to do! "They're going to COOK us!AAAAA!"
Sure enough, the train is carrying Eustace, Mureil and Courage, towards the open mouth of the stove! Flames lick the inside of it, and Courage screams and covers his eyes-
Suddenly!
"HYAAAAAAAH!"
The riff raff fairys to the rescue!
"STOP RIGHT DER IN DA NAME OF DA LAW!!" shouts a rookie, pointing at the train of freaks.
The other fairy rookies slide down from ropes in the ceiling, and perform fancy ninja kicks and stunts-
"NI BIDDY WAH! POP! CHIM CHIM CHIM CHIM CHA ROOOOO! HIIIII YIIIII! ROOOOO!"
The line comes to a direct halt. Courage sighs. "WHAT TOOK them so long!??"
"GED OUT OF MY DURN KITCHEN!" yells Eustace.
"OH NO! ITS THE RIFF RAFF!" gasps Christi. "RUN AWAYYYY!"
"EEEEEK! RUNAWAAAY!" yells Steel.
"RUN AWAYY RUn awaaay run awayyy.." cry the rest of the freaks, retreating from the kitchen. They drop Mureil and Courage and Eustace on the floor and leave the room in a big delighted panic.
"Liongurl! WHAT'RE WE GOING TO DO!?"pants Christi, running out of the kitchen.
"Well..pant pant..I say we PANT! find Xo and pant pant pant.."
"oh what the heck, LETS GET OUT OF HERE!!"cries Milificent.
The ninja fairys fly after them, and manage to restrain a few freaks- they capture Venus Dark Angel, Fallen Angel, Roseopal Angel, Moon Angel, and Cherry.
The freaks all run screaming their defeat-cries of 'runaway!' and crash through the side of the house, making trails across the landscape of Nowhere, and dissapear into the distance..
* * * *
Dawn rises on Nowhere.
*cue creaky rocking chair music*
The calender says 'Saterday 14' on it. Courage sighs contentedly in Mureil's lap, and she sips her chammomile tea.
"Happily, all has ended well." she says to Courage.
"Blah blah blah." grunts Eustace. "MUREIL! MAKE ME BREKFAST! Where's my Bran? Darn Tv set STILL ain't fixed.."
Courage sighs. "It seems like things are starting to get back to normal afterall.."smiles Mureil.
There is a knock on the door.
"WHo could that be?" Courage asks out loud.
"I wonder who it is.." says Mureil.
"Go answer the stinkin door you stupid dog!"
Courage sighs and answers the door-
*cue ramses theme*
Xo and Agent CHELSEA are there, Xo towering on the left in a black duster with big black buttons on, and large drooping sleeves, black gloves, jeans and curly black elf-shoes, and is holding a briefcase. Chelsea has Dead Kitty wrapped round her neck like a frock, and is still wearing her trench coat and is holding a toolbox which drips blood on the porch.
"Excuse me sir-" says Chelsea in a most twisted voice, with a homicidal glare; "-but did you call for an electrician???" finishes Xo. )
Agent CHELSEA, casts an annoyed sidelong glance at Xo. Xo's left antennae twitches with a sickening noise, like a broken wire and grins wickedly at Courage..
*Cue Ramses theme*
O__________O......
Mureil calls in from the living room-
"Is that the electrician Courage?"^_^
"O________________O..................AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
:D HOOO- DOW! :D