The next morning, Ash took the early train to Saffron City under the pretense of going on an expedition. (Which wasn't a complete lie, since he was on an expedition of sorts…a shopping expedition to find a present for Misty.)
As Ash and Pikachu hopped off of the train and headed for the largest department store in all of Kanto, Ash spotted a familiar face.
"Hi, Professor Oak. What are you doing here?"
Professor Oak, embarrassed at having been caught looking at the women's dresses in the display window at the entrance of the Saffron City Department Store, tried to think of a plausible excuse.
"I…uh, I….I came here to look for some…" He spotted Pikachu. "Some Christmas presents for some of my Pokémon."
"Then why are you looking at the ladies' dresses, Professor? I didn't think Pokémon usually wore clothes."
"Uh, never mind that, Ash." Professor Oak quickly changed the subject. "What are you doing here?"
Now it was Ash's turn to make up an excuse. "Oh, Pikachu and I, we were just…just…um…" Ash's face turned bright red.
Professor Oak smiled. "Still looking for a present for Misty, are you?"
"Yeah," Ash admitted.
A brilliant idea popped into Professor Oak's head. Who better to know what Delia would like than her son?
"I have an idea, Ash. Why don't I come along and help you find something for Misty? After all, isn't that why you came over to see me yesterday?"
"Well, yeah. I guess so."
"How's your cut, by the way? Any problems?"
"It's fine, Professor," Ash said hurriedly. (He was afraid that Professor Oak might still try to give him a tetanus shot when he wasn't looking.) "Why don't we start looking around?" Ash studied the department store directory. "So where do we start, Professor? What do you think Misty would like?"
Professor Oak thought about it for a minute. He really wasn't certain what a teenage girl would like, not having had any daughters of his own. There was his granddaughter, May, but his late wife had always been the one who bought her birthday and Christmas presents. And now that May was in college, she was happy to just receive money.
"Well, why don't we look around and get some ideas? Maybe something will strike your fancy."
As the two headed upstairs to the second floor, Ash noticed that Professor Oak kept looking at the women's clothes.
"Why are you looking at that, Professor? I thought you came here to look for Pokémon presents."
Caught again, Professor Oak quickly tried to make up another excuse.
Well, I guess there's no harm in confiding in the boy.
"All right, Ash. I admit it. I really came here to find a Christmas present for your mother."
"For Mom?" Ash grinned. "I didn't know you liked my mom."
"Uh…well, that is to say…we're friends." Professor Oak's face turned bright red.
"Oh, just friends. I see." Ash smiled conspiratorially and winked.
"Yes, just friends. Like you and Misty. Look, Ash, I'll make a deal with you. I'll help you find a present for Misty if you'll help me pick out something that your mother would like."
"Okay. Let's start over there," Ash said, pointing to the women's department.
---
"Jess, my feet are killing me," James complained as he lugged a huge stack of brightly-wrapped packages through the Saffron City Department Store.
"Be quiet, James," Jessie replied curtly. "I have a lot to carry too, you know," indicating the one small box in her hand. "Besides, the Boss will be more than impressed by the presents we've selected for him. He'll be sure to give us a bonus."
"Yeah, well, we're gonna need it after all the money we've spent on these gifts for him," Meowth said wearily as he shifted the stack of boxes in his paws. "Hey, wait a minute! Look over there. Isn't that one of the twerps?"
The three watched as Ash and Professor Oak wandered aimlessly through the aisles of ladies' garments.
"James," Jessie smiled. "I have a brilliant idea."
"That's what I was afraid of," James sighed. He had noticed the smile spreading across Jessie's face.
"Do you think your mother would like this?" Professor Oak asked, holding up a green sweater.
"Nahh, Mom likes stuff like gardening and cooking," Ash said as he picked up a blue sweater. "I wonder if Misty would…"
"Well, hello there!" Ash turned and saw a crimson-haired saleswoman and a purple-haired salesman standing behind him. "Can we help you with anything?"
"Uh, no thanks. We're just looking," Ash said hastily, somewhat embarrassed at being caught in the women's department.
"Perhaps if you tell us what you're looking for, then maybe we can help you," the salesman inquired helpfully. "A present for a special someone, perhaps?"
"A certain female someone, maybe?" the saleswoman said, smiling.
Ash's face turned bright red as he quickly tossed the sweater with bright pink Butterfrees on it back into the pile on the display table.
"Let's go, Professor," Ash said, grabbing the older man's arm.
"But wait!" interjected the purple-haired salesman. "We're having a special sale today! And it's just for Pokémon trainers. I couldn't help but noticing your adorable Pikachu." James smiled evilly in Pikachu's direction. Pikachu sweatdropped nervously.
Jessie took Ash's arm. "Why don't you tell me all about the twerp…I mean, that special young lady you're buying a present for? Do you think she'd like some perfume?" Jessie whipped out a huge atomizer.
"No thanks," said Ash. After his disastrous encounter with Erika and her perfume store at Celadon City, Ash wanted nothing to do with perfume ever again.
"But it's our latest scent, Sunflora Sunshine!" Jessie sprayed a huge cloud of perfume in Ash's and Professor Oak's faces. Both males started choking and gasping.
"Maybe some jewelry, perhaps?" Meowth, wearing a rhinestone-studded tiara, and James, wearing a full-length strand of pearls, appeared from behind the jewelry counter.
"Aren't these just divine?" James cooed as he admired the pearl bracelet he was also wearing.
"Yes, they're very nice," said Professor Oak, "but they're also way out of our price range. Come on, Ash."
"Wait!" Jessie grabbed Ash's arm. "How about a dress?" Jessie tossed a garment in James' direction. "My associate will model the latest Paris creation while I gather some information about the young woman you're buying for."
"Jess, I'm not…" James whispered as he uneasily regarded the outfit Jessie had tossed to him.
"Just get back there and put the dress on!" Jessie hissed. She then turned her attention to Ash. "Now then, do you know exactly what size your female friend is?"
"Size? I don't know what size Misty is."
"Well, how tall is she?"
"Well, I guess she's a couple of inches taller than me."
Jessie wrote down the information in her notebook. "And what size is her bust?"
Ash's face turned redder than Jessie's hair. "Her what?"
"Never mind," Jessie said as she scribbled some more. "She's pretty flat."
"Wait, how did you know…"
Jessie turned around and peeked behind the curtain where James was getting dressed. "How is everything going in there?"
"Could you find me a girdle, Jessie?"
Jessie drew the curtains back. "While my associate is getting ready, how about I obtain some information about your lady friend," she said, addressing Professor Oak. "How tall is your girlfriend?"
"Ash's mother is not my…"
"You're dating the twerp's mom?" Jessie interrupted, surprised at this bit of information.
"Kissy-kissy!" Meowth teased.
"How sweet! Maybe the two of you will have a double wedding!" Jessie gushed. "Now, what size is your girlfriend's bust?"
"Um, well…it…" Professor Oak cupped his hands in front of his own chest, trying to gauge Delia's proportions. Even though he grossly overestimated the size of Delia's bust, he wasn't aware of it. After all, he thought she had pretty amazing breasts. And hips. And legs.
"Hey, Professor?" Ash noticed that Professor Oak had a faraway, dreamy glance.
Snapped out of his fantasizing about Delia by Ash's question, Professor Oak turned to the boy. "Did you say something, Ash?"
"And now," Jessie announced, "the latest in evening wear, straight from Paris!" She dramatically drew aside the curtain to reveal James in a skintight purple minidress, complete with high heels and feather boa.
Professor Oak and Ash were shocked into silence at the disturbing sight.
"And it even comes with a matching handbag!" James squealed enthusiastically.
"Let's get out of here, Professor," Ash said frantically, gathering up Pikachu.
"Wait!" Jessie blocked their way. "We also have matching fashions for Pokémon, too. Let me see if I can find something for your cute little Pikachu." She grabbed Pikachu and started running in the opposite direction.
"Hey! Gimme back my Pikachu!" Ash shouted.
"Sorry, twerp," said Meowth as he hopped over the counter. "No refunds!"
"Jess, wait! I can't run in heels!" James protested as he struggled to catch up with Jessie and Meowth.
"Pikachu, Thundershock 'em now!" Ash ordered.
As Pikachu let loose with a powerful Thundershock, James caught his heel on the carpet and tripped, causing a manikin to topple into Jessie, who, in turn, fell on top of Meowth.
"Aaaugh! Looks like Team Rocket's underfoot again," Jessie, James, and Meowth said in unison as a display of women's shoes collapsed, burying the three under a mountain of high heels.
"Nice job, Pikachu," Ash congratulated his Pokémon as it leapt onto his shoulder. "But I think we need to take our business somewhere else."