This is the last and final chapter in this little miniseries of mine. Anyway, I apologize for the disorder amongst the chapter (last time I checked, chapter 2 was first) but I don't have the strength to change it… Most of you already read them, anyway….=o)
I AM SO SORRY!!!!!!!!! The reason I haven't updated this chapters in what seems like an eternity, is that I'm graduating high school this year, and I have reports and homework up to my ears, plus I have dance training for the prom in May, so I don't really have much spare time. No excuse, I know, but it's a reason! Hope you can forgive me, along with the length of this chapter. Couldn't seem to get it shorter. Not if I wanted to get everyone's point of view. Btw, this idea came to me whilst driving home (so my dad was driving, and I was daydreaming, but that's details), and I have no idea where it came from. Maybe from some memories of my drunken days, who knows… =o)
I read it through once, and it took me about 20 minutes… I apologize. You might want to work offline for this one…. =o)
One more thing: Here comes Quistis!!!!!!! =o)
Okay, let's get this over with…………
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LAST CONFESSION - THE END
Quistis walked through the halls of Balamb Garden continuously checking her watch. She wasn't late, but her guide was. She'd been told that someone was to meet her, but that someone hadn't come. After an hour of waiting, she had decided to go alone. As she turned a corner, she saw a tall blonde man, casually leaning against the wall. Opposite of him stood another blonde, although this one much shorter. They were arguing. Well, the shorter blonde was arguing, the taller one just stood there, looking at him, ignorantly.
" Fuck you, Seifer! You're gonna pay for this!"
A smirk twisted the taller mans, Seifers, lips, but only for a few seconds.
" Whatever you say, Chickenwuss, whatever you say."
Quistis noticed two things. One; The two young men were very handsome, something appealing in them both. Two; The tension between them weren't the one of two merely fighting. There was something… Sexual… in the air.
Suddenly the shorter blonde discovered Quistis presence and raised an eyebrow at her. She suddenly remembered she'd been eavesdropping.
" Eh… My name's Quistis Trepe, am a reporter. I'm here to interview the SeeDs in Balamb."
The shorter - and younger? - mans face dropped and he looked extremely guilty.
" I'm suppose ta meet ya, weren't I?" he asked.
" Someone was." She smiled. He was cute when he was ashamed.
" I'm sorry. Ya here ta see Commander Leonhart? I can show ya!" Quistis smile widened. From being embarrassed to very willing to please. Talk about mood swings.
" He's like that", Seifer said. " Far from resentful."
" I thought that was a good quality?"
" Well, you've only know him from two minutes. After seventeen years it's rather annoying." Somehow Quistis doubted that that was what he really thought. There seemed to be too much affection in his eyes. In the meantime the other one had turned back to angry now.
" Come on Chicken, you know it's true!"
" For da fifth millionths time, my name's Zell!"
Quistis recognized the name. She'd read in a magazine once. Some Zell Dincht had save a bunch of people from an escaped Grat that had been genetically manipulated. So, he was a hero. Although he didn't act like one. She'd heard it was typically SeeDs. Partially the reason why she'd decided to make an article about them.
" You're Zell Dincht?"
He nodded, proudly.
" Da one 'n' only, at yer service." He bowed, his apparently very lithe body following the motion through, perfectly.
" It's very nice to meet you, Mr Dincht."
" Please", he exclaimed, while Seifer snickered beside her. " Call me Zell!"
" Okay, Zell. If you don't mind, would you be a part of the article? I'd like to interview you to get your…."
" Yer gonna interview me?! Sure, I would. When? Do I have ta change?"
" Yes…. Mr Leonhart decides that…. And no, not if you don't want to."
He looked more confused than ever.
" I think that's more information than his brain can handle", Seifer said, smirking. Zell frowned and if he'd been younger he would probably have put his tongue out. Quistis took that thought back, when Zells tongue quickly emerged between his lips. The light in the corridor made a piercing in his tongue flash as it moved.
Something in Seifers expression changed at the sight of it, and if Quistis didn't know better, she'd probably had taken it for desire.
" Maybe…we should go and see Mr Leonhart?"
Zell immediately turned his attention to her and nodded.
" Sure, just follow me!"
He started walking and Quistis followed. She stopped when she noticed that Seifer didn't follow.
" You're not coming?"
He shook his head.
" No, I'm not a SeeD. Besides, I don't think Leonhart wants me there. Better go after Zell before he runs away."
He began to walk in the opposite direction. There was something weird with the way he walked.
Seifer sighed as he turned a corner and he leant against the wall. Damn that Zell! He just had to turn him on right in front of a reporter. Luckily it hadn't been a man, otherwise it had been too obvious. Too obvious that he had a massive hard-on.
With another sigh he made his way to his dorm room. No way he was going to reveal himself to someone else, especially not in the corridor.
Squall was sitting by his desk, staring at a pile of papers that needed to be signed, desperately trying to make them go away with sheer will-power. It didn't work though, and he'd been at it for the last half hour. He was used to signing papers, and this was no complicated pile, but his thoughts had been elsewhere, and he'd recently discovered he'd signed some with "Zell". Last time he checked, that was not his name.
There was a knock on the door, and he welcomed it, hoping it would take him away from his stuffy office.
" Enter!" No, there was nothing pleading in his voice….
The door opened and Zells head popped in. Squall frowned. Was it really Zell this time? He'd seen the guys face several times before, but before he embarrassed himself again by calling another blonde cadet for Zell, he had to be sure.
" Yes?"
" Hey, Squall. Dat reporter's here now. Should I let 'er in?" Squall nodded and the door swung open. Zell came in to the room, and there was no doubt now, it was him. No one at Garden moved with the same swaying motions, no one else smiled that wicked grin at him, and no one certainly addressed him with "Hey, Squall". Behind him came a blonde woman with glasses and a notebook tightly pressed against her chest. She met his gaze with the confidence of someone who often dealt with people who wasn't good with words. She must have heard the rumours about him, and if she hadn't Zell probably had been kind enough to inform her. And, she was a reporter after all. She could write an entire article about him, without him saying a word. It had been done before.
" Hello, Mr Leonhart. My name is Quistis Trepe. We talked on the phone a few days ago." The tone of her voice showed what she thought. " I talked and you just grunted."
True.
He nodded.
" I asked Mr…. Zell here, to join us. He told me of some other SeeDs I could interview. If that's alright with you."
Squall raised an eyebrow and look at Zell, expecting a full account on which he'd recommended.
" I told 'er 'bout Irvine, Selphie 'n' Xu." Squall nodded again, the three had actually crossed his mind before. They could bring their perspective to Balamb Garden, Selphie and Irvine being transfers and Xu an instructor.
" Good. I have another request, Mr Leonhart", Zell cleared his throat and Quistis nodded. " Squall. If don't mind too much, I'd like to ask Seifer……Was it Almasy?…. To participate. I think his version would appeal to many."
Squall had to admit it, she could choose her words. "If you don't mind too much", his ass!
He glared at Zell. There wasn't much doubt in the question of who had told her about Seifer. That was the one minus with Zell; he couldn't keep his mouth shut.
" Fine."
" Good! When are you free to do this."
Squall looked at the detestable pile of papers. They needed to be signed before lunch.
" Now?"
" Could Irvine Kinneas, Selphie Tilmitt, Seifer Almasy and Xu ?, come to the library immediately."
When they were all gathered, Quistis put out her notebook and looked at them in order as they sat in front of her.
" What I want to know is why you wanted to become SeeDs, and how reality matched your fantasy."
She sat down on a chair, finding an empty page in her notebook, pen ready in hand. For a few minutes there was no answer, then Zell spoke up.
" I became a SeeD 'couse of my grandfather. He taught me ta fight wit my hands instead of weapons, he said dat weapons hurt ya more then they killed others." There was a few agreeing nods from the others, especially from someone with long dark hair and a cowboy hat. Irvine, if she wasn't mistaking.
" And was it anything like you thought?"
Zell looked her straight in her eyes.
" No. Far from."
" What do you mean?"
Zell took a deep breath.
" I met people here, people I never thought I'd…..like."
The way he stared at the floor, told Quistis that the "people" he talked about was present. Or maybe it wasn't "people", but "person".
" Someone else?"
No answers.
" Alright, this seems to be a waste of time. If you'll excuse me, I have to make one phone call."
She stood up and walked out of the library. She had an idea to make these people talk, but she needed permission to use her financial support fully.
" Hi, Kent. It's Quistis. Listen, I'm in need of cash, and I need them now.……What? No, for the article about SeeDs………….. To make them more….talk-active. So far I have pretty much nothing….. Yes. I have an idea, but you have to trust me………… No, off course it's legal (I think)!…. No, I didn't say anything…… So, what do you say?…… Great, I owe you one!….. Oh, and Kent, what angle do you want on the story? I have a feeling that there's a big secret they're hiding. All of them…….. You won't be disappointed! Bye!
She hung up and walked back to the others.
" Okay, people! Let's move out!"
" Where to?"
" You'll see….."
Xu followed the reporter, walking right behind Squall, watching him take those breathtaking steps. She bit her lip. Hadn't she told her self NOT to stare at the Commanders ass? She was almost positive she'd done that. Seifer walked beside her, eyes lost somewhere in front of him. His posture wasn't the one it used to, he seemed more casual today. She wasn't used to see him… calm…around Squall, but they hadn't even looked at each other. Squall didn't even glare, something he usually was very good at.
Zell walked next to the reporter, she hadn't gotten her name, and talked. Probably a more detailed version of why he was a SeeD. Selphie and Irvine walked behind her, hand in hand. But they seemed tense together, as if the hand-holding was a duty, and if she wasn't mistaking completely, their eyes were set on her. She could feel them burn holes in her.
Suddenly she heard a shrilling scream and be damned if Rinoa didn't meet them by the entrance.
" Where are you guys going?"
She looked so innocent, but Xu knew better, and when she received that cold stare from Rinoa, she knew that the girl wasn't too pleased about the idea that they where to leave Garden without her knowledge. Xu shoot a glance at the reporter and hoped that the woman would not tell her. She herself had no idea where they were heading.
" Oh, you're that reporter, aren't you?" How the hell could she know everything?
" Yes, my name is Quistis Trepe."
" Nice to meet you, Miss Trepe. What are you writing about?"
" SeeDs."
" These SeeDs?" Rinoa asked, her hand including everyone before her. Quistis nodded.
" Then I have to come, I know all about them."
Xu sighed. Off course, what had she thought? Rinoa always found a way to be around Squall. The only highlight in this little encounter with Gardens highest ranked Bitch, was that Squall was mildly interested in Rinoas interference. Not at all interested, actually. It warmed Xus heart.
Selphie could nothing but sigh. Just her luck. Rinoa was a leach, being everywhere. She glanced at Xu, who seemed surprisingly content about something. She had a small smile on her lips, eyes focused on something she couldn't quite see. But she had her ideas. Squall. She'd noticed that Xu had some kind of infatuation about the Commander. It ached in her heart at this knowledge, but there was nothing she could do. She felt Irvines hand squeeze hers, and she squeezed back, giving him a blinding smile. She hated doing this to him, but right now, she craved vanilla.
Quistis led them to a small bar in town, at night a club, but at the moment fairly empty, it was barely after one o'clock.
" Everyone sit down, and I get the Tequila."
There was a few confused looks, but when Zell sat down at a table in the far end of the bar, the others followed.
Zell pretended to be busy with a napkin he was tearing apart, but he on carefully chosen opportunities glanced at either Squall or Seifer. Neither of them looked very happy being where they were, but surprisingly, none of them had complained very loud about this arrangement.
Quistis came back with two bottles of Silver Tequila and 7 shot glasses.
" For each question I ask you, before you answer, take a shot of Tequila." Zell smiled. He'd played this game once before. It was rather amusing, if you were the one asking the questions. After a few shots, no one seemed to care about dignity, honour, or law, for that matter. He decided to make himself as invisible as possible, so he could stay sober, hearing all the secret and thoughts that became revealed. Especially from Squall. It could be rather useful to learn new things about the mysterious Commander.
Quistis poured the liquor in the glasses and put one in front of everyone.
" Alright, everyone has a glass? Good, I start with you, Zell: Favorite childhood memory."
Easy question. When he was adopted by the Dinchts. He put the glass to his lips, twisted his wrist, and drank. The tequila burned in his throat.
" When I was five years old….."
The game seemed to continue forever. Quistis wanted to get to the "important" questions as soon as possible, but some seemed to be more alcohol tolerant than others. Irvine already seemed to be on the verge of passing out, while Squall didn't look affected at all.
She decided she'd try him, a personal question.
" Squall", she said, and before she had asked the question, he'd taken the shot. Okay.
" Who do you like the most in this gang."
He looked around, eyeing each and everyone, as if he saw them for the first time, wondering what the hell these people was sitting by his table.
" I like Xu the most. She's not trying to marry me, or kill me, if there's a difference."
Quistis raised an eyebrow. Squall wasn't all that good with alcohol.
" Great. Next one's Seifers…."
" Wait a minute!" Squall frowned at her, glaring at the glass in his hand. " I don't love 'er though."
All eyes now rested on the normally so quiet and reserved Commander. Luckily, everyone seemed to be a little fussy in the head.
" Then who do you love?" Quistis asked softly. This could be good.
" A shot first, remember?" She nodded, filling his glass. He drank it without hesitating.
When he stopped grimacing he stared blankly at the air above him.
" Squall?"
" What?"
" I asked you a question."
" Oh? What was it?"
" Who do you love?"
Another look at his glass, but apparently he decided he had had enough.
" Someone close to me. Someone I've known for a long time."
A long, anticipating silence.
" He's….. He's my best friend."
Quistis glanced at Zell who suddenly stared at Squall openly. She had pretty much already guessed they were close friends. Squall looked up, meeting Zells deep blue eyes.
" You love Zell?" Rinoa asked, her voice thick, with confusion, anger and…..hurt?
" Yes, and no." Quistis frowned. Had he lost it completely?
Seifer couldn't decide who he should look at. Squalls thoughtful expression, or Zell, like the others, utterly confused. He himself had a rather good idea what was about to come. Squall was going to confess his feelings to Zell. Should he stop him? Two things could happen: 1, Zell becomes grossed out and never wants to talk to Squall again, in which case Seifer could stop hoping, or 2, Zell tells Squall he loves him too, and then Seifer could stop hoping too. Although he rather wanted the first. Seeing Zell with Squall would hurt too much. There was a third alternative too, one he almost didn't dare to think of. Zell would say he didn't love Squall, he was in love with someone else. This alternative would only be good if Zell actually admitted he was gay, and that someone else was Seifer.
So it was with equal excitement and fear that Seifer awaited Squalls confession.
Squall swallowed. The tequila still burned in his throat, but he barely noticed it anymore. But he was aware of everyone staring at him. He didn't really understand why, what he had to say was obvious to anyone.
" I love him, as a friend. But that's not all…." He silenced again, meeting the eyes of the boy he loved so much. He tried to read his beautifully blue eyes, if there was any sign of…….anything. He thought he could decipher….hope?
" I'm in love with him too!"
There, now it was said. Just await the verdict.
Rinoa choked. What was this? A joke? Had Squall really said what she thought he'd said? Judging by everyone else's reactions, apparently. The only one not looking affected by this was Seifer. Why?
That thought quickly disappeared in a river of foul words that was directed at Squall. She stood up, glaring at him.
" Squall, how dare you! Leading me on like this! I can't believe you can be so……false!"
She silenced, her gaze falling upon the glass he held in his hand. Maybe it was all the liquor? He'd been drinking a lot. Most of Quistis' questions was directed to him.
" Squall, I hope you don't remember this tomorrow, and if you do, that you don't feel too guilty about it. I just want you to know that I forgive you, and it will all be the same tomorrow."
Squall put down the glass and stood up, leaning over the table so his face was just an inch from hers. She could feel his hot breath in his face. He smelled sour.
" Rinoa. If I wake up tomorrow, and you're not there, I'd be thrilled."
She felt her entire heart break at his words. He could not possibly mean this!
" You've been after me since day one, and I've tried to make you realize that I don't love you. I never have, and I never will. My love belongs to someone else", he looked at Zell with longing eyes, making Rinoas eyes water. He'd never looked at her like that.
" I would have hoped that there was some nicer way to tell you this, but there isn't. Not in a way that you'd understand. I. Don't. Want. You."
He had to be drunk, he didn't know what he was saying. But still, her tears kept streaming down her cheeks. Why was he doing this to her? She loved him! With words stuck in her throat she ran out of the bar, and the door was shut behind her.
Zell could hardly breath. Had Squall really said what he had heard? It was way to unbelievable to be true. He'd dreamt about this moment, and when it finally came, it wasn't at all what he'd expected it to be. Maybe it was because Squall was drunk, like himself, and the reaction was just numbed, or….maybe he didn't love Squall in that way. He looked at the Commander closely, into those smoke grey eyes, and came to a decision.
" I'm in love with you too Squall."
There was no way to describe the relief in Squalls eyes when his brain registered the words meaning. He gave Zell a smile, a real smile, and reached out a hand for him to hold. Zell smiled back, taking his hand, lightly caressing it with his thumb.
By some reason his gaze drifted to Seifer, and his happiness was instantly forgotten. Seifers face was completely blank, but his eyes showed so much disappointment and hurt that Zell wanted to cry. And then it hit him.
Seifer had always teased him about Zell hanging around Squall, and lately the jokes had been pin-point accurate.
" So Chicken, been drooling over Squall again, now have you? I wonder what he'd say if I told him."
" Fuck you Seifer. You're gonna pay for this!"
" Whatever you say, Chickenwuss, whatever you say.
It was almost painfully clear. Seifer loved Squall too.
Selphie watched the outcome with interest. It was almost too much for her to grasp after almost eight shots. She looked over to Xu who stared at Squall. Selphie sighed. She'd been right. Xu had it bad for Squall. Very bad. And now the love of her life told her, along with everyone else, that he was gay. And in love with Zell. Life could be a bitch on occasion.
Suddenly she heard someone call her name.
" What?"
Quistis smiled at her and held out the tequila bottle.
" It's your turn Selphie, the game's not over yet."
Selphie obediently extended her glass and had it refilled.
" So, what's the question?"
" Drink first." And Selphie drank.
" What's your favorite memory since you came to Garden?"
Selphie thought a while.
" It must have been………… my first lesson with Xu."
The tequila made her head spin and she could hardly focus on anyone.
" Why?" she heard someone ask. She half expected someone to refill her glass again, but when no one did, she answered anyway.
" Coz that's the first time I saw her."
Irvine frowned. He hadn't gotten many questions, but the tequila had still clouded his mind. Although Quistis must have thought he was more drunk than he was, because she hadn't asked him many questions the past half hour and he was starting to sober up. He'd only registered Squalls confession half, but when he heard these words, so similar to his own thoughts, he had pulled himself through the daze.
He looked at Selphie, she seemed to be far away in her own world, and realized that she didn't know someone else was listening, especially not him.
" Why is that so special to you?" he asked, not caring that it was Quistis who were supposed to ask the questions. She looked up and blinked a few times.
" That's when I fell in love with her."
Irvine looked over to Xu, who now stared at Selphie. If he wasn't mistaking, she almost look….scared. Her eyes met his, and a chock ran through his body. She was genuinely breathtaking. She stood up on shaky legs.
" I….need to……I need some fresh air", she said, slowly walking towards the door. Selphie saw her leave, tears running down her cheeks, before she too stood up, although heading in the opposite direction. Irvine was pulled in the two different directions. The gentleman in him wanted to comfort them both, but he had the feeling Selphie wanted to be alone at the moment, so he went after Xu.
Seifer felt so empty. He'd lost. He was, once again, the loser. He shook his head slowly, resting his forehead against the knuckles of his clenched fist, eyes closed.
He suddenly felt a hand on his shoulder.
" Seifer."
It was Zell. On the other side of the table, Squall glared at him. Seifer glared back. What was that asshole looking so pissed about? He was the one going home with the first price.
" What?" His voice was harder than he wanted, he wasn't mad at Zell.
" I…..want to talk to you….in private. If that's ok?"
Seifer raised an eyebrow, seeing Squall mimic.
" I guess. Where?"
" Outside."
Seifer stood up, wondering what the hell was going on. Zell gave Squall one of those adorable smiles then followed Seifer outside.
He stopped by a fountain, sitting down on the edge.
" Seifer. I…." There was a long silence, and the hurt still ate a hole through his heart and Seifer wanted to go home and kill something. Preferably Squall.
" What it is, Chicken? I don't have all day."
" I know what you feel", Zell said bluntly. Seifer head jerked up, confused green eyes met reassuring blue ones.
" What…?"
" I know what it's like to love someone you can't have, Seifer. That's what I'm talking about." He spoke surprisingly normal English. Seifer sat down next to him.
" So? You got the one you want."
Something unreadable flashed over Zells face before he continued.
" Maybe. You didn't though."
" Thanks, just rub it in."
" That's not what I meant. Seifer, for the last few years I've been madly in love with Squall. And I never realized that I only needed to know that he loved me back, and that I was ok with that. Just that." Seifer could see that these words hurt Zell more than his previous ones had hurt Seifer. Tears was gleaming in the corner of his baby blue eyes and Seifer was getting nervous.
" What are you talking about?!"
" I'm talking about you, Seifer. And Squall. I know you love him. And it's ok, you can have him. I just needed to know that he loved me. I don't know why you hated me, when Squall hasn't shown any interest in me, until now, but I guess you know that better than me. But I…. I know how it feels, and I don't want anyone else to go through it. All that pain. That's why I'm giving up on Squall."
Seifer couldn't speak. Was Zell willing to give up the love of his life, because he didn't want Seifer to hurt? What hurt Seifer was the tears now running down Zells perfect face.
" Zell…."
" No, don't say anything. I don't want to know. Just be happy, ok?" Then he stood up and left.
Seifer was in chock. What had just happened? He didn't even want Squall! He took a few steps after Zell.
" No, Seifer. Go to him." Zell stared running, quickly disappearing out of sight.
Seifer sighed.
" But I want you, Zell. I only want you."
Xu sat by a big tree, her face in shadow by the thick branches. She didn't know what to do. Selphie was in love with her? It had come like a surprise. There had been no signs of her feelings before. Or, had there been? Those long burning stares she sometimes had felt around Selphie, well, she had never taken them as a sign of lust. Never. Why would she have?
She heard someone behind her and prayed is wasn't Selphie. Not now. She needed to think about this.
" Xu?"
Irvines accent made her relax, a little. After all, he was, or had been, Selphies boyfriend.
She turned her head so she could see him in the corner of her eye.
" Irvine. Guess this came as a chock for you too."
He walked to stand beside her, waiting for her permission to sit down.
" You kidding? I thought I'd heard wrong. Guess I don't blame her, though."
Xu frowned.
" What? Why not?"
Irvine seemed to ponder for a while.
" Some other time, maybe. You've had enough for today."
Xu shook her head.
" No, I want to know. No more secrets, Irvine."
He sighed, deeply, which revealed to Xu that this was hard for him to say. Was she really ready to hear it?
" I mean, you are a beautiful woman. I shouldn't be surprised that she fell for you."
A faint smile appeared on Xus lips. She patted his knee and sighed.
" Thanks Irvine. It's nice to know that you think that. I hope there's no hard feelings between us. I mean, since I unconsciously stole your girlfriend."
Irvines smile faded.
" No hard feelings. I have no right to those."
Okay, now she was confused.
" What are you saying? No rights?"
He shook his head.
" Yes, no rights. She's been cheating on me, as much as I've been cheating on her." She raised an eyebrow. What was really going on? All the liquor in her system made her a bit scatterbrained.
Irvine seemed shy, she hadn't thought that the young cowboy could be shy.
" You've been cheating on Selphie? Why? With who?"
She didn't care that her questions might be considered offensive.
" With the same person that she cheated on me with."
" But that would mean….. Oh. My. God! Irvine! You're telling me you have a crush on me too?"
Irvine shook his head, eyes focused on the ground.
" No?" Xu asked, bewildered.
" No, I don't have just a crush on you, Xu! I'm madly in love with you. It's crazy, I know, we've hardly even talked. But…. It doesn't change what I feel!"
Her brain was working overtime, and she breathed heavy.
" For…. For how long?"
" Over a year, maybe more. Let's say since I came to Garden. That would mean that Selphie has the advantage, but… Xu, I'm sorry. I didn't mean to put all of this on you. I don't want to scare you away."
" I'm not that easy to scare, Mr Kinneas. I don't ever want to her you call me weak."
" I would never."
She smiled and realized that she wasn't repulsed by his confession. She didn't feel the need to go away and think it over. And Squall hadn't surfaced in her mind since they stared to talk. Maybe this was some kind of sign? Fate? Maybe this was Destiny's way of telling her to move on, and just live her life.
" Irvine. I…. If there's a chance that you still…..like me in that way, I'd like to try."
" Try what?" She could hear the hope in his voice, and it made her smile.
" Try a relationship. I need to get out more."
Irvines eyes lit up and he gave her a quick kiss.
" Xu, I swear to you, I'll take you out as much as you wish. And I'll pay every time."
" Don't kill yourself, Irvine. Don't forget who makes the most money…"
He smiled again and kissed her. She closed her eyes and sighed. Maybe this was just what she needed.
Rinoa wiped her face with a tissue and snuffled. How could this be? She was sitting on a bench in the park opposite of the bar. If she saw Squall leave, preferably alone, she'd follow and demand an explanation. Or maybe she would wait to the next day. Squall seemed to have a terrible mood when he was drunk.
She didn't notice the suffocated sobs from behind her until that person just couldn't hold them in anymore. She turned around and frowned upon the sight that meet her. Selphie was crying? The constantly cheery girl was sad?
" Selphie?"
Selphie looked up, obviously surprised by Rinoas presence.
" Oh, hi. Didn't know you were there."
For some reason Rinoa felt compassion for the girl, and she did something she'd never done before in her life. She cared.
" What's the matter?"
Selphie shrugged.
" Everything's the matter. Seems like I've lost most of the things in my life that I held dear."
Rinoa nodded, recognizing every word, feeling Selphies pain in her own heart.
" It's awful when it happens, don't you think. You just want to crawl up and die!"
Selphie looked at her with compassion in her eyes.
" Oh, Rin. I'm so sorry, I forgot…."
Rinoa smiled. "It's ok, I've realized that there's nothing I can do about it. I've accepted it, it's just the dealing part left."
" The hardest part…"
" Yeah…"
Silence. Not an uncomfortable silence, just silence. There was nothing left to say, they both felt the same way, they both understood. They would deal together. How funny it even sounded, Rinoa and Selphie, like water and oil, would deal with their losses together.
Squall still sat by the table, Quistis on the other side.
" You ok?" she asked, head tilted to the side. Squall looked up, meeting her gaze.
" Yeah, shouldn't I be?"
" I meant the hang over."
" Oh." Squalls head pounded. " It sucks."
" Here", she handed him an aspirin. " Hope it helps."
He excepted it, gladly. He'd been hoping for some way to get rid of the pain, but was to ashamed to ask. Yes, ashamed. He was the Commander, and he was drunk…
" You've felt this way about Zell for a long time?" He nodded.
" Too long."
" Guess that Seifer must have been a pain in the ass in the mean time. Must be why you hate each other."
Squall frowned.
" What?"
" I mean, having Seifer being in love with the same guy, must be hard to deal with."
Squalls face dropped, head spinning, and he swallowed hard. Seifer? In love with Zell?
" Impossible", he breathed, mostly to himself.
Quistis shrugged.
" Not really. Saw it the first time I saw them in the hall corridor." She frowned. " You mean, you didn't know?"
Squall shook his head. Had he been letting Seifer run around Garden, unattended, being in love with Zell. It couldn't be!
Suddenly Seifer came through the door. Squall stood up, regretting he'd left Lionhart at home. He wanted to decapitate him!
" You…. I'm…. Fuck you, Seifer!"
He looked startled, only for a few seconds, before he went into battle-mode.
" What's you problem now, Leonhart?"
" You!"
" Why's that?" Squall chewed his lip, he really didn't know why Seifer was the problem, he just was. Zell had told Squall that he was in love with him too, and Seifer had lost. But what was the deal about them talking in private? He growled.
" You want Zell." Seifer flinched, glared at Quistis who looked mighty innocent by the table, then stared back at Squall.
" So? He don't want me."
" Doesn't matter. If you as much as look at him, I'll have you….."
" Have me what?"
" Think of something later." The aspirin hadn't started to do it's business yet. " But it won't be good."
" Don't worry, Leonhart. I'm leaving. Going to Esthar, maybe I can start a new life there, without you….without….Zell." He took a deep breath, and Squall realized how much he must hurt. He almost felt sorry for him. That kind of pain was hard to bear.
He couldn't find any words to say.
" So, you see Squall. You'll be having him all to yourself."
" Good."
Seifer snarled.
" I'm not saying you deserve him though."
" Neither do you…"
Seifer smirked, but his eyes remained dark.
" Fine." He stared to walk towards the door.
" Oh, I almost forgot. Zell gave up his rights to you. He thought I was in love with you, probably misunderstood my reaction when he….. Well, doesn't matter now. Anyway, he said that I could have you. If you really love him, Leonhart, I suggest you find him, soon, and sort this out."
Seifer opened the door.
" And, Squall. Tell him…..what I feel about him, please?" The word sounded so strange, coming from Seifer, but it made an impact on Squall. Must mean a lot to him, if he actually was prepared to ask Squall for a favour.
" Alright Seifer. I will."
Seifer nodded, sighed, then left. Squalls defences dropped, and he felt himself shiver. This was way to complicated for him, he needed to think it through, have a plan, in case…..
" Go find him, Squall", Quistis stood up. " Tell him it's him, and only him, that you want. Also tell him about Seifers feelings. It's the right thing to do."
Squall nodded.
" I know, and I will. I just need to find him."
" Squall, where would you be?"
Seifer was on his way to the train station, after packing his most essential things. He drove by the beach, looking over the clear blue water, the color reminding him of Zells eyes. Suddenly he caught the glimpse of someone sitting on one of the cliffs. Blonde hair shining in the sun. Seifer thought the car stopped by itself, before he saw his foot on the break. Before thinking further, he was out of the car, walking towards the cliffs.
" Zell. Come down a sec, will you?"
He saw Zell hesitate before climbing down, strong arms keeping him safe.
" What is it, Seifer? Ya told Squall about…?" Seifer shook his head.
" Why not?!"
" I don't love Squall, Zell."
" Ya don't? But when he told me he loved me, ya look like ya wanted ta kill me."
" Why would I want to kill the love of my life, Zell?"
It took a while before the shorter blonde fully understood what he really meant.
" Ya mean….me?" Seifer nodded.
" You, Zell. Just you."
Zell looked….confused. Why? It should be crystal clear. Seifer wanted Zell.
" What, Zell?
" It's just dat…Seifer, I'm in love with you too. I…thought dat ya….never mind."
" Doesn't matter." Seifer voice sounded weak. " I understand."
" So…what do we do?"
" Nothing. I'm leaving for Esthar now. I'm leaving for good. I just…wanted to tell you this in person. Zell, please be happy with Squall. Don't let him treat you wrong, otherwise I'll rip his cold heart out. Deal?"
The tears overflowing in Zells eyes made him mute, so he nodded.
" There's just one thing I'd like to do, before I go…" He cupped Zells chin with his hand, but before he could do or say anything more, Zell threw himself around his neck, crushing his lips against Seifers.
The kiss lasted for one, glorious minute before Seifer pulled away.
" I need to go now Zell. If I stay any longer, I won't be able to leave you."
" So don't."
" I have to. I love you Zell."
" I love you too."
" That's all I wanted to hear. Don't forget me, ok?"
" Ok." Seifer walked to the car, forcing himself not to turn around. When he came to the car he looked back at Zell, now standing tall and beautiful, staring out over the sea.
" I'll never forget you, my Chickenwuss."
Squall took a deep breath before stepping onto the sand. He'd been watching Zell for a few minutes, afraid of approaching.
" Hey Squall". Zell turned around, head to the side, hands in his pockets.
" How did you…?"
" I'm train to notice things behind me, Squall. You can't surprise me." Squall nodded walking to stand beside Zell.
" Why are ya here, Squall?"
" Stupid question, Dincht. Try again." Zell looked up at the blue sky.
" Maybe, you're here ta fulfil one of my fantasies?"
" Well, not really. But I would like to."
" Good. But first tell me why you're really here."
" I'm here to tell you how I feel, Zell. So there's no misunderstandings. I love you, and I'm in love with you. I hope that's clear. And…"
Zell put his hand on Squalls shoulder, smiling.
" Wow, Squall. Chill a bit. If I'm not mistaking, y were 'bout ta break da record in "most said words by n iceberg". Listen, I understand. And I feel da same way. I thought dat was clear since I not only told you, I told everyone I know. Gotta count for somethin' right?"
Squall nodded.
" So, 'bout dat fantasy…"
Squall leaned forward, gently pressing his lips to Zells, making the younger boy hiss. His tongue ran over the bottom lip, pushing inside Zells mouth.
It was hot, steaming hot, and none of them wanted to pull away.
" Zell", Squall breathed.
" Mhmm."
" Let's get back to Garden. I have some papers to sign."
Zell laughed.
" Only if ya promise ta spend some time wit me after."
Squall smiled a devilish smile, making Zell raise a brow.
" I kinda meant dat ya'd help me", Squall said, mimicking Zells pronunciation. " Then we can spend as much time as we want…."
" Like da sound of dat…"
THE END (of the main story, an epilogue follows)
****************************************************************************
Okay, this is it. Like I said, I have the epilogue left. If I didn't have it, this chapter would be even longer, and I really don't want that….
Anyways, like to thank everyone who's reviewed. I can't thank each and every one of you enough!
Later! // Zierra