By LTS & Llama ^.^
Rating: PG-13
Warnings: This fic is a Humor; play contains shouen-ai and sillyness
Keywords: Aya, Youji, Ken, Omi, Schuldich, Crawford, Fireworks, Driving, America

Comments: This is another humor ficlet in play form that was co-written by me and author Llama. It is pointless and silly. It's also rated PG-13 and includes some brief shounen-ai like scenes between Ken and Omi and Yoji and Aya. It was written especially for the 4th of last year and also in dedication to Aya's birthday!!

A Weiß Kreuz Independence Day in America:

Scene One: Cotton Candy and Cowboy Hats


Enter Yoji wearing a cowboy hat and leather bound boots, chewing a wad of gum. Aya is sighing looking at a red, white and blue flag and avoiding the large mound of cotton candy beneath a pair of blue eyes and shorts.

Yoji: Man, I never thought America could be so fun!
Ken: Yoji, you look ridiculous... take off that hat!
Yoji: *chewing on gum and spits* ANd whats this about a Rodeo? I bet we'll find some ladies there!
Aya: We're not going. We came to find Persia, then leave.
Omi: But Aya! This is America's Independence Day! We should celebrate too!
Ken: *drooling at Omi's cotton candy* Can I have some?
Omi: *giggles, standing on his tip-toes trying to see over the mound of pink fluff* Here!
Aya: So you're telling me all they do on their holiday is munch candy and hold up flags?
Yoji: And drink! Drink! They gotta drink!
Omi: Yoji-kun! We can't do that! I'm underaged!!!
Yoji: What's an american holiday without some liquor, man! *slapping Ken on the shoulder*
Ken: *staring at Yoji* Yoji, I don't think cowboy is your style.
Omi: But Yoji-kun looks so sexy with a cowboy ha-- errr, I mean... *sweatdrops*
Aya: *coughs* Um... guys... we need to find Persia. Now.
Ken: We better listen to him- he might attack some strange man at the parade and call him Takatori!
Aya: *glares* I will not. I'm over that now.
Ken: The doctor said you weren't yet.
Aya: Am too.
Ken: Are not!
Omi: Ken-kun! Aya-kun!
Yoji: Oh man! Look at those LEGS! *watches some cowgirl walk by* Howdy Miss!
*she glares at him*
Aya: *grabs Yoji by the ear* Let's go.

Scene Two: The Fireworks Stand


Aya is driving down the road, Yoji is sitting in the front seat beside him and Omi and Ken are shoved in the backseat with a 24 pack of Budweiser. Yoji went shopping.

Yoji: Allllright! Look at those stands! I wonder what they sell over there!
Ken: They look so sparkly! Oooh! The sign says fireworks! What are those?
Yoji: *snorts* Stupid! Fireworks, firecrackers! Dude! We should pull over Aya!
Aya: Iie. I am not letting you have firecrackers.
Yoji: *whines* Come on Aya! Be a sport! What's the fourth of july without fireworks!
Ken: Yeah! Fireworks so I can snuggle up with someone special when the finale goes off!
Omi: *blinks* Whose that Ken?
Ken: *glares and whispers* You stupid!
Yoji: Ken? Hand Yoji a beer will you?
Omi: *pinks* Ke-Ken-kun! That's not a beer!
Ken: *chuckle*
Aya: What do you know about the 4th of July anyway? ...you would be better celebrating a birthday or something...
Yoji: *smirks* Oh! That reminds me of the time I went to my friend Dana's birthday and she wanted me to jump naked out of the cake--
Ken: Yoojiii! Not this story again! *shoves a beer in Yoji's hand*
Yoji: Oooh! Beer gooood. *starts to chug it*
Omi: *blinks* Anou... I could be wrong Yoji-kun, but isn't drinking alcoholic beverages in the car illegal in this state?
Aya: in this state? try all of them. *glances at Yoji* I'm getting tired of you.
Yoji: *pauses from drinking* Wha? Who? Me?
Omi: No he meant the other guy named Yoji Kudou who is drinking in the car.
Ken: *grabs Omi* I bet I could start my own fireworks back here!
Omi: Meep!
Aya: you're trying too hard to convince everyone
Omi: *crawls over the case of beer that was jabbing his thigh and makes himself more comfortable on Ken's side*
Yoji: *smirk* I could try to convince something else to BE hard. *leans over against Aya as he drives*
Ken: *grins and slips his hand casually under Omi's shirt* Oooh, I think I'm gonna like the "fireworks show" this year.
Aya:the only one of you I would trust with fireworks is Omi *ignores Yoji*
Omi: *smiles at Ken* don't tickle...
Ken: *grins and slips his hand back out* I wouldn't be too sure about that even...
Yoji: *smirk* Oh, but Aya! I wanted to try and heat you up-- Oh! Another fireworks stand! Pull over! *Yoji grabbed the wheel, forcing Aya off the dirt road and onto the path, nearly crashing over an old lady with a walker*
Ken: Ahhhh! *falls against Omi's chest* We're gonna die!!!!!
Omi: *laughs and hugs Ken*
Aya: *gets the car back under control, then turns on Yoji* You'll get me heated up all right! You should respect your elders. You can help that old woman!
Old woman outside: Ahhhh! I'm gonna die! Somebody--!!!
*a red head comes out of nowhere and picks the woman up, seeming like he was flying, he landed on the roof of the black car that Aya was driving. (on the right side mind you)
Ken: That was close!
Yoji: *laughs and points* Ha! I don't have to! See? Somebody else did! Wait a minute... that red head looks familiar.. where'd he go?
Omi: I hear that near death experiences make you horny...
Ken: *grins and nods* Are you thinking what I'm thinking?
Red-head on roof: Are you alright oba-san?
Old woman: Oh! I owe you my life!
Red-head: ~You bet you do. You weren't exactly light.~
Old woman: What was that voice? That voice in my head! Oh I've lost it again!
Red-head: ~No, that was me.~
Yoji: *jumps out of car pointing* Look! On the roof! It's a dog! It's a man! No! It's Schuldich-baka!
Schuldich: *cackles loudly* Ah! Kudou! You found me out!
Yoji: Get him!!!!!
Ken: Hm, what? I'm sorta busy....
Aya: Fine, go play with Schuldich... I think I'll buy myself some firecrackers... *walks off, muttermutter* Maybe killing you will be a good birthday present...
Omi: He helped that poor old lady when you endangered her, I don't think we need to chase him... besides *glomps Ken* we're busy
Ken: *nodnodnodgropegrope*
Yoji: *glares after Aya then looks back at Schuldich* You fiend! How dare you try and molest that old woman!
Old woman: *looking at Schu* Really? *grins and flutters her eyelashes* Is THAT what he was doing?
Schu: *motions to the man at the fireworks stand and winks* ~That's right Crawford, pretend to sell fireworks. Good boy. Have a cookie.~
Omi: Yoji-kun, go after Aya, ne?
Crawford: I knew this was going to happen. ~And you know I do not like cookies.~
Aya: *muttermutter* shove it up....
Yoji: *glares at Schu and gives a quick, hero pose to Omi* I'll... be back.
Ken: *grins nibbling on Omi's ear* Take your time! Really, no hurry at all!
Schuldich: ~Tough. I'm going to feed you one later. Now distract Aya, and for God's sake untuck that shirt! Look like a real fireworks smuggler, I mean salesman!~
Crawford: You want some of these or what, kid?
Aya: *muttermutter... notices him and stares... and then laughs*
Omi: *sprawls out* I knew we should have rented a bigger car...
Crawford: what is your problem?
Ken: *nods* Yeah, I keep getting my foot stuck in the opening of Yoji's beer box!
Yoji: Aya! I'm here to rescue you! *pantpants and leans his arm on Aya's shoulder* Ooooh shiny things! *looks behind Crawford at the goodies*
Aya: You're wearing jeans and a t-shirt. They don't seem like you, Crawford.
Crawford: Crawford? eh?
Omi: let's put it up front, so we can have the back just to us
Yoji: *starts to drool* Oooh... explosives... Whose Crawford? *stare* Hey, Mister... can I have 200 boxes of those... big round thingies with the pointy ends?
Ken: *grins and kisses him* Mm, sure, I'll just drop it in Yoji's seat!
Aya: sell him any and die... but I'll buy a box if you help me kill him
Yoji: *glares at Aya* What is your problem!?! I want my firecrackers, that's all baby! *winks at Crawford, still oblivious to who he is*
Schuldich: ~We got Kudou on our hands, go ahead and sell him some, Bradley dear, but make sure you put a tracker on them so we can have them go off in the wrong direction on the Weiss boys!~
Crawford: ~don't call me Bradley~ sorry kid, I don't kill people.
Schu: *snerk*
Crawford: And this is a business... and he wants more than you do...
Omi: *nudges Ken's shirt up*
Aya: You're a murderer, Crawford... but I'll take them all. Yoji is not getting any.
Yoji: *glaring at Aya* What the hell is wrong with you Fujimiya!? Fireworks stand sellers don't KILL people! Don't talk like this in public! And I want some! I want some! *whine*
Ken: Omi... *slides his hands underneath Omi's shorts, making funny noises*
Aya: Open your eyes, Yoji. This is not a fireworks seller
Yoji: *stands and tries to open his eyes wider, then laughs and takes his sunglasses off* Ah! No wonder I couldn't see!
Ken: Omi... remove your... your... u-u-under-- *blushblushblush*
Omi: underwhat, Ken-kun? *kisskiss*
Crawford: I'm surprised you're still alive...
Yoji: Me too!
Aya: I don't know him...
Ken: *his face the color of a tomatoe* Und- Under- Underwe-- Panties!!! *he finally said panting*
Yoji: *blinks* You don't know who? *turns back to Crawford* Anyway, now that I can actually see all your explosives, I'd like that large illegal cannon in the back and your-- wait a minute! Illegal! Hm.. *thinks* ~ cool.~
Schuldich: ~Your brains are really starting to go.~
Yoji: Who said that?!
Aya: *turns to Crawford* Look, it's my birthday, would you do me a special favor? Sell him that and then set it to explode in his face?
Yoji: *chokes and turns back, thwaping Aya in the face by accident* It is not! I can't believe it! It's Independece day and now you're trying to take more credit again! Just like the time I--
Schuldich: ~Hm, interesting. It's the leader's birthday. This should set a big surprise after he "blows out the candles".~ *starts to cackle loudly on top of the car roof*
Aya: First you hit on me and now you hit me, Yohji... prepare to die
Yoji: *blinks* Ara! Ken! Omi! HELLLP! *grabs the explosives and runs back towards the car*
Ken: *holding Omi's boxers up in his mouth* Oh, shit!
Aya: *gets that look like Yohji is now Takatori Yohji, runs after him*
Omi: not even a moment's privacy
Crawford: hey you didn't pay for those
Yoji: AHHHHH! Quick open the door Ken! I'm gonna drive us the hell outta here!
Ken: What!? I can't find my underwear! *sweatdrop*
Crawford: ~the slut has stolen from me!~ *chases as well*
Omi: *eeps* don't open it, I don't want him to see me naked!
Aya: *catches up and slams Yohji against the car door*
Yoji: Ahhh! Helpppp! *is holding a beer can and stuffs the cold thing down Aya's shirt and jumps in the car starting it up and bursting off down the road*
Ken: Wait! My leg's caught in the door!!!
Yoji: No time for waiting! I've got two angry red-head's after me! *notices that Schuldich is still on the roof*
Schu: *plops his head on the windshield* Why Hello there!
Yoji: AHHHH!
Crawford: who is he calling a redhead?
Aya: *throws his katana at the car, spearing it, narrowly missing Schu's privates* (^_~)
Schuldich: Ah! Watch it cowboy! Or you're gonna be cooked tonight for dinnah!
Ken: *blinks* why the hell is schuldich talking like that?
Yoji: It's america! Everyone talks like that here! *beam* Now... before Aya kills me... we're going to the market.
Ken: For what?
Yoji: To get some chicken!

--- To be continued...? Maybe?