1012 - TOW Joey's New Job
It was 80 degrees outside and two-month-pregnant Rachel was sitting on the couch holding her 20-month-old daughter in her lap. Eight month pregnant Phoebe was sitting in the big chair of Monica and Chandler's apartment, her feet propped up, drinking lemonade. 8-month olds Alex and Ally were scooting around on the floor as the afternoon wore on.
Phoebe: God! Did somebody turn the heat on?
Rachel: I know . . . I'm baking in here!
Phoebe: Okay that's enough from you, Miss Not Due for Seven Months.
Rachel: Well, just because I'm only two-months-pregnant doesn't mean I'm not miserable.
Phoebe: Yeah, well, you try being pregnant with a fifteen pound baby!
Rachel: I don't think that's possible.
Phoebe: Well . . .it could be!
Rachel: Oh that's original!
Monica (running out of her bedroom): Girls! Girls! Stop arguing!
Ross walked into the apartment with two gallons of ice cream and two spoons.
Rachel: Oh, thank you sweetie. You're the best!
Ross handed one gallon of Cherry Garcia to Rachel and one gallon of Chunky Monkey to Phoebe.
Ross: Eat up girls.
Joey walked in wearing jeans, of all the clothes for the summer, jeans!
Rachel: Oh my God. Go away! You're making me hot just looking at you!
Joey got a surprised look on his face and a smile.
Rachel: Not in that way!
Joey: Oh . . .
Rachel: Why the hell are you wearing jeans? It's like a million degrees out there!
Joey: No reason. I just wanted to wear jeans today. Yeah . . . they're my summer jeans!
Phoebe: No . . . you're wearing jeans because you . . .
Joey: Phoebe! You promised you wouldn't tell anyone!
Phoebe: Sorry baby. I forgot.
Chandler walked in holding three pizza boxes.
Chandler: Pizza!
Phoebe and Rachel groaned at the smell but Joey, Monica, and Ross dove for it.
Rachel: So, where are the triplets, Phoebe?
Phoebe: Oh, they're at a birthday party.
Rachel: Oh . . . I see.
Everybody sat down to watch the two pregnant women eating their ice cream. Phoebe looked at Joey.
Phoebe: Here, give me some of that cheese from the breadsticks.
Joey handed his wife the cheese and she poured it on her Chunky Monkey ice cream. Everybody groaned except Rachel.
Rachel: Oh! That looks really good! Give me some of that.
Phoebe: Get your own cheese missy!
Rachel: Hey! Ross, give me some of that damned cheese!
Ross handed his wife the cheese and she poured it on her ice cream.
Rachel: Wow! This is great!
Everybody looked at each other strangely as the two pregnant women enjoyed their cheesy ice cream.
*~*
Later at Phoebe and Joey's apartment (Joey's apartment), Phoebe was sitting on a barstool reading a baby book.
Phoebe: . . ."And by the eighth month, you're bloated, constipated, and your ankles are swollen." Yeah, no crap!
Joey walked out of the bedroom carrying a manual.
Joey: Phoebe, do you know where the screwdriver is? There are these funny little things I have to screw into each post to put it on the frame of the crib.
Phoebe: I think the screwdriver is in your table by your side of the bed.
Joey: Well, what's it doing there?
Phoebe: I don't know. It was there when I moved in.
Joey: Oh . . .okay.
Phoebe: God, I could really go for some pickles, chocolate syrup, and cottage cheese.
Joey: Well . . .(Joey is looking a bit queasy.)
Phoebe: Oh well.
Joey: Hey, I have to go into work. We're filming the next scene in an hour. You page me if you need anything.
Phoebe: Okay.
Joey kissed Phoebe and left the apartment.
Phoebe: Don't forget the triplets on your way home!
*~*
Monica was laying on the patio of the apartment in her bathing suit. She had sun tan lotion on and she was wearing sunglasses. She was half-asleep, trying to get a tan and Chandler was inside the apartment playing with the twins in the bathtub. He had them in little bathing suits in luke-warm water. He was there to supervise the whole time, so Monica trusted that.
Monica heard something whistling and she figured it was a bird. But after and hour, she realized that somebody was whistling at her! She sat up quickly and took off her sunglasses. She quickly looked around and didn't see anyone. Until, finally, she looked to the side and saw that the woman from five apartments down was standing there whistling at her.
Monica: Oh my God!
Monica gathered her things and hurried into the apartment. Chandler came out of the bathroom with the twins in his arms.
Chandler: What happened?
Monica: A woman in our building was watching me! She was whistling too!
Chandler: Oh . . . that sounds . . . nice.
Monica: Oh, come on. That can't possibly turn you on.
Chandler: Well . . .
Monica: Oh my God! Men!
Chandler: Once again . . . we're sorry. We just like that kind of thing.
Monica: All of you?
Chandler: Most of us.
Monica rolled her eyes and took her babies into her arms.
Monica: Okay, somebody needs towels, fresh clothes and a nap. Yes they do!
Monica carried the babies into the nursery and shut the door.
*~*
Rachel was sitting on the floor of her living room. She'd just bought some pregnancy yoga tapes and decided to try them out. The room was calm, Ross was at work, and Hannah was playing in her nursery. Quiet was the best thing for yoga.
She breathed in and out, in and out, and watched the pregnant woman on the tape do her slow, gently yoga moves.
Rachel: I can do that.
Rachel tried a locust position while on her back and she yelped in pain.
Rachel: I guess I'm not as in shape as I thought.
She sat up into the locust position and it was more comfortable. The woman on the video was telling the audience to be calm, relaxed, and to breathe.
Rachel: I'm calm . . .I'm relaxed . . .
Hannah had managed to sneak out of the nursery and into the living room. She snuck up behind Rachel and patted her on the back.
Hannah: Boo!
Rachel jumped.
Rachel: Ahh!
She put her hand to her chest and turned around.
Rachel: Hannah! Don't ever scare mommy like that again!
Hannah: I'm sorry mommy.
Rachel smiled at her little girl and decided that yoga was over for the day. She picked up little Hannah and sat down on the couch with her.
Rachel: Hi sweetie.
Hannah: Hi mommy!
Rachel: Mommy is just getting in shape for the new baby. Are you excited about the new baby?
Hannah: No!
Rachel: Why's that?
Hannah: Because . . . too many baby!
Rachel: But we're only having one.
Hannah: I know . . .
Hannah got up and toddled to her nursery.
*~*
Later that evening, Joey, Phoebe, Monica, Chandler, Ross, Rachel, Hannah, the triplets, and the twins were gathered at Monica and Chandler's apartment. Joey was still in jeans and everyone was staring at him.
Joey: Fine! Do you want to see why I'm wearing jeans?
Everyone but Phoebe: Yes!
Phoebe shook her head.
Phoebe: It's really not a big deal.
Joey: Well, I guess you guys will find out when my movie comes out. He lifted up his jean legs to reveal some cleanly shaven legs.
Everybody: Oh my God!
Chandler: Joey shaved his legs!
Joey: It's not a big deal. It's for my character.
Chandler: And just what is that, ma'am?
Joey: Ha . . . Ha. Very funny. I'm playing a football player.
Phoebe: Yep. He's my football playing stud!
*~*
The next afternoon, Monica was sunbathing again and the same woman was whistling at her. Monica had enough so she stood up and began to yell.
Monica: Hey, lady! I'm not like that, so please don't whistle at me! I'm not comfortable with it! I know, it might be hard to stop, but you've gotta try.
The woman looked embarrassed and started to laugh.
Woman: I was whistling at the man two apartments over from you!
Monica looked to the other side to see a very handsome man sunbathing on his balcony. She got red in the face and ran inside. Everyone was there and they looked at her.
Ross: Monica, what's the matter with you?
Monica: Nothing . . . Joey shaved his legs!
Everybody looked at Monica for a moment and went back to what they were doing. Monica just rolled her eyes and went to her room to clean up. Ross looked over at Joey.
Ross: That's true. You really shouldn't have done that.
It was 80 degrees outside and two-month-pregnant Rachel was sitting on the couch holding her 20-month-old daughter in her lap. Eight month pregnant Phoebe was sitting in the big chair of Monica and Chandler's apartment, her feet propped up, drinking lemonade. 8-month olds Alex and Ally were scooting around on the floor as the afternoon wore on.
Phoebe: God! Did somebody turn the heat on?
Rachel: I know . . . I'm baking in here!
Phoebe: Okay that's enough from you, Miss Not Due for Seven Months.
Rachel: Well, just because I'm only two-months-pregnant doesn't mean I'm not miserable.
Phoebe: Yeah, well, you try being pregnant with a fifteen pound baby!
Rachel: I don't think that's possible.
Phoebe: Well . . .it could be!
Rachel: Oh that's original!
Monica (running out of her bedroom): Girls! Girls! Stop arguing!
Ross walked into the apartment with two gallons of ice cream and two spoons.
Rachel: Oh, thank you sweetie. You're the best!
Ross handed one gallon of Cherry Garcia to Rachel and one gallon of Chunky Monkey to Phoebe.
Ross: Eat up girls.
Joey walked in wearing jeans, of all the clothes for the summer, jeans!
Rachel: Oh my God. Go away! You're making me hot just looking at you!
Joey got a surprised look on his face and a smile.
Rachel: Not in that way!
Joey: Oh . . .
Rachel: Why the hell are you wearing jeans? It's like a million degrees out there!
Joey: No reason. I just wanted to wear jeans today. Yeah . . . they're my summer jeans!
Phoebe: No . . . you're wearing jeans because you . . .
Joey: Phoebe! You promised you wouldn't tell anyone!
Phoebe: Sorry baby. I forgot.
Chandler walked in holding three pizza boxes.
Chandler: Pizza!
Phoebe and Rachel groaned at the smell but Joey, Monica, and Ross dove for it.
Rachel: So, where are the triplets, Phoebe?
Phoebe: Oh, they're at a birthday party.
Rachel: Oh . . . I see.
Everybody sat down to watch the two pregnant women eating their ice cream. Phoebe looked at Joey.
Phoebe: Here, give me some of that cheese from the breadsticks.
Joey handed his wife the cheese and she poured it on her Chunky Monkey ice cream. Everybody groaned except Rachel.
Rachel: Oh! That looks really good! Give me some of that.
Phoebe: Get your own cheese missy!
Rachel: Hey! Ross, give me some of that damned cheese!
Ross handed his wife the cheese and she poured it on her ice cream.
Rachel: Wow! This is great!
Everybody looked at each other strangely as the two pregnant women enjoyed their cheesy ice cream.
*~*
Later at Phoebe and Joey's apartment (Joey's apartment), Phoebe was sitting on a barstool reading a baby book.
Phoebe: . . ."And by the eighth month, you're bloated, constipated, and your ankles are swollen." Yeah, no crap!
Joey walked out of the bedroom carrying a manual.
Joey: Phoebe, do you know where the screwdriver is? There are these funny little things I have to screw into each post to put it on the frame of the crib.
Phoebe: I think the screwdriver is in your table by your side of the bed.
Joey: Well, what's it doing there?
Phoebe: I don't know. It was there when I moved in.
Joey: Oh . . .okay.
Phoebe: God, I could really go for some pickles, chocolate syrup, and cottage cheese.
Joey: Well . . .(Joey is looking a bit queasy.)
Phoebe: Oh well.
Joey: Hey, I have to go into work. We're filming the next scene in an hour. You page me if you need anything.
Phoebe: Okay.
Joey kissed Phoebe and left the apartment.
Phoebe: Don't forget the triplets on your way home!
*~*
Monica was laying on the patio of the apartment in her bathing suit. She had sun tan lotion on and she was wearing sunglasses. She was half-asleep, trying to get a tan and Chandler was inside the apartment playing with the twins in the bathtub. He had them in little bathing suits in luke-warm water. He was there to supervise the whole time, so Monica trusted that.
Monica heard something whistling and she figured it was a bird. But after and hour, she realized that somebody was whistling at her! She sat up quickly and took off her sunglasses. She quickly looked around and didn't see anyone. Until, finally, she looked to the side and saw that the woman from five apartments down was standing there whistling at her.
Monica: Oh my God!
Monica gathered her things and hurried into the apartment. Chandler came out of the bathroom with the twins in his arms.
Chandler: What happened?
Monica: A woman in our building was watching me! She was whistling too!
Chandler: Oh . . . that sounds . . . nice.
Monica: Oh, come on. That can't possibly turn you on.
Chandler: Well . . .
Monica: Oh my God! Men!
Chandler: Once again . . . we're sorry. We just like that kind of thing.
Monica: All of you?
Chandler: Most of us.
Monica rolled her eyes and took her babies into her arms.
Monica: Okay, somebody needs towels, fresh clothes and a nap. Yes they do!
Monica carried the babies into the nursery and shut the door.
*~*
Rachel was sitting on the floor of her living room. She'd just bought some pregnancy yoga tapes and decided to try them out. The room was calm, Ross was at work, and Hannah was playing in her nursery. Quiet was the best thing for yoga.
She breathed in and out, in and out, and watched the pregnant woman on the tape do her slow, gently yoga moves.
Rachel: I can do that.
Rachel tried a locust position while on her back and she yelped in pain.
Rachel: I guess I'm not as in shape as I thought.
She sat up into the locust position and it was more comfortable. The woman on the video was telling the audience to be calm, relaxed, and to breathe.
Rachel: I'm calm . . .I'm relaxed . . .
Hannah had managed to sneak out of the nursery and into the living room. She snuck up behind Rachel and patted her on the back.
Hannah: Boo!
Rachel jumped.
Rachel: Ahh!
She put her hand to her chest and turned around.
Rachel: Hannah! Don't ever scare mommy like that again!
Hannah: I'm sorry mommy.
Rachel smiled at her little girl and decided that yoga was over for the day. She picked up little Hannah and sat down on the couch with her.
Rachel: Hi sweetie.
Hannah: Hi mommy!
Rachel: Mommy is just getting in shape for the new baby. Are you excited about the new baby?
Hannah: No!
Rachel: Why's that?
Hannah: Because . . . too many baby!
Rachel: But we're only having one.
Hannah: I know . . .
Hannah got up and toddled to her nursery.
*~*
Later that evening, Joey, Phoebe, Monica, Chandler, Ross, Rachel, Hannah, the triplets, and the twins were gathered at Monica and Chandler's apartment. Joey was still in jeans and everyone was staring at him.
Joey: Fine! Do you want to see why I'm wearing jeans?
Everyone but Phoebe: Yes!
Phoebe shook her head.
Phoebe: It's really not a big deal.
Joey: Well, I guess you guys will find out when my movie comes out. He lifted up his jean legs to reveal some cleanly shaven legs.
Everybody: Oh my God!
Chandler: Joey shaved his legs!
Joey: It's not a big deal. It's for my character.
Chandler: And just what is that, ma'am?
Joey: Ha . . . Ha. Very funny. I'm playing a football player.
Phoebe: Yep. He's my football playing stud!
*~*
The next afternoon, Monica was sunbathing again and the same woman was whistling at her. Monica had enough so she stood up and began to yell.
Monica: Hey, lady! I'm not like that, so please don't whistle at me! I'm not comfortable with it! I know, it might be hard to stop, but you've gotta try.
The woman looked embarrassed and started to laugh.
Woman: I was whistling at the man two apartments over from you!
Monica looked to the other side to see a very handsome man sunbathing on his balcony. She got red in the face and ran inside. Everyone was there and they looked at her.
Ross: Monica, what's the matter with you?
Monica: Nothing . . . Joey shaved his legs!
Everybody looked at Monica for a moment and went back to what they were doing. Monica just rolled her eyes and went to her room to clean up. Ross looked over at Joey.
Ross: That's true. You really shouldn't have done that.